Luck of the Draw (17 page)

Chapter Eighteen

One month later

Breck sat on the couch in his hotel suite. He’d gotten one with a kitchen. In all the years he’d been traveling for tours, he never gave a shit about a kitchen in his room. Didn’t know why he did now, but maybe he’d want to cook himself something good for dinner. He should have the kitchen here just in case. Even had the stuff for parmesan chicken in the fridge. A month away from her and he was still a sap. Missed the domesticity of a home-cooked meal.

He flipped through all his saved texts like a love-struck teenager. The one where Rowan’d thanked him for calling someone out to look at her generator. He couldn’t believe he’d forgotten it while he was still there. Where she updated him on her appointment.

Given him the due date.

In a little over a month she’d find out if it was a girl or a boy. He already knew it was a girl, but wasn’t sure how.

The thought made him smile. Would she have Rowan’s fiery red hair and personality? What would she get from him? His eyes. His smile. What?

He’d been trying to keep himself busy since he left. The first tournament he’d already had scheduled and then he managed to get another. But it wasn’t working.

Breck’s fingers lingered over the screen to tell her he would be there for the ultrasound. He would. There was no way he would miss it, but he still couldn’t make himself tell her. He was too pissed. Too hurt. Too betrayed.

He still couldn’t figure out what made him think things would be different this time. Rowan might not have stolen his cat, but she stole his heart. and she stomped it to the ground.

She might not have cheated on him, but she’d betrayed his trust even worse. Because he loved her even more.

Damn he was mopey.

Breck tossed his phone onto the couch. If he held it he’d want to look at the texts. He needed to get the hell out of this room. Clear his head, which was one of the reasons he was here.

Poker.

He lost Rowan. Even Ace was snubbing him these days. She didn’t climb up and sit on his lap anymore and if he didn’t know better, he’d think she missed Rowan too. But he still had cards.

His next tournament was in two days. Maybe it was time he broke his own no-women rule. It obviously hadn’t done him much good anyway. Breck went into the room and changed. He’d go out. Meet a woman—a woman he could do nothing but have a good time with and make himself forget all about being in love. It worked with Bailey. It had to work now too.

On the way out, he couldn’t stop himself from grabbing his cell. If she needed him, he wanted to make sure she had a way to get in touch with him.

For the baby.

He was only in the bar for about ten minutes, on his first drink, when the woman approached him. Black hair, long legs. Gorgeous.

“Is this seat taken?” she asked.

“It is now.” Breck pulled out the barstool for her.

She sat down and the bartender approached them. “I’ll have another whiskey. And whatever the lady wants.”

“Allison,” she smiled. “And I’ll take a gin and tonic.” She turned to him. “And you are?”

“Wilder.” Christ it felt weird to use that name again. It was his pick-up name.

“I like it.”

They made small talk for about forty-five minutes. She was a nurse at a hospital. Did she take care of the babies, he’d asked? Breck hadn’t finished his drink. Hadn’t been able to stomach it for some reason, so he rocked it around in the glass.

“This isn’t working for you, is it?” the woman asked. It shocked him. He almost asked what wasn’t, but he knew what she meant. He wasn’t into her. He should be. Breck wanted to be, but he just wasn’t.

“No. I’m sorry. I’m…” It felt too pathetic to say he was in love with someone else.

“Yeah. Me too. My husband passed away six months ago. This is the first time I’ve really gone out. I thought…I thought if I met someone else, it might make me forget.”

“I’m sorry for your loss,” he told her.

“It’s not okay, but it’s not your fault. What about you?”

“I had a one-night stand with a woman who snuck out on me. I accidentally ran into her a month later. We were staying together, became friends, fell in love and then I found out she was pregnant and never told me.”

Allison laughed humorlessly. “Wow. I’m not sure how to respond to that.”

“You and me both.”

“If you still love her, can’t you forgive her?” Allison asked.

Could he? He didn’t know. He hadn’t been able to forgive Bailey. But Rowan wasn’t Bailey. She was everything. She and the baby. “I don’t know. I know that’s a bullshit answer, but I don’t. My first wife… She cheated on me. I tried everything to be what she wanted and she betrayed me with someone else anyway. And now Rowan…the first time I let myself fall for someone else, this happens? That should tell me something.”

