Let It Snow (The Hope Falls Series) (18 page)

Understanding flashed on his handsome features. His eyebrows lifted as his gaze dropped to the floor. He placed his hands in his pockets and rocked back slightly on his heels.

He looked unsure of himself, which was very un-Jake-like. It was starting to make Tessa a little nervous—well, more nervous than she already was being alone with Jake!—when he looked up and asked, “Do you want to get a pizza?”

Those were probably the last words that she’d expected to come out of Jake’s mouth. Okay, well maybe not the
last
words, but they did surprise her nonetheless. “Sure,” she agreed automatically.

“Do you mind if we go to my condo? I need to let Lucky out.”

“Yes, that’s great!” she said, perhaps a little too eagerly. But she couldn’t help it. She wanted to see where Jake lived. And there was the added bonus of getting to see Lucky. She’d formed an instantaneous bond with that handsome guy when he’d curled up beside her after she’d passed out.

At her lightning fast response Jake’s lips parted and his perfectly white teeth shone in a smile that she hadn’t seen on his face since she’d been back in Hope Falls. It was one of her favorite smiles. It was his you-are-the-cutest-thing-to-ever-walk-this-planet smile. Every time he’d flashed it, she’d felt like the luckiest, most special girl in the world. Right now was no exception.

After closing up both houses, Jake insisted on driving them both, which she’d thought was ridiculous because then he’d just have to drive her back home tonight.

Unless he planned on her staying with him tonight.

Oh boy. Just when she felt the butterflies in her stomach beginning to wage a full-on wing-war of flutters, he said from beside her, “So how have you been? Really?” His tone was even and serious.

In an instant, her excited nervousness turned to dread. She knew he’d added the “really” because he didn’t want her to answer with a generic “good” or “fine.” He honestly wanted to know how she’d been.
Really
.

Tears began filling her eyes, but she instantly tried to blink them away. There was no reason for her to get emotional. Her life hadn’t been
that
bad. It hadn’t been easy but it could have been a lot worse.

Instead of trying to spin it through her deeply embedded glass-half-full filter or give in to the woe-is-me emotional wave she was riding at the moment, she decided to go the “just the facts, ma’am” Joe Friday Dragnet route. “Well the last six years have been a challenge. Gran’s dementia progressed rapidly. She was initially misdiagnosed with Alzheimer’s, but within a few months, they changed her diagnosis to vascular dementia.” Tessa let out a forced laugh, “Which is basically all the fun of Alzheimer’s with the added bonus of strokes.

“I took her out of the retirement home she’d moved into after leaving Hope Falls and tried to care for her at home. I stopped traveling, gave up my position at Time, and didn’t take on any freelance work that took me out of Southern California. I hired two nurses to care for her in shifts when I was on a shoot. That lasted for a while. Up until the night I woke up to find that she’d walked right out the front door and it took us four hours to find her. I knew then I was not equipped to care for her.”

Tessa sniffed and felt Jake’s large hand cover hers where it rested on the center console. As much as she appreciated the comforting gesture, she didn’t want him to feel sorry for her. She’d managed.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, sadness filling his voice as he brushed his hand over hers.

She shook her head and pulled her lips up into a smile. “It’s fine. It took three different assisted living homes before I found one that I was happy with the care she received. So for the last few years I just worked locally. Weddings mostly. I sold my condo and moved in with a roommate, and if I wasn’t working, I spent my time at Ocean Gardens with Gran.”

“Where are your parents? Didn’t they help?” Jake asked.

Tessa looked out the window. She didn’t want him to see the tears that were forming in her eyes. “After Germany, Dad retired and they decided to move to Belgium. They call on my birthday and Christmas, but other than that, I don’t hear from them.”

“Damn, Tessa, I’m so sorry.” Jake’s voice, his touch, all should have been a comfort, but somehow were just making her feel more alone. Because she knew that she couldn’t get used to it.

This time in Hope Falls was just a small reprieve from her life. A hiatus. A vacation from reality. She needed to remember that.

‡

J
ake could see Tessa yawning out of the corner of his eye. He knew that the right thing to do, the gentlemanly thing to do, would be to take her home. But he didn’t want to. And if that made him a selfish prick, he decided he could live with that.

Tonight had been one of the best nights he could ever remember having. After Tessa had opened up to him on the way over, he’d made it his personal mission to make sure that she had a night where she could just be. So they’d ordered a pizza and played with Lucky, and now were now lounging on the couch, watching movies.

And as hard—literally and figuratively!—as it was to be near her and not touch her, kiss her, make love to her, tonight had reminded Jake of the other reason that he’d been so devastated when Tessa had disappeared from his life. He’d not only lost the girl he loved more than life itself, he’d lost his best friend too.

Tessa was hilarious and smart. She always called him on his shit. The optimistic way she looked at life was contagious.

“Oh my gosh,” Tessa said as another—loud—yawn escaped her. She lifted her hands over her head and moaned as she stretched like a cat. Her back arched, and with her hands raised, the hem of her shirt pulled up, revealing the fair skin on her stomach. Lowering her arms, she snuggled into the corner of the couch and tucked socked feet underneath her. “I can’t stop yawning.”

“Because you’re exhausted,” Jake said, pointing out the obvious.

