McCann's Manor (44 page)

"Put your clothes on, lass,” Benjamin said simply as he turned his back to her.

Liz grabbed her night shirt and her underwear, donned them in short order before speaking. “Thank you for coming to my aid, Ben."

"Aye, you are welcome. Do you care to tell me how this scene came about?” he asked.

"You don't have to stand there with your back to me. I'm quite adequately covered now,” she said.

Benjamin turned to face her, eyed her gravely. “I am waiting,” he said.

"Will you sit down at least?” she asked.

He sat on the edge of her bed, his expression still somber. “Well?"

Liz was on the verge of tears. “It wasn't my fault, Ben, I swear it. I was sleeping and he was suddenly here, pretending to be John. He
looked
like John."

"Is your John in the habit of coming to visit you in your bed chambers, thus?"

"No, but—you don't understand. John called early this morning to say good bye and I was upset about last night. He hinted that he might come over to see me before he left and—"

"When did you realize this visitor was not John?"

"Not until he called me Elizabeth and by then—"

"Aye, by then it was almost too late. Did he hurt you? What did he say?"

Liz shivered with a new wave of realization of just how close she had come to succumbing to this new attack. “No, he didn't
hurt
me, he said he wanted me to give myself to him."

"What were his exact words?” he asked.

"Oh,” she said, embarrassed, “he said,
'open to me; I must have you
... ‘"

"Open to me, was it?"

Liz nodded, feeling like her father had just caught her necking on her first date with the town lecher. “Then he said, ‘I
will
have you ... you
will
be mine forever.’”

"Aye, it is as I thought; he wasn't talking about a mere tumble with you, was he?” Benjamin asked, a sudden twinkle in his eye that surprised her.

"No, I don't think he was. At first that was exactly what I thought he was talking about, but as soon as I could think clearly, I called for you. Good thing you gave me this garnet,” she said, picked the stone up and turned it in her hand.

He looked at the stone, then at her, smiled finally. “Are you all right, then?"

Liz sighed heavily, hung her head. “I-I'm a little shaken. I guess that's all."

"Come here, little one,” Ben said as he put his arm around her. “You look as though you need a wee bit of comforting."

Liz burst into tears as she felt the warmth of his arms around her. She suddenly felt very alone and lonely. She thought she needed a great deal more than a
wee bit of comforting
.

"There, there ... Surely it isn't that bad, lass,” he soothed.

"Well, it isn't good, is it? I mean, John just left with his daughter for two weeks in Florida; Moira and her bunch are going to start attacking me in my sleep when my defenses are at their lowest, and now I feel like I need someone to hold me more than I have for years. What more could be wrong?"

"I am here with you. I am holding you. I will stay with you as long as you need me,” he said as he cupped her chin in his big hand.

"But you are—"

"I am a ghost. Is that what you were going to say?"

Liz looked at the ceiling. She had never dealt with ghosts who seemed so
alive
. Benjamin was warm, kind, loving. “Who
was
that, Ben? I mean, surely it wasn't Moira trying to seduce me."

"Not that she wouldn't be capable of the disguise, but it was most likely Sean under her direction,” Ben said.

"Oh, Ben I don't understand this composite spirit thing at all! Kim and I have been talking about trying to go back in time and undo whatever it was that caused Moira to be the way she was, but would that be enough?” Liz asked.

"You would go back in time to try to undo what has been done? Very risky business that. You should think the alternatives over quite well before attempting it,” he cautioned.

Liz studied his face a moment. “You have a better suggestion?"

"I wish I did, lass, but I confess I have no better ideas on the subject."

"Will you go with us?"

He frowned, sighed. “Aye, if it is your wish, I will go with you. I would like to see what you are planning to do, lass."

"Wish I
knew
what we're planning, Ben. I'm making this up as I go, I'm afraid. You may be agreeing to go watch us fail totally,” she said grimly.

"You and Kim are the last and only hope any of us has, lass. You will know what to do when the time comes."

