Laces and Lace (Assassins #6) (51 page)

“First time leaving, huh?”

Lacey turned suddenly to see Elli with her mass of children. The three boys ran circles around her while the girls stood just as pretty as their mommy, holding her hands.

“Yeah,” she said with a nod. “It’s hard.”

Elli smiled. “Yeah, I used to act like he was leaving for good, but now, I can say bye without the tears. So do the kiddos, huh?”

“Daddy will be back soon,” the tallest one said. Her eyes were bright and so beautiful.

“He goes to win hockey for us,” her sister said, a sweet little grin on her face.

“They love their daddy,” Elli said with a nod. “Once you two have children, watching him leave won’t be so hard ’cause you’ll have the kids to keep you busy.”

Lacey’s heart ached as she slowly nodded. “Yeah.”

“Anyway, I stopped to tell you to call me if you need anything. If you want to come over and watch a movie with me and my crew, you’re more than welcome to. You’re always welcome at the Adler casa.”

“Thank you, Elli. That means a lot to me,” Lacey said and it did. She didn’t think they had clicked when they first met, but maybe she was wrong. Elli was really nice.

“Anytime! This coming Friday, the girls and I are getting together for a wives-only night to watch the game, drink wine, and just spend time together without our kids. You should come!”

“Yeah, just send me a reminder,” Lacey said, but she didn’t think she would go to that. When it was just her and Elli, it was fine, but when she was surrounded by everyone, it was weird. She felt like an outsider, and she didn’t like feeling like that.

“Of course, hang in there, lady. He’ll be home in no time. Two weeks is nothing, but the month-long ones suck!”

“Month-long ones?” she asked in horror and Elli smiled.

“Yeah, but don’t worry, we wives stick together.”

“Thanks a lot,” she said, returning the smile as Elli nodded.

“Okay, well, I’ll let you get home. Call me anytime.”

“I will,” she said, even though she knew she wouldn’t. Elli was very nice, and she knew she meant well, but she didn’t know Elli like she knew, say Rachel. With her husband on that plane, she was officially completely alone in Nashville.

And that didn’t sit well with her at all.

K
arson was worried about Lacey.

He wasn’t sure if it was his imagination or if she really was as miserable as she sounded. Every time he talked to her, she didn’t seem like herself. She was very short with her answers and mostly let him do the talking. It was weird. She was usually so full of life, and he didn’t know what to do to make it better. It was killing him. He shouldn’t feel bad for having to leave her, but he did, and he wasn’t sure what to do about it.

For the first time in years, he was actually considering retiring. He always thought he would play until he was old and unable to move, but after spending so many years away from her, he realized that maybe he should retire. It would give him time to be with her, start a family, and live a life with her, but as soon as the thought came to mind, he knew he couldn’t do it. He lived for hockey, and while, yes, he lived now for Lacey, she was going to have to adjust.

This was his career, the way he was going to give her everything she could ever need. He would put their children through school on this salary and travel the world with it. As hard as it was on both of them, they would survive. They loved each other more than anything in this world, and some time apart was always good. It made coming home and being together even more precious. They would just need to adjust, and then everything would be fine.

When his phone rang, he looked down, hoping it was Lacey, but still pleased to see it was his mom. If anyone would know what to do, it would be Regina King.

“Ma, what’s up?”

“Hey sweetheart, just calling to check in.”

“That’s cool, how are you?”

“Good, my hip’s been acting up. It’s a little suspect, I think.”

“Damn suspect hips, I have one myself,” he said with a grin and she laughed.

“We are getting old, my dear.”

“We are. It’s sad.”

“It is,” she laughed. “How’s LA?”

“It’s LA,” he answered with a grimace.

“That sounds nice. Are you busy? Out sight-seeing?”

He let out a breath, running his fingers through his hair. “I’m in the hotel.”

“Why? Aren’t the boys out? Isn’t that what you guys do?”

“It is,” he said, closing his eyes and squeezing them tight.

“Okay? Why aren’t you? Are you sick? What’s wrong?”

“No, it’s not that, Ma,” he said, opening them and shaking his head. “I just feel like an asshole out enjoying the city with Lacey at home, alone.”

“Why is she alone? Has she not made friends yet?” she asked as he leaned back in the bed.

“Nope, not yet. I know that my boss has invited her out, but she hasn’t gone. I don’t know. I feel bad, you know?”

“Well, I can see that, but it’s part of being a hockey wife, Karson. She’ll be fine. She’s a strong girl,” his mother said, making him feel somewhat better, but still something kept him from completely committing to the idea of Lacey being fine.

“I don’t know, Ma. I mean, I even considered retiring; that’s how worried about her I am.”

“Karson, that’s insane. She’ll be fine. You’re treating her like a damn precious jewel. She’ll be fine.”

“She is, though, but it’s not only that. She isn’t acting like Lacey. It makes me nervous that she’s gonna hightail it back to Chicago before I can even get home.”

His mother tsked him, making him feel like he was nine again before saying, “You need to get that notion out of your head. That girl isn’t going anywhere. She is completely committed to you, honey. This is the first time you two are apart since getting married. It will get easier.”

“But what if I’m not worth waiting on?” he asked, almost in a whisper. He knew he could say anything to his mother and she wouldn’t judge him at all. Neither would his father, but he would take his fair share of name-calling before Karl actually consoled him.