A smile appeared on her face as her big blue eyes peeked up under dark lashes, looking over her shoulder at him. “Ya think?”

Damn, she was so cute. Jake wasn’t sure what he was going to do when she left again, but right now he was really enjoying the fact that she was here. In his condo. Beside him. And he knew that it would be all kinds of bad if he touched her the way he
really
wanted to, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t touch her at all.

“Come here,” he said as he grabbed a throw pillow that was beside him and placed it on his lap.

Her eyes widened, and for the first time tonight, she didn’t seem completely calm and relaxed. She probably had no idea what his intentions were. And to be honest, he wasn’t totally clear on them himself. Jake just knew he needed to touch her.

“Come here,” he repeated, patting the striped pillow that lay on his thigh.

Slowly, she pushed off the armrest where her head had been resting on the other side of the couch. Sitting up, she looked at him as her chest rose and fell rapidly. She nervously licked her lips.

Jake was sure as hell glad that he’d grabbed the pillow because his body’s reaction to the way that she was looking at him, her labored breathing, and the sensuous sight of her licking her lips would have been clearly visible if he hadn’t. He wasn’t sure what she was going to do. Of course, he knew if he wanted to, all it would take was reaching out and pulling her to him and she would be putty in his hands.

The day he’d found her passed out, the night he’d given her a ride home, earlier that morning in the driveway—all it would have taken any one of those times from Jake was one kiss and it would have been game, set, match.

But this was different. They weren’t face to face, mere inches away from each other. They weren’t even touching. Of course there was sexual tension between them—as always—but he wanted to see if she trusted him and herself enough to just be close to him.

His body was strung tight with need, but that’s not what this was about. This was just about needing to be close to her. His arousal was going to have to take a back seat for once. It wasn’t happy about it, but Jake needed…connection.

Taking a deep breath, Tessa lowered onto the pillow and laid her hand gently on his thigh. Jake let out a breath of relief as he began running his fingers through her soft hair.

She moaned at his touch and his hard-on grew harder than he’d even thought was humanly possible. Looking down at her as the light from the television flickered off her face, he was mesmerized by her beauty. His eyes roamed over her delicate jawline, the sexy slope of her neck, her gorgeous profile. He felt overwhelmed. Not just with how badly he wanted the girl lying on his lap, but also with how much he loved her.

“That feels so good,” Tessa said, her voice sounding sleepy as her eyes grew heavier.

“Does it?” Jake heard the need in his voice.

“Hmm mmm,” she murmured her confirmation.

Knowing he might not like the answer but having to ask anyway, he said, “So what’s the plan? Did Lauren give you any idea how long the sale might take?”

“Nope, she didn’t. There are still a couple of big repairs to be done. And caring for Gran the last few years ate up my savings so I’m gonna stay here and work part-time until I make enough money to finish the house and put it up for sale.” Tessa’s voice was growing quieter and her languid blinks were becoming longer and longer.

“Where are you working?” Jake asked. She’d only been in town a few days, and he hadn’t heard about her getting any job.

“Um, I asked Mary if she had any jobs that she could throw my way,” Tessa said as she shut her eyes and didn’t open them again.

Oh, that made sense. She’d worked for Say Cheese in high school and Jake knew how much she’d loved it then.

“And I was going to see if I could pick up shifts at Sue Ann’s, but today Levi said that he could use some help at the bar so I’m gonna work a few nights a week at JT’s…” Her voice trailed off and her breathing slowed.

Jake continued raking his fingers through her hair, mainly because he couldn’t help himself. As much as he didn’t like the idea of Tessa working in a bar, he did like the fact that she’d said she was going to work a few nights a week. It indicated that she planned on being here for weeks—plural!

Eric’s words kept echoing in Jake’s head. “
You need to talk to her
…
She was a kid too when she lost a baby she didn’t even know she was carrying.”

Maybe his brother was right. Now that Jake knew that she was going to be sticking around for a little while at least, he should just talk to her. See where her head was at now.

Jake knew that his brother was definitely right on one count—he needed to deal with this. The only thing he was worried about was making sure that things didn’t get physical between them. Because if that happened, he didn’t think he could handle it when she left. Again.

‡

“J
ake, are you sure about this?” Tessa fidgeted in the seat beside him.

“For the twentieth time, yes,” Jake assured her. He hated seeing her stressed again. Today had been perfect. After she’d woken up on his couch that morning, he’d made her breakfast and then taken her back to the Shady Lane house so she could shower. They’d spent the day taping off rooms at her grandma’s house to get it ready to paint.

Lucky had come with them and had not left Tessa’s side. They’d played music and Tessa had even danced with Lucky, who had barked happily while standing on his back legs, his paws resting on Tessa’s shoulders.

Days like today were how Jake had pictured his life. He’d never cared about being rich or famous. All he’d wanted were days exactly like today.

“I can stop by and see your parents another time. It doesn’t have to be for Sunday dinner.”

“Listen, my mom has laid down the law. She’s pissed that no one told her about the work day yesterday and wants to see you,” Jake had mixed feelings about Tessa being at Sunday dinner. As happy as he was that Tessa was here now, sitting beside him, he knew that, once she sat down at their family table, Sunday dinners would never be the same again.