One Simple Step (Journey Series) (26 page)

I turned to walk back in the direction I came from and that’s when I heard his voice. This time it was closer, so I picked up my pace. “Mom?”

I turned the corner leading back out into the living room, and he stepped into the hallway at the same time. “Ally?” he called out, confusion lacing his voice.

I stopped when he said my name, but couldn’t make my body turn around. It felt like I was stuck in quicksand and my body couldn’t move.

“Ally,” he repeated my name, like he couldn’t believe I was actually here. Neither could I.

“Hey, Nick.” I turned around, and gave him a small wave. “How’s it going?” I rocked back on my feet, and gave myself a mental face palm.
How’s it going,
really, Ally? What you should be doing is just punching him in that stupid pretty face of his.
That’s
what you should be doing.

I snapped myself back to reality when he cleared his throat loudly, and took a step closer, rubbing a hand over his face. “I can’t believe you’re really here. I’ve thought about when I would see you again at least a million times, but I never thought it would be like this.” His lips twisted into a smirk, and I caught a flash of those damn dimples.

I forced my eyes away from his face quickly. “Yeah, well, this was a mistake. I should leave.”

“Ally, don’t—” He was cut off by the sound of a baby crying and my eyes snapped to his. He let out a groan, squeezing his eyes shut before he held up a finger to me. “I’ll be right back, please don’t leave.”

I gave one nod of my head, which seemed to please him and he headed back towards the extra bedroom. I dropped down on the couch when really my feet wanted to head right out the door. He seemed…different somehow. A little exhausted looking, but different in another way, too. The baby cry had really thrown me off, and I think that’s why I stayed.

Nick came back out, walked into the kitchen with a baby cradled in one arm, and began to make a bottle at the sink. I watched his every move, as he measured out the formula, and got the water to the temperature that he liked. The baby wasn’t full-blown crying anymore, but was letting out that sweet baby whimper as he got the bottle ready.

“So,” he started as he sat down in the recliner across from me and began feeding the baby her bottle. I at least could tell it was a girl since she was decked out in everything pink. It almost made me laugh, seeing Nick surrounded by all of that pink. Almost.

I really needed to pinch myself because I felt like I was in some sort of twilight zone or something.

“So,” I repeated back to him nervously, and wiped my sweaty hands on my knees.

“This is a little awkward, right?” He grabbed up a burp cloth that had been laying on the end table, and dabbed at the baby’s chin before setting her on his shoulder to burp her.

“Um…just a little. Care to explain?” I waved my hands at him and the baby, and he groaned loudly, raking his free hand through his hair.

“Ally, I just didn’t know how to…I meant to tell you...” He pursed his lips like he was trying to gather the right words, and he started again, pointing down to the baby. “This is my daughter.”

I had a pretty good feeling that’s what he was going to say, but it didn’t make actually hearing it any easier. I felt my throat close up just as my heart plummeted down into my stomach, and I stared back at him open-mouthed, not sure what exactly to say after hearing something like that. A million different thoughts were running through my head at what exactly that meant. Yeah, she was his daughter, but did that mean...

“Ally, I never cheated on you, I swear. And if you’re even questioning it, just figure out the timeline, it wouldn’t have been possible. Kara just didn’t tell me she was pregnant until after I met you.”

I sucked in a breath at the mention of Kara, and I snapped my head around, forgetting up until this point that I had been worried about a confrontation with her.

“Don’t worry, she’s not here. Hasn’t been for a while.”

I snapped my head back to his, and saw him smile gently at the baby as he continued to feed her. I could see the love he had for her just radiating off of him. “What do you mean? Where has she been?”

He shook his head. “No clue, I woke up one morning, and she was gone. She left a note, saying she couldn’t handle things anymore, and I was on my own. I got some papers delivered the next day for sole custody.”

“Wow.” I couldn’t imagine just leaving my child, whether it was with her dad or not. The one time that I had met Kara hadn’t been the best impression, but I couldn’t believe she would just leave her baby like that. She was a bitch with a capital
B.

