MisStaked (47 page)

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Authors: J. Morgan

BOOK: MisStaked
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Leopold inched further behind Breathred as Luna took a step toward them. Not that he was afraid, but the girl did look quite upset, so no need to take chances. The Canadian reached for her, but she swept away his arm, the force of the blow staggering him back. Leopold wasn't sure but thought girls her size weren't supposed to toss men around like that, unless Canadians weren't as tough as their reputations reputed.

He was about to point the observation out when he noticed the girl didn't look quite right. She didn't even look human, to be perfectly honest. Leopold was ready to think an outbreak of the premenstrual syndrome affected the women in the area when it dawned on him perhaps the girl wasn't human to begin with. Hair growing everywhere suddenly was a dead giveaway. After a few minutes she looked nothing close to human. The girl was something different. If anything, she looked like a giant Schnauzer.

At least he wasn't the only one shocked. Breathred ceased struggling to get away. Leopold guessed the virgin was in shock after seeing his girlfriend turning into a Great Dane. The boy shouldn't be all too surprised. Leopold hadn't known her all that long and had already figured out she was a bitch. Now the outside just matched the inside.

Leopold was old enough to know what he was seeing. He had never seen one before, but this creature could only be a Dushato. While vampires were children of the spirit world, the Dushato were creatures of the earth. That being the case, the two races had been sworn enemies since time began, or for as long as he knew. The vampire had long thought the creatures were nothing more than a myth the elders used to frighten newly-dead vampires. Seeing this one, he knew his assumptions were not the case.

The Dushato's existence was not as shocking as who the Dushato was. The girl had hidden her origin well. Leopold had never suspected. As the girl approached, he tried to remember the Dushato's weaknesses. He couldn't think of any off hand, at least none that didn't mirror his own. They really were opposite sides of the same coin. If it might kill her, he knew it would surely kill him. It was the main reason why the two peoples tended to avoid each other. Avoided each other so well Leopold hadn't even seen one in his three hundred some-odd years of existence. Well, he was making up for the slight now, wasn't he?

So, what should he do about it? He wasn't about to hand Petrifunck over to her. Virgins were hard to come by, and you didn't go throwing them away once you got one. It was like throwing out the chamberpot before the indoor plumbing was hooked up.

"Vampire, let my man go,” Luna growled.

Leopold could only watch as she made her way toward him with slow and measured steps, every muscle tensed and ready.

Leopold, like Breathred, was slow to realize he no longer had a hand on the man in question. The vampire hastily reached out and grabbed Breathred, before the man could run off.

"Why is the big doggie talking with Luna's voice?” Breathred asked, but Leopold chose to ignore him. He had bigger problems to deal with at the moment than a confused virgin.

"I don't think so, Dushato,” Leopold said, regaining some of the confidence he had lost upon seeing her transformation.

"Give him to me before I rip you apart.” Luna snarled. “Blood Drinker, you're holding my mate. Do you have any idea who you're dealing with? I'm a child of Coyote, not some pampered Pomeranian. Give me what I want or by God you will die."

"Nothing has changed. If you try to take him, I will kill him,” Leopold stated, his voice telling her he wasn't lying.

Leopold watched the Dushato stop in mid-step, turning her nose into the air. He could tell she was sniffing for some sign of deceit on his part. Well she'd find none. He'd kill the virgin here and now, his finely decorated room be damned. She wouldn't risk the life of her mate with a foolish bid at saving him, especially if the attack meant his death. The scent of her frustration filled the air between them. Leopold smiled as her head snapped up and she let loose a howl that shook the entire clearing. When its last echoes faded into the night, she sank to the ground.

"Hey, I think that doggie is Luna!” Breathred exclaimed.

"Ya think?” Lewis said, right next to him. “Leopold, I didn't sign up to fight no werewolf. You de bad-ass. I'll be the chicken-shit in back. You can be the goofy white guy in front. Acting as the shield, dig?"

Brogan ran up to the girl, a look of surprise on his face. “Look, Darlin'. This werewolf thing you got going is impressive, but the vamps ain't buying."

"Yes, Girlie. We ain't buying, so peddle your doggie Avon somewhere else,” Leopold yelled.

"We can't just let them take Breathred,” Luna growled.

