Perfect Fling (11 page)

He shrugged as if he didn’t care, but she knew the damage was done.

“I’ll be at Joe’s, enjoying my break. Make sure you call or text when you’re on your way back and I’ll meet you here.” He walked out, his footsteps ringing as he hit the hall, leaving Erin with a stomachache and a tiny hole in her heart.

• • •

It was so good to have her parents back and the
whole family in one place. Sam, Mike and Cara, and Erin were all at the house. Erin didn’t realize how much she’d missed her folks until she found herself wrapped in their welcoming embrace. Suddenly the stress of her life caved in on her and she burst into tears.

Ella Marsden stepped back and braced her hand on Erin’s shoulders. “I’m here now.” She looked over Erin’s shoulder to Simon, Mike, and Sam. “We’ll be back. You all catch up without us.” Then, taking Erin’s hand, Ella led her to the kitchen, her mother’s domain and sanctuary.

“You know what that’s about?” Erin heard her father ask her brothers.

She cringed, not knowing what they’d reveal, but after her emotional outburst, she figured
everything
was a fair guess.

“What’s going on?” her mother asked.

Erin looked at her mom, who appeared healthy and happy. The wavy auburn hair she’d shared with Erin framed her face. If possible, the stress of Simon’s cancer last year had dissipated, thanks to their overdue vacation, and Erin was pleased.

“I guess you wouldn’t rather tell me about your trip?” she asked, hoping to stall the inevitable.

Her mother shot her a look that, when Erin and her brothers were kids, had meant
Talk now, or else
.

“Okay.” Erin glanced down at her hands, which she’d begun twisting together. “The night of Mike’s wedding, I was feeling . . . out of sorts.”

“Lonely,” Ella said softly.

Eyes filling again, Erin nodded. “It seemed like everyone around me was finding that special someone. I guess I was feeling sorry for myself, so I stopped at Joe’s on the way home and . . . Cole Sanders was there.”

Ella’s face remained understanding just as she kept silent, letting Erin tell the story at her own speed.

“We danced. One thing led to another and . . . we had a one-night stand.” Erin didn’t meet Ella’s gaze. Discussing sex with her mother wasn’t exactly comfortable. “And it was just that one night.” No need to mention how many times that evening, Erin thought. “He barely spoke to me in the days afterward.”

“And that hurt your feelings,” Ella said with a woman’s wisdom and a parent’s understanding.

Erin nodded. “A lot. But I understood. He’d just come back to town and he obviously had been through something bad before coming home.” She drew a deep breath. “About a month later, I started getting nauseous.”

“Oh my God.” Ella clasped Erin’s clenched hands. Obviously there was no need to go on. Her mother got the point loud and clear.

“I guess I didn’t want to face it, because I didn’t let myself make the connection, and as a result I didn’t take a test for a while. Anyway, I couldn’t bring myself to tell anyone, because I needed to process it myself.”

“Does Cole know?”

Erin exhaled a long breath. “He does now, but he didn’t then.” She lifted her head, met her mom’s gaze. “There’s more.”

“I’m listening.” To her mother’s credit, she held on to Erin’s hand and didn’t say a word, not judging or asking questions.

“The day after you left, I was on my way to work when I was shot in the parking lot.”

“What!” Ella’s face leached color.

“I’m fine, Mom. I promise. The bullet passed through my arm. No permanent harm done. And I’ll explain everything I know about the shooting, which isn’t much, in a few minutes. Anyway, I was taken to the hospital, and when Mike went to find Sam, he had Cole wait outside the cubicle where they were treating me. Cole heard the doctor mention I was pregnant. That’s how he found out.”

“Good Lord, I don’t know what to react to first.”

Erin winced. “How about you let me finish.”

Her mother’s eyes opened wide. “There’s more?”

“Not too much. Cole and Mike argued over who would take me from the hospital. I insisted that I was going home. Cole said he was going with me. Mike wanted me to have round-the-clock protection and finally agreed to Cole staying with me, which I thought was ridiculous, since I figured it was a random shooting.”

“It wasn’t?” Her mother’s voice took on a harsh, yet worried, tone.

