King Sized Beds and Happy Trails (Beds Series) (2 page)

A dry lump forms in my throat
, and I brace myself for the impact that is Sandy Nelson. “What are you looking at bitch?”

The dry, lump in my throat turns into a boulder
, and I can’t get any words out.

“Get a life,” Ryan says for me.

“I have one thank you. It’s your friend here who doesn’t.” She puts her hand down on the table and leans toward me. “Don’t think I don’t know about your little crush. I see the way you look at Sean like a pathetic, lost puppy.” Her voice rises and the steady conversations around us begin to dwindle.  “Just accept it, Lexie. You’re a nobody and always will be.”

A whisper
comes from my left, a laugh from my right and beside me a hand shoots up, finger pointing in my direction. More whispers echo through the air until they hit me from every angle, flooding my ears till it’s all I hear.

Heat surges through my veins, shooting through my ears and cheeks. I look down at my pinky ring too afraid to look anyone in the face.

Call me a glutton for punishment or whatever the saying is, but I glance up and watch as Sandy struts away and tucks herself under Sean’s arm. Stupid tears sting my eyes. He turns around, blue irises catching mine. The cold spot on my heart warms when I see the apology on his face. The way he shrugs and offers up a sincere smile.

I might not be good enough for Sean right now, but I can be. And will be. He will love me. One more year before I leave this town behind. One more year before I’m not defined by things I can’t control.

One more year.

There are two things in life I can’t stand. The sound of Velcro, which just thinking about it sets my teeth on edge and makes the hairs on my arm shoot up. And the second thing…

S
eeing Lex cry.

I can only see half her face, but it’s enough. I’ve known her too long not to ignore the flush filling her chest and going up her neck, the way she’s holding her breath, and that damn ring
.

Twist.

Twist.

Twist.

If she tries to turn it anymore, her pinky will come off. I doubt she’d even notice. Nate and Kaylee look at me with those faces that say, “Uh, comfort her, you moron!”

Just as I reach out to tug her into my side, she leaps from her chair and bolts out the door, leaving her disgusting burger and her three best friends behind.

“Ah hell.”

She
always
goes outside when she gets hurt or embarrassed or anything like that so she can breathe. And she left my hoodie here, so she’s probably freezing her ass off.

“Well, go after her.” Kaylee kicks my shin. “You always know how to make her feel better.”

I snort. “When she listens.” But I whip my hoodie over my shoulder and get up anyway, because we all know I’ll go after Lex.

The door makes that clinging sound as I exit, and i
t doesn’t take long to find exactly where she ran off to. She’s sitting in the backseat of my grandparents’ Lincoln, clutching her stomach. Her arms are painted in goose bumps as she shivers a storm because she rolled the windows down. To breathe, I’m assuming. I shake my head.

Why does she do this to herself? Why does any girl? They go after the dickwads who lead
them on, while they’re really thinking about another chick.

And I'm here to pic
k up the pieces. I don't mind, because it's Lexie. And I'll keep doing this to myself because I'm in love with the girl.

“Lex?” I say, climbing in next to her. I know she doesn't want to hear anything. Just needs to cry it out or whatever. I've got a dry shoulder. Still, I tell her anyway, 'cause that pansy isn't worth it. “Don’t cry.”

It doesn't matter what I tell her. Never does. She falls onto my white shirt and soaks it within seconds. I pull the hoodie over her shoulders and rub her back. She tightens her hold on me, sending sparks through my chest, which is a total d-bag thing right now since I can’t be turned on while she’s like this. I know what she’s thinking. And it’s not how good it feels to be hugging me, because we hug all the time. She’s twisting the ring on her pinky behind my back, which means no matter how long I hold her, she’s going to keep thinking she’s not good enough for anyone.

I try humor instead.

“I think Sandy has a cold or something.”

She tenses. “What?”

“Major boogers hanging out of her nose. Didn’t you notice?”

A big whoosh of air pops from her mouth as she laughs against me. “Now that you mention it, I think she’s always had a nasal problem.”

“Kind of sick, isn’t it? On top of that, I think she has B.O. issues. Smelt like socks and hot dogs from where I was sitting.”

She laughs again, releasing her hold on me and wiping her eyes. “I think that was your food, Ry.”

“Vegetarian, remember?” I pat my stomach and wink at her. She punches me in the shoulder, but it’s one of those halfhearted ‘I’m just doing this so you’ll think I’m okay, but I’m really not’ punches. Rubbing the back of my neck, I say, “Lex, I want you to do something for me.”

