Let Me Just Say This (20 page)

She walked into his office and waited while the pretty young receptionist checked in with him. She asked her to follow her into the back. “Shut the door please,” Matthew said when she entered.

“Very cute young lady.”

“Yes, but not gorgeous like the woman in front of me.”

“You're much too kind.” She said, while holding her head down.

“Take off your glasses, stay a while.” She instantly
started to cry.

“What's wrong?” he asked as he came over to her, trying to lift her face with his hand.

“I'm pregnant.” He gathered her in his arms. He pulled her glasses off and saw the bruise.

“How in the hell did that happen.”

“He hit me. He thinks I had an abortion and he slapped me around a little bit.”

“A little bit? That Motha…”

“Don't…he didn't mean to do it.”

“Do not defend him to me.”

“I'm not,” she whimpered.

“Yes you are. He means it and you can't tell me he doesn't. Why else would you try and cover the bruises up?”

Her hand went to the place on her face and she tried to turn from him.

“It's okay, Cheryl. I'm here.”

He took her into his arms and held her close.

“I'm sorry,” she said, while pulling away from him.

“Nothing to be sorry about. What are you going to do about the baby?”

“I am going to have it. I couldn't go through with the abortion. No matter how I feel about him, I couldn't murder an innocent child. This child doesn't deserve to be put to death because it was conceived this way.”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing.”

“No, not nothing. What do you mean?”

“I shouldn't have said anything,” she said.

“But you did. Now tell me. Does he force you to have sex with him?”

She started bouncing her leg.

“Answer me.”

“Kinda.”

“The answer is either yes or no.”

“Sometimes?”

“How often? Don't protect him,” Matthew said.

“I'm not.” After a short pause, she continued. “I don't know how many times.”

“So if you don't sleep with him, he rapes you?”

“No.”

“Yes Cheryl.”

“I'm his wife for God sakes.”

“When a woman says no, or indicates no, and a man does it anyway, it's called rape. So he rapes you.”

She bolted from the chair. “Stop saying that. I'm his wife and I should be willing whenever he says. That is my responsibility as a wife.”

“Bullshit!” he shouted.

“Let me explain, he does…” she spoke softly

“Stop it!”

“Stop what?”

“Protecting him. He doesn't deserve anything from you but a police report.”

“I won't do that,” she yelled back. Suddenly the door opened.

“Mr. Perry is everything ok?” the receptionist asked.

“I'm sorry Karen, yes, everything is fine.” She closed the door again. Cheryl got up to leave and Matthew stepped in front of her.

“Look Cheryl. Sit down for a minute. I don't like seeing you like this. From the first night I saw you, and the way he was dogging you, I didn't like it. It took all I had not to run up on that nigga.”

“Don't do this.”

“Do what? Tell you how much I care for you. Tell you how I can't get you out of my mind. Tell you that I know you have feelings for me too. Tell you that ever since that kiss we shared, I have wanted you. I have wanted to make love to you, to hold you, to protect you.”

“Stop it! Just stop it.”

“Let me help you. Let me help you leave him. Come with me. You won't have to raise your children alone. I can help you.”

He placed his hand on her stomach. She slapped it away.

“You don't know a damn thing about me, let alone my children. You have no idea.”

“Well tell me what I need to know.”

She stood again to leave.

“I should not have come here. This was a mistake.”

Matthew blocked her path.

“Please move.”

“No, I can't',” Matthew said. She moved to his left and so did he.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Because I care about you.”

“Whatever. How can you care for a person you don't even know. What is this really about? Sex? Do you want to have sex with me? Okay, come on? Let's do it.”

She started unbuttoning her blouse.

He walked back behind his desk.

“Cheryl, stop it. If I had wanted sex, you wouldn't have left me that night when we kissed. Right now, I know you are going through some things, and I want to be your friend, nothing more, but in time, yes, I want to explore the possibilities. Look at me, I care for you and for right now, that will be enough to hold me. Whenever you need me, I will be there for you. Take this.”

He reached in his desk and held out another business card. “Every number that I use is on this card. Use them whenever you need me.”

She took the card and placed it in her pocket. He leaned forward, taking her hand in his.

“I mean it, just call me and I will be there, no questions asked.” He touched her face and then drew his hand away quickly “Let's sit down and discuss how you could get this man out of your life.”

“Do you know a hit man?” she said.

“I might,” he said.

“Jeez, I'm only kidding,” she said through a half smile.

Kevin was home fuming. He knew she went to get an abortion, the P.I. told him that, and now she was nowhere to be found. It turned his stomach to know that Cheryl would bear his next child and not Rebecca. No matter, he would deal with that later.

Cheryl stopped by Dee's house and told her about her conversation with Matthew.

“You do know that Kevin will kill you if he finds out you are cheating on him.”

“What? Who said anything about cheating? I haven't slept with the man.”

“No, but he is not your husband and you are sharing things with him that you should be sharing with your husband. Mainly how you feel about this child. I'm your girl, if you need anyone to talk to, you talk to me.”

“Dee, you just don't know.”

“Then tell me.”

“Kevin, well, he is becoming more violent. Anything sets him off. On a weekly basis, hell sometimes daily. It's getting worse. Look at my face, he did this today. He wants me to carry this child and he doesn't even know how to keep his hands to himself. He asks me for a divorce and now all of a sudden, he wants to be a father. Give me a break.”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I am going to keep this child, but I will leave before it's born. I can't keep going through this. I just can't.”

Both women started to cry and Dee tried to comfort her friend.

Still sitting in the living room floor with her friend, Cheryl wiped her eyes and stood and headed for the door.