Erin shrugged. “It doesn’t look like it.” She told her mother about the roadkill delivery to her front door. “In the meantime, Cole told me that Mike and Sam have a lead, thanks to the ballistics on the gun. But now they’re not sure the two things are related, because a shooting is major and roadkill is a de-escalation. It doesn’t make sense. Plus the note with the animal said, ‘Leave him alone,’ and that’s just odd.”

Ella stood and began pacing the kitchen. “First, you should have called me.”

Erin exhaled long and hard, having expected this. “You were on a cruise. You’d just gone through a hellish year and you deserved the time away with Dad. Besides, you’re here now.”

“And not a minute too soon. You need your mother.” Ella held out her arms and Erin gratefully went back into her mom’s embrace. Her familiar scent eased the anxiety Erin had been living with for so long.

“Now, tell me what’s going on with you and Cole Sanders.”

Erin’s face heated at the mention of Cole’s name, while her body still reacted to the mere thought of him.

“I see,” Ella said thoughtfully.

Knowing her mother, she probably did. “He said he can’t make promises for the future beyond him taking care of both me and the baby. We haven’t defined anything, but I’m guessing that’s financial. And he’ll want to see his child when he’s home between jobs.” Erin crossed her arms in a comforting self-supplied hug.

Ella made a humming sound while she pursed her lips in thought. “It’s more than Rex gave me,” Ella said, speaking of Mike’s biological father.

Erin swallowed hard. “The thing is, his actions are so opposite from his words. He’s decided he’s in charge of everything, beyond the bodyguard thing. He cooks meals. He makes sure the fridge is stocked and that I eat well. He was insulted I didn’t ask him to come to my monthly doctor’s appointment and insisted he’d be there for the rest of them. And he had a jealous fit when Evan Carmichael reminded me about the event that we’re supposed to attend together on Saturday night.”

Her mother’s eyes opened wide. “Not the actions of a disinterested man.”

Erin shook her head. “He holds himself back from me emotionally. And he’s definitely scarred by how Jed treated him growing up. How he still treats him. My God, Mom, it was awful.” And she was pretty sure Cole hadn’t been in touch with Jed since he’d moved in with her.

With a sigh, her mother lowered herself back into her seat. “Jed’s a hard man. Very set in his beliefs and in his ways.” She shook her head. “He had little patience for a child, let alone an independent one with a mind of his own like Cole was. They butted heads so often I wasn’t surprised Cole went out looking for trouble when he was younger.”

“That’s so sad.” She couldn’t imagine growing up without a loving father. “I guess I was too young to realize how bad things were.”

“As deputy police chief, Jed was loyal and good to your father, and our friendship stemmed from there. We tried to tell him the damage he was doing in his private life, but he didn’t listen. To be honest, I was glad when Olivia took Cole and left Serendipity. But I didn’t realize how much he’d already hurt Cole by then.” Ella paused. “Does Jed know about the baby?”

Erin shook her head. “I’m sure Cole’s avoiding that conversation until the last possible moment. He doesn’t need to hear what a crappy father he’ll make from the man who still makes digs every chance he gets.”

Her mother’s face showed her disappointment. “I’ll have your father talk to him.”

“No. We should all mind our own business and let Cole deal with Jed. Speaking of fathers, I think Mike and Sam might be telling Dad everything.” Erin placed her hand over her belly.

“We’re not going to judge you, honey. Especially not me. That would be like the pot calling the kettle black. I just want to know if you’re happy.”

Erin looked into her mother’s wise eyes. “I was shocked. Now I’m scared. I’m excited too.” She drew a deep breath. “I’m on my way to being happy, but . . .”

“What is it?” her mother asked.

“Cole. I want to try and see if anything that’s between us can be real. So far it’s just pieces of a relationship that he’s unwilling to string together into something that makes sense. It’s like, I can feel how right we could be, and then
bam
, it’s gone.” Erin’s chest squeezed tight.

“I’m sure he’s scared, just like you are.”

“I know. But it’s more than that. He’s alluded to the fact that someone like me deserves better. More than he can give. But nobody could treat me better than he does, and that’s without emotional commitment or involvement.”

