Princess Sera's stare softened, and she closed her hand over one of Carina's fists while Xandros still held her other one. The princess reached up with her free hand to stroke Carina's cheek. “We have more in common than you think."
When Carina opened her eyes, Xandros was surprised to see tears swimming in their dark brown depths. “It calls me the messenger, and I don't even have a message,” she said brokenly. “All I've known is revenge and death."
"And love,” the princess said. “You love, Carina."
"That's no message to save the universe,” Carina scoffed. She wiped the tears away with a jerky movement.
"On the contrary, it's the most important message you can share,” the princess told her. “But I think your message will be given to you when the time is right.” She turned her attention to Leo. “You have a plan? You always have a plan."
Leo grinned. “Yes, I've got a plan. We're going to give them what they want."
It wasn't a great plan.
Not according to Xandros, who didn't like the fact that his mate was going to be front and center. Also the fact that the plan seemed to hinge on some mystical woo-hoo bullshit he didn't understand.
The whole thing pissed him off. Leave it to the universe to fuck him again once he'd found the woman he loved. Wasn't it bad enough that he'd been through hell already? Sitting on the bridge of this ship headed to insanity, he wallowed in self-pity. If only his father hadn't been a traitor. If only he'd slogged it out on Nylar when everyone harassed him about his father's betrayal. If only he hadn't been caught and tortured by the TIF.
If only.
That was pointless. The facts were certain. All those things had happened, and he couldn't change them. And he wasn't sure if he
would
change them.
"Are you worried the plan will fail?” Princess Sera interrupted his thoughts.
Hell yes
. “Leo is suggesting that the Brotherhood will sacrifice sense to kill you,” he said bluntly. “If he's wrong, my mate pays the price."
He and the princess were alone on the bridge. Shaun had claimed he needed a nap, and Leo and Carina had disappeared to get something to eat. Xandros wasn't sure why it had felt planned, but this conversation hadn't occurred by accident.
"You believe he'd sacrifice Carina?” Princess Sera didn't seem angry or put out. Her beautiful face was serene, unlined.
"For you?” Xandros studied the princess. He was a man who loved good-looking women, but for some reason, Princess Sera left him cold. “I think he'd sacrifice anything for you."
He sat in the com chair, his leg flung over the side, but he sat up straight when the princess strode closer and straddled him. He jerked his head up, and his hands grabbed the armrests. What the fuck was she doing?
"And you wouldn't? Listen to me, pirate.” She leaned closer, her lips near his ear, her hips aligned with his. “There's an extremely important fact you missed in that workout room.” Her breath was warm, and he couldn't help his body's reaction to her. He tensed, prepared to throw her off him if she tried to press closer. “Leo would never sacrifice those he loves.” She leaned back and met his stare. “And he loves all of us. We are bonded in ways we may never understand."
"But if it came down to you or—"
Her fingers touched his mouth, and his voice died. She stroked his lips, her nails sliding over his sensitive skin. “He wouldn't choose, pirate. He would rather die himself."
"His plan has flaws."
The princess backed away and shrugged. “Any plan would. Tell me, Xandros. Is it Leo you don't trust or yourself?"
"What the hell does that mean?"
"Who would you sell out to save Carina? Would you allow billions to be enslaved to save her?"
Fuck. He wanted to say,
No, of course not
, but his throat closed. He'd suggested running away to Carina but knew she would refuse to run. But what if she'd said yes? Would he have turned his back on the universe to keep Carina?
"I don't know,” he said, his voice hoarse.
Princess Sera's face softened. “Ah Xandros. You doubt. That's good."
He snorted. “You think? The idea that I might sell out billions for one woman is frightening."
The woman smiled. “I know the feeling.” She pressed her hand on his shoulder. “I think, Xandros Jasper, when the time comes, you'll make the right choice."
"You know they're expecting us,” Carina said. She'd waited until she and Leo were alone to speak the truth. Leo could plan all he wanted, but she knew the Brotherhood had anticipated every step she'd taken.
"Yes, I know.” Leo warmed up two meat pockets. The smell filled the dining area. It reminded her of home, of Nylar, of her childhood. Leo had never been a good cook, and Shanie's time at her clothing store had kept her late. As a child, Carina had eaten whatever slop Leo had put in front of her, thrilled the military hero would spend time with her at all.
