Playing with Monsters (18 page)

“Explain,” I urged.

“I like to have total control in the bedroom. The women I have sex with have no problem giving it to me. I become the master, and they become whatever I crave them to be,” he said with a guarded look in his eyes.

“You make them slaves?” I countered with a question, my heart racing at his close proximity.

“Some. I like them to feel helpless, dependent on me. I like to make them beg for things, and I enjoy their pain.”

I blinked rapidly. What. The. Fuck? Sadist?

“You’re a sadist,” I whispered.

“I’m whatever I want to be at the moment,” he countered as he moved even closer. “Is the water too hot?”

“No, why?” I asked carefully.

“Because your skin is red,” he said with a small smirk as he placed his hands against the pool on either side of me, trapping me in the spot I sat in. “Think you could handle doing whatever I wanted you to?” he whispered hoarsely.

“No,” I replied honestly. “I’m not into those types of things,” I finished breathlessly.

“Is that why you were so fucking wet today? Because you weren’t into it at all?” he asked as he pushed away and seated himself across from me.

“It wasn’t what I was seeing that was turning me on, Lucian,” I whispered watching him from beneath my lashes. “It was you.”

“Liar,” he laughed softly. “Then why were you hiding from me all day?” he asked as he rested the back of his head his against the side of the pool, and closed his eyes.

Chapter Twenty-One

“I wasn’t hiding,” I lied as my eyes focused on a tendril of water as it slowly moved down his chest.

“Hiding because you want me, or hiding because you’re unsure of how you felt today?” he questioned.

“Today shouldn’t have happened,” I replied softly as I glanced back up at him. He opened his eyes and studied me for a long moment before he spoke.

“You want me, and you were turned on by what you saw. You just can’t admit it yet, which is fine; you’ll get there. Admitting you want me is the first step down a very dark path. I’m willing to lead you down it, Lena.”

“As
if
,” I blatantly lied to him as my heart raced, my pupils dilated, and my back arched a sliver. I fought to control the reaction I had to him. “Tell me about the ritual.” I changed the subject to something a little safer—okay, a
lot
safer.

He smiled coldly and whatever had been in his eyes slipped back inside of him. He pushed off the edge of the pool and moved towards me. When he was closer, he sat beside me and once again rested his head on the pool’s slick side.

“We will exchange words, and I will see into your past. How far I go depends on you. I’m just along for the ride. It is a bit like hypnosis; we will be delving past your conscious mind to your unconscious mind, only, instead of you telling me what you see, I’ll be able to see it too. The herbs in the water and flowers should help you focus on particular events.”

“Do we stay naked for it?” I asked apprehensively.

“We will be in robes for the ritual itself. The spell is difficult, so precautions will be taken,” he whispered as he opened his eyes and turned his head to look at me. “Don’t trust me?” he asked after a tense moment had passed.

“I just don’t trust anyone when I’m naked and out of it.”

“What we did today, Lena, it was consensual,” he whispered as his hand slipped through the water and slid over the inside of my thigh.

My breathing hitched, and then got stuck in my lungs as he closed his eyes again and continued rubbing my leg erotically.

“Lucian,” I whispered breathlessly. 

He moved so quickly that I didn’t have time to respond, or even react. His immense body pinned mine to the side of the pool, and his heavy cock rested on my belly. I looked down, noting that it went past my navel, and was incredibly thick. It twitched and my eyes flew up to Lucian’s. I opened my mouth, only to have it filled with his hungry, dominating kiss.

I moaned against him as he rubbed himself against my stomach. His hands captured mine as I tried to place them against his chest. His kiss was hungry, intoxicating my senses and lowering any argument I might have had about him being this close to me naked.

One hand held mine locked in a vise grip while the other pulled carefully at my hair, opening my jaw even wider for his kiss until it hurt. My nipples hardened, need filling them with every passing second his mouth remained locked with mine. Moans filled the small room, both his and mine, and I felt him parting my thighs. I willingly helped him, until a knock sounded and he pulled away from me so fast, I barely registered that he had.

We struggled to control our breathing, fought against the overwhelming lust and sexual tension that filled the room. His eyes watched me, as surely as mine watched him as he controlled his labored breathing.

“This isn’t finished,” he warned as he turned his head and called for the intruder to come inside the room.

That was it! I was going to the abbey and joining the damn thing! This man drove me over the edge of sanity, and straight to the fucking crazy train boarding for the loony bin. I’d never been so sexually frustrated in my entire life.

I watched as one of the elders entered, and Lucian slipped from the pool unabashedly to take the white robe the elder offered him. I followed his cue, watching his back as I slipped into my own robe with a little help from the elder. The silk was soft and cool against my heated flesh, and I felt a shiver as they helped me pull the hood up.

I followed Lucian’s broad back through the door we’d entered the hidden room in, and towards another room. On the other side of the entrance was another small room that housed something that almost looked like an altar. In the middle of the room was a wide circular table carved out of redwood and low platforms that looked like kneelers had been carved from stone and were placed intermittently on the floor around the table. Salt had been poured in a ring on the floor surrounding the table and rocks. In the center of the table, a crude pentagram had been carved into the wood. In the middle of the pentagram was a chalice along with a long, ornate ceremonial athame.

