Make Me Yours (12 page)

* * * *

Erik gripped the bathroom doorframe and listened. Susan was crying. What had happened? She’d gotten a few texts, mumbled something, and then dashed out of the room. Then he’d heard her talking to someone, raising her voice a few times. He’d had to fight to stay in his seat. If she needed privacy, she could have it, but if she needed help he wanted her to damned well say so. It had to be David. What had he said to her? He wanted to go into the bathroom and ask her what was wrong, but he didn’t dare. He couldn’t take being accused of being jealous and possessive again, not after they had such a wonderful evening together and woken up so happy.

He touched the door lightly, wishing he could touch her. He wanted to hold her gently and have her tell him everything. He wanted to fix all her problems and drive away anything and everything that ever vexed her. It was impossible, but he wanted to spend every day trying to do exactly that. He wanted to take care of her. He’d never wanted that before. Most importantly, he wanted to build a life with her. He wanted to marry her more than he’d ever wanted anything in his life.

She’d have to settle things with David first. He had no doubt of what had upset her. David had lied to her again. Or worse, he’d told her the truth. Would Susan be upset because she didn’t know who she wanted? She’d be upset over hurting either of them. Who would she choose? She wasn’t in love with David, but she did love him very much. He sighed because he was in the same boat. She loved him, but was she in love with him? He had no way of knowing what she felt. When they made love, he believed she was falling in love with him, but how sure could he be about such beliefs? He could easily convince himself she loved him while she was coming and screaming his name, but he knew better than to put too much faith in his ability to give her pleasure. He wasn’t going to fool himself into believing he’d win because they were sleeping together. Letting him come inside her had certainly meant something, but that had been in the heat of the moments when both their emotions had been running high. What if she felt being with him was too confusing right now? He would agree if she wanted to stop having sex, but what if she wanted to stop seeing him completely until she made her mind up? He didn’t think he’d be able to stand it.

He moved away from the door quietly and went back to his work. He’d give her time to compose herself. Doing so would also give him time to calm down. If she wanted to talk, they would talk. If she wanted to act as if nothing had happened, he would accept that. Sooner or later, she’d open up to him. He kept telling himself that as he lost himself in the reports in front of him.

* * * *

When Susan got home, David was nowhere to be found. Jeremiah said he had gone out. Was he avoiding her? Was he going to come in drunk? She didn’t think he’d drive, but hadn’t he almost done so the other night? She sent him a text and waited nervously for a reply.

Erik had been wonderful all day. He’d been very attentive, obviously sensing something was wrong. He hadn’t questioned her, and she liked that. His jealousy regarding David had been justified, so she could hardly blame him in retrospect. Also, his patience showed he trusted her. He had faith that she would come to him when she needed him.

She took the things they’d bought up to her room. She put all the bathroom items in her suitcase and then searched for her spare pajamas, which she eventually found in the very bottom drawer of the chest. She tossed in the jeans and two shirts she had picked out on Erik’s insistence and then also grabbed a skirt from her closet and threw it in. She grabbed some underwear and socks from her clean laundry pile and then shut the suitcase. Her phone buzzed as she slid the case under the bed.

I need some time. Don’t worry about me. I got a hotel. Just want to be alone.

She wanted to throw the phone across the room. He’d been the one to insist they finish this face to face tonight. He was doing it on purpose. He was angry she’d said she loved Erik and angry she’d hung up on him.

Please come home and let’s talk.

No. Please, Susan. Just give me a couple of days.

Why?
She didn’t know if he’d respond, and if he didn’t she’d leave him alone. What else could she do?

I’ll make it all worse if we talk now. I can’t put it into words. Please. Wednesday. Okay?

Okay.

She put her phone down, but then she picked it up again. She read all of his text messages again. Soon she ran into older ones. He sent her one at least twice a day, just telling her jokes or other random things. She felt stupid and naïve. She got up and went to Jeremiah’s room. She knocked gently. “You got a minute?”

“Yeah,” he called.

She came in and shut the door. He put his video game controller aside and turned toward her. “What’s up?”

She looked at his Nintendo system on the table by the television. She laughed. “That thing works? How old is it? It was freaking ancient when we were in college!”

“Not that old. Of course it works! I took great care of it.” He patted the mattress. “Come on. Something’s wrong.”

“Gee, how did you guess?” She sat down on the bed beside him. “You talk to David lately?”

He shook his head. “Nope. He’s been silent and pissed off since he woke up yesterday morning.”

“He told me he’s in love with me,” she blurted.

“Holy shit! What? When?”

“Today on the phone. He sent me some texts, and when he became hostile I called him. He told me over the phone.”

“Over the phone? Really?”

“I kind of forced him to. I didn’t realize that was what he wanted to say.”

“You think he really is?”

She shrugged. “I think he’s confused. I’m sure he believes he is. He’s very jealous of Erik. He said he was worried about Erik being jealous, worried he would hurt me.”

“Erik would never hurt you!”

“I know! But…”

“But what?”

“David lied to me. He told me he was fine with me dating Erik. He told me he only had the beginnings of feelings for me. He told me Erik threatened him. Erik said he thought David was trying to look like the good guy and then break us up and step in. I didn’t believe that, but it’s hard to deny now.”

“I think you’re right about him being confused. If he really loved you he wouldn’t want to see you hurt. He wouldn’t lie to you.”

“That’s what Erik said, and that’s what I told David. It only upset him.”

“This is all my fault.”

What? How could he believe that? “What do you mean? It’s not your fault you didn’t tell me David liked me years ago.”

Jeremiah looked uncomfortable. What was he going to say? She couldn’t take any more revelations today.

“Jeremiah?”