“Yeah, I guess if I thought about it, I could kind of see it coming, but if she was going to do it, I wish she would’ve signed custody over to me before Ariel was even born.”

My eyebrows shot up at the mention of his daughter’s name. Did he really…no, it must just be a coincidence. I had always loved the nickname he had given me, but naming his daughter Ariel because of me didn’t seem like a possibility.

“Well, I’m sorry you’ve been having to do this alone. You seem like you’re handling it pretty well.”

“Yeah, I think I’m getting the hang of it. I took a little bit of time off from work, but I’m going back soon so I’ll have to figure all of that out.” He pulled the empty bottle out of Ariel’s mouth, and ran a finger lightly over her cheek; she didn’t flinch once in her deep sleep. “Let me go lay her down.”

I stood up quickly. “I think I should really get going.”

“Stay, please?” he asked quietly. My eyes darted to the sleeping baby in his arms, and I nodded my head once. He was back before I even realized, and grabbed onto my hand to tug me down onto the couch to sit next to him. His touch sent all sorts of memories rushing through my head, and I quickly pulled my hand away.

“Ally—” he started, and I put up a hand to stop him.

“Just tell me one thing, Nick. Why didn’t you tell me that all of this was going on?”

“I wish I would’ve, Ally. Trust me. I was hoping that things had played out differently. When Kara first told me about the baby, she wanted me to sign adoption papers, not even have a chance to be in her life.” He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut. “I can’t even imagine not being a part of her life.”

I awkwardly patted his knee, trying to give him some kind of comfort and he gave me a small smile. “So, I thought about it a lot, and I finally told her no, that I was going to do this by myself. The guy she was with at the time didn’t want a baby around that wasn’t his.”

“So, you just assumed I would be the same way?” I asked, quietly.

He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, Al. There were little things you would say every once in a while, and it sort of sounded like you didn’t want kids. So, I kept putting off telling you. And then Kara dropped the bombshell on me that she wanted to be a part of the baby’s life. I was thinking that we could work something out, some kind of agreement, but I felt like we needed to raise our daughter together, no matter how much I couldn’t stand her.”

I rolled my eyes. “Nick, do you realize how many single parents there are out there? You don’t always have to be the good guy.” I was hurt and touched at the same time by his line of thinking.

“Yeah, well, after everything that happened with you, I was definitely rethinking my decision. I couldn’t stand being apart from you, Al. Kara moved in here—”

“Kara moved in, here?” I pointed to the floor, and he nodded his head. “So, does that mean you guys were, like, back together?” I didn’t want to think about
that,
but I couldn’t help it.

“Never, Ally. I swear. I couldn’t even touch her. I wouldn’t.” I felt myself relax just a little. He looked sincere, and I think that I believed him, but really, it didn’t matter. “I was really thinking about coming to tell you the truth, and take things from there, but then, then she started to talk about what she would do if things didn’t work out between us. She was thinking about moving to California, and taking Ariel with her after she was born. I couldn’t let that happen. I had to think about my daughter first. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry for thinking about your daughter, Nick, that’s not your fault. The one to blame here is Kara.” I didn’t know it was possible, but I hated that girl even more. I disliked the word hate, but I had never felt it so strongly in my life as when it came to Kara.

His blue eyes lit up with something that resembled hope, and I squirmed in my seat. “Ally, I wanted to come to you so bad after that, but I needed to get all of my shit figured out, and get used to having a baby. I know I hurt you, but do you think we could just start fresh, wipe the slate clean? Please,” he added, his eyes pleading with me. I had to look away.

I had thought about this moment so many times. Would I let Nick back into my life if he wanted to? Could I forgive him for breaking my heart into a million pieces? Really, I didn’t think the opportunity would ever come. I just wish I had answered those questions in my head before now.

I took a deep breath, and looked straight in his eyes, knowing that I needed to be confident when I gave him my answer. I needed to be strong for myself, because what I was about to say was going to break me all over again. “I can’t, Nick. I’m sorry,” I added in a whisper.