He couldn’t believe he was telling this woman so much about himself, but damned if he didn’t need to get it out.

“That’s tough. I can see why you’re upset. Her knowing you’d been through something like that before and not telling you…that’s pretty harsh.”

Breck looked at the brown liquid in his glass. The black bar top. The dimmed lights from brown fixtures. Anywhere but at her. “She didn’t know,” he mumbled.

“What?”

“I didn’t tell her.”

“So you lied to her too?”

“It was different,” he snapped.

“Oh… I’m sorry. I must have misunderstood. I thought you were in love with her. You weren’t? Didn’t want the baby?”

Anger spiked in Breck. “Now wait a damn minute. I didn’t say that. Of course I loved her. I still do and I want nothing more than to have our baby. It’s just—”

“It’s just nothing.” Allison reached out and grabbed his hand. Breck wanted to pull it away because it didn’t feel right, another woman’s hand on his. “My husband was taken away from me. I’d do anything to have him back. It wouldn’t matter if he lied to me—especially if I hadn’t been forthcoming myself. Remember that. You have a chance at a family I never got. Preston died before we could have any children. If you love her, if you love that baby, don’t throw it away.”

Allison turned and downed the rest of her drink. Breck did the same before standing up. He couldn’t get her story out of his head. Rowan out of his head.

“Thank you. Again, I’m sorry for your loss. I wish you all the happiness in the world.”

“Do the right thing. That will make me happy.”

Breck laid a hand on her shoulder. He had a lot of thinking to do. “I’m going to try.”

…

“Thank you! I hope you come again.” Rowan waved good-bye to the guests who were leaving Destiny Knocks. It was a nice couple about her age and their son. They piled into an SUV and she continued to stand there as they drove away.

She sighed. Shivered. It was cold, but she couldn’t make herself leave the doorway. Didn’t want to see the fire burning in the fireplace that would remind her of the carpet picnic with Breck. Wanted the family to come back so she could pretend it’s what they would have: her, Breck. and the baby. Thanksgiving was in a couple days. She wished they could spend it together.

He replied to her texts with,
thanks
,
okay
, etc., but that was all. Oh, and he did send someone out to fix her generator, which had made her burst into tears. The poor electrician probably thought she was crazy.

She missed Breck. The house didn’t feel the same without him. She missed Ace. Even thought about getting a cat, but knew it wouldn’t be the same.

She wanted them. Her family.

Rowan stepped inside when she heard a car pull into the driveway. She looked through the rain, hoping it would somehow be Breck, but it was Jace’s car that stopped in front of her house. He ran inside, briefcase over his head to protect himself from the rain.

“Hey, Freckles,” he said as he made it to the porch. Rowan cocked her head at him. He’d never called her that before. It was the name only Kade and Sidney used for her.

“Hi.” Dread threatened to take hold of her. If he was here, it had to be about Breck. “Come in.”

He wore his typical black suit, wet from the rain. His blond hair still slicked back, like always.

“Want a cup of coffee?” she asked as they went into the dining room.

“No thanks. I don’t have much time. Betsy’s holding down the fort at the office.”

Rowan smiled. “She helps you a lot.”

“It’s her job.” Jace nodded. He sat down and Rowan sat across from him. “Do you really love him?”

She laughed. “Cut straight to the point, why don’t you.”

“I didn’t think you’d appreciate me insulting you by beating around the bush.”

“Then don’t insult me with ridiculous questions. Of course I love him.”

Jace smiled and she had a feeling she’d answered correctly. “He loves you too. Loves that baby as well.” She hadn’t hid her pregnancy after Breck left. She wanted everyone to know about the baby.

“I don’t doubt you on either of those. I know him, Jace. I know he wouldn’t lie about how he feels, but the fact is, I hurt him and love me or not, I’m not sure he can trust me. Not after Bailey.”

Jace sighed and put his elbows on the table. “I met Breck when he was a freshman and we continued to law school together. Used to kick all our asses in poker. Loved it even then. I knew he was married, that when he first started school he had a wife back home, but he planned to bring her there soon. I thought he was crazy for tying himself down that young. Then, when he went home because his mom died, he came back separated. I didn’t know what happened. It had to be something big, but that’s all I knew. Hell, I only found out since he’s been gone and we talked about it.

