Read No Time for Goodbyes Online
Authors: Andaleeb Wajid
I
DON'T KNOW THIS
man at all. He's old and his eyes seem to be permanently squinting and he regards me in a strange manner. He's almost bald and the shape of his head is a little bit oblong. He's wearing a checked shirt and grey trousers and doesn't at all look like an eccentric inventor/photographer. An absent-minded professor maybe. Manoj is standing behind him and he gestures towards me.
âUmm ⦠this is Tamanna. She's the girl I told you about,' he says and his grandfather nods.
âSit,' he says in a gravelly voice and I comply immediately. He doesn't look very friendly and I'm glad Manoj is there.
âSo, how did you come here?' he asks, scratching the side of his head absently as he makes his way slowly towards one of the other chairs and sits down. Manoj looks around a little uncomfortably before sitting down.
âI don't know. I was in my house on the second floor. We have this room where we store all our old things. I found the photo and I just looked at it.'
âGo on. What happened after that?' his grandfather says.
âI came downstairs and realised everything was different,' and I went on to describe all the changes I had come across.
âAnd who did you say you were? What's your connection with that photo?' he asks. Manoj can't resist a smile at this as I explain to the old man that I am Suma's daughter.
He shakes his head in wonder and then turns to Manoj suddenly. âThis isn't some kind of trick you're playing on me?' he asks and Manoj turns red. It gives me the feeling that Manoj is renowned for pulling fast ones on everyone and he's considered a trickster.
âNo no! How could I have made all that up?' he says looking affronted now. His grandfather turns to face me again and I flush under his scrutiny.
âWhat's the future like?' he asks and I feel dismayed. Do I really want to get into this? How do they expect me to give them a pre-cap of three decades? I've just about lived a little more than half those many years.
I decide to ignore his question because suddenly, thinking of the future is depressing. No, what I mean is that to them, it might seem depressing if I tell them everything that has happened since 1982.
âHow can I go back?' I ask him instead. Manoj and he share a look and I get the feeling that this isn't good news. My suspicion is confirmed when he shrugs and runs his hand behind his head as though he's thinking.
âLook, I had no idea my experiment was successful. I need to look into everything again,' he says.
âHave you taken more pictures? Will they also allow you to travel through time?' I ask him. I note that Manoj is leaning forward eagerly.
The old man shakes his head. âI did take a few pictures with it but that was before I made the changes.'
âHow did you do it?' I ask him out of curiosity.
âIt's complicated. You need to have an understanding of Physics and light and shadows,' he says and I grimace.
âSee. Now Manoj here is really into Physics but he didn't believe me for a second when I told him what I was trying to accomplish. The only thing is that I was hoping to go into the future. Not have someone travel backwards in time.'
âBut you can figure out how to send me back into 2012 right?' I ask him, almost desperately. Suddenly the thought of staying here any longer than I need to is making me feel claustrophobic and I realise to my horror that I'm on the verge of tears. Manoj is looking at me strangely and then without any precursor, he gets me a glass of water from a room beyond the corridor.
I take the water gratefully but I'm unable to subdue the panicky feelings inside me. What if I'm stuck here for life? But that can't be possible! I'm supposed to be born fourteen years later.
âLook, Tamanna, Manoj and I will work out a way to send you back to your home. But until then â¦'
I look at Manoj, feeling distraught. âUntil then?' I ask him.
âYou might have to stay on in Suma's house,' he says, looking down at his fingers.
âBut how? I don't have clothes and my college admissions start soon and my mother will be worried and my father will call the police and I don't have money and I don't have clothes â¦' I realise I sound hysterical. When the two of them don't say anything, I go on, âWhat can I possibly do here? Can you at least tell me how long it will take?'
The old man shakes his head. âI don't know, Tamanna. I have to get started on it and even then I don't know if I will succeed.'
âHe will,' Manoj steps in quickly trying to make me feel better. âI'll help him and we'll figure out a way to get you back.'
I feel momentarily satisfied but it's not long before all the doubts start coming back.
âWhat will I tell Ajji? How long do you think they will put me up? And how come I'm staying in their house if I'm supposed to be
your
pen-pal? And what happened to the real pen-pal?' I ask him.