"Babe, you ain't in no shape to take them on and if we try they're holding all the cards. Do you want to see Breathred get killed?"

"No!"

"Then we got to let them walk. They'll slip up, I promise and we'll be there to kick their ass."

Leopold listened intently while the two finished the rest of the conversation in hushed whispers, growing irritated he could not make out a damn thing they were saying. The virgin was getting twitchy, which made it all the more harder to concentrate. Finally, the vampire just gave up. The Canadian was right. He was holding all the cards. The only thing they could do was let them go. All Leopold had to do was wait for them to come to their senses and realize it.

"Okay, Snaggletooth. Walk,” Brogan shouted.

"Finally, a voice of reason in this motley crew.” Leopold applauded.

"It doesn't mean I like it, Bub,” Brogan snarled.

"I'm sure you don't but there isn't a lot you can do about it. Kindly, put a leash on your little dog, so we can get about our business."

* * * *

Luna growled, but her heart wasn't in it. She lifted her head toward Breathred. A soft whine issued from her trembling snout. Breathred pulled Leopold to a stop just short of her. With the vampire's hand gripping his arm, Breathred fell to his knees and reached out and gently stroked her tousled head.

Luna looked up into his smiling face. “Don't look at me, Breathred. I didn't want you to see me like this."

"You're a doggie."

"I know what you must think. You hate me, don't you?” She broke down into a sobbing wreck.

"I like doggies,” Breathred swore. “But I love you."

"You do?” she asked, not believing her ears. She lifted her head until their eyes met. All she could see was love staring back at her. “But I should have told you."

Breathred stroked her tear-soaked cheek. “Yeah, but if you can put up with me, my weirdness—and let's not forget Stud—who am I to get all crazy just because you're a dog?"

"Werewolf."

"You're a werewolf? I thought you were a dog."

"Does what I am change anything?"

"Do I have to sniff your butt?” Breathred asked, a look of horror on his face.

"Not, if you don't want to."

"Then, I'm okay."

Before she could say anything else Breathred reached over and kissed her on the end of her muzzle, letting out a giggle. “The prickly hair tickles my lips. It's sorta like kissing my Aunt Sue, only you're not my Aunt Sue.” He grinned.

Leopold jerked him away, ending the moment. “Stop that! I will not have my virgin consorting with animals in my presence. What will the neighbors say?"

"Breathred!” Luna howled, as Leopold dragged him away.

"Down Fido,” Jessica laughed, stopping just outside of her reach.

"Bitch!"

"Well, if that ain't the pot calling the kettle black."

Luna lunged at her but the woman dodged easily out of her way. Before she could make another try, Easily took off sprinting after Leopold and the rest of her party. Luna fell back to the ground. Her paws pounded the ground in frustration, sending up a spray of snow and chunks of frozen earth.

"Don't worry, Luna. We'll get him back,” Brogan said.

She appreciated the fact he was trying to console her but it wasn't helping. “How can you be so positive? They've won. They have Breathred and D'brea's body."

"They might have won the battle, but the war ain't over with yet,” Brogan assured her.

"Yeah, yeah, but we got another little problem,” D'brea said.

Brogan and Luna turned around to see Stud standing alone in the center of the clearing. They looked around for the ghost but couldn't find her. They had almost given up, when Stud began to speak.

"Looks, like I've reached the edge of how far I can stay away from my body. Lucky for me, the chimp was nearby,” Stud said calmly, using D'brea's voice.

[Back to Table of Contents]

Fifty One

After doing this for a while, you'll realize there are just some things you don't want to know, or have to see.

"What's the matter? Never seen a woman in drag before?” D'brea/Stud said, as she hiked up her leg to scratch his butt.

"Stud?” Luna asked, the words sounding more human. The wolf side of her nature was giving way to the human. She didn't know if the shift in the status quo was a good thing, but was grateful for it. She couldn't prove it, but swore she was catching fleas from being close to Stud.

"He's in here somewhere, but damned if I know where,” D'brea answered, flippantly.

"Don't listen to the crazy-ass bitch! She's got me chained up in here,” Stud's voice shouted from the other side of his mouth.

"Shut up, you monkey! It was either this or I went back in my body,” D'brea told the chimp, which was weird because the two voices started fighting.