“Was it okay for him to keep it from you? No. But he still told you. I’ve known him for years and never had the details until now. We’re men, Freckles. It’s not always that easy for us. I can tell you one thing, though: he loves you something fierce. He never told me what went down with Bailey all those years ago, but we talk now and he told me how much he loves you.”

Rowan didn’t meet Jace’s eyes. She was too busy thinking over what he said.

“I’m not telling you what to do because honestly, I’m not only the wrong person for that, but if you guys end up together, I want it to be because it’s what you both want.”

“Then why are you here?” Rowan tried for light, which Jace seemed to understand. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. “Just in case you didn’t have time to Google him.” Jace winked. She was going to
kill
Breck for telling Jace she’d looked Breck up.

Her friend let himself out. Rowan looked at the paper. All it included was the name of a tournament, tomorrow’s date, the time and channel it would be on TV.

She’d one up watching it on TV. She played to win, putting all her money on her family.

Chapter Nineteen

Breck had never played such a cutthroat game of poker in his life. He needed to win this tournament. He had a lot on the line. Breck was betting a lot on love and needed to get on TV afterward to do his interview. And he hoped like hell Rowan would be watching.

They were down to the last couple players. Breck analyzed them. Larry’s eyes darted to his cards, to the players, and then back to his cards. He had nothing.

Breck took in Gordon. The man didn’t fidget. His eyes didn’t wander. Posture straight, obviously trying like hell not to give anything away. That’s when he saw it. The corners of his mouth tilted up slightly. Not much, but enough for Breck to notice and it was like a punch to the gut.

Breck asked for a card. The dealer gave him another. Breck tipped the corner up to look at it. His eyes closed and he exhaled.

Poker face, man. Get yourself under control.

Breck pushed more chips to the center of the table.

“We’re here with Breck Wilder, who walked away the winner tonight. How ya feeling, man?” The reporter held the microphone out to Breck.

“I’m feeling pretty nervous if I’m being honest.” Breck could see the confusion on his interviewer’s face.

“Nervous? Now why don’t I believe that? You’re one of the top ranked poker players in the game. You’ve got some big sponsors and won enough of these things that I can’t see you being nervous about sitting in this chair.”

The man was right. “It’s not that. It’s…Can I have the mic for a second?” Breck took it from him. The lights were in his face. People circled around them. The place was alive with activity, cameras, security. He didn’t care.

“You all know I’m a gambling man. I put everything out there every time I sit at the table. I don’t play it safe, and that’s what makes me win. But the God’s honest truth is…I’m a fake. I take risks in here so I don’t have to take them in my personal life.”

The room was practically silent now, everyone trying to figure out what he was talking about. On national TV, no less.

“I used bullshit—” Oops. That would get bleeped out. “I used excuses to not let myself get close to anyone. Used the past not to move forward, bad luck—you name it and I used it. Then I met this incredible woman.”

There was a collective “Oh!” in the room as though they all just figured out where this was going.

“I used the same excuses with her. Made sure she knew I didn’t want to get close to anyone, because I knew she was the one I could get close to…and then it happened anyway. I fell in love with her, but I wasn’t honest. Still kept myself closed off from her. Then…one mistake from her and I ran. I accused her of things I know aren’t her.”

He took a breath. “I’m not running anymore.”

Breck stared into the TV camera, hoping Rowan was seeing this. “If you’re watching, Houdini, I love you. You’re it for me. You and the baby. And I’m coming home.”

Silence all around him. Finally the man next to him reached for the mic again. “Wow… I’m not sure what to say. We’ve never experienced this before. Houdini?”

Breck laughed. “She’s my magician. My best friend. My fishing buddy. I love her.” Again, he spoke to the camera. To Rowan. “And just wanted to add in, I’m not so bad myself.”

…

Rowan laughed and wiped the tears from her eyes. Her crazy, crazy man. Who’d just admitted to loving her on national TV, but couldn’t stop himself from building up his own ego too. God, she loved him.

Rowan scurried through the lobby of the casino. She smiled at the desk clerk as she slipped by. She’d become like the women from his past. She couldn’t believe she’d bribed someone to find out Breck’s floor.

Couldn’t believe it worked.