âOoh. Questions,' Manoj says, sounding more like himself, which is strange since I've never met him before last night.
His grandfather looks at the two of us and gets up and goes back to the room where presumably he will start working on a way to get me back. It's only Manoj and I in the room.
âAnswer me!' I glare at him and he puts his hands up in a peacemaker kind of gesture.
âOkay okay! Don't worry about Amma,' he says and adds, âYour Ajji I mean. She is the most wonderful woman I have met and she will let you stay for as long as you like. As for why they seemed to expect you there, can you see any girl from Australia staying in this house?' he asks, looking around.
âAlso, it didn't seem right somehow because there's no one else living here,' he says looking uncomfortable. âI asked Amma and she agreed instantly. And the real pen-pal cancelled her Bangalore trip because she fell down and broke her leg. She apparently tried calling me to tell me that she can't make it to Bangalore but our phone was dead. My grandfather forgot to pay the bill. I got it fixed just yesterday.'
I listen to him quietly but I'm not reassured. âWhat do you mean I can stay as long as I like in Ajji's house? It's not right! And what will I do here?'
Even as he's thinking this through, I have an idea. I'd been trying to convince mom to let me do a job in my summer vacations but she was rather ambivalent about it. On one hand she agreed it was important for me to know the importance of money but on the other hand, she's also so over-protective. She had told me that once dad gets back from his Singapore trip, she will ask him about it.
âDo you think you can help me get a job?' I ask, since I'm stuck here and everything.
âA
JOB
?' M
ANOJ REPEATS
in surprise. Even I'm surprised at what I've just asked him. Why on earth would I want to work in the 1980s? I don't know. It just seems like an exciting thing to do. Suddenly my meeting with Manoj's grandfather has changed how I view this whole situation. I'm stuck here. There's no question about that. There's also very little I can do about it. So why not make the best out of it?
âYeah,' I shrug. âI can't stay at Ajji's indefinitely and I need new clothes. I need money for that.'
âIt always comes back to clothes for you, huh?' Manoj marvels and I grin and then look down at what I'm wearing and grimace.
âThis is hideous. I cannot wear these clothes any longer,' I tell him.
âBut those are the kind of clothes you will find everywhere,' he reminds me and my face falls. That's true. It's not like I'm going to get a pair of Levis even if I earn any money.
Seeing me look deflated, Manoj shakes his head. âYou're a weird girl, Tamanna. Listen, don't worry about staying in Amma's house. She's your Ajji after all. As for money, I'll get you a job on one condition.'
âWhat?' I ask surprised.
âYou have to tell me something interesting about the future. Any event,' he says and my face closes up.
âIs it that bad?' he whispers, noting the expression on my face. âThe future. Is it so bad? You clam up every time I ask you.'
âYou're better off not knowing, Manoj, and it's not all bad. Yes, a lot of bad things do happen but I have hope,' I tell him, thinking of global warming and terrorist attacks. I don't want to ruin his vision of the future. He does not need to know about all that.
Manoj is silent for a short while before he nods. âBut it's so frustrating to have you right here and not know anything. Maybe you'll change your mind,' he says. I shrug.
âWhat kind of job did you have in mind?' he asks. I realise I have no idea.
âYou're no longer in school. So you must be in college right? How come you don't have any classes?' I ask him.
âIt's Sunday,' he tells me. âI do have college from tomorrow.'
âHow long was your pen-pal planning to stay? I mean, have you told Ajji anything?' I ask him. He smiles at me and shakes his head.
âShe was supposed to stay for a couple of days, but don't worry. I'll tell Amma that you've decided to extend your stay.'
âThe girls are on Christmas leave now. So it's December obviously,' I say thinking of his earlier question about the kind of job I wanted.
âYes, so?' he asks me cautiously.
âI'm sure there must be a lot of Christmas sales on in shops. Maybe I could get a job as an assistant somewhere?' I suggest, excited suddenly.
âChristmas sales?' he asks me as though I've come from another planet. My heart sinks. Obviously, it isn't a thing yet. Feeling suffocated suddenly, I get up and walk towards one of the windows. I wince when I see how grimy it is.
âWhat happened?' I hadn't realised Manoj too had got up and was standing behind me. I turn around and he takes a step back with an awkward smile.
âAre you okay?' he asks. I shake my head.
