Johnny (Connelly Cousins #2) (12 page)

“Where are you?”

“Northeastern Pennsylvania. Visiting a college friend.”

Dr. Hamilton expelled an audible breath. “I’m at a conference in Philadelphia this week. Do you think we could meet?”

Dr. Hamilton wanted to meet with her?  That couldn’t be good. It had to be bad. Very bad. No one thought twice about giving you good, or even nominally bad news over the phone. It was only the horrific, crush-the-last-of-your-hopes-and-dreams type of news doctors had to tell you in person.

When Stacey didn’t answer, Dr. Hamilton spoke again. “Please, Stacey. This is important.”

“Can you be more specific?”

“I think it would be best discussed in person, and as soon as possible,” the doctor replied obliquely.

Shit.
This was not good. Stacey took a deep breath to steel herself. She could do this. She could do anything. She would face this head on, chin up. If she’d learned anything from the past few years, it was that ignoring bad news didn’t make it go away. It was quite poetic, in a tragic sort of way. The world was all about balance. The best two days of her life had to be paid for somehow, right?

“All right,” she sighed. It was probably better than sulking around Lina’s cabin for the next few days. Chances were, she wasn’t going to get much more accomplished here anyway.

They arranged a time and place. King of Prussia, three p.m. the following afternoon. At least there was a huge mall there. Stacey could find distraction by spending exorbitant amounts of money on a whirlwind shopping trip.

After hanging up with Dr. Hamilton, Stacey was restless. Now that she’d committed to the meeting, it couldn’t come fast enough for her. There was no way she’d find sleep tonight. The most she could hope for was maybe losing herself in her current work in progress while she awaited the dawn, but that hadn’t worked well earlier.

What if Johnny came back?  Not that there was much hope of that; it was already past sunset. He’d been gone the entire day and should have cooled down by now. If he wasn’t here already, he probably wouldn’t be.

That was probably a good thing. No awkward goodbyes. No uncomfortable conversations about why she was leaving earlier than planned.

Somehow they had avoided talking about her “challenges”, though she had a sneaking suspicion he had obtained the cliff notes version from Lina, especially after he had come to her during yesterday’s storms. He didn’t have to know the gory details or the stark truth – that there was only a ten percent chance she’d ever regain the full use of her legs. Or that as a result of the accident, the likelihood of her suffering a fatal aneurism was shockingly high.

God knew what else she was about to find out.

Yeah, it was definitely better this way. To leave with the memories of two spectacular nights, before these damned inconvenient feelings took a greater hold and made it harder to walk away.

She chuckled bitterly at the irony. She couldn’t walk. And rolling away was just so much less tragically romantic.

Before she could change her mind, she dialed Lina’s number. It rang several times before the voicemail picked up. “Lina, this is Stacey. I, um, well I was going to ask you to ... oh, nevermind.”

She huffed into the phone, frustrated. Why wouldn’t the words come when she needed them? She’d been on the
New York Times
Bestseller list four times, for God’s sake!  

She took a deep breath to steady herself. “Something came up, and I have to leave. I’m sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye in person, but don’t worry, okay?” She paused for a moment, trying to think of a way to minimize the damage. No matter what she said, Lina was going to feel hurt by her abrupt departure.

“I love you, Lina. Try not to be too mad at me. You’re the best friend a girl could ever ask for, and these last couple of days... well, they’ve been some of the best. No regrets.” She added that last part just in case Johnny was around to hear it. He didn’t have to know everything, but Stacey did want him to know that, at least.

Stacey disconnected before she said anything else.
Everything happens for a reason
, she reminded herself. Lina wasn’t home because she wasn’t supposed to be there. If she had been, and Stacey had asked for a ride, it would have led to questions, maybe some crying.

Definitely crying.

It was better this way. Let Lina think what she wanted. Stacey had ignored her calls and letters for a very long time, after all. Lina wouldn’t be that surprised. Hurt maybe, but after all was said and done, Stacey would write her a long letter of explanation and hope she understood.

