Lesser Gods (32 page)

Terry replied in a monotone, “Like I said, Adrian, no more adventures.”

I faced her and said firmly, “No one in this house blames you for what happened to me, Terry.”

“You’re wrong, Adrian.” I heard Terry let out a quiet sob. “Because I do.”

“But this is your home, Terry.”

“Not anymore.”

“Coward,” I whispered.

“What?”

“I said you’re a coward, Terry!” I shouted in fury. “You can’t stand to look at me!”

Terry’s voice cracked. “Maybe I am a coward.”

I had been hoping for a hard smack in the face. This was much worse. Terry, who never backed away from a fight in her entire life, was suddenly as hollow as the coldest winter night.

When I finally found my voice, I asked quietly, “Where will you go?”

“New Haven isn’t the only Guardian settlement, Adrian,” said Terry. “Besides, I’m not even psionic yet, so no one can track me down. I’ll find a place.”

I considered shouting for Cindy, but I knew that Terry’s mind was made up. If I stopped her today, she’d just leave tomorrow.

“You haven’t even said goodbye to Alia,” I said.

“Well, I wasn’t planning on saying goodbye to you either,” replied Terry. “I’m not good at goodbyes.”

That feeling I understood, and I gave her a faint smile.

Terry’s hand touched my left shoulder. “Take care of yourself, Half-head.”

I gave her arm a squeeze. “You too, Five-fingers.”

I followed Terry’s footsteps into the living room. The front door opened, and then shut quietly. I stood motionless, breathing slowly and wishing that this was all just a bad dream.

“Addy?”
said Alia inside my head.
“What’s going on?”

“Where are you?” I asked into the darkness.

“Here,”
said Alia, tapping lightly on the wall near the corridor.
“I heard the front door. What’s going on?”

I couldn’t bring myself to say it aloud, but Alia didn’t ask again. Instead, she gently took my hand and walked me back to our room. I sat silently with her at our window-side seat, staring out into the nothingness to which I had become so accustomed. I tried not to think of how weak Terry had sounded. I didn’t want to remember her that way, but I knew that something had broken inside her. Perhaps Cindy was right in that Terry wished for my recovery even more than I did. It seemed strange, but that was Terry, and now she was gone.

When I woke the next morning, I was still sitting in the chair with Alia, and over breakfast, I told both her and Cindy what had happened. Cindy showed no surprise at the news of Terry’s departure.

While Cindy understood why I hadn’t woken her or tried to force Terry to stay, my sister did not. Fortunately, Cindy dealt with Alia for me so I could concentrate on trying to swallow a breakfast that I wasn’t hungry for.

“Because Terry is older, Alia,” Cindy replied patiently in response to a telepathic question. “She’s sixteen, and she’s not my child. Her Uncle Charles gives her free reign to come, go and do as she pleases.”

Alia continued to talk to Cindy telepathically. I knew she wasn’t trying to hide anything from me. Even though my sister’s spoken voice was beginning to sound almost natural these days, she still relied on her telepathy whenever she was upset and didn’t want to concentrate on mouth movements. Alia wasn’t crying, at least not audibly, but I could tell by her irregular breathing that she was on the verge.

“I know how much you love her,” said Cindy, probably hugging Alia tightly enough to interrupt her circulation. “Terry cares just as much about you too. She couldn’t say goodbye because it hurt her too much, and she’ll come back someday.”

Alia seemed to relax a bit.

“I’m sure of it, sweetie,” said Cindy. “Terry just needs some time to herself. She’ll be missing you and Addy before the end of the day, and when she misses you enough, she’ll be back.”

Alia said something else, and Cindy replied, “No, Ali, probably not today or tomorrow. You just be patient like your brother.”

I realized that I had, indeed, finally learned my patience. Why else would I have let Terry leave like that?

Cindy gave Alia a break from her studies that day, and the three of us spent much of the day outdoors, shopping, walking, and half-heartedly playing in the park. The November wind was beginning to bite at our cheeks, but worse was the constant, unpleasantly cold reminder of an absent voice.

Though I had neither the intention nor the means of looking for Terry or dragging her back to New Haven, I was curious as to where she had gone and whether she was alright. I asked Cindy to call up Laila Brown for me and arrange a meeting.