âYou tell me how you'd feel if you went back to the time your mom was a teenager,' the words slip out of my mouth before I realise his parents are dead. I feel like an idiot but before I can say âsorry' he just smiles.
âI'd do anything to see them again,' he says kindly.
âSo what kind of job can I do? I'm no good at anything,' I say, hoping to change the subject.
Manoj looks a little thoughtful. âYou like books right? How would you like to assist the librarian in my college?' he asks. My eyes light up. That sounds perfect. Then I remember that I have no clue about the books of this era. What if I don't like them at all? I don't have any choice, do I?
âI just hope your library isn't stocked with just Physics books,' I reply.
He throws his head back and laughs and in that instant, I'm happy. I've just about forgotten that I'm in the past talking to a guy who has never featured in my present. I've also managed to put behind the fact that my mom has a crush on him. I mean, she did end up getting married to my father, so obviously this crush whatever was not serious.
âWhat do you want to do today?' he asks me and I shake my head.
âI have no idea what you kids in the eighties do,' I tell him.
âWhy? What do you kids in 2012 do?' he challenges me.
âUmm ⦠go for a movie? Hang out at a mall? Or maybe just meet up with friends at a coffee shop? But if you ask me, on most Sundays I'm stuck before my computer watching re-runs of my favourite sitcoms.' I tell him. Understandably, he looks like I am talking in another language but he seems to pick up just one of the words and hangs on to it.
âComputer? You have one of your own?' he asks me, his eyes growing round in excitement. âMan I wish I could come to the future with you! How big is it? What does it do?' he asks me, sounding like a little boy.
âOh god! I can't explain all that!' I tell him. âBut you might be interested in this,' and I pull out my cell phone and give it to him. The battery is still at 50%.
âWow! What's this?' he asks, turning it around eagerly.
âIt's a cell phone. Also known as mobile phone,' I tell him. I thought everyone in the world knew about cell phones. Even people in remote, far flung places.
âIt's a phone?' he asks. I nod and swipe to unlock the screen and his eyes almost pop out when he sees the display.
âWow! So, you can take it with you anywhere and call people?' he asks.
âThat's just one of the things it does,' I tell him and we sit down so I can show him all the features. He's beyond stumped on seeing the camera. I hold the phone in front of him and click and then show it to him.
âSee?'
âWow!' his vocabulary seems to have been reduced to just one word. I let him fiddle around and I feel amused. He looks up at me sheepishly and grins.
âThe future seems to be awesome!' he says and is once again drawn back to the phone. Is it? It's the only world I know, but I'm not so sure if it's awesome. He finally hands it back to me and I realise he's looking thoughtful and then as though not sure of what he's thinking, he shakes his head.
âOkay, I didn't understand much of what you said earlier about what you kids do in 2012. But only one thing stood out. We watch movies too. We could go for a movie!' he says.
âOh great!' I clap my hands. âWhich one?'
âE.T!' he says, his eyes gleaming with excitement. I try hard to keep my face straight. I've only watched it like fifty times already, thanks to mom because it was her favourite movie. Now I know why.
I
T'S ALMOST EVENING AND
my day has been surprisingly well-spent. In fact, it has been better than most Sunday evenings in my present. I hadn't been lying to Manoj when I told him that all I do is watch sitcoms on my computer on Sunday evenings. Although I do read books as well, I'm kind of fixated in my room no matter what I do. Mom always gives me grief about not getting out often enough and by getting out, she doesn't mean the mall. I've never really understood what she meant until now.
The moment Manoj comes home with me and tells Ajji that we're going for a movie, Reena squeals and Vidya also smiles. It's only Suma who looks a bit huffy. I don't know what she was expecting but nevertheless, we watch Manoj leave to get tickets for the evening show and immediately start getting ready.
If I've always moaned about sharing living space with a sister, I wonder how my mother managed it with two. Especially Reena who doesn't budge from the mirror as she combs her hair, unties it, combs it again and then steps back to see the effect. Both Suma and I roll our eyes at her in exasperation and then catch each other mirroring our expressions. Suma seems to have let go of the hostility briefly and I realise I want her to like me.