Rowan rode the elevator up to the top floor. A suite, of course. She waited in front of his door, her hands shaking like crazy. It was silly. She knew the man loved her. She loved him, but she was still scared to death.

Or maybe it was just excitement.

All sorts of thoughts bounced around in her head. What if he didn’t come up right away? What if he left for home?
What if, what if, what if.

The elevator dinged.

Breck stepped out. He took her breath away. The dark stubble on his face she loved. His happy eyes. Tall, lean, muscular, and hers. There was a flash of momentary confusion on his face, but then he smiled her favorite smile.

“Are you stalking me, Houdini? How’d you find out what room I’m in?”

“I told them I was your wife.” No shame. She held his eyes and yes, another smile.

“I like the way your mind works.”

He reached her, but they didn’t touch, both nervous and unsure how to react. “Come in and talk to me,” he said.

“Thanks.” She followed him. The room was decorated in red and black. Her favorite.

“Reminds me of the kitchen at home.” He tossed his key card down. “The bed and breakfast, I mean.”

“I’m sorry,” they both said at the same time.

Then, they both laughed.

“Can I go first?” Rowan asked. She needed to get this out. Breck nodded.

“I know what I did was wrong. In the beginning I really did want to do the right thing, and then as I got to know you, I was scared…scared if I told you I’d lose you. I couldn’t handle thinking about my life without you, Breck.”

“Sweetheart—” he stepped toward her.

“Wait. I,” Rowan paused. “I wasn’t only scared of losing you. I was scared of you only loving me for the baby. I know that’s horrible and selfish. I wanted you to love the baby and I knew you would, but I wanted you to love me for me too. Not because of anything else…just me. I hate admitting that. I know it’s wrong—”

“It’s not wrong if it’s how you feel.” He’d told her the same words before. “I think that’s understandable. And I’m not going to pretend it didn’t hurt…but I get it.” This time when he stepped closer to her, she let him. Breck wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. “I wasn’t fair to you either. I held back because of Bailey. That wasn’t your fault and I took it out on you. I couldn’t forgive her for what she did, Houdini, but I can’t
not
get over it with you. We belong together. I can’t be without you.

“I love our baby. I can’t wait to start a family with you, but you have to know I love
you,
too. Like I said, you’re it for me. There’s no getting rid of me now.”

“I don’t want to get rid of you.”

Rowan gasped when Breck dropped down on his knee. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring. “I never expected to walk into that bar and fall in love. I never expected to have a family or another wife, but I want all of that with you. You never know what’s going to happen. Life’s a gamble and I’m willing to put it all on us. I used to think I had bad luck with women, but seeing you for the first time? That was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. If I never win another hand in my life, I’m already a winner. I’ve already won the luck of the draw.”

“We…
we’ve
won.” She ran a hand through his hair. “I love you.”

“Marry me.”

“So impulsive.”

“This is the most right decision I’ve ever made.”

“What about your career? Your life?” She needed to ask.

“You and the baby
are
my life. Poker isn’t going anywhere. I can still pick up games from time to time, but I want you. I want our life in Shamrock Falls.”

“Yes.” There was no other option. Nothing she wanted more.

Rowan tried to kneel with him, but he stopped her. Breck’s arms went around her waist, his cheek against her stomach. “What do you think in there, baby? Mommy and Daddy are getting married.” His voice broke as he spoke.

God she loved him. Loved hearing him talk to their child.

Breck looked up at her. “We’re having a baby? Together.” His eyes glistened.

“Yes. I love you.”

Breck stood up and kissed her so passionately her knees went weak.

“Come on,” he said when he pulled away. “Let’s pack, grab Ace and head to Vegas. I can’t wait any longer for you to be my wife.”

Rowan laughed.
“Now?”

“Well it’ll take a while to get to the airport. And to get a flight. Jace, Betsy, Kade, and Sidney are going to have to exchange their tickets. I expected to have to go back to Shamrock Falls first, but—”

“You planned it already?”

“I like to be prepared.”

“And you were so sure I’d say yes?” Was it crazy that she loved he did all this for her?

Breck got serious. “If you’re not ready, I’ll wait. However long it takes.”

Rowan shook her head. She was ready. She grabbed his hand. “Let’s go pack.”

Everything she’d ever wanted was right at the tips of her fingers. She was going to grab on tight, and never let go.