The next day after school hours, Laila met me in the lobby of NH-1. As the evenings were getting a bit too cold for strolls through the park, we went across the street to a small cafe that had opened there last year.

“Where’s your sister today?” asked Laila as she opened the door for me.

“Cindy’s helping her with her homework,” I replied. “Actually, in our case, it’s all homework, but you get the idea. Why?”

“It’s just so strange not seeing her next to you.”

I chuckled. “Alia wanted to come but Cindy wouldn’t let her.”

We sat at what Laila told me was a corner table where we could talk openly without being overheard. The shop was run by the Guardians and outsiders rarely came in, but there was always the possibility of being overheard by an Angel spy.

In order to protect Terry on the road to wherever she was heading, the official Guardian line was that Terry had suffered a horrible training accident, leaving her paralyzed and bedridden in the penthouse. There was no telling how long such a cover story would hold up, but hopefully the Angels wouldn’t be too interested in Terry now that they no longer had any leverage on her.

Laila ordered coffees for the both of us.

“You do drink coffee, don’t you, Adrian?” she asked.

“Sure,” I lied. “All the time.”

The service was quick.

“Sugar? Milk?” asked Laila as the cups were placed on our table.

“Black is fine,” I said, taking a sip and instantly regretting it. “Maybe a cube of sugar.”

Laila added sugar to my coffee for me, and we spent a minute or two drinking silently. I sipped my still-bitter coffee very slowly.

“So,” sighed Laila, “Terry...”

“Yeah,” I said, sighing too. “Terry... You wouldn’t happen to know where she’s going, would you?”

“Only guesses, none of them intelligent,” Laila answered apologetically.

“I just wish I could write her a letter. See if I can’t get it through her thick skull that she didn’t have to leave New Haven on my account.”

“You really like her, don’t you, Adrian?”

“She was a good friend,” I said quietly. “One of my very few friends since I turned psionic.”

“I’m going to miss her too,” Laila said sadly. “I know this is the last thing you need right now. Terry is usually so strong.”

“She was so disappointed that I wouldn’t be able to fight for the Guardians anymore.”

“It must be difficult for the both of you,” Laila said sympathetically. “You might have made a great Knight someday.”

“I doubt it, Laila,” I said, giving her a wry smile. “After all, I’m only in this stupid war to get my sister back from the Angels.”

“You don’t care if the Guardians win or lose?” Laila asked in a startled tone.

“Well, I care, to a point,” I replied evasively.

Laila said teasingly, “I’m guessing God isn’t the only thing you don’t believe in.”

“I don’t believe in werewolves, vampires, fairies, ghosts, UFOs, magic or fate, to name a few.”

Laila laughed. “I always thought of psionics as a sort of magic.”

I shook my head. “I’m sure there’s some science behind it that we just don’t understand yet. Nothing ever happens without cause.”

“In a way, you’re much like Terry, Adrian. So down-to-earth it’s almost painful.”

I shrugged. “I admit when I first gained my power, I thought it was something special. Something magical. Maybe even the beginning of something wonderful. And in a way, it was, but... Well, you know that my parents were killed, and my sister was converted by Larissa Divine, same as your father.”

“Would you tell me about your sister? About Cat?”

“I never told you?” I asked in surprise. I thought that I had told Laila about Cat long ago.

Laila remained silent.

“Laila?” I asked, wondering what was the matter.

Suddenly Laila laughed, saying, “No. I mean, you never told me.”

“Why are you laughing?”

“I’m sorry, Adrian,” Laila said between giggles. “I’m just so stupid sometimes. I was shaking my head, thinking you could see me. You’d think I would have learned by now.”

“Oh,” I said, laughing too. “I really wish I could see you, Laila.” It took me a few seconds before I realized how that must have sounded. I added embarrassedly, “You know, I mean, if I could see you...”

“You’d know it when I shook my head,” said Laila, still laughing.

“Yeah,” I said, staring down at the table. I didn’t want Laila to see my expression, which probably looked as uncomfortable as I felt.

“So,” said Laila, “would you tell me about her?”

“Sure,” I said, happy to be back on a normal conversation. “But on one condition.”

“Death if I tell anyone?” Laila asked innocently.

I chuckled. “No. Actually...” I paused, trying to find the right words to say this without actually saying it.

“Yes?”