“When I decided to propose the bookstore idea to you guys, in the back of my mind I was thinking about how David used to feel about you. I had no idea if he still did or not, but I thought you both deserved to be happy. You two are the best friends I’ve ever had. You two getting together would have been perfect in some ways. I hated seeing you both alone for such tragic reasons.”

“That was a sweet, wonderful hope. You shouldn’t feel bad for wishing us happiness. You didn’t know I’d see Erik again.”

“When nothing happened, I thought I was wrong and dismissed it. When David became quiet and moody after Erik contacted you, I wondered but didn’t say anything until that day you and I talked.”

“Jeremiah, don’t you dare blame yourself. If things were different, maybe one day I would have woken up and seen David in a different light. Or maybe not.” She sighed. “I’m in love with Erik. I think I fell in love with him years ago, but our age difference complicated matters. I have to settle this now. I can’t lose him.”

“You won’t. He’ll understand. Have you told him yet?”

“No. He’s told me how he feels. He’s in love with me. He said he never stopped thinking of me. He said he fell in love with me ten years ago.”

“He meant it, I’m sure. I remember the way he always looked at you. He waited ten years, so he can wait a few days.”

“We’re going out Wednesday night. I hope David comes back early enough for us to talk.”

“Where is he?”

“He’s in a hotel.”

“What? Are you serious?”

“Yes.” She pulled up the text and showed him. “I wish I weren’t.”

“Do you want me to make myself scarce when you two talk?”

“Doesn’t matter. He seems pretty upset. I’m a little scared.”

“Scared? Why? Has he done something?”

She shook her head when she heard the panic in his voice. “Not scared of him. Scared of what he’ll say. Of how upset he’ll be when we talk face to face. Whether he really loves me or not, he believes he does. I’m also afraid we won’t be able to repair our friendship. How can we work together if we can’t be around each other?”

“Don’t worry about that. We’ll figure that out later. You guys can work opposite days. I can buy him out. Or maybe he’ll be fine in time. Don’t worry about something you aren’t sure of yet.”

She leaned over and hugged him. “This is insane.”

He hugged her tight and rubbed her back. “It’s not. It will be fine.”

She pulled back and looked at him. “How do you know?”

“Whether he’s in love with you or not, he loves you. You love him. He won’t throw away your friendship. It might be hard though.”

“It seems impossible to me. I wish he were here now.”

“He needs time. Your talk might go better if he has this time and distance to think. Don’t you agree? Especially given the way he’s been acting lately?”

“You’re probably right, but this delay gives me two days to worry. Erik has to work all day tomorrow.”

“That’s good. He’ll see how agitated you are. This is better.”

“So you’re gonna put up with me and keep me entertained?”

“If that’s what you need.”

“Yes. So make plans.” She stood up and went to the door. “Thanks, Jer.”

“You’re welcome. I promise never to fall in love with you.”

She laughed. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

He picked up his game controller again. “I won’t let you down.”

She went back to her room and changed clothes. She opened her laptop and began searching the Internet for some addictive games. She knew she wouldn’t get any sleep that night.

* * * *

Erik knocked on the door, but no one answered. The house was dark, but Susan had been expecting him. She would have called or sent him a text if she were out or running late. He walked around the back of the house to look around. Jeremiah’s car was gone, but Susan’s was in the open garage and David’s was parked behind it. He heard voices, so he moved toward the garage.

Susan stood against the wall. David was very close to her, his stance tense and confrontational. Susan looked upset. Erik immediately felt defensive. David wouldn’t hurt her, not physically, but anything he said would be burned in her memory forever. She was far too tenderhearted for her own good. He quickened his pace.

They didn’t hear him treading across the grass. David moved closer and put his hands on Susan’s shoulders. He leaned forward and kissed her. Erik stopped dead in his tracks, his heart giving a hard thud at the sight. He couldn’t believe how much it hurt to see another man kiss her. The hurt turned to anger when she pushed David, told him to let her go, but he held her against the wall and tried to kiss her again. Erik bolted forward and yanked David away. Susan gasped in surprise, and David looked equally startled.

“When a lady says to let her go, that’s a sure sign she doesn’t care for your attention.” He punched David in the nose, and he couldn’t believe how good it felt. He wanted to do it ten more times, but instead he shoved him to the ground. He turned to Susan, expecting her to run into his arms, but instead she ran to David and examined his bloody nose.

“Erik, how could you?” she exclaimed.

He couldn’t believe his ears. “How could I? A man is kissing my girlfriend. She pushes him and says ‘let go,’ but he tries to kiss her again. I really don’t think my actions were
that
irrational.”

Susan glared up at him. “Erik, just go! David and I need to talk. I don’t feel like going out tonight.” She held David’s hand in hers, and her other hand rested on his face as she looked back at him. She turned back and put her body defensively in front of him. “I’ll call you later.”

“Don’t bother!” He stormed off, knowing if he didn’t he’d most likely punch David at least five more times.

Susan whispered something to David, and he was glad he couldn’t hear what it was. She rushed to catch him. “Erik, I told you to go so you two don’t end up brawling on the ground like a couple of cavemen! We just need to finish our talk. It’s not my fault he got back here so late. I’m sorry I’m breaking our date, but your reaction was far too harsh, and it’s only made the entire situation worse. Can you please try to understand? Or are you too busy oozing testosterone?”

He stopped and rounded on her, forcing her to collide with his chest. He backed away. Tears streamed down her face. He didn’t know what to say to her because he didn’t know what to think. Why was she crying? Was she concerned about David? Did she even care what breaking their date and sending him away now implied? Had she pulled away from David’s kiss because she didn’t want him to kiss her? Or because it had confused her? He looked away from her, unable to watch her crying.