Johnny (Connelly Cousins #2) (15 page)

She wanted to be able to step into the street and hail a regular cab on her own. To get a room above the first floor in a hotel so she could look over a balcony fifty stories up and see the lights of the city below. To not have to scout out ramps and special bathrooms with doors big enough to get her chair through, just so she could enjoy what everyone else took for granted.

Her mind was made up. She might have fallen fast and hard for Johnny, but she no longer cared very much for herself. Somewhere along the line she’d given up, retreated into her shell like a coward. Shunned everyone and everything because it was too hard not to. She was being given a chance here. The old Stacey wouldn’t have thought twice about it. The old Stacey had a creed that exemplified every aspect of her life in four simple words: “all in, balls out”.

“Yes.” The word came out strong and clear. Dr. Hamilton paused, her fork halfway between her plate and her mouth.

“Excuse me?”

“Yes, I’ll do it.” It came out even stronger the second time.

“Don’t you want time to think this over?  At least sleep on it?  Maybe I didn’t explain fully the risks involved, Stacey, that must be considered before you - ”

Stacey cut her off, putting up her hand in a ‘stop’ motion. “Dr. Hamilton, I’ve had five years to think this over. Life is not without risks. I want to do this. I’m sure. No doubts. Final answer. How soon can we start?”

The doctor’s face lit up in guarded excitement. “Can you be down at McKinnon first thing tomorrow morning?”

“Why wait?” Stacey asked, dreading the thought of spending another sleepless night in the hotel room alone. It would give her too much time to overthink it.

“If you don’t mind, I’ll head back with you tonight and get settled. I’ll have my things sent down, and that will save time tomorrow. Hell, the leeches can even have a go at me tonight, if they’re up for it.”

Elena Hamilton smiled, and for the first time in a long time, Stacey felt like herself again. “Sounds like a plan.”

* * *

B
y early afternoon, Johnny was ready to lose his mind. He hated waiting around. He needed to be doing something. He’d taken a shower. Shaved. Dressed. Tried watching TV for all of about five seconds, then paced around incessantly for the next several hours. He tossed on his jacket, intending to take yet another lap around the parking lot, when his hands found the thumb drive he’d picked up in the cabin.

“Lina, mind if I use your laptop?” Lina looked up over the screen at him, then rubbed her eyes.

“Not at all. I need a break anyway.” Johnny picked up the computer and carried it over into the corner, where he inserted the flash drive and opened up the file with the latest change date. He began to read what Stacey had written, and found himself pulled in after the first few sentences. Page after page melted away as he was transported into the world of the woman who had shown him what love could be like. By the time he finished, he was blown away. In her own way, Stacey managed to capture everything he was feeling inside and put it into words. He saw her in the heroine, recognized himself in the hero. It wasn’t finished, but there was no doubt of a happy ending.

Johnny had to get out of there. He had to find Stacey. “I’m going down to the front desk.”

“Again?”

Johnny shot Lina an irritated look. “Yes.
Again
. And I’m going to keep going down there until I get some answers. Oh, and just so you know, I’ll be hanging in the lobby for a while, keeping an eye out for that van. The room’s yours.”

He needed time to think, and that was better off done alone. He felt like a third wheel around them. He loved his sister dearly, and Kyle was one of his best friends, but they sure as hell didn’t need him moping around when they could be making proper use of the suite.

Promising to call if he learned anything, Johnny bypassed the elevator and went straight for the stairwell. Anything to burn off some of this energy was a good thing. Crossing the lobby floor, he ignored the appreciative glances he received from some of the women there. He wasn’t interested.

The guy at the registration desk was no more helpful than he had been earlier. No, Ms. Shaughnessy had not returned. No, the attendant could not give out her room number. No, he really couldn’t say how long she planned on staying with them. Johnny walked outside, barely tethering the urge to wrap his big hands around the snotty pissant’s scrawny neck and shake some better answers out of him. Maybe some fresh air would help.

God only knew how many times he lapped the parking lot before he saw the familiar white van pulling into the IHOP. Johnny was beside it before the driver came to a complete stop, waiting expectantly for the door to open.

“Can I help you, son?” The older man walked around the front of the van, watching him carefully. He made no move to slide open the handicapped-accessible passenger door.

“I’m waiting for someone,” Johnny answered, shifting his weight impatiently. Sam’s eyes narrowed, probably recognizing him as the young man he’d seen tearing across the parking lot at full speed earlier that morning.  

“Sorry to disappoint you, son, but there’s no one in there. You sure you got the right van?”

“Yes, sir, I’m sure.” The image of the van’s logo was burned into his brain, as was the white-haired man speaking with him now. Johnny made no move to step away.

Sam opened the door, showing Johnny the empty interior.

“Can you tell me where she is?” Johnny asked, running his hand through his hair. It was a plea, not a demand.

“I was just about to grab something to eat. How about you join me?  We could have a nice little chat.”

What the hell was this guy talking about? He didn’t have time for that kind of shit. His gut was screaming with the need to find Stacey. “Look, I just want to know - ”

“I know what you want, son. I can see it in your eyes, plain as day. And if you want any information from me, you will join me for a cup of coffee.
Capisce
?”

Yeah, he understood. It wasn’t like he had much choice. This guy wasn’t going to provide the information he needed otherwise. “Yeah, I got you.”

“Good choice.”

Johnny followed him across the lot to the IHOP. They sat in the same booth Johnny had been in that morning, the one with a clear view of the front entrance.

“Stacey is a fine young woman,” Sam said slowly, sipping his hot coffee while he waited for his soup and sandwich. Johnny turned his eyes to the older man’s, impatient for him to get to the point.