“Karson, baby, come on,” she said, and he could almost see her shaking her head. “You don’t believe that, do you?”

“I don’t know, I’m just nervous. I went nine years without this woman and now I have her, and I swear, Ma, it seems like a dream. It freaks me out that, at any moment, I can wake up and she’ll be gone. I don’t deserve her. I hurt her, broke her heart, and somehow she decided to take me back. But now I’m going to be gone all the time. How is that fair to her?”

He took in a deep breath and was surprised how much he was holding in. He didn’t realize how insecure he was of their relationship. He was always so confident in front of Lacey, but when it was just him and his mom, the truth came out. He was scared. He didn’t want to lose her.

“I can promise you, Karson, she isn’t going anywhere. When you love someone, you accept all of them and their career. She knew what she was signing up for. She knew who she loved, and that’s a hockey player. It’s hard, it sucks, and I hated every single second of it, especially when your dad left all of us alone. But in the end, I knew that he was doing it to provide for us.”

“Yeah,” Karson agreed with a nod. “You’re right.”

“I usually am, despite what your father says,” she said and he laughed.

When his laughter subsided, he asked shyly, “Do you think we’ll be okay?”

She didn’t even hesitate. “Yes. I think that you guys are going to be great. She loves you, honey, and boy, do you love her. The sparks fly when you two are together. We were all blinded by it. Stop questioning it; just love her. You can’t go wrong if you do that.”

He could do that. It was easy to love Lacey; it came naturally, but there was always Nate Martin trying to ruin them. “That’s not a problem, but what is a problem is her dad.”

“What does her dad have to do with any of this?”

“He apparently calls every day, and while I am glad he does because she does love him, I feel like he is setting seeds in her to take her away again.”

His mom scoffed and then said, “Jesus, Karson, what is wrong with you? I’ve never heard you so insecure and paranoid.”

He smirked, feeling a little silly as he said, “I don’t want to lose her.”

“You won’t as long as you love her and do right by her. Stop worrying about all the outside shit. It’s about you two. That’s it. As long as you love her and she loves you, nothing else can touch that. You have to believe that.”

“But I loved her and she loved me nine years ago, and look what happened. I spent nine years without her.”

She paused. “Okay, maybe you’re right, but you two are adults now. Surely she can see through the bullshit. You both just have to believe in each other.”

“I believe in us, Ma. I’m just worried she doesn’t. I’m scared she misses home and wants to go back.”

“Have you told her this?” she asked, and he could tell she was getting frustrated with him. Hell, he was frustrated with himself.

“No, she’s already upset I left. I don’t want to put all that on her too,” he said, running his hand through his hair again.

“Communication is the key, Karson. How are you both supposed to feel good about your relationship if you don’t talk about the things that bother you?”

There was a lot they needed to talk about, but neither of them was doing it. Before he could answer her, she asked, “Have you two had a fight yet?”

He thought for a moment. They’d had little tiffs but not a full-blown fight. He hadn’t wanted to upset her. “No, I hope we don’t either.”

“Why? You need to. Fighting is good. It means that there is something to fight for. Don’t walk on eggshells around this woman because you are scared to lose her. Don’t be a doormat, Karson. That is just insane.”

“No, I won’t. I just don’t want to upset her because I’m insecure.”

“I get that, but you guys have been living in this honeymoon phase, and now that you two are apart, you are unsure of your relationship. That’s not good, Karson. You need to feel good about you guys twenty-four-seven,” she said and he nodded. Like always, she was right.

“Is he acting like a pussy again?” he heard his father ask.

“For fuck’s sake,” Karson muttered as his mother laughed.

“Leave him be! This is why he doesn’t talk to you. You’re an asshole. Jeez!”

“Man, I love you too,” his father barked at her.

“Love you more, sweetheart!” she called and Karson laughed.

“Thanks, Ma,” Karson said with a grin.

“Anytime, my love. Now do me a favor and call Lacey. Talk to her.”

“You don’t think that’s something I should do in person?” he asked, when subconsciously he was trying to prolong the conversation with her. While his mom was completely right, he really didn’t want to upset Lacey. Which again was something that was bound to happen. Man, maybe he was a fucking pussy. It was all Lacey’s fault. She did this to him.

“Stop trying to drag this out. FaceTime her and fix all your uncertainties before you do something you’ll regret. Like retire or drive that girl away with your insecurities. Because, while you haven’t voiced them, one day you will, and it will be a clusterfuck of crazy and she’ll run the other way. Communication, Karson. Communication.”

“Okay, Ma,” he agreed. “I’ll call her once I’m done talking to you.”

“Good, and I promise you, it’s going to all be fine. You two are meant to be together.”

“I’m glad you think so because her family doesn’t agree.”

“’Cause they are jackasses.”

“Jackasses you’ll be breaking bread with at Thanksgiving.”

“Why on earth would we do that?”

“Lacey invited them.”

“I thought she was a smart girl,” she said and Karson smiled. “Oh well, the sooner, the better, I guess. It will be awkward, but they are family.”

He nodded. “Yeah, yay for in-laws.”

“Yay, indeed,” she said with a laugh. “But I did get a beautiful daughter-in-law out of it.”

Karson grinned as he slowly nodded. “Yeah, you did.”

“One you’re about to call.”

Shit.