“Well, you know Alia’s really feeling down about Terry and... well, Alia likes you a lot and... I – I know you probably have other friends at school who’ll be only too happy that Terry’s out of your life but...” My mouth wasn’t even stammering the right words, and I just ended by mumbling, “It would, um, be nice if we could all still be friends.”

I felt Laila touch my right hand. “Adrian, I’m truly shocked. We
are
friends, and nothing’s going to change that. Even if Ms. Gifford hadn’t called, I was planning on visiting you today to make sure you and Alia were alright.”

“I just thought with all the trouble you’ve been through on Terry’s account...”

“Nobody chooses my friends for me,” Laila said forcefully, giving my hand a gentle squeeze.

“I remember you said that once about Terry,” I said, pulling my hand free and holding my coffee cup in both hands.

“Well, now I’m saying it about you, Adrian. I’m really mad at Terry for running off like this, and I hope she comes to her senses, but meanwhile we can definitely still be friends.” Laila paused for a moment and then added in a hesitant tone, “That is, if that’s what you want.”

Another uncomfortable silence. My coffee had cooled just enough to gulp, so I did.

In fact, I had caught myself thinking a lot about Laila since around my birthday, and “friends” wasn’t exactly how I pictured our relationship. I remembered how Terry had claimed that Laila felt the same way about me, and all I’d have to do was ask. But getting myself to ask was like trying to levitate New Haven One while wearing a suit of armor. My mouth just wouldn’t form the words.

Instead, I killed the silence by telling Laila about Cat. Laila in turn told me a bit more about her father, and how she feared that he might already have been killed in some battle with the Guardians or another faction. We talked about Terry, and about our takes on the possible outcomes of the Angel-Guardian war.

We had a donut and a second cup of coffee each, and I insisted on paying the bill. Leaving the coffee shop, Laila walked me back across the street to the entrance of NH-1.

“I’d love to say hello to Alia, Adrian,” said Laila, “but I still have a ton of homework waiting. I’ll come over tomorrow or Saturday at the latest, okay?”

“That’d be great, Laila,” I said. “It’s, uh... it’s good to have a friend.”

Suddenly I felt a light peck on my left cheek, and I said uncertainly, “We are, um, friends, right, Laila?”

Laila giggled nervously. “Very good friends, Adrian.”

“I like that,” I said over the thumping of my erratically beating heart. “Very good friends.”

I felt Laila’s nose brush lightly against mine, and then our lips touched for the briefest, and yet longest, of instances.

“See you, Adrian!” Laila called out before I even realized we were no longer kissing. I heard Laila sprint away down the sidewalk. It might have been a full five minutes before I had recovered enough of myself to find my way into the building.

When I returned to the penthouse, Cindy said to me from somewhere near the center of the living room, “So, did Laila know about Terry?”

“Um... yeah... I mean no,” I replied, still in a daze over what had just happened.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” I lied quietly.

I wasn’t exactly sure how I felt. I was still coming to grips with the fact that I had just kissed Laila Brown. Or rather, she had kissed me. But then, so had I kissed her. Terry had been gone less than forty-eight hours, and the purpose of my chat with Laila had been purely to ascertain Terry’s destination. What had just happened? I felt awful about my sudden happiness. I knew I shouldn’t feel so great, even embarrassedly great, when Alia was still upset, as I certainly should be, over Terry’s disappearance. And I
was
upset over Terry’s disappearance, just as much as Cindy, Alia and Laila were. Post-traumatic stress disorder wasn’t nearly as maddening as what was going through me now. I wasn’t feeling up one moment and feeling down the next. I was up and down at the same moment.

“Adrian?” said Cindy, coming closer. “What happened to you?”

“Nothing,” I whispered softly.

No doubt Cindy would find out soon enough anyway. And then what would Alia say? Would she tease me again like she had when she claimed that Terry was my girlfriend? I realized that I didn’t care. Alia could say whatever she wanted. I was more worried about what I was going to say to Laila the next time we met.

Cindy said worriedly, “Obviously
something
happened, Adrian. I haven’t seen you so spaced out since, well, forever.”

“There’s a first to everything,” I mumbled, leaving the living room and heading down the corridor. I could hear the shower running, which meant my bedroom would be Alia-free, so I quickly entered and sat down at the window.