Prue Phillipson - Hordens of Horden Hall (25 page)

Bel stared at him, open-mouthed, and then hugged Ursula to her. “How could you be so cruel, Father!”

He made a shooing motion with his hand. “You have wearied me to death with your obstinacy. In my poor health and after the blow that has so lately fallen upon me, I think many people would call your disobedience cruelty. Now leave me and consider carefully what I have said. You too, Ursula. And, as my daughter appears to value you more than her father, if you can give her wise advice I will be for ever grateful to you.”

Ursula bobbed deeply again but Bel clasped her hand and pulled her outside.

“To my room, quickly.” She bounded up the stairs still clutching her hand and didn’t release her till they were safe inside the narrow room.

“It used to have a bolt inside when it was a chapel but they took it away. Now it only has one outside. Well, Urs, all we can do is run away together. I will not be forced into marriage. We had better wait till after dark.”

Ursula’s bright eyes were twinkling with love. “Oh my Bel, I am not worth a break-up with your father. You shall not be forced into a marriage you hate, but you will not tear yourself from your family and go into a life of homeless wandering. I am well used to that. I will go quietly away and you will stay and love your father. I can see he is a man in need of love. Much, much love.”

Bel stamped her foot. “How could I love him now? I hate him. You speak of my family. I have not seen my mother and sister for a year and they never loved me. My brother is dead. That is still the strangest shock, but I never loved him. You are the only person I love and who loves me. You will
not
go away.”

Ursula smiled. “Now come, sit on the bed and we will think together. What you have just said is so very sad. It is a story of hate when there should be love. Are you going to add the young betrothed to your list of hates? And his parents too?”

“
He
is not worth hating, but I think I could hate
them
very easily. They think only of money and possessions.”

“But they are people with feelings like all of us. If you are loving to them, they will come to love you. If you show all the sweetness you have in your nature to their son, he will open to you like a flower. He will begin to love you and then you will soon find you love him too.”

“Oh Ursula, when you say it, it seems so easy. You do it. You are sweet and gentle and cheerful to everyone. But I have that within me that holds me back. I only want to be here with you and that those people should go away and Father; oh I am sad for him. He looks ill, but how could he put so dreadful a threat upon me?”

“But he is wounded by the loss of his son. It is so new and raw. All else about him should be peace but you are fighting him.”

“So you would have me say yes to what he asks! Is that really what you are saying?”

“Sweet Bel, you could say no
gently
. You could be soft-spoken. Ask that it should be put off while you are all grieving. You could be loving with him and he might long to keep you by his side since he will now be so alone.”

“You don’t understand. It’s already dragged on since the very first day I came home. They are all set on it being fixed now. But I shall never marry. I told them yesterday that I would learn about managing the estate to help Father.” In a sudden flash she recalled Robert’s word that Father might not survive the winter. A wicked, wicked thought reared up that she and Ursula could live happily here with no one to bully them about anything.

Ursula had slid down off the bed and was assessing her expression.

“My Bel, I must go and do my duties. Think and pray, my precious, and the good Lord will put good thoughts into your heart.” Bel was about to burst into protests but Ursula just gave her a loving smile and slipped out.

I do believe she guessed what I was thinking about father, she thought. She doesn’t know how hard it is for a murderer to have good thoughts. She put her hands together in an attitude of prayer and looked with her mind’s eye at each of the four people in turn who could influence her destiny. A few pitiful thoughts floated in her father’s direction but bounced back, hardened by the horrible dilemma he had put her in. As for Clifford Horden, it was a struggle to send any good thoughts in
his
direction. His sharp face and Puritan haircut positively repelled her. His manner was cold and imperious. Whether William would turn out the same she couldn’t possibly tell, because as yet he seemed to have no character at all. To send good thoughts his way would be like shooting at a wraith. But then there was Celia. Ursula had suggested everyone had feelings and Celia had shown glimmerings when she had reached across the table and said she wanted a daughter. Bel felt quite moved when she thought of the three little girls she had lost, whether in babyhood or later she didn’t know.

She fired off some kindly thoughts to Celia Horden and found herself thinking, but she was putting on a show to win me; she
is
under Clifford’s thumb. All she’s ever said to me was to persuade me to do what he wants. She’s not interested in me as me.

“You see, Urs,” she said aloud to the empty room, “it’s no good.”

She went to the window and stood looking out. There was Sir Ralph on his horse, totally indifferent to the death that had happened right there below on his stone platform. Bel shook her fist at him. “You killed your great-grandson, don’t you know, you stupid old man.” She became aware of a figure coming into view and waving a hand to her. It was Celia Horden. “Oh heaven, she thought I was waving to her. Why, she’s alone. Well, I do feel
something
for her so I must catch her now. She’s my only hope,” and without putting on a shawl she flew downstairs and dragged open the big front door.

Celia was sauntering past the statue, pausing to look up at it, but she heard her footsteps and turned to greet her with a smile.

She’s such a funny little round figure, Bel thought. I’m not in the least afraid of her. It’s the first time I’ve spoken to her on her own.

But Celia in her voluble way didn’t give her time to speak. She tucked her arm through Bel’s and began, “Now my dear, I must apologise for my shy boy. Here he is, for the first time in his life, coming a-courting and what does he say to his lady-love? Absolutely nothing. Of course you can have no impression what he’s like and I don’t at all wonder at your reluctance to say you’ll marry him. But I really must tell you that he is not only most industrious, but actually clever. Any subject he applies himself to he can master in the time it would take most people barely to learn the rudiments. What he hasn’t had the chance to master is how to talk to young ladies. If his sisters had only lived, what a difference that would have made! He would have met all their friends from an early age and he wouldn’t be afraid of anyone in skirts.”