Using the browser on her phone (thank God for modern technology!), Stacey found a local limo service. At least she didn’t need to worry about money, she thought wryly, packing her few belongings as she waited for the driver. She hoped he had a good GPS, or he’d never find her up here. It was costing her plenty to get somebody to drive up into the mountains this time of night, but that was one benefit to being a wealthy recluse – the money was always there when you needed it.

Even when nothing else was.

* * *

W
hen Johnny finally made it back to the cabin, it was late. His conversation with Lina continued to run through his mind. The more he thought about it, the more he thought she might be right. No woman could be that responsive if she hadn’t felt it, too, right?

Besides, he had to make sure Stacey was okay. There was a gnawing, uncomfortable feeling in his gut that told him something was wrong.

And it wasn’t just his own regret.

His heart sank when he reached the cabin and saw nothing but darkness. There was no sign of light or life anywhere. Hoping against hope that she was sleeping safe and sound, he entered noiselessly, flipping on as few lights as possible. He strode directly to his bedroom first. He didn’t need to turn on the light to know that she wasn’t there. He would have felt her presence, but there was nothing. Only the faintest residual scent of cherries that told him she hadn’t been gone
that
long.

A quick search of the rest of the first floor revealed that her laptop was gone, as was her suitcase and assorted travel bags. Then it hit him. Hard, like another sucker punch to the gut.
Stacey was gone
.

And by the looks of things, she was not coming back. 

Damn it
.

Johnny sank down into the sofa, his eyes going to the makeshift ramp, and the pieces started falling into place. After Lina had dropped her little bombshell “test” theory, she’d gone on to explain how Stacey had built walls around herself after the accident. That she’d cut herself off from everyone and everything, including Lina, until just recently.

Lina had seen her visit as a sign that
maybe
some of those walls were starting to crack.

Like a bolt of lightning, realization dawned. He had done more than just put a little crack in the wall. He’d taken a sledgehammer to it, and it was teetering on the brink of total collapse. That was why she’d said what she did. Because she wanted to know which side he’d be on when the wall came crashing down.

Only instead of saying the words she needed to hear, he’d walked away. Stormed out with cruel parting words. He’d seen the look in her eyes when she’d asked him if he was leaving. Half of her was shouting “I told you so”, while the other half was gaping in stunned disbelief. She wanted to believe in him, but was afraid to.

Jesus.
How many people had given up on her
?
 

Unable to sit still, Johnny got up and paced over to where she’d sat writing until the storms had her running for cover. Right in front of the window, looking out over the lake below. It was a spectacular view.

It was also where she’d sat earlier that morning, watching him leave. Yeah, he’d seen her against the window in his rearview mirror as he was pulling away. Her hand had been splayed against the glass, her facial expression... lost. That image would haunt him for the rest of his days.

Rage built up inside of him and he struck out at the solid oak support beam. Blood pooled around his knuckles – surely he’d dislocated a few – but it did little to curb his anger at himself. He whirled around, ready to take another shot when something caught his eye. Bending down, he picked it up and turned it in his hand. Stacey’s flash drive. It must have fallen out when she packed up. He absently tucked it into his pocket.

The sounds of Mötley Crüe’s “Kickstart My Heart” rang out from his mobile, even as Lina’s number popped up on the display. “Yeah?” he said, more gruffly than he’d intended.

“Johnny?  It’s Lina. Listen, I know it’s late, but I just got in and there’s this message on my voicemail from Stace...” Johnny gripped the phone so tightly he was afraid it would crumple in his hand. “Johnny, I’m worried.”

“I’m on my way.” Johnny was out the door before he even had his phone back in his pocket.

S
tacey sprawled out on the king size bed in her luxury suite at the high-end chain hotel. It was located only a few minutes from King of Prussia, so she had plenty of time to kill before her meeting. Surprisingly, once the driver picked her up it had only taken about two and half hours to get here. He was a younger man, professional, but a bit put out at her request to drive her all the way to the southeastern corner of the state when the closest airport didn’t have a puddle-jumper available. A two-hundred dollar tip and a free room of his own for the night went a long way toward appeasing him, though.

It was a big room. Too big for just one person, really, but it gave her lots of space. She needed space. Otherwise things –
people
– got too close.

