Luster (10 page)

M
y fists ball up
at my sides. I will not hit this motherfucker. I will
not
hit this motherfucker. But I really want to. I really should just knock him flat on his ass… I can’t though.

Liam yanks at my shirt, his eyes welled up with those big crocodile tears I can’t stand to see fall from his eyes. “Please don’t make me go home. I want to stay here tonight. Please?”

Donald stands in the doorframe of my hallway, his hairy arms folded together while he looks around. “This is a pretty nice setup you got here, man. You must be doin’ pretty good. If you’da just sent some our way, we might not be in this situation right now. Know what I’m sayin’?”

I jump up but Sam quickly pushes my chest back before I can do anything. I don’t want to hurt her so I relax some, but Donald just stands there rolling his eyes at me as if he doubts what I would do to him. He’s one dumbass motherfucker then, because Liam is literally the only reason why I haven’t shut his ass down yet.

“This isn’t about me. Now are you gonna let the kid stay or not? That’s all he wants to know,” I say, my hands shaking from anger.

Liam pulls himself around behind my legs, peeking up at his dad. “Please, Daddy?”

Donald glares back at him in response and Liam shrinks back even more, not bothering to question his dad. Donald scares the ever loving crap out of him, and at his age I don’t blame him.

Sam steps in between us, clearing her throat. She’s always had to be the middleman in this whole transaction, unfortunately. I know it’s worn her down over the years. “Look guys we can figure this out — “The door opens up and in walks Falyn, looking completely caught off guard. She gives me an apologetic smile and waves at Liam and Samantha. “Sorry everyone. I didn’t realize you had company Matt, or I would’ve knocked first.”

Donald straightens up and walks over to Falyn, sticking his hand straight out for her to shake. “Hello there. I’m Donald Carr, Liam’s father.”

Falyn politely smiles at him and shakes his hand. “It’s very nice to meet you. I’m Falyn Morrissey.”

His eyes dart to mine, curious. “Ah. Your name sounds pretty familiar. You don’t happen to be related to the Morrissey guy who owns put up all those fancy hotels, do you?”

Even hearing him breathe in close proximity to Falyn makes me want to punch in right in his fat gut.

“Yes, actually. That’s my father.”

I can almost hear the wheels slowly turn in Donald’s head so I butt in, taking Falyn’s hand in mine. “It’s okay, babe. Just trying to figure out some family stuff.”

She gives me a knowing look, trying to figure out what’s going on without saying anything.

“All right Liam, we gotta get going. I’ve got some stuff at home to get to. Looks like we ain’t getting that new A/C unit though. It’s going to get mighty warm tonight, son.” He looks between me and Sam like this is some sort of personal threat to us. I hate seeing the guilty look on my sister’s face as she mouths ‘please?’ to me.

I close my eyes briefly and pull out a couple hundred dollars from my wallet, hating to part with the money most especially when it’s going into Donald’s greedy hands. He smiles smugly at me and starts heading out the door without even a thank you. Fucking typical.

Liam squeezes my legs tighter before letting go, the look he’s giving me nearly kills me right here on the spot. I hate every time we have to say goodbye. I can see the way Sam’s hands twitch as if she’s ready to pull Liam back and never let him go again.

“Liam! I said now!” Donald’s gruff voice echoes in my ears and Liam visibly shakes as he quietly walks back over to his dad. Falyn raises her brow at me but I just look on. There’s nothing I can do here is much as I want to. At least according to Sam and James’s lawyer.

Liam tugs at Donald’s shirt and his words are so low and quiet I can barely hear them myself. “I just want to stay here with my brother. Just for tonight please, Daddy? Or can I go to Sammy’s house?”

The veins in Donald’s forehead pulse and I can tell he’s starting to lose the tiniest bit of patience he has. It looks like a bomb’s getting ready to go off and everybody starts yelling at once, trying to diffuse the situation.

Falyn yanks at my arm, whispering quickly in my ear. “Remember what I said about being diplomatic with this asshole!”

I grit my teeth knowing that she’s probably right. All we ever do is fight and yell amongst each other and it never seems to get us anywhere. Maybe it is time to try a more diplomatic approach. “Okay Donald. Maybe we should try something new.”

Both he and Sam look at me like I’ve grown another head on my shoulders.