I felt Lucian at my side, his finger slowly touching mine for comfort as I started to panic. That simple touch said a million things, yet nothing at all.

“Are you guilty, Lena?” he whispered, even though we were close enough for others to hear him.

“Oh, what exactly am I being accused of? No one has said much of anything about which charges or what they really think I have done,” I replied through trembling lips.

“You’ll do fine,” he smiled reassuringly even though he dodged the question. “Kneel at the table; the salt will keep us protected and grounded from anything that seeks to harm us inside the world created by the spell.” 

“You didn’t say anything about leaving this world,” I hissed as I decided which of the kneelers I would rather be at. 

“It’s going to be okay, Magdalena, I’ll protect you,” he said with a sexy half-smirk. “I got you; nothing bad will happen when you are with me.”

I kneeled on the smooth stones, placed my hands on the altar, and watched as he did the same. I watched silently as he whispered a few words in a strange language, and the candles shot to life with flames too high and too hot for the small room we were inside of. He chanted, softly at first, until everyone started repeating his words.

My heart raced so quickly that it hurt, and I trembled as the power rushed through the room and me. It was immense, making it hard to breathe, almost as if I’d grown claustrophobic instantly. I felt tears as they slid down my cheeks unchecked. The flames flickered against the walls as the only light fixture blew out, sending glass shards onto the floor close to us.

“Is that normal?” I whispered, but Lucian had his eyes closed, chanting with the others in the room. It was surreal, the maddening sounds of an entire room filled with people chanting the same thing over and over. The candles flickered, illuminating the protection runes that covered the walls. I wanted to cover my ears, protect myself, or run away. Maybe do all three.

My hood was pushed back by a gust of wind, and my eyes moved towards the door to see who had entered, only to find it still closed. I turned back to find that Lucian’s hood had been pushed back as well, and he no longer chanted with the others. His eyes were locked with mine, and his left hand was palm-up on the altar as he reached for the ceremonial athame with his right. I watched in horrified silenced as he whispered more words and sliced through his palm.

I yipped and started to move away, but those eyes…They held me lost inside their tempting depths, and without breaking the new chant he had started, he told me to remain still. I expelled a steady breath and held my hand out for the blade, accepting it to do as he had done. He repeated the words; I followed his lead in dutifully repeating it verbatim, then sliced through my palm and hissed at the pain. He took the blade from me and placed it on the altar as he picked up the chalice and drank from the red liquid before handing it to me.

Don’t let it be blood, don’t let it be blood…Wine, yes! I drank deeply, taking more than I should have before I placed it back on the altar, and watched for Lucian to lead me. He relaxed a little before he held his bloody palm out for mine. I hesitated, wanting to do the spell, but not wanting any bond that came from using blood magic—not with this man. After a moment of hesitation, I placed my hand palm-down against his. Blood mixed, the candles erupted, chants became frenzied, and then I’m pretty sure I passed out.

“Breathe, Lena. Let it happen,” Lucian’s voice cut through my mind, bringing me back to the here and now. Or at least that’s what I thought. We’d been in the room with the altar…

I turned to look at a little child, barely more than a toddler. She had long caramel colored hair that was gathered into a high ponytail; stray strands had come undone and circled her cherubic face.

“Joshy!” I cried. I was chasing my brother, who couldn’t have been more than five or six years old. I was giggling as he made faces at me, getting me to walk a little more as he took a few large steps away from me. I fell, big alligator tears began to drop from my blue eyes, and he dropped to the ground beside me.

“Don’t cry, little Lenny, I got you. You were so big! You did so well. You walked before Kendra, always the first to try everything. I’m so proud of you,” he said encouragingly, even though I’d remained on the floor beside him, bawling.

Tears filled my eyes as I watched my brother being tender with the baby I’d been, holding me as I cried. He’d only been a child, yet he had always been there for me as Mom focused on Kendra, who always seemed to take more of her attention.

“It’s too far back, Lena. Take me to where we need to be,” Lucian said. I turned to find him watching me as I wiped at the tears, unwilling to allow them to fall.

“I don’t want to leave him,” I admitted.

“He’s not real, it’s just a memory,” he whispered as he placed his hand against my face. “Focus for me.”

“Did she do it?” Grandpa asked, his wrinkled face filled with pride as he watched me struggle to get back up.

“Grandpa,” I whispered brokenly.

“Of course she did, Papa, she’s my sister. Lenny’s going to be tough as rocks by the time I teach her everything I know!” Joshua declared with a cheeky grin.

“I know she will be, what with you for a brother and treating her like she’s your equal. She ought to be a force to reckon with when she’s old enough to date.”

“Gah, never! She’ll never date. That’s gross!”

Grandpa laughed and shook his head. “You say that now, boy, but someday someone’s going to steal her heart. When they break it, you’ll be there to break their nose for me?” he laughed as Joshua shook his dark head vigorously.

“No one is ever going to break her heart; she’s going to be the prettiest girl in the entire world! Even prettier than Momma is.”