Stacey looked at her mobile phone vibrating on the bed. Again. Lina’s number on the caller id. It had to be about the tenth time she’d called. Knowing Lina, she’d probably keep calling all night if she didn’t answer.

Might as well get it over with. Wearily, Stacey picked it up. “Yes?”

“Stacey!  Oh God, Stace, are you okay?  We’ve been so worried...”
We?

“I’m fine, Lina. Please don’t worry.”

“Don’t worry?! 
Don’t worry?!
Are you kidding me?”

Despite herself, Stacey had to smile. That was vintage Lina. So open and honest with her emotions. Stacey could picture her pacing back and forth, running her hand through her hair until it stuck up like a jagged halo around her face.

“Is that her?  Give me the phone, Lina.” Stacey’s eyes misted over with unwanted tears at the sound of Johnny’s voice in the background. She missed him. How was that even possible?  She’d spent what, less than two days with him? Yet it was as if he was already entwined in her heart and soul.

Johnny was everything she’d ever wanted in a man; he was the real-life example of the heroes in her books. Was it a gift that she’d been given, getting to spend some time with him? Or was it a cruel reminder of everything she couldn’t have?

Stacey wrapped her arms around herself, remembering the way he had held her during the thunderstorms. Johnny wasn’t just a sexy distraction, he was kind and compassionate, too. He had known exactly what she needed. He had given her something strong to hold on to while the storm ravaged her damaged psyche.

Part of her wished desperately he was here with her now. Wished that he could be with her tomorrow when Dr. Hamilton said whatever she had to say. She could probably handle anything Dr. Hamilton told her if he was by her side.

Then she had to remind herself once again that it wasn’t fair to him. And she had to think about what was good for him. That’s what you did for people you loved, right?  You put their needs ahead of your own.

Oh, Jesus
. The truth of it hit her hard. She was in love with Johnny.

It was just like Lina had described, though she hadn’t been willing to accept it. Johnny Connelly had rumbled into her life with all the subtlety of that big, powerful Harley he drove and laid waste to everything else in the process.

“I’ve got to go, Lina. Thank you, for everything. It was wonderful seeing you again.”

“Stacey!  Stacey, wait!  Tell me where you are and I’ll come get you...” Johnny spoke into the phone, his voice strained. “Please, baby, I’m so sorry, just tell me where you are.”

Stacey covered her mouth with her hand, but she wasn’t able to completely muffle the choking sob that erupted from her. He must have heard it. “Christ, Stacey, just - ”

Stacey turned off the phone, then stuffed it in the bottom of her bag.

* * *

J
ohnny let out a string of curses that would have made a sailor blush.

“What happened?!?” Lina demanded.

“She fucking hung up on me,” Johnny said through clenched teeth, pacing back and forth, fighting the urge to slam his bruised fist into something hard again.

Kyle looked at him with something close to sympathy; Lina crossed her arms and tapped her foot, suddenly seeming much larger than her small frame would suggest. Her green eyes – the same clear-cut emerald shade as Johnny’s – flashed. Johnny sunk down into a chair, covering his face with his hands.

“You have to help me find her.”

“I’ll do that with or without you,” Lina snapped, then immediately said, “I’m sorry, Johnny. I just can’t lose her again, you know?”

Yeah, he had a pretty good idea. It didn’t have to make sense to be real. It didn’t have to make sense for him to want to make it right. But how? Stacey had changed her plans, packed up and left. Clearly not even the allure of the cabin was enough to counteract his stupidity, and she wouldn’t tell him where she was. She’d turned off her goddamned phone, too, since the last three redials had gone straight to vmail. He clenched his fist, re-opening the splits across his knuckles.

Thankfully, Lina had a more practical approach to the problem.

“So...” Lina got up and started walking around her living room. “Someone had to drive her away from the cabin, right?  We’re the only ones she knows in the area, and none of us did it, so that leaves what? A limo service, right?”

Johnny looked up, admiration in his eyes. Sometimes he forgot how smart his little sister was. “Right. And it’s not like there’s a lot of them around here, is it?”