“Oh, honey, you’re in love with him?” Ella asked.

Erin sniffed, her throat full. “I can’t know that yet, but I think I could be.” If he opened himself more. If he could accept that he was meant to share in life, not just live undercover. “But I’m afraid he’ll never give us a chance.”

“Honey . . .”

Before Ella could finish, Mike strode into the room. “Sorry. I couldn’t help overhearing. I came to see if you were ready to join us yet.”

Erin shook her head, annoyed by the interruption. “In a few minutes.”

“Can I say something before I go?” Mike asked.

“Can I stop you?”

He settled into a chair next to her. “Umm . . . I might have overstepped and hurt the situation between you and Cole.”

Erin narrowed her gaze. “What did you do?”

“Michael?” Ella asked, her voice low.

“Back when you were shot? I confronted him at the hospital. I said a few things and he took them to mean I thought he wasn’t good enough for you.”

“And you didn’t correct him?” Erin asked, her voice rising.

Mike shook his head. “I agreed with him”—he held up his hands—“but you have to understand I’d just found out you were pregnant. And you’d just been shot.” To his credit, her brother appeared embarrassed, but he sure hadn’t bothered to fix things either.

“It’s not like you’ve done anything to make him feel better about things since, so cut it with the puppy dog eyes. I’m not buying the whole contrite act.”

“Erin, Michael, stop. What’s done is done. But Michael, you of all people know what it’s like to doubt yourself. What were you thinking, talking to Cole that way?” Ella asked, sounding disappointed in her son.

“I’ve been worrying about Erin.”

Erin rose to her feet. “Well, if you care that much, you should have been listening to me the last few weeks when I asked you to ease up on Cole. This is my life, and whatever happens, it’s up to me.”

He exhaled hard. “I know. Cara said the same thing on the way over here.”

Erin knew how fragile Cole’s psyche was in general, thanks to Jed. Undercover work suited him, yes, but it also let him avoid reality and people who could love and care about him.

Erin had decided to make her move with Cole tonight, back home. After hearing what Mike had done, she decided any move she made had to be now.

And it had to be public. “Take me to Joe’s,” she said to Mike.

He raised an eyebrow. “We all just got here.”

Erin glanced at her mother, who waved her away with a smile on her face. “Go do what you have to do. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Don’t you want to talk to Dad before you go?” Mike asked Erin. “He’s barely got the gist of what’s going on with you.”

“I’ll handle Simon,” Ella said. “Michael, take your sister and stay out of the way,” she said in the authoritative voice she’d used on them as children.

Despite how upset she was, Erin couldn’t help but laugh.

“And keep my baby safe,” Ella said sternly.

“Yes, Mom.” Mike kissed Ella’s cheek.

Of course, it took longer than Erin would have liked to get out of her parents’ house. Simon insisted on talking to her about stalker safety and assuring her he would be there for her and the baby, no judgment. The same way he’d been there for Ella when she’d been pregnant so many years ago. Simon was a good and decent man, and Erin was lucky to have him as her father. She just wished Cole had been as fortunate.

Finally, Sam stayed behind with their parents, while Mike, Cara, and Erin headed for Mike’s truck for the short ride to town. As they pulled up to Joe’s, Mike turned to Erin in the backseat.

“You do realize Cole’s got more issues than just the things I said to him, right?” he asked.

“Erin’s a grown woman,” Cara reminded Mike. “Give her the time and space to handle things without always having to stick your nose into her life.”

Erin bit the inside of her cheek. She loved how Cara took her husband in hand.

“Thank you,” she said to her sister-in-law. “Mike, yes, I know. And I believe I can handle everything about Cole.” She just needed to make sure he wanted to be handled.

Because if she went all out only to discover Cole really didn’t desire anything to do with settling in Serendipity, with her—in whatever capacity they worked out between them—Erin couldn’t change his mind.

Still, she wouldn’t know unless she tried. Tonight, she decided, it was time to do just that.