Dee grabbed her friend and hugged her, “I'm here for you girl, no matter what. Just be careful when it comes to your friend.”

Cheryl broke the embrace, “What do you mean by that?

“I mean, you know, your friend might want something other than friendship.”

Cheryl backed away, “See where your mind automatically goes.”

“No, I just mean, I know how men are.” Dee said holding her hands up defensively.

“And how are they?” Cheryl said with her arms folded

“They will say what you want to hear, and then they want the panties.”

“For your information, little miss know it all, he only wants to be my friend. I even offered myself to him and he was offended that I would even think he was like that. Do you have so little faith in me?” Cheryl said.

Dee blew out a breath before speaking “I didn't mean it like that.”

“Yes you did. You think I am some helpless baby, who can't distinguish between good and evil. Well I will have you know that I can distinguish between my friends and someone who is jealous.”

“Jealous? Jealous of who…you? Please. You think I want to be you? You, who has a husband that cheats on you, whose husband calls you names, whose husband beats her ass and comes and goes as he pleases? Yeah, no thanks.” Dee said without taking a breath.

Cheryl opened the door and let it swing open.

Cheryl walked in the house and walked by Kevin like she didn't see him. She did notice that his face was tight.

“Care to tell me where you have been?”

“Nope.”

“Oh really. You're going to say that to me?” he said but she continued past him.

She went into the library and wanted to read. Something that always calmed her down and boy did she need something to settle the nerves. She was cried out, pissed off and tired.

“We need to talk about a few things.” Kevin said as he walked into the library.

“We don't need to talk about anything.”

“Yes we do. We need to discuss what you are going to do about being pregnant. I think…”

“Oh, you think. Isn't that rich? Well I will tell you what. No need for you to think about anything. Things are already taken care of.”

“And what does that mean?”

“Just like it sounds.” She stood to leave the library.

“Stop talking in riddles and tell me what the hell is going on.”

“I don't need to tell you shit! You never tell me anything. Now you wanna be all up in my face, because you want to be a daddy. How about you be a daddy to the kids you already have! Screw you Kevin. You weren't acting like you
wanted to be a daddy a month ago. You the one acting like you a single man. You barely even come home anymore. You could give a flying fuck about me, this baby or the kids.

Kevin's voice came out as a shriek.

“How dare you try and put the destruction of this marriage on me!”

“And why not?” she asked gasping, “You are out there with another woman. Not once have I ever thought about cheating on you. God knows I could have, so many times before, but did I, no, I stayed faithful. Why? Because I thought that if I did, you would see just how lucky your stupid ass was to have someone like me. Boy was I wrong. You only care about one thing, and that is you and that bitch you are screwing.”

Kevin lunged at her, catching her off guard. They fell to the floor with him on top of her.

“Don't you ever call her that again? Do you hear me?”

“You're crazy,” she screamed.

“I sure am,” his hands tightened around her neck. She fought to keep him from tightening his grip. “You fucking bitch!” he shouted.

Suddenly his hands left her neck and he stood. She staggered to her feet, holding her neck and coughing.

“I won't let you do this again, I won't.”

She ran for the phone on the desk.

“Who do you think you're calling?”

“Get away from me.”

He pulled the jack from the wall, and grabbed her by the hair.

“Stop it!”

He slapped her hard across her face. She tried running from the room and shutting the door, but he was right there with her. By the time he had finished her eyes were swollen.

“I suggest you think the next time you get your ass on your shoulders,” he said, breathing hard. “If you think I will stand around and let you come and go as you please, you
are sadly mistaken; furthermore, if you even think about killing my child, I will do the same to you. Do you understand me? Do you?”

She lay there in a heap on the floor. She heard him throwing glasses and slamming things in the kitchen. She heard him enter the garage. She was hopeful he was leaving. She dragged herself onto the bed and closed her eyes.

Night had fallen and she finally woke up. Her head was killing her and the lights were not on in the house. She got up and felt around in the dark. She walked into the bathroom and turned on the lights. The lights illuminated all of the flowers in the room. This certainly was not going to stop her from calling the cops on his sorry ass. No matter what he did this time, she was not putting up with this anymore.

She heard a noise downstairs. “Sweetheart, are you awake?” he called.

She went back and climbed into bed.

“You need to eat,” he said as he walked in with a tray of food.

“I'm not hungry.”

“The baby might be,” he said. “So eat.”

He sat the tray down when he heard the doorbell ring. “Just eat, I'll get it.”

She stared at the tray of food as long as she could then pushed it to the floor.

Kevin came running up the stairs.

“Are you alright?” he asked, unaware that Dee was behind him.

“What the fuck happened? What did he do to you?”

Dee wrapped her arms around her. Cheryl looked at Kevin then turned her head.

“Nothing. I fell downstairs. You know with the pregnancy and all, I got dizzy.”

Dee looked at her and leaned in for a hug. She whispered, “Why are you protecting him?” she looked away.

Dee got up and ran up on Kevin, “You piece of shit. You did this didn't you? I'm calling the cops.”

“Sweetie, you will be so embarrassed when Cheryl tells them what really happened.”

“Just look at her,” she screamed and came back to Cheryl, “she looks like she went three rounds with you.”

“Dee, I'm fine. I'm a little tired. I'll call you tomorrow,” she said, while trying to convince her friend, that she had it all under control. Kevin came and grabbed her by the arm.

“You need to leave,” he said sweetly. “The doctor said she needs to rest.”

As he led her downstairs, she could hear Dee, “I know you did this, and she is too scared to say anything. How could you hit her, knowing she's pregnant?”

“I don't know what you are talking about. I will tell Cheryl that you will call her later, ok? Bye.” He pushed her in the back and slammed the door.