Pieces of Me (19 page)

“Look
at me, Delaney.”

His
voice is whisper soft, rough with desire and something else that causes the
heat to flare to life again inside of me. My eyes flick up, meeting his.

“Keep
your eyes on me,” he says softly, shifting until his body is lined up perfectly
with mine. “I want you to watch me, to see me.”

My
lips go slack as I feel the tip of him right at my entrance. There is no fear,
no hesitation on my end as I lift my hips up to take him in.

As
he slides in fully for the first time he whispers, “I love you, Delaney.”

And
then there is no air left for words as he finds a rhythm, moving in and out,
building another fire inside of me that burns even hotter than the first, until
it is the only thing there is. The weight of his body over mine, inside of
mine, the heavy sound of our breathing mixing together.

I
feel myself shatter again just moments before he does, and the feeling is so
exquisite that it steals my breath.

“I
love you,” he breaths into the crook of my neck, where his head has dropped. My
hands had settled on his hips, digging into the skin there as he had moved.

I
tilt my head, brushing my lips over the arm that lays there. I will never be
able to explain exactly what he has done for me, what he has given me back. I
wish I had the words to tell him how I feel. He was the last piece that I
needed to put myself back together.

“Get your
lazy asses out of bed. Somebody needs to make us breakfast.”

I feel Cole
shift next to me, but instead of rolling over to get out of bed, he turns into
me, arms wrapping around my waist to pull me back into the warmth of his body.
I wiggle back against him, trying to get even closer, and smile at the feel of
his arousal between us.

“Oh, no. No
morning nookie. I’m starving.”

One of his
hands slides up from my waist, inching towards my breast as he says, “Then I
suggest you either learn how to cook or stock up on cereal, Grace.”

I stifle a
laugh, biting my lip to keep it from coming out. His fingers trace just under
the edge of my breast, a particularly sensitive area for me, and the laugh
nearly escapes as a moan. I try to move even further into him.

“I cannot
tell you exactly how gross this is,” Grace mutters from the doorway.

“Then get lost,”
Cole suggests, his lips nuzzling against my neck. I almost forget she’s
standing there when his other hand starts to move down my body. I stretch out
against him, giving full reign of every inch of my skin to his incredibly
talented fingers.

“I never
should have moved in here.” Grace groans, right before shutting my bedroom
door. Seconds later the entire apartment is drowning in music, and I can’t stop
the laugh that escapes.

“Are we
really that loud?” I ask, turning over in the bed so I’m now facing him. I let
my fingers run over the scruff of hair on his chin, delighting in the contrast
to the smoothness that is usually there.

He smiles.
“We can certainly give it a shot this morning if you’d like.”

One hand
slips between my legs, parting my thighs so he can slide his fingers over the
slick skin he finds there. My breath hitches, my fingers digging into the skin
of his forearms as he starts a lazy pace of moving those fingers in and out of
my body.

“You’re
biting your lip,” he murmurs, moving closer so his mouth can skim across my
jaw. “You know what that does to me.”

“I can feel
what it does to you.”

He has
hardened even more between us as I move my lower lip in between my teeth.  I
roll my body into his until he is sprawled on his back and I can slither over
his body. His eyes are closed, his head tilted back, and I lift up and then
settle back down so he slips inside of me.

It takes
only seconds to find a rhythm that pushes us both over the edge.

“I love
waking up with you,” he says, brushing my hair back over my shoulders. 
“Absolute best part of the day.”

Laughing I
roll out of the bed.  “Well, I’m done with you now, handsome, time to get up.”

“I feel so
used.”

An hour
later I step out of my room pulling my hair up into a high pony tail while I make
my way down the hall and into the kitchen. Grace has turned the music down
significantly, and I can hear her and Grant talking in the living room.

Grace had
shown up the last day of spring break and asked to take me to dinner. It hadn’t
taken long for me to realize that she wasn’t angry with me; she was hurt.

It had
started out as anger. She’d been pissed that I had hurt Cole, and heartbroken
that I seemed to throw our friendship away like it was nothing. But once she
had known the truth, it had been hurt that I hadn’t felt like I could tell her,
that I didn’t trust her or our friendship enough to be honest and open.

Then she’d
told me she was moving in with me.

“Hey, Grace,
are you still hungry? I can make some pancakes,”  I ask, moving into the kitchen
and opening the fridge to pull out a bottle of water.

“Delaney.”

I freeze, my
hand stilling on the bottle, at the sound of my father’s voice calling my
name.  When I turn around he is standing nervously in the living room.

Grace shoots
me an apologetic look and mouths the words “Want me to stay?” I discretely
shake my head no, and watch as she moves out of the room, dragging Grant with
her down the hall to her room.

She gives my
arm a gentle squeeze on her way past, a simple sign of support that means more
than I’ll ever be able to tell her.

My father
looks like he’s aged ten years in the short amount of time that I’ve been gone,
to the point that I almost don’t recognize the old man standing in front of me.