She cocks an eyebrow. “What?”

“Forget about him. He’s not worth it.”

She doesn’t answer
. Just looks down at her black nails and sighs. I wrap her in my arms again because it’s all I can think to do.

“But he… he’s perfect.”

Heat starts going up my neck. Perfect, my ass. That guy hits on anything with boobs. My voice comes out in a growl. “I know, you told me.”

“I-I’ve never felt like this with anyone before.
”

More heat. I’m surprised she can’t feel the flames coming off my face. “Lex…”

“Do you think, maybe it’s possible for me to prove I
am
good enough for him?”

What is she talking about? I pull her back to study her eyes. She’s serious. She wants to try to go after the
jackass, even after he completely spit-swapped with her mortal enemy?

“You don’t h
ave to prove anything.” I know I’m sort of yelling and that’s not what she needs right now, but how could she even be thinking of chasing after a guy who’s going to do this to her over and over? Play her then go for some other girl. “
He’s
not good enough for you.”

“Really, Ry?” She folds her arms and gives me the constipated mad look. “I’m the daughter of the town drunk and the reason my dad walked out—”

“Knock it off.” She knows I don’t like to hear about the mess with her parents. We’ve had an unspoken pact not to talk about how much crap we get at home. “Let’s just…talk about something else.”

She looks like she wants to yell for a second, but she shakes her head and lets it go. “You want to talk more about
Booger Sandy? Because that
was
helping.”

I chuckle. “Booger Sandy. You think we should give her a big box of tissues before she heads off for the senior ski trip? Or should we just watch it freeze to the top of her lip while she’s out there
?”

She doesn’t laugh. Damn, I thought that one was pretty good. But Lex’s eyes get real big
, and her smile stretches across her face. “That’s it! You’re a genius, Ryan.”

Huh? “Well, yeah…but what about this time?”

“I’m going on the senior trip with you guys.”

That perks me up. In more ways than one
to be honest. “Yeah? Sweet! It’ll help you take your mind off all this sh—”

“Sean’ll be there. It’s the perfect opportunity.” She’s talking to the window, throwing the hoodie over her head and cuddling into it.

“Wait, what are you talking about?”

“All I have to do is make him see me when I’m having a good time.” She flips her long brown hair out of the sweater. “Like, when I’m not dealing with my mom or living in my crummy basement apartment, or
bumming around school. He needs to see me without all that crap. Just as me. I’ll totally get him to see I’m right for him.” I’m frozen as she leans across the seats to kiss my cheek. “Thanks. You know you’re awesome, right?” Another hug around my middle. “I couldn’t have asked for a better friend, as cheesy as that sounds.”

Bullet to the gut on top of everything else.

Always the friend.

And now the reason why she’s going on the trip to do Operation Date Dickhead.

This trip will be one hell of a week.

For a girl who has nothing, I sure as hell have a lot of shit. I toss another pair of jeans out of my closet and move on to the next. Once I found a twenty dollar bill in my pants pocket. You would have thought I hit the jackpot the way I jumped up and down and screamed. Ryan
, who was waiting in the living room, flew in ready to perform his spider killing duties, but there was no spider. Only me and a twenty.

Now I could really use another
one. Several dozen actually. I need to go on that senior trip. Problem is, the only money I have is my ticket out of this dungeon. It’s my life savings. Every penny I have ever made has gone into the purple ceramic piggy bank hidden on the top shelf of my closet behind my old school notebooks, so Mom doesn’t find it.

Eleven hundred dollars is
a heck of a lot of money. But I’m willing to part with it if it gets me to the same ski resort as Sean.

“Alexis!” Mom’s voice shoots through the room like shards of glass.

I step out of the pile of clothes surrounding me and stick my head out the doorway. Our place isn’t big. All I have to do is look to the left to see the entire apartment. She’s standing outside her room with her French tipped nails on her tight, black, barely-there mini skirt. Other than the skirt the only thing she is wearing is a highlighter yellow bra.

“Yeah, M
om?” The fact she’s standing in her bra, I already know what she wants.

“Can I borrow your
red shirt with the scoop neck?”

“That shirt
’s tight on me.”

“Are you trying to say I’m fat?”
Her black-lined eyes narrow in on me and a chunk of blond falls away from the rest of her jet black bob.