A smile lifted her lips. Had her hero worship ever been too much for him? “I wanted to be just like you when I was a kid."
A dark scowl twisted Leo's face as he stared at the laser heater. “I know it."
"Leo, I made the choice. Every step of the way, I chose. You didn't force me into anything.” She could sense his guilt, his overdeveloped sense of responsibility.
Finally he met her gaze. “You were nineteen, Carina. Nineteen. And I didn't question it when the general wanted to put you undercover."
"You know why now.” She held his stare. Yes, they knew. The Brotherhood had arranged it all. They wanted to own Carina's soul, so they murdered her sister, corrupted her brother-in-law, and made her a killer.
A shiver made her tremble. They fucking knew. Every damn step along the way, the Brotherhood had anticipated them, waited for them. Now was no different. Her fingers threaded through her shorn, jagged hair.
Leo touched her hair, a bleak expression pinching his eyes. “Why did they do this?"
"My team probably did it. I'm lucky to be alive,” she said, then stood up abruptly. She turned her back. “It's common to shave the head of a traitor."
Carefully, Leo put his arm around her shoulders. When was the last time she'd let Leo comfort her? Years. He pulled her into his arms and held her closely. Confusing emotions lodged in her throat, and she resisted the urge to break away.
Leo pressed her head into his shoulder. “The universe has a reason for everything, but I'll be damned if I can figure this one out."
"Dominos,” she said huskily.
He leaned back. “What?"
She glanced up at him. “If Shanie hadn't been killed, if we hadn't gone undercover, if all that hadn't happened, do you think we'd be here now? If all the horrible things hadn't happened, you wouldn't have ended up with Princess Sera. If Shanie hadn't died, Xandros wouldn't have acted on the love he has for me.” She noted Leo didn't seem surprised by her assessment. “The universe only looks random. There's nothing random about it."
He squeezed her, then let her go. “How do you suggest we deal with the Brotherhood? If you're right, and they know what we plan, what should we do?"
"The last thing they'd expect."
"Which would be?” Leo placed a meat pocket in front of her.
"Your plan, but with modifications.” The crust was hot, but Carina picked at it with her fingers to place small bites on her lips. Heat. That's what surrounded the surface of Pelios. Liquid molten lava ran over the surface of the prison planet.
What the priests wouldn't anticipate was that she would remember the words, the intonation that Father Pestori had spoken. Or perhaps they didn't realize she'd come into contact with the Nariadians.
"What modifications?” Leo had finished his meal and brushed crumbs off his uniform.
"While Xandros brings the princess to Father Pestori, Shaun and I are going to rescue those men.” She held Leo's gaze. He wouldn't agree to this. He wouldn't understand.
Sure enough, he shook his head. “Too risky. The Brotherhood doesn't trust Xandros."
"Actually, he's the only one they'll trust.” The Brotherhood had studied him, studied her. They would believe she had no memory, that Xandros would attempt to get out of their connection. If he bargained for his return to Nylar, the priests would buy it.
The question was whether the leader of the Brotherhood would buy it.
"They've seen the rage. They know he's more than just your marked mate.” Leo wasn't convinced. And if he wasn't, the chance that Xandros would go along with the plan was pretty slim.
She leaned forward and stared at her brother-in-law. “They don't know anything about Nyral markings, Leo. Even I didn't know.” She nodded when his gaze slid away. “You know what I mean. They think it's just some chemical thing, something genetic that can be cut away.” She emphasized the word with the downward slash of her arm. “The rest of the world—hell, anyone who isn't marked like this—they think it's simple.” Her mark flared to life when she extended her arm to show Leo the intricate mark, the bird's feathers, the dark predatory gaze of its eyes, the curve of its beak all carved into her skin like a tattoo. It was permanent, embedded deep inside her soul as much as it had been burned into her arm. “Look at this, Leo. I can't explain it, but I know he was meant for me. And I was meant to be here, in this moment."