Liz studied Ben's assured expression. She could easily lose herself in that face, in those arms, she thought—not that it would do her any good. Ben was from the past. There was no future for the two of them. Besides, even if there was a future for them, he loved Constance—and she had just declared her love for John, hadn't she? Then why did she feel so drawn to Ben? Just stupid, she supposed.

"You look so troubled, lass. Do you wish you had never come here?” Ben asked, cupping her face, so near his.

Liz blinked back tears, shook her head slightly. “No, I don't wish I had never come here. I just wish I wasn't so confused about everything,” she said.

"
Everything
, lass?” he asked, his clear eyes searching hers.

"How can you do that?” she asked.

"Do what?"

"Well,
everything
—hold me, look at me that way—make me feel this way. When you touch me, it feels like you're—” she paused, considered the gravity of what she was thinking.

"Alive? It feels like I am a flesh and blood man, sitting here with you? Is that it, lass?"

It did feel like he was alive and physically
there
with her. But then again, it had also felt like she was with a living, physical man just moments before when she was being accosted by the
John impostor
. “Well,
yes
! Is it all a magic trick? I mean, Moira/Sean just did the same thing to me, making me feel like John was really here, and now, you seem so
real
to me."

"Well, lass, I
am
real, you know. You needed me and I came to you."

"Yes, but how can you seem so physically alive?"

He smiled warmly at her, ran his fingers through her hair. “Consider this, lass. A portal through time can take one into the future as well as the past, can it not?"

"I suppose so."

"And if someone you know died two hundred years ago came to you, you would assume them to be a ghost, when in actuality, they might have come physically through the portal and have been transported through time. Such a person would be
physically alive
, would he not?” he asked, watching her in amusement as the impact of his words hit her.

Liz frowned a moment as she considered what he had said. “Are you telling me you came
forward
in time to help me?"

"Aye, lass, that is
exactly
what I am telling you,” Benjamin affirmed.

"But how can that be? How did you know when to arrive?” she quizzed.

"Alas, I am not sure I can tell you
how
I knew. I have been waiting for you a long time. It is more trial and error than anything else. Once I went far enough forward in time to learn someone
could
save the house and release the spirits, it was only a matter of backtracking, so to speak,” he explained. “Now, you have seen my ghost a few times, true enough. But this is our second meeting in the flesh, and the
ghost
of Benjamin McCann; well, he has gone to the light, as you put it. You'll not
see
that manifestation again."

A light turned on in Liz's mind. “Night before last, when you took us to the pyramid—?” she speculated.

"Aye, that was our first meeting in the flesh. You puzzled over it at the time, wondering why I was so warm and alive-seeming, did you not?"

"Yes, I did. You're going to have to excuse me for not believing all this just at your word. I mean, my reason was almost overwhelmed a few minutes ago into thinking that
liar
was John. How can I be certain this is really you and that you're indeed Benjamin McCann in the flesh?"

"Good girl! Don't simply accept my word for it. You must have proof of everything from here on. Look at me, Elizabeth. I imparted my knowledge to you and Kimberly in the pyramid that night, remember? You
know
me. All you have to do is ask your own knowing, lass. Remember, also, that if I am not the real Benjamin McCann, I cannot go into that pyramid, not even if you give me your permission.” Benjamin explained.

Liz looked deep into his eyes, realized for the first time they were the exact same dark steel blue-gray color of John's eyes. There were other similarities between them as well, such as facial structure and body build, now that she noticed it. Was the inexplicable reason she found herself so drawn to Ben that he reminded her of John? This
man
in front of her was Benjamin; she'd stake her life on it. In fact, she
was
staking her life on it, wasn't she? She was positive now he was telling her the truth. “You're right. I
do
know you. Sorry for doubting. But where is Timothy?"

"No, don't apologize. You are right to have doubts. I left the cat chasing mice; ‘tis his favorite interest. Just keep in mind, anyone who claims to be me can be proved or disproved by the pyramid if you cannot tell the difference. And I will now be happy to go there with you to prove my words, if you wish it."