Two voices shouting at each other from the same mouth was a little more than Luna could take. “Both of you shut up."

The chimp's body snapped to attention.

"Now, D'brea. What have you done to Stud?” Luna demanded. “And Stud be quiet. I want to hear this from her, not you."

"Don't get all snippy. Do you think I'd do this, if I didn't have to? I felt my spirit slipping away. For a second I got scared. Then, something you or Breathred said, I can't remember which, got me to thinking. Maybe I could jump into another body,” D'brea explained.

"Why not just go back to your own?” Brogan asked.

"You saw those goof-balls. Would you want to go with them? Besides, I thought if I was in somebody else, they might not be able to bring my body back."

"But, why me?” Stud interrupted her.

"You were closest. I didn't have much time to think about it. I just did it. It wasn't like you weren't thinking about getting in my pants. I just went one better."

Luna's thoughts kept going out to Breathred. Every minute they stayed here, the vampires were carrying him further away. Who knew what they were doing to him? “So, what do we do now?"

"We follow them,” Brogan said.

"In this storm that won't be easy."

"Well, I can do something about the storm,” D'brea replied.

"What do you mean?” Brogan snapped.

"I did start it after all. Even in this body, all I have to do is snap my fingers and poof no more storm,” Stud's face smiled. “See?"

True to her words, she snapped Stud's fingers and the snow stopped.

"Can you do anything about the radio interference?” Brogan prompted.

"Sure thing,” she said with another snap of Stud's fingers.

Brogan didn't even wait for her reply. He ran straight to the radio tent with the rest of them following close behind. He dashed over to the radio and clicked on the handset. It buzzed to life in his hand. Finally, Luna was happy to see something was going right.

"Agent Brogan, report. Again, report. Over,” a voice crackled over the long-dead line.

He winked at Luna. “HQ this is Brogan. Over."

"Good. Thought we'd lost you there. Received unconfirmed report from Eh Ya Campgrounds about vampire invasion. Can you confirm?” the voice demanded.

"Report, affirmative. We have vampire contact.” Brogan waved the others away from the radio, as they huddled around him.

"Do you have coordinates of hostiles? Repeat, send coordinates for immediate wet work,” the voice crackled.

"Negative, hostiles have bugged out. Over."

The voice on the other end paused. Luna felt like grabbing the handset from Brogan and banging the receiver against the table. She noticed he wasn't too happy with his bosses either. His fingers were digging grooves into the thin plastic. She hoped he remembered the radio was their only way out of this.

"Affirmative on hostile location. Anything else? Over,” the voice finally said.

Brogan gave her a thumb's up. “Need ETA on extraction."

Luna wasn't stupid. She knew as well as he did CAPP SAT probably didn't have anything close to them. Unless Elvis came waltzing in here on a UFO in the next twenty minutes, they would lose any chance they had of gaining on the vamps and Breathred.

"We're looking at a thirty minute window,” the voice stated.

"If that's the best you can do, we'll be waiting. Over.” Brogan slammed the receiver on the table.

"We'll never catch them,” Luna moaned.

"Sure we will, Darlin'. You heard Leopold. They won't do anything until they get back to Seattle. We'll get him back. I promise."

"That's right, sugar,” D'brea/Stud said, wrapping his arm around her neck. “Those goobers didn't look like they could blow their noses, let alone bring me back. They probably can't even prick his finger without an owner's manual to tell them how."

"Hell yeah, Luna! We're going to kick their blood-sucking butts,” the Stud half chimed in, drowning out D'brea.

"You really, think so?” Luna wanted to believe, but the odds were against them. She wasn't a fool. If they didn't catch the vamps, Breathred stood a good chance of dying. She just had to have faith.

"You have my word on it,” Brogan assured her.

She looked up and gave him a tearful, silent thank you.

"Hey I just thought of something!” D'brea exclaimed.

"Don't tell me, you've figured out a way to get to them before the extraction team gets here,” Brogan said, hopefully.

"No, I got a weenie. I always wondered what it'd be like to have one of those.” D'brea pulled out on the elastic of Stud's pants to peek below. After a confused minute, she looked up with a strange look on Stud's face.

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