Since my jeans and top have been washed, dried and folded and kept on my bed, I wonder if it will be okay if I wear them. But I remember the looks everyone at home gave me and I don't want to attract attention outside the house. At some level, I've decided that I am playing some kind of game. So getting into the spirit of it, I decide to wear one of Reena's dresses that she's kept out for me. Honestly, I would have liked to try Vidya's dresses because she's the only one wearing sober colours but she's the youngest of the three and there's no way I can fit into her clothes.
Reena's dress is orange. Mirinda Orange. Well, since no one is going to see me wearing it, what's the harm I think as I brush out my hair before the mirror once Reena relinquishes it. She offers me a lurid orange headband and instantly I'm taken back to Preity Zinta looking like apple pudding in one supposedly retro song in a Shahrukh Khan movie. She was wearing something similar. Shuddering, I refuse it and just braid my hair normally.
Manoj returns having bought the tickets and he gives me a smile when he sees that I'm totally trying to blend in with the girls. Only he and his grandfather know my secret and I'd like to keep it that way.
As we leave the house, waving goodbye to Ajji, I realise that despite knowing almost every scene of the movie, I'm excited. These kids have no idea what to expect from it and it would be great to see it from their point of view.
When we reach the main road, Manoj leads us to a bus stop and I stop short. Oh right! It had never occurred to me to ask how we would travel. And where were we going? I remember mom telling me how they never had multiplexes back in her day.
The bus is surprisingly empty and clean and nothing like the BMTC buses of my time. They're red and move slowly and languorously even though there isn't much traffic. We're an odd number of people so naturally one of us would be left alone. It just happens to be me and I don't really mind. I look across the aisle to where Vidya and Reena are sitting, Reena looking outside the bus and chattering excitedly while Vidya merely nods at her running commentary. In front of them, Suma and Manoj are seated and I look away because it feels a bit strange. My mom is glowing because she is sitting next to him although he is just chatting to her casually.
I look outside the window and breathe in the unpolluted air of the city, filling my lungs with it entirely. It feels so good to be outside the house! Mom always says that I am unsocial because I hate visiting people or just going out. But without the constant need to check Facebook or send texts to my friends I have so much free time. I actually feel free.
I'm a bit shocked when the bus stops at MG Road and we all get down. On one side, the shops are there, just not as flashy and shiny as they are in 2012. On the other side of the road, there's a lovely cover of trees all along it. It looks so pretty that I'm a bit speechless. How could they have cut it all off for the Metro?
Manoj is looking at me strangely and when the others are walking ahead, he slows down and asks me, âAre you okay?'
I nod because I don't want to tell him that this vision of MG Road will be reduced to rubble some fifteen years later.
âYou're hiding something from me,' he says and I turn to him, a little angry and sad. I hardly know him so how can I
hide
anything.
âStop it Manoj. Stop asking me things about the future. You won't like it,' I tell him. The others have stopped and are looking at us curiously.
âHow do you know?' he shrugs and looks angry too.
âThe movie will start now,' I tell him, hoping to change the subject. He looks around impatiently and I realise that we're near the theatre already. It's called Plaza and looks nothing like what theatres look like in my day.
There are people milling outside and reluctantly Manoj moves towards the entrance where we show the tickets and go inside. I look at the ticket in my hand and do a double take when I see the price.
It's
5.90. Unbelievable. I don't say anything as I'm shuffled from behind by the others and we quickly make our way to the balcony. Suma and the others are impressed.
âLast time you made us sit in the lower rows, Manoj,' Suma says, raising her eyebrows as we enter the semi-dark auditorium.
âSo?' Manoj's voice comes from behind me.
Suma is shifting sideways across the seats and finally finds her number and sits down. I sit down next to her and realise that the person next to me is Manoj. Reena and Vidya are on his left.
âSo, how come you're spending so much suddenly?' Suma continues the conversation. I lean back in the seat so they can talk without my face coming in the middle but Manoj doesn't say anything.
âHe's trying to impress you,' Suma whispers loudly and I flush a deep red. Thank god it's almost dark and I don't need to go out of my way to avoid looking at Manoj. He seems embarrassed as well because he mutters, âShut up'. The auditorium is tiny and is soon filled to maximum capacity. The lights go off and the familiar movie starts.
I smile to myself, thinking that if this is a dream, it is a darn good one at that.