Cole had forgotten Wednesday night was Ladies’
Night, which meant it wasn’t a quiet evening at Joe’s. Instead, Cole took in the various groups of people, some of whom he remembered well, some he merely recognized, and others too young for him to know at all.

He spent some time shooting the shit with Joe. The other man’s wife, Annie, friendly since Cole had moved in, tried chatting, and though Cole gave it his best shot, he wasn’t in the mood for small talk that inevitably led to the subject of Erin’s shooting and Cole playing bodyguard. Annie seemed perceptive and backed off, which left Cole as he usually was. Alone.

He nursed a beer for most of the night, trying unsuccessfully not to brood over things he couldn’t change. He didn’t blame Erin for not wanting him with her when she told her parents—and did he really want to put himself through that kind of torture? Still, sooner or later he’d have to face Simon, a man Cole had always respected, who’d now look at him with disgust and disappointment. He was used to it from his own father and from ignorant people who didn’t know him at all, but it would bother Cole coming from Erin’s father.

And he couldn’t forget the look on her face when she’d given him her reason for going alone.
Since we’re not a couple, this is something I need to do on my own.

So hurt. And so very brave, pretending everything in her world was okay. He ran a hand over his burning eyes and glanced around the crowded bar, watching people dance to music from an old-fashioned jukebox.

Time crept by slowly.

A glance at his watch told him he still had a good stretch before he expected Erin to call to meet her back at the house, so he was surprised when he heard her voice. Sure he was imagining things, he turned to see Erin walk up to him, her eyes blazing with determination—over what, he hadn’t a clue. She was followed closely by Mike and Cara.

Mike stepped around his sister. “Got a minute?” He spoke before she could.

Erin narrowed her gaze. “You were just my ride. I don’t need you opening your big mouth any further.”

Uh-oh. Looks like brother and sister had had an argument.

“Mike, let’s go dance.” Cara tugged at her husband’s arm.

“In a second.” Mike turned to Cole. “Look, what I said at the hospital after Erin was shot? And the way I’ve acted since? I was out of line. Everything going on is between you two. Whatever happens, I won’t get in the way.”

Cole narrowed his gaze, wondering what brought on the apology, other than maybe Erin’s wrath over her brother’s feelings about him. “I don’t blame you for looking out for her.”

“We were friends a long time ago. Maybe when things settle, we could . . . I don’t know. Have drinks?”

Cole wasn’t one to hold a grudge. Especially when the other man had a right to his feelings. “Sure.” He held out his hand and Mike shook it.

“One more thing before I go. We ran down the trail on the gun that was used in the shooting.”

“Yeah?” Cole sat up straighter in his seat. “What’d you find out?”

“The weapon was stolen from the legal owner and used in a robbery last year. Guy’s out on parole. Says he sold the gun to a guy named John Brass, a drug addict who’d do anything to get cash for a fix.”

“Did they find him?”

Mike nodded. “So high it didn’t take long for him to confess to the shooting. Says a brunette hired him. She didn’t say why and he didn’t ask. Idiot didn’t get a name, either. She just showed him a picture of Erin and told him where to find her.”

Erin’s eyes opened wide.

Sensing her distress, Cole acted without thinking. He snagged her hand and pulled her close. “Did your people get a look at the photograph?”

“Didn’t have it anymore.”

“Shit. Where’s this Brass guy now?” Cole asked.

“Detoxing in a Bronx jail cell. They’ll take another crack at him in a few days, but I have a feeling we got all we could from him.” Mike scowled, his frustration evident.

“So whoever this woman is, she’s still out there.” Erin shivered.

Cole slid his hand up her shirt, along the soft skin of her back. From where she stood, with her back to her brother, nobody could see the private touch, which eased her trembling and pleased him. When she didn’t pull away, he was even more thrilled.

“We’ll get her. I promise you that,” Mike swore to his sister.

Erin nodded. “I believe you.”

Whatever problems the siblings had been having, it was obvious Erin trusted her brother. A part of him wished for that same faith, even as he knew he’d never deserve it.

“You okay for me to go?” Mike asked.

“I’m with Cole. I’ll be fine.” She glanced back at him, her eyes startling in their certainty.