I saw his whole body tense up, and he twisted towards me, his hands gripping my knees tightly. “Ally, what can I do to change your mind? Just give me something, please. Anything.”

“Nick, the answer’s still no.” I shook my head, trying to stop the tears that I could feel coming on.

“Is it because of
him
?” he bit out, and I could see his eyes darken with anger.

“Who?” I asked, confused. “Danny?”

“Danny?” he repeated, his eyebrows knitting together when he said his name. “Why in the hell would I be talking about Danny?” Obviously Danny had kept our friendship a secret from Nick, at least he had listened to me somewhat. “No, I mean Teddy. I figured you two ended up back together after...” His words dropped off, so I finished his thought for him

“You mean, after you broke up with me? You think I got back together with Teddy?” Honestly, it made me a little upset that Nick thought I would just go running back to Teddy after he broke things off. Did he really not have any faith in me as a person? I wasn’t a doormat.

Did all men think alike or something?

After Nick broke up with me, it’s like Teddy had gotten some kind of instant notification because he showed up on my doorstep the next morning. I was a mess, my eyes were puffy and red from the crying that I had tried so hard not to do, but couldn’t help. My hair probably looked like a giant rats’ nest on top of my head, and I was still wearing Nick’s shirt that I had put on the night before.

Teddy did a double take when I pulled the door open and waved him in.

“What’s going on, Al?” he asked with a look of concern on his face as he collapsed onto the couch.

“Teddy,” I huffed, really not wanting to talk to him about this but I knew he would bother me until I told him what was wrong. “Nick, my boyfriend…ex-boyfriend, he broke up with me, apparently things weren’t working out.” I rolled my eyes to the ceiling, still trying to comprehend that one. I don’t think I would ever really understand it.

“I’m sorry, Al.” I looked up, and he really did look genuinely sorry. He stood up from where he had been sitting and came to stand in front of me. “But now that things are over, maybe you’ll be willing to give us another chance?”

I snorted loudly. “Wow, Teddy. Really?” I stood up quickly, knocking into him roughly. “I am so sick of men and their shit.” I pushed against his shoulder, and his brown eyes widened.

“What the hell, Ally?”

“I don’t know why you think you can just keep coming back into my life over and over again. I tried to be nice about it, Teddy, I really did, but apparently, you aren’t getting the picture. You ruined our marriage, the second I caught you banging that bleach-headed slut in our bed. There is no forgetting that, ever. So please, if you’re ever going to do anything for me again, just leave me alone. That’s all I need from you. That’s all I need, Teddy.” I pushed him again towards the direction of the door, and he threw up his hands, his brown eyes giving me a defeated look.

“Okay, Ally,” he mumbled. “I promise, this is the last time you’ll have to deal with me.”

And it had been so far. Hopefully he stuck to his word this time. Last I read in some trashy tabloid magazine, he was in a relationship with the newest model to grace the cover of Sports Illustrated. Just his type. I really did hope things worked out for him.

Nick looked lost for words as I snapped back to reality and he raked his hands through his hair again, squeezing his eyes shut. I should’ve taken that opportunity to just leave. I knew if I stayed here much longer, I might give in. It was a definite possibility. Those blue eyes could do crazy things to me with just one look.

He silently brushed his thumb across my cheek, causing my whole body to shiver at the simple touch. I felt myself lean into it, and I knew I was in so much trouble, my body betraying me like this.

Chapter 27

Nick

To say I had been shocked to see Ally in my house was an understatement. I felt like I was in a dream when I came out of my bedroom, expecting to see my mom, who normally came over for her daily baby fix, and instead saw Ally. I’m pretty sure she was hoping I hadn’t seen her, she looked like she was ready to bolt, but I couldn’t let her go. Not again.

After things ended with Ally, I couldn’t have been more miserable, everyone could tell, including Kara. At first, she tried to make things work between the two of us, like we were an actual couple. I tried, I really did, but I just couldn’t. So, instead, I just tried to be friends with her. I figured if we could at least get along, she would stay, and not take Ariel away from me. I couldn’t let that happen.