“Seriously. The way it’s working with Liam right now isn’t working at all. Donald, man, I know you have a lot of work going on right now and I know that it’s easier to get it done with Liam out of your hair. So let’s do this. Me and Sam can take turns taking him while you’re working during the day. In exchange you won’t have to pay us or anything like you do with the babysitter. Just let him come stay the weekends with us and we’ll be okay. Right Sam?”

She nods fast, joining in the conversation. “Absolutely. Whatever we can do to help
you
do what you need to do.” She picks up quick just like I hoped.

The way Donald shuffles around for a moment I think he might possibly be considering this whole thing. “I’ll… give it some thought. Come on Liam. You’ll get to see your brother and sister tomorrow I’m sure.”

I know Liam doesn’t quite understand what’s happening, but he knows it’s a good thing and grins up at me, the two front missing teeth cracking me up for a split-second.

* * *

“
Y
ou are amazing
,” I say as I wrap my arms around Falyn’s waist from behind. “Seriously. How did you know that would work?”

She shrugs her shoulders. “I didn’t. But I knew you’d find a way to make it work. You’re a smart guy believe it or not.”

I squeeze her tightly against me, still not sure how the two of us have held together this well. “Thank you. I mean it. Nothing is more important to me than my brother and sister and you might’ve just helped us work things out with that crazy bastard. Please, stay here tonight. Stay with me and I’ll make us some dinner or something.”

It would be the first time she’s stayed here with me if she does. Each night we’ve been hanging out together I’ve always gone to hang out and stay over her house. My apartment is much smaller in size as well as my bed and maybe part of me is sort of a little embarrassed by it. I could probably afford to get bigger and more expensive things but I just don’t. Just because I have money doesn’t mean I get to throw it all at random things like that. Although Falyn does have a pretty damn comfortable mattress… I might have to see about getting my own now that I think about it.

She spins around in my arms, looking up at me from under her curled lashes. “I don’t know… I have a few things to do at home tonight.”

The rejection stings even though it’s a small one. I play it cool though. “You sure? I’m a pretty good cook. I’m sure I can find something to whip up for us. And I might not have the expensive movie collection that you do but I’ve got a hell of a lot of CDs and records.”

Falyn laughs. “Records? What is this 1982?”

I purse my lips at her, pinching her sweet ass and making her squeal. Sometimes you just gotta remind her who she’s dealing with. “Hey now. Respect the retro. Vinyl is where it’s at.”

She’s not paying attention to what I’m saying though and gets lost in me a different way.

Falyn reaches up and traces her thumb a long my face, playfully tugging at the beard that’s growing. I hadn’t planned on keeping the damn thing but sometimes I don’t want to deal with all the work that goes into shaving it all away.

“It’s a really tempting offer and all… But I do have to go work. Sorry. How about I make us some dinner reservations at my favorite place for tomorrow night?”

I rest my hands on her hips, enjoying the way they fit just right over the luscious curves. I sigh, pretending to be irritated. “I guess so. I mean if you want to just disrespect my cooking like that then fine, whatever.”

“Pfft. Is that a yes then, you big baby?”

I squeeze her hips in my hands and pull her up even closer against myself, showing her that there was more on my mind than just food. “There is nothing babyish about what I want to do to you right now, Falyn. You could find out though if you stay.”

She chuckles and shakes her head as she pulls away from me, giving me a pat on my own ass for good measure. “As enticing as that sounds I really have to go. I promise I’ll text you when I get home in a little while. Maybe you’ll get lucky and even get a shot of my boobs or something.”

I snatch her hand up in mine, not wanting to let go of her just yet. “Now that sounds more like it, Miss Morrissey. I will hold you to those words although I’d like to hold you against a lot of things right now…”

“I’m leaving,” she says slowly, backing away towards my door. “Seriously this time.”

She blows me a kiss and then she’s gone, leaving me alone to my thoughts once more. But this time I don’t cringe at them. They’re always good thoughts when Falyn’s on my mind.

Something whistles around my head, telling me to pay more attention. Something’s going on here underneath everything. Falyn walked into my life not that long ago and already I can feel this tether between us. Holding us together even though convention says we should really be apart. But I know what I want.

And yeah, even if it means reaching the point of no return, it’s her.

I
rush
out of the bar and stomp right up to Matt, my arms folded. “I cannot believe I’m about to say this, but I can’t find my wallet. Anywhere.”