Liz smiled at him. “That won't be necessary, Ben. I trust you."

"Aye, you do. Mark my words that you do not trust too lightly, lass. Much depends on your not trusting the wrong ones,” he cautioned.

"That brings up a point, Ben. When the spirit of Tarrh—or Moira—appeared to me here before, it was easy to tell it wasn't a physically alive entity. But just now ... Ben, I really believed it
was
John for a while. There was only something in the back of my mind that wouldn't accept it somehow. Could Moira have sent Sean through the portal to me from the past, too? Could this entity that was with me have been alive?"

"Aye, it could have happened, but the last I knew, they did not have a way to control the portal, so it would have been a blind chance they were taking. Besides, I suspect Moira was here as well, attacking you with magic while he was accosting your body, because she is the one who wants to control you. Her magic is very powerful and she
could
appear to be alive and assume any form she chose—or work a spell that would make Sean look like your beloved John,” Benjamin said.

Liz wondered what she was hearing in Ben's tone when he spoke about her
beloved John.
It couldn't be jealousy and yet, it sounded like something akin to the green-eyed response. She wanted to ask him about it, but there were other things more important they needed to talk about, weren't there? How could he be so certain Moira and Sean couldn't control the portal? “Moira is a total enigma to me, Ben. Do you know anything about her life before she became Tarrh's wife? Why is she so bent on destroying everything? And there is yet another entity wrapped up in all this as well. Are you aware of that?"

"I have no answers for these questions, Elizabeth. I did try to learn more about her, of course, but it appears even Tarrh himself didn't know that much about her. Therefore, I have no idea why she would be so vindictive,” Benjamin said with a shrug. “What of this other entity? What do you mean?

"I don't know about the entity, except it's older and more powerful. I know what Moira wants, though,” Liz confided.

"You do? Well, what is it, lass?"

"The reason she wanted to control Missy and now me is that she wants the chance to live out her days as a mere mortal
without
magic. For some reason she feels she was cheated out of a
normal
life and she wants someone to trade places with her willingly,” Liz said.

Benjamin frowned, shook his head. “You think
that
is what all this is about?"

"Yes, I do. I know it may not make sense to us, but to her warped mind it may make perfect sense. Ben, don't you see? She hates magic, feels it's a curse she's been forced to endure,” she suggested.

"I see. Your assessment may just be correct. So you believe if we could find out what happened to make her feel this way—"

"It will take slightly more than just finding out what happened. We would need to heal the hurt she suffered as well,” Liz said.

"And then?"

Liz took a deep breath. Did Ben think she was daft, or was he buying her rationale? Why did it matter whether he agreed or not? Because she would have to convince him to come with Kim and her and help them, that was why. “Okay, Ben,” she began, “I've been thinking about this a lot and correct me if I'm wrong. I don't really know much about magic, but Tarrh worked some kind of binding spell on Moira and Sean, right?"

"Aye, that he did..."

"Well, what has been bound can be unbound, can't it?"

"Aye, lass, but you have to know exactly what incantations or spells were used to work the binding, and you have to be very strong in the black arts,” he warned.

"Are you sure? You unbound them from Tarrh's pit for a time—and later you put another binding on them to send them back. Later, Leonard and Missy let them out again—so it can't be all that hard."

Benjamin stared at her in disbelief. “Surely you are not serious. I let them out quite by accident and it took me years to discover how to rebind them. Leonard and Melissa were ignorant of magic, and their actions have been disastrous. The act they performed unknowingly cost them their lives as well as their souls and reopened the gate to hell itself,” he protested.

"It's
not
hell, Ben,” she contradicted. “Granted, it may be
like
hell for Tarrh, but it's not hell itself. My point is, you
did
rebind them. If we could enlist Tarrh to help us, the four of us together could undo the damage Moira has done. The spirits all need to be freed from the binding before we can release them forever. And before we can free them from the binding, we have to heal Moira from whatever happened to her,” Liz said simply.