No
…I’m trying to say it’s tight around my small B’s, so if you put it on, your D’s will surely have the seams hanging on for their lives.

Not that’d I’d say that
out loud. Mom always thinks I’m passing judgment on her when all I’m really doing is trying to keep her from being the poster child for white trash.

“No
t at all. You’re perfect. I’ll go get it.” In order to survive another year with her, I have no choice but to stroke her ego. And now with the trip in my future it’ll be even longer.

My entire closet is on my floor
, but luckily the red shirt is on top of the pile. I hold it out and admire it for one last time. It’ll never be the same. Every shirt she borrows comes back either stained, stretched out or with a cigarette burn. She doesn’t even smoke.

“Here.
” I step into the hallway and hold it out to her. She pulls it over head, and I swear I hear one of the seams break loose.

She looks down at her boobs, does this turny thing where they shift
, and with a satisfied grin she glances back at me. “You’re right. Perfection.”

If you were going for the
“I rent a room by the hour look” then yes…perfection. I sigh on the inside, but on the outside I smile.

“So what are you doing home?
” Air rushes out of her nose into a snort. “Still no boyfriend?” Her head tilts down, eye cocked waiting for me to admit I’m as pathetic as she thinks.

I’d never tell Mom about what happened with Sandy and how she stole Sean out from my red fingernail grip. Even if technically, I never had a grasp on him.
It’ll just be more bottles for Mom to stack in her bar of Lexie screw ups.

I walk
to the living room and pick up my
Cha Ching Cherry
nail polish. Maybe if I ignore her, she’ll just go away. I sit down and repaint my thumbnail.

“Let me guess
.” She taps her finger on her chin. “The boy you like doesn’t like you?”

Where’s Nate and his disappearing act
when you need him?

I don’t answer. I apply another coat to my thumb.

And another.

And another.

“That’s what I thought,” she says as she slides into her black stilettos. “Face it, Alexis. Guys are just a waste of your time.”

Waste of my time because no one will ever love me. I’m incapable of being loved. She’s said it all before
, and I don’t want to hear it again. I twist the cap back onto my nail polish and slam it down on the coffee table. An empty can of beer falls on its side and rolls to the edge. She started early today. Surprised I didn’t smell it.

“Hey! You trying to dent the table?”

“Like you’d even care if I did. Half the time you’re too drunk to notice and the other half…” I stop myself. My body freezes in shock. I never let my thoughts seep out of my mouth, and I just blew them out like a cannonball.

The glassy coat on M
om’s hazel eyes tell me it was a direct hit. Damn it.

I’m about to apologize when she holds her hand up. “You need to remember something. You’re the reason your father left. You’re the one who’s the fuck up here. Not me!”

How can I forget when I have her constantly reminding me? It’s not even worth it. I pick the beer can up off the table. If I don’t, it will never find its way to the garbage.

Without another word to my mother I grab her keys off the counter. “Hey
, where are you going with those?” she screams and trips as she runs after me.

It’s too late. I slam the door in her face and lock it. 

I put my earbuds in and let the Black Keys drown out the pounding and kicking at my door. Fuck up or not, I’d never let her drive drunk. You’d think she’d give me points for that.

The trip might clear out my lifesavings
, but if I can just have a week away from
her
, it’s worth it.

After twenty minutes I pull out one of the buds. The banging has stopped. I take out the other and ease my door open. Her purse is off the floor, yellow pages opened on the table
, which means she called a cab to get to work. At least now I won’t have to worry about her driving home drunk.

Not that she ever does. Someone usually takes pity on her and drops her off at the curb. On a few occasions I found her sleeping on the lawn
, but for the most part, she makes it inside.

I pick up a pair of jeans I already checked. Please
God, just give me a break. I reach into the front and back pockets again.

Nothing.

I throw them back into the pile and go back into my closet. My summer clothes are put away in a big Tupperware-looking box on the top shelf. My last resort. I reach up and grab it. At least God gave me height.

The box comes down awkwardly
, knocking me off balance and sending me into my winter sweaters. I let go of the box, and it hits the floor sideways, spilling clothes onto the floor as I grab for the sweaters engulfing me.

My
midsection arches, my body goes backwards, and I pull on the sweaters in my hands to propel me up. The cheap hangers I got at the dollar store bend at the weight and with a loud snap I go tumbling backwards. My head smacks the wall and a sweater falls on my face.

Perfect.
Just perfect.