“Did you check to see if maybe you dropped it?” He starts scanning the floor around us. “Where was the last place you used it?”

Shit, I have no idea. “I can’t remember… the dry-cleaners yesterday, maybe? No… it was after that sometime. I know I had it when I came over to your place last night. Oh my God, I must’ve left it somewhere between there and my penthouse! Shit, Matt! I gotta call the credit card companies and my bank. Put holds on all the cards. Dammit my father’s going to kill me. I had a company credit card in there.”

I pull out my phone and quickly find the numbers I need to look for, making the embarrassing calls one by one. I seriously can’t believe I’m in this situation. I’ve never lost my wallet and I know I had it on me before I left to go over to Matt’s yesterday. I remember paying for a coffee right after I ran into Dinah too. Where the hell could it possibly be?

Matt watches me closely, and I have to wonder why he’s not freaking out a little more like I am. Surely he knows what this feels like. “What?”

He just shakes his head. “Nothing. I guess I’m just surprised that you of all people can’t find your wallet. You’re the most organized person I’ve ever met.”

“I
am
really organized. And I always keep my purse close, too! I just don’t understand how it could’ve fallen out of it… ”

He shrugs his shoulders and motions for the door. “Let’s just head over to The Bandeau. There’s nothing we can do about your wallet right now. You’ve already made all the right phone calls, so let’s go relax, and enjoy our dinner.”

I feel a wail rising up in my throat. I wish it were that simple. “No, you see. That’s not how it works. They’re going to need my ID to hold the reservation. It’s a really elitist type place. And I know that’s not your style or anything,” I cut him off before he gives me one of those ridiculous lectures about snobby uppity places and how he hates them. “But I really like their food. And I know you’ll really like their food too. Except it doesn’t matter now because I’m a fucking idiot and can’t find my damn wallet. Oh my god this is just not happening!”

“Really Falyn, it’s not that serious. Maybe it’ll turn up.”

He is
way
too laid-back about all of this. “If this was your money you’d be freaking out too. I guarantee it,” I say, pouting at him. I have every right to be upset.

* * *

I
look
up at the lights blinking haphazardly on and off in the sign that reads ‘Greaseball’ above our heads. Nice to see Matt wining and dining at the finer establishments of the city.

“I know the place looks shady as hell, but just give it a chance. I’m telling you they’ve got the best Italian food.”

I wince at him, unsure of why a place that serves perfectly good Italian food would call themselves something stupid like Greaseball. “Whatever you say.”

“Okay then, follow me princess.”

Matt takes my hand and leads me down the narrow passageway between the bar and the skinny booths on the other side. We make our way into the very back booth where you almost need a flashlight to see the food in front of your face.

“Is it dark enough here for you?” I ask as I scoot in until I’m in the middle of the larger circular booth.

He smirks at me as he slides in next to me. “What can I say? A man likes his privacy.”

I take in the rest of the patrons here at Greaseball’s and have to laugh. With my short black dress and Matt’s stunning dark gray suit, it seems we are woefully overdressed for the occasion.

Which makes me angry about losing my wallet all over again. For some reason Dinah’s conversation from yesterday pops into my head, swirling around the maelstrom of my thoughts. She’s exactly the last thing I want to think about right now, but part of her words seem to stick out of my brain more so now than yesterday when she said them.

‘but just keep your checkbook on hand because it’s going to cost you a pretty penny or two… sad sob story about his family… cost you a pretty penny
…’

I try clear my thoughts from all of that. I don’t know why but it’s sort of hard to let go of what she said. Which is crazy, I know. I stare straight ahead and hope the waiter will be here soon to take our order. Unless we just go into the kitchen and make it ourselves that is.

“Hey, is everything okay?” Matt asks me, his voice soft. “You look like you’ve got a lot on your mind.”

I smile at him, pretending that everything’s fine. “I’m good. I um, wanted to ask you what you recommend to eat here. You did say you used to come here all the time when you were younger.”

We put in our orders—Matt’s eggplant parmigiana and my mushroom risotto—and I lean in to listen to Matt’s latest story about working with Mr. Lewis. Apparently he’s a vet who served in Vietnam, and has asked Matt to commission another piece for him, just like he does every year. I’ve yet to meet him but I hope that I’ll have the chance soon. I love hearing about people’s pasts like that. It’s such a breath of fresh air from the same ‘
Morrissey this and Morrissey
that
’ way of life my father believes in.