The memory faded and I exhaled a shuddering breath that seemed to do little to calm the pain I’d felt at watching my brother in a memory I hadn’t even known I’d had.

We’d left one memory to another one. This one I couldn’t place. I heard a woman’s screams rip through the woods around us, and I felt as if the wind had been knocked out of me. We were in a forest, thick with greenery. The screaming was coming closer, getting louder as whoever was screaming moved right towards us.

“Where are we, Lena?” Lucian asked and I shook my head.

“I don’t know this place,” I whispered as I tried to find anything I could recognize. I could make out smoke over the tops of the trees, high in the sky. The stench of it singed my nose with the subtle reminder of the fire I’d just been in. I moved in a circle. “Can you smell that?” I asked, wondering if he as tuned in to the memory as I was.

“Lena, come to me, now,” he ordered sharply, and I did without hesitation, as if he was my anchor to this place.

A woman tore through the bushes, her blonde hair disheveled and her old fashioned corseted dress ripped; that dress made her look like she escaped from a Ren Faire. She tripped and landed hard on the ground; masculine laughter followed her as I moved to help her up.

“You can’t interact,” Lucian growled as his eyes consumed the woman as if he knew her. “Bloody hell,” he growled thickly as he pushed my head against his chest.

A horrified scream ripped from the woman as she jumped to her feet and fled through the brush once more. I tore myself from Lucian, needing to see what it was that she was so terrified of. Her screaming escalated as I moved closer to her, and the smoke grew even thicker as I pushed through the bushes, Lucian hot on my heels.

I skidded to a sudden halt as I broke free from the forest. Bodies littered the ground, pools of blood everywhere. Something had torn these humans into pieces.
Fucking pieces
! I covered my mouth to muffle my own scream of horror as the terrifying sight sank in. Sadistic laughter sounded from the bushes, growing closer with every second.

“You don’t belong here!” The woman shouted, looking right at me. I paused. In the last memory, Joshua and Grandpa hadn’t noticed me.

“You can see me?” I whispered as I looked over my shoulder to find no one there. Not even Lucian.

“Magdalena, go home! You don’t belong here, you must help me, and I need you in your own time! You have to stop this from happening again. Leave now before he senses the ripple! Find the grimoires; they are closer than you think they are. They hold the keys of the past to save the future. Don’t let him do this to your people; you must protect them from him. I have failed, but if you are here, it means he is close. Now go, please. He comes.”

She took off running, leaving me dumbfounded as I turned to find Lucian with a wide-eyed look on his face, his mouth twisted into an angry frown as I turned to look for the man who was pushing through the bushes, chasing the woman. Lucian growled an angry curse and moved towards me, shoving my face against his chest, smothering me. My lungs burned for air. I could hear sardonic laughter, and the world was beginning to spin around me.

When he finally pulled me from his chest I slapped at him. I caught air into my starved lungs and fell to my knees as I looked around us, trying to judge where I’d taken us to now. I’d wanted to leave the other place, but I wasn’t sure who had moved us, me or him.

I was in my bedroom, and Todd and Cassidy were making grotesque noises in my bed. I closed my eyes, not wanting to relive the horror. I knew it was coming, because I was standing just inside my bedroom, watching them with stark pain etched into my face.

“How could you do this to me, to us? I loved you! I wanted to give you the rest of my life, Todd. Her? You’re with her?” I screamed as his head turned and his eyes grew large and round. He scrambled from the bed, his dick still hard, bare. He hadn’t even cared to use protection. I turned to run but he was faster. His hand bit into my arm, pulling me back as he slammed me against the wall.

“Lena, I can explain!” he rushed, his words breathless from fucking Cassidy. I tried to move, and he pushed me back against the wall as Cassidy laughed, her skirt still up from where she’d lifted it for my fiancé to gain entrance.

“She’s waiting, Todd; tell her how you’ve been fucking me while waiting for her to figure it out. Tell her how you never planned to marry her,” she said snidely, and Todd’s eyes got even bigger.

“That’s not true, Lena, I love you. Only you, baby. It’s always ever been you and me. We’re always together, remember?” he begged, his eyes widening as he saw the hate that was building inside me.

“Asshole,” I whispered, watching the ‘me’ of the past as she slammed those walls down and became cold. They’d done it in my home, in my bed, as if they’d planned on being caught.

I moved us from the memory without checking to see Lucian’s look of pity that would surely be there.

“Ma’am, is your mother home?” the soldier asked, his hat crumbled in his hands as he looked at me with a pitying stare. He was older, hardened by war. Scars adorned his face, his hands, and his neck. Behind him stood a decrepit priest, probably in his late seventies or early eighties. He barely made it up the stairs by himself.

I heard Mom coming and turned to look at her. I wanted to push her away from the door, hide her from what I already knew was coming. This wasn’t fucking happening. It couldn’t be. I was trembling as it soaked in. My hands were fisted at my sides and I shook my head.

There was only one reason the United States of America’s Army showed up on your door with a priest in tow, and that was to tell you that someone had been killed in action. My knees started to buckle, and I backed up. Mom stopped in the doorway, her hands reaching out as she figured it out.