His hair is
disheveled, which I have never seen before, and he’s dressed down for him.
Khaki pants, a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I’ve
only ever seen him in designer three piece suits.

“I, ah,
didn’t realize you had roommates.” He tucks his hands in the pockets of his pants.

I nod my
head dumbly. “Yes, Grace just moved when the spring semester ended. I didn’t
even think to check with you. Is it a problem?”

“Of course
not. I’m glad you’re not alone.”

I hadn’t
told my parents anything about Cole, so I wince when I hear the door to my
bedroom open and Cole moving down the hall.

“Hey, babe,
have you seen my wallet?” His strokes his hand across my back as he moves past
me into the kitchen. “You okay?” he asks, noting how tense my body is.

“Cole, I’d
like to introduce you to my father, Alexander Roberts.”

Cole lifts
his head, his eyes moving to the living room where my father is still standing,
a look of shock settling on his face as he studies Cole.

I clear my
throat before saying, “Dad, this is Cole Marsh. My boyfriend.”

“It’s nice
to meet you, sir.”

I wonder
briefly if my dad hears the tension in Cole’s voice like I do. Cole doesn’t
understand how my parents had let me slip away so easily from them. It’s hard
to explain to someone with parents like Tom and Clare Marsh.

I reach back
and lock my hand around Cole’s before moving into the living room, dragging him
with me. I’m not sure what has brought my father here, but I’m not facing it
alone.

“I wasn’t
expecting you, Dad.”

Like I was
never ever expecting him to show up at all. Ever.

“There’s
something I wanted to tell you.”

“And you
couldn’t call?”

Keeping my
hand locked in Coles’ I sink down on the couch. I watch my father intently;
waiting for him to tell me whatever it is that had him flying all the way
across the country to tell me face to face.  “Is everything okay with Mom?”

“She’s fine.
She’s at home, resting.”

Which is
code for she’s either drunk, or convinced that she’s dying of some mysterious
ailment, maybe both.

He settles
on the little reading chair across from the couch, dropping his forearms across
his knees with a heavy sigh. He immediately shifts again, leaning back in the
chair and running a hand through his hair, messing it up even more.

“Would it be
better if we were alone?” His gaze flicks from Cole and the back to me.

“Anything
you need to say to me you can say in front of Cole.” I nervously lick my lips.
“He knows everything.”

His eyes
widen, and I watch as he once again moves forward in the chair, his arms
dropping back against his knees. He rubs one hand down his face and when he
looks back up at me he looks on the verge of tears.

“Robert
Thomas is dead.”

I feel Cole
stiffen next to me, but I just stare at my father blankly, unsure of how I’m
supposed to respond. How I’m supposed to feel, really.

I had
pictured his death a thousand different times, in a thousand different ways. For
months his death had been the only thing I could focus on. And now that it had
happened I didn’t feel anything at all.

“I wanted to
tell you in person.” My gaze jerks back to my father, still sitting in the tiny
reading chair, watching me carefully like he is afraid I am going to break.

But I’m not.
Maybe I would have in the past, correction; I definitely would have fallen
apart in the past. But I wasn’t the same person I had been even three months
ago.

My father is
studying me so carefully that I want to squirm under his gaze. After a few
minutes of watching me a sad smile comes across his face. “You look good,
Delaney. Happy.”

“I am,” I
say without hesitation. Because I am deliriously happy. My gaze automatically
turns to Cole.

“I’m happier
than I ever thought I would be again.”

“I’m glad. I
wish,” he swallows, “I wish I had known how to give you that smile again. I let
you down, on so many levels. I didn’t protect you. Worse than that, I brought
him into our lives, into our home.”

He blamed
himself. How had I never seen that before? Is that why he had shut himself off
from me? Because he felt guilty?

“Oh, Daddy,
it wasn’t your fault.”

His eyes
shoot up, meeting mine. “I couldn’t do anything. When we found out you were
gone. All this money I had spent my entire adult life focused on accumulating,
and none of it meant shit when you were gone. It couldn’t help me get you
back.” His hands rake through his hair again. “And then they found you, but you
weren’t you anymore. You weren’t my little girl.”

He shoots to
his feet, shoving his hands in his pocket again.

“I didn’t
know how to help you. When you wanted to move three thousand miles away for
school, it was the first thing you had asked for since….well, since. I would
have given you anything you asked, and the only thing you asked was to get
away. So I let you go.”

“Coming here
is the best decision I ever made.”

That sad
smile plays across his face again. “I can see that.”

“I never
blamed you,” I whisper. “Not once. And I appreciate that you understood why I
couldn’t stay there. But I wish you had tried harder to hold onto me.”

“Me too.”

“But it’s
not too late to start now.” I squeeze Cole’s hand again. “That’s one of the
biggest things I’ve learned in the last few months. Sometimes second chances
are even better than the first.”