Leo stared at the mark on her arm. With his finger, he traced the edge of the bird. “Shanie and I hoped that you would find a nice man, settle down, and have children.” His mouth twisted, and she resisted the urge to jerk her arm away. Gently he stroked her arm. “We had dreams for you the way any parent would.” He lifted his gaze and met hers. “But when Shanie was murdered, I didn't think about you at all. I sent you into hell and didn't think twice."
"Leo—” How could she explain it? For a moment, the words weren't there, but then, she remembered the moment she'd decided to go after the Brotherhood. “I never told you what happened that day, did I?"
He blinked, his scarred face suddenly seeming vulnerable. She covered his hand with hers. “You found me, remember? In the house, covered in blood."
Leo nodded slowly. “You didn't speak for days."
"They—” She swallowed. Of all the memories, she wanted to forget this one. “Shanie escaped them at first. You trained her well."
A muscle moved in Leo's jaw, and his lips tightened. “Not well enough."
"Enough for her to save me.” She took a deep breath. “She was bleeding. Femoral.” She tried to deliver the story in the way she reported her kills. Short and to the point. “She knew she was dying. But she thought—” Tears clogged her throat. Damn. Fucking memories. “She thought the assassins wanted us both. So she hid me under that fucking couch and made sure they followed her. She deliberately let them kill her. For me."
Her cheeks were wet, and Leo's warm fingers on her face made her flinch. But he cupped her face and held her blurry gaze. “Oh honey."
"And then, you came. You went into the rage and killed them all.” She closed her eyes and clenched her fists. “I wanted to bathe in their blood, dance on their bones."
Slowly she took a deep breath and opened her eyes. “I decided I would do whatever it took to find the man who ordered her death.” She reached up and gripped his hands on her face. “So, you see, it didn't matter what you said or did, Leo. I would have gone after him."
"I should have—” he started, but she shook her head.
"All that time I didn't speak, I was planning. Your permission was...incidental.” She'd always wanted to tell him, but there never seemed to be a time to say the words.
"So you became Rina, the assassin.” He held her hands. “I know what being a Primarian made me. What did being an assassin make you?"
She stared at the tabletop. “Awful,” she whispered. “So terrible that I hope Xandros never knows the things I've done."
"He won't care,” Leo said calmly.
The hell he wouldn't. She trembled. “It wasn't just the kinky sexual favors I did or the people I murdered.” She gritted her teeth. “I used Shaun. I used anyone and everyone. And not every time was for the ‘greater good.’ It was as if there was another me, another person in charge who felt nothing."
"Stars, Carina,” Leo exclaimed. “You
had
to do it. Four years with those monsters would fuck anyone up. Trust him. He loves you."
She pounded her fist on the table. “And how long would that last when he found out that I know his father is innocent?"
"What?” Leo's hands tightened on hers in a death grip, and his gaze was on the door behind her.
Shit.
"Leo, can I have a minute with my mate?” Xandros's voice was quiet. Too quiet.
When Leo rose to his feet, Carina stared back down at the tabletop. Leo cleared his throat and then abruptly left the room.
Xandros took the chair Leo had vacated and clasped his hands in front of him on the table. She waited for him to blast her, yell at her for not telling him. Instead he waited a moment and then reached across the table to cup her hands in his. “Carina, I love you. Whatever you know about my father isn't going to change that."
"Don't say that. You don't know.” She tugged on her hands, but he held them tighter.
"Machinka—"
She couldn't stand it. “No! You don't understand.” It was difficult, but she made herself look at him. “The Brotherhood set your father up. They've been planning this for a long time. All of it. And I was part of it.” Abruptly, she snapped to her feet, but Xandros kept a tight grip on her hand.
"Sit down,” Xandros ordered.
She sat but didn't meet his stare. “I knew. Years ago, I knew. I was part of the cover-up to make sure everyone thought he was guilty."
His stillness made her heart ache. “How could you be a part of that, Carina? You weren't even born yet.” He wouldn't let her hands go, but she didn't feel the warmth of his touch. Cold spread from the inside out.
"Because three years ago, the conspiracy that sent your father to the Mistresses began to fall apart.” She bit her lip and met his gaze. “And I helped them cover it back up.” She dropped her stare to her clenched fists cupped in his hands.