When she paused for breath Bel managed to say, “I don’t want to be thought of or talked to as a young lady. When he was about eight and I was five you came to visit and he called me Pig-face.”

“Gracious, my dear, I hope you’ve forgiven him for that. I had no idea!”

“It was good. I put my tongue out at him. At least we were communicating.”

“Ah, I can see it is as I suspected. You want to get to know him and he’s making it difficult. I have had words with him this morning and he has promised to try harder.”

Bel felt the conversation was taking the wrong turn. “No, truly, Ma’am, I don’t want him to. I do not want to marry, not now or ever.”

“Ah well, of course that will change, but I see how it is. You are unusually young for your age, even childish I may say. Some young ladies of almost fifteen are quite grown and sophisticated but you run about and speak out of turn just like a little girl. Not your fault, I am sure, for you have lacked a mother’s care for a whole year and the school they sent you to – well! Never mind, it is closed now.”

They had walked round the lawns and arrived at the fish pond again. Bel took the chance to disengage her arm so she could stoop and clear more of the twigs that had gathered at the rim near them. “I don’t know why they closed that school,” she said. “I’ve no other experience of schools, so I can’t say if it was better or worse than another.”

“It was a
Popish
establishment. Dreadful contamination for a good Protestant girl.”

Bel shrugged. “I didn’t notice. We went to the Parish Church on Sundays.”

“You had to, by law of course, but never mind that, you are away from there now and Sir John very wisely didn’t send you back. What I am thinking, my dear, is that you and William should consider yourselves betrothed now but wait till you are sixteen and he is twenty before you marry.”

Bel stood very still, oblivious of the bunch of wet twigs clutched in her hands, thinking furiously. She had come out to try to convince this lady that she could never be her daughter-in -law. But could this be a possible compromise? A betrothal was generally considered binding, but it was not a marriage. And Ursula would not have to go away. They would gain precious time, a whole year together. Who knew what might happen in a year! If Father is better he might expect to take me to France to see Henrietta’s baby and Ursula could go as my lady’s maid. We might all be drowned on the way back. Perhaps if I drowned with Ursula she might get me into heaven despite my devils. Oh anything could happen in a year! William might even fall in love with someone else!

“You’re quiet, Arabella. What think you of my suggestion? I am quite prepared to tell the gentlemen that neither of you are ready for marriage. William would certainly have conformed to our wishes, but as his mother I do believe he is not quite ready.”

Bel nodded vigorously. “He is not and neither am I.”

“Very well, let us walk back to the house. This pond must have sad associations for you since it was from here you ran so hastily to spare that odd little creature, we sometimes see flitting about the Hall. And what a tragic outcome that was! I think it was then I realised how very young and impulsive you still are. But a year will work wonders and you shall spend much of it in London where you will see how society conducts itself. Come, let us go in.”

Bel reluctantly set her feet in motion. She wanted to stay rooted to the spot watching the little fish flash hither and thither, young and carefree, and not obliged to go to London. That had not been part of the bargain if indeed a bargain had been made. But she knew her father would not want to go to London – if he was indeed well enough to make the journey. He had never liked the smoke and noise and smells.

So she slowed to Celia Horden’s pace back to the Hall, while plans darted about in her head. I must submit to the betrothal. I must show myself sweet and dutiful to my father so he will agree to this delay. I will find Ursula and tell her and she will help me to be good. I will behave like a young lady – but not too much so or Celia will forget how childish I am. But oh if I have escaped from the impossible choice Father gave me –! She could hardly restrain herself from skipping ahead and running to Ursula with the news.

It was of course the dinner hour and nothing was said or done till afterwards when she knew the elder Hordens were closeted in the study with her father. William had disappeared to Robert’s room which he now had to himself and Nurse had gone to have her afternoon rest in the housekeeper’s room.

Sam had returned to the farm till he was needed again and Mary had walked him part of the way because she knew Ursula would do all the clearing up. Bel had Ursula to herself in the kitchen and was able to hang up for her the brass pans and kitchen tools which she had to climb on a stool to reach.

“So you think the horrid knot is untangling, my Bel, and you can see a straight way ahead.”

“If Cousin Celia can make the men see reason.”

“And you are ready to plight your troth to young William?”

“We will buy time. You and I will not have to run away.”

“But you don’t expect to marry him?”

Bel looked at her doubtfully. “You
are
going to stand with me in this, aren’t you, Urs? I am doing this to keep you. Nothing else matters.”

“My precious, I will never leave you if I can help it.” She put her little arms round Bel’s waist and hugged her. “But if you make a promise you don’t expect to keep, I will think my Bel is not chiming as clear and true as she might.”

“Is that all?” Bel chuckled. “You know I can never live to your standards.”

She whirled her round the kitchen till her bonnet was awry. Then she stopped. She had heard footsteps. Ursula adjusted her bonnet and began scrubbing the table as Bel hastened to the door. Her father was at the head of the steps to the kitchen.

“I thought you must be here,” he said, glimpsing Ursula at work. “I believe we have peace at last.” He stretched his hands to her as she came to meet him. “You have agreed to a betrothal and we have settled your marriage to William Horden for the Spring of 1643, God willing.”

Bel swallowed hard. Was this what she had done? She let her father lead her to the parlour where they were now all assembled. A little ceremony was performed in which she and William repeated words to each other and momentarily held hands. All the time she was saying in her head, it is only October 41. April 43 is an age away. Where will we all be by then? Where will the world be?