Mike hesitated, as if he wanted to add something, when Cara stepped in. “I’m stealing my husband now.” She grabbed Mike’s hand and led him to the dance floor.

Erin waited a beat before turning to face Cole.

“So what brings you here? I thought you were having dinner with your family.”

When she’d bolted out of her parents’ house, she hadn’t had a plan. She only knew she needed to see him. Now she was here—and she still didn’t have one, so she fell back on her old standby.

Honesty. “I didn’t like how we left things earlier and I wanted to see you.”

He raised an eyebrow. “You broke up a family gathering for me?”

A hint of . . . vulnerability mixed with pleasure flashed across his handsome face.

No more dancing around the issue. Erin drew a deep breath and nodded. “I did.”

He beckoned with a crook of his finger. “Come here.”

She stepped into the V of his legs, and without caring who was looking, she looped her arms around his neck.

His eyes opened wide. “What are you—”

“Shut up,” Erin said, and she leaned in close and kissed him full on the lips.

He stiffened at first, not, she knew, from lack of desire, but from shock that they were in a public place.
Well, tough luck,
she thought, beginning phase one of her suddenly formed plan: getting Cole Sanders used to being a part of her life.

Determined, she ran her tongue over the seam of his lips. With a groan, his hands gripped her waist and he kissed her back with a passion that matched her own.

When they parted, Erin felt pleased with herself . . . until she looked into his wary eyes. “What’s going on?”

“I just don’t see a reason to hide what’s happening between us. I mean, it’ll be obvious soon enough.” She patted her stomach.

“We agreed—”

“About the future, yes, I know. But wasn’t it you who said if I was in your bed, I wouldn’t be dating anyone else?” She fluttered her eyelashes in a not-so-innocent gesture.

A muscle ticked in his jaw. “You haven’t been in my bed the last few nights.”

“But I plan to be from now on.”

His eyes darkened, desire blazing in the inky depths. “You want people to know about us.”

“Yep. Whatever it is, for as long as it lasts—” She wouldn’t tell him what she really hoped for. That would send him running. But to acclimate him to her Serendipity life, she needed him on board. “Yes. I want to be able to go out. To act on impulse. And when it’s over, we’ll figure out our parenting plan and go from there. Are you okay with that?” she asked, her tone deliberately challenging.

He shook his head and her stomach flipped over, disappointment filling her. She hadn’t expected him to turn her down, not when everyone would know he was her baby’s father eventually anyway.

“Fine. Forget it.” She whipped around before he could catch a glimpse of her tear-filled eyes.

He grabbed her wrist. “Whoa. You didn’t let me finish.”

She hesitated before turning back.

“I shook my head because you never cease to surprise me, challenge me, and take me off guard.”

She swallowed hard. “Is that a good thing?”

An unexpected grin curved his lips. “I’m still working that out. But as to your question? I may live to regret this, but yeah. I’m in.”

Her eyes opened wide. “You are? Why?”

He let out a laugh that had people around them staring. “Because only an idiot would turn down what you’re offering.”

“Yeah?” she asked with what she figured had to be a goofy smile on her face.

“Yeah.” He brushed her hair off her cheek in a tender gesture that had her eyes burning all over again.

“Want to dance?” she asked.

He nodded.

A few minutes later, he’d settled up with Joe, and Erin found herself on the dance floor, surrounded by a crush of people, Cole’s hard body pressed deliciously against hers while a slow, old Air Supply song crooned from the jukebox. Cole held her tight, her curves molded against his harder muscular form. She lay her head on his shoulder and let herself pretend, just for a moment, that everything she was feeling was real.

Permanent.

That this tough man with his protective alpha ways could actually come to care for her just as she was beginning to care for him. And maybe he could, but she understood on a pragmatic level that caring didn’t mean he’d trust her to accept or live his kind of life—because he’d been ingrained with the belief that he wasn’t worth it.