“Okay, wow. I’m going to have to agree with you on the risotto. It’s actually really good,” I say around a mouth full of soup. “Mmm.”

He nudges me with his elbow and grins, his eyes dancing. “I hate to say it, but I told you so.”

“Pfft. You don’t hate to say it,” I reply and roll my eyes. “You
love
being right. Who are you trying to kid?”

The dinner is relatively quiet except for all the noise coming from me as I down my soup and bread. Say what you will about the state of Greaseball’s restaurant, but their food is freaking delicious.

I start to relax when I finish up the last of my food, smiling contentedly at Matt. “Thanks for taking me here. I know I was freaking out about my wallet and all. I mean I’m
still
freaked out but thanks for getting my mind off it for a little while. I’ll have to learn to trust your judgment more.”

My words spark something in Matt… I can tell. And when he pushes away his plate and pulls me even closer next to him, I lean my head on his broad shoulder and inhale the scent of him.

Matt’s hand slowly pushes up my thigh even as he oh so casually looks around the corner at the rest of the dingy dive and its patrons. He’s picked the darkest of booths for us to sit in and now I see why.

“What are you doing?” I hiss under my breath, trying to push his hand away.

“It’s okay,” he laughs quietly, edging his fingers even further up my dress. “No one can see us over here.”

The loud noise is enough to drown anything else out, and we’ve already got our food… maybe he’s right. I try to relax and enjoy what my boyfriend is trying to accomplish. It’s been a while since he’s declared me a prude and I don’t want to get him going back down that path again. It was annoying enough then.

I bite my lip when Matt’s fingers rub at the small piece of cotton that separates us. The moan that escapes my mouth as he pushes the fabric aside is louder than I intended, and my eyes flash open wide to make sure no one’s heard me. But everything is as it was—no one could care less about us back here.

“I love seeing how wet I can get you,” he says as he leans his head on my shoulder. I spread my legs open a little wider to give him more space to work with. Pretty soon he’s working his magic on me, and I nearly burst a blood vessel as I try so hard to keep calm as orgasm after orgasm rocks through me. I catch another girl’s eye for a moment but if she suspects anything at least she’s kind enough not to let on.

I take a few deep breaths after, narrowing my eyes at Matt’s grin. “You are insatiable, sir.”

He shakes his head slowly and leans back in, his warm breath ghosting across my face. “Oh princess, you have no idea.”

His words send the most pleasurable chills up and down my spine. When he’s paid the bill, we get up and I make a beeline for the ladies’ room but Matt stops me, nodding towards the kitchen. “This way.”

Puzzled, I follow him until we go out the back exit that takes us to a side-alley. Dead-end.

“Matt, there’s nothing out here. We have to go back the other—”

He shuts me up my pushing me into the brick wall, my elbows scraping against the grimy red stones. He says nothing but devours my mouth with his, his hands grasping at my breasts with the kind of hunger I haven’t seen from him since the first night we were together. My head bounces back against the wall but I don’t care.

I like it. I like when he’s rough with me—it’s like he knows it’s the only way I can completely let myself go. Matt’s pulling my leg over his hip, his hand reaching between us to rip my pair of expensive underwear right off of me. I gasp and he catches the breath I release with his mouth once again, the buckle of his slacks clinking around as he quickly undoes it. I hear the zipper and then I’m being filled to the brim with him, his thick cock pulsing as I swallow him within me. I cry out, feeling like I’m burning from the inside out as Matt rocks steadily against me. His hips roll against mine as he buries his face against my chest and shoulder, his breath coming in fast pants.

I love the way he can’t help himself around me. It should scare me maybe, but truthfully I lose all control around him, too. It’s nice to know the feeling is reciprocated.

I open my mouth knowing it’s possible that I might start screaming, alerting people to what’s going on back here, but I don’t care. I smile instead, drinking in every feeling, every pleasure I’m receiving in this very moment. Matt’s breaking out in a sweat—it’s so fucking warm out here already.

And the sky breaks and decides to give us a blessed reprieve from the heat, the distant sound of thunder rolling while fat drops of rain being to pelt us. I want to laugh at the sheer absurdity of the situation, but Matt’s just so big, so filling. He’s making it his personal mission to fuck the ever-loving hell out of me, and I can’t lend any brain cells to think about anything else but
that.