The next hour passed in a blur of stares and cautious conversation from friends and acquaintances of Erin’s who were obviously surprised by the public display of affection between her and Cole. Erin played it cool—and real—introducing Cole with an easy, “You remember Cole Sanders, don’t you?” and letting them draw their own conclusions about them together based on the way they danced and the way she stayed by his side. She hoped to acclimate the people of Serendipity to Cole and vice versa. Everyone seemed polite, even with Cole acting as wary as she would have expected, leaving Erin satisfied with her night’s work.

“Okay, we played things your way. Now it’s my turn.” Cole’s low growl reverberated throughout her body, already primed from dancing so close to him. “Let’s go home.”

• • •

Cole was a man of few words to begin with, so when
Erin walked into Joe’s, swung her arm around his neck and kissed him senseless, in front of Joe and all of Serendipity, she stunned him into silence.

And then she seduced him with her mouth and her words. She wanted to be in his bed? He had no problem taking her there. Not long after leaving Joe’s, they were back at Erin’s. He did a quick perimeter check and a sweep of the house before opening her car door, scooping her into his arms, and carrying her through the house and upstairs to her bedroom.

Cole lowered her to the bed. He stripped off his clothes until he was completely nude. It was easy enough to rid her of a skirt that was partially open anyway, before removing the rest of her outfit. Soon, he had her where he wanted her, in nothing but a flimsy pair of panties and a sexy bra with her lush cleavage spilling over the lace cups, staring up at him with pure desire in her hazel-green eyes.

As hard as it was to accept what the idea of the pregnancy meant, the future it tied him to whether he’d planned it or not, the changes in her body cemented him in reality. Right now, when he looked down at her, he didn’t feel panic but rather tenderness. He wasn’t experiencing dread but rather a pure bolt of desire.

He bent to ease one bra strap off her shoulder, but instead of reaching for the flimsy material, he found his hand covering her stomach, gently caressing the slight swell there now. Eyes wide, Erin watched him, wonder and awe in her gaze. He knew the feeling—was experiencing it himself—of knowing it was
his
baby inside her. And it made him want her even more.

He planned to go slow, to taste every last inch of her exposed skin, until she was a writhing mass of need.

“How much longer are you going to make me wait?” she asked in a husky voice. “I mean, I was happy to let you do your control thing, but if you’re not going to move, I suppose I should take over.” A wicked gleam lit her gaze and suddenly he wanted nothing more than to change places.

He flipped over and braced his hands behind his head. “Go for it.”

Erin grinned. She looked her fill of his gorgeous body, his olive skin appearing tan, a dark sprinkling of hair on his chest running down his abdomen to the thatch of hair between his thighs. His thick, pulsing erection called to her, and she couldn’t wait to touch.

So she did, wrapping her hand around his straining shaft and pumping her hand up and down until a drop of moisture pooled at the head. She licked her lips and moaned.

“Like what you see?” he asked in a hoarse voice.

“I most certainly do.” She continued to slide her hand back and forth, as she lowered her mouth and took him inside, tasting his unique flavor—salt and musk, his erection so hot and smooth as it passed her lips and glided through her mouth.

She’d loved doing this to him before, had reveled in the power she possessed to bring this big, strong man to a mind-blowing orgasm. Her, Erin Marsden, the good girl. The one who never before loved sex the way she did with him. More important, she’d never enjoyed giving to a man the way she did with him, like his gratification meant as much if not more than her own. Because giving him pleasure did the same for her.

She swirled her tongue over the sensitive head, down his shaft, then back up again. He thrust his hips, and she accepted all of him, would give whatever he needed or even demanded.

She was shocked when he reached down and lifted her off him, pulling her up his prone body.

“Hey! I was busy,” she said, teasing him.

He kissed her damp lips. “I am not coming unless I’m inside you.”

“You would have been.” She chuckled, a sound he cut off by sealing his lips over hers.

He kissed her long and hard, telling her with his mouth and his roaming hands how much he wanted her. Erin didn’t need the words, she just needed him. Even on top, she handed back the reins, taking direction as he pushed at her hips until she was poised over his waiting erection.

She aligned their bodies and started a slow downward glide. At the same time, he cupped her breasts in his hands and fondled her nipples, toying with them together. Every pinch and pull went straight to her core, and she thrust downward, engulfing him completely.