“Bright, funny, and beautiful, to boot. She’d make a fine wife. For the right man, that is.”

Johnny clenched his jaw. Yeah, he’d already figured all that out for himself.

“You gonna tell me where she is?”

“I showed her the sights,” Sam said slowly, taking another sip. “Should have seen her face, son. Excited as a little kid when we hit the zoo.”

Johnny could picture it clearly. Her pretty gray eyes lit up, her mouth would curl up into a genuine smile. It made his chest ache. “So where is she now?”

Sam took a deep breath. “She asked me to take her to a restaurant in King of Prussia, near the big mall. Said she was meeting someone there.”

Johnny clenched his jaw. Thoughts of her having dinner with another man shot hot bolts of jealousy through his veins. Sam caught the look and smiled.

“Before you ask, it was a woman,” Sam said knowingly. “I hung around in the parking lot, just in case she changed her mind and wanted a ride back.”

Johnny felt a surge of newfound respect for the older man. Anybody who looked out for Stacey was all right in his book. He had to admit, too, that he felt much better, knowing she’d met another woman. Maybe it was her agent.

“I don’t know who she was, but she had a real professional look about her. Stacey left the restaurant with her about an hour and a half after I dropped her off.”

“Why are you telling me all this?”

“Because I know a man in love when I see one, son. Just as I know a woman with a broken heart.”

They talked for a while longer, Johnny ever-vigilant for her return. When they parted company, Sam took his number, promising to call if he heard from Stacey again, and wishing Johnny luck.

A different desk clerk was on duty when Johnny re-entered the lobby. Familiar looking luggage was being wheeled across the floor by a skinny bellhop to a waiting hotel courtesy van.

“Hey,” Johnny called, catching up to the kid. “What are you doing with that luggage?”

The boy eyed Johnny suspiciously, his eyes shifting for the best direction to run should the need arise. Johnny whipped out a twenty and held it out to the kid, who pocketed it with one more quick glance around.

“All I know is, the lady’s not coming back and wanted her luggage sent on.”

“Sent on where?”

The kid shrugged. “I just carry the bags, dude.”

Johnny posed the same question to the van driver. It took a fifty in his palm to get the guy to look up his itinerary. “McKinnon Research and Medical Center.”

Blood turned to ice in his veins.
Oh, Stacey. What have you done?

“A
re you sure there’s no one I can call for you?” Elena asked as Stacey tried to relax in the sterile hospital room. They’d tried to make it less antiseptic with splashes of color here and there, some semi-comfortable looking chairs, flat screens, but there was no hiding what it was.

Stacey shook her head. There was no one. Her mother would have a bloody fit if she knew what she was doing. She’d never understood why Stacey refused to simply accept what had happened and move on.

Lina would be here in a second, and would be supportive, but as much as Stacey needed a friend, she couldn’t put Lina in that situation again.

Johnny, well, things were too new with him. Stacey had been doing a lot of thinking. If Lina was right, and there really was such a thing as a
croie
, then Johnny might just be hers. They hadn’t spent much time together, but was that a prerequisite? Was there some magical, socially acceptable number of hours, days, and weeks that legitimized such a thing? 

There had been an instant, undeniable connection between them. In fewer than forty-eight hours, she’d grown closer to him, emotionally and physically, than she had any other man. That deserved some kind of follow-up, but not this. Before Stacey could even consider pursuing any kind of relationship, she had to get herself together first.

This was the first step. Either it would work or it wouldn’t, but either way, she had to try.

“If... if things don’t go all that well, though...”
Translation:  If I die or become a vegetable
“... would you call this number for me and just... let her know? “ Stacey handed Dr. Hamilton a post-it note with Lina’s name and number on it, as well as a sealed, stamped envelope addressed to Lina McCullough.

“Of course.” Elena tucked the items into Stacey’s chart, making a notation along the side.

It wasn’t long before the lab techs came, taking more samples than Stacey could believe were actually necessary. A few of Dr. Hamilton’s colleagues came by to meet her as well, excited at the prospect of putting their theories to practical application. Stacey forced a smile, conjured as much confidence as she was able, and remained polite and pleasant.

The truth was, she was scared to death.

* * *

J
ohnny didn’t bother calling the room first; he went right up to the fifth floor and pounded on the door. Lina opened it only a moment later, looking freshly tousled.

“Why would Stacey go to McKinnon Research and Medical Center?” Johnny demanded.

“What makes you think she went there?” Lina asked, evading his question. The fact that she did so was not lost on him.

“Her luggage is being delivered there right now, and her room here’s been cancelled.”

Kyle walked out of the bathroom, shirtless, hair barely towel-dried and sticking out at impossible angles. “Is there a problem, Johnny?”

Johnny spared him a glance, then pinned his eyes back on Lina. “I want to know why Stacey would go to MRMC. And I think Lina has some idea.”

Lina looked guiltily away. “I don’t know why she went to McKinnon.”

“Lina...” Johnny warned. She was holding something back. It was written all over her face.

“Baby, if you know something, you should tell him.” Kyle’s voice was soft, encouraging, and once again, Johnny felt a surge of appreciation for his brother-in-law.

Lina sank down onto the sofa, putting her head in her hands. “I really don’t know why she’s at McKinnon,” she said with a sigh, “but I do know Stacey’s been doing a lot of research into experimental neurosurgeries.”

“She
what
?!”

Lina stood up quickly, hugging her arms to her chest. “Don’t yell at me, Johnny. It’s not helping.” She paced back and forth a few times while Johnny forced himself to remain calm.

“Please, Lina. I need to know.”

“I know.” She took a deep breath. “Stacey told me that if there was a chance she could get the full use of her legs again she would take it in a second. She had tons of info on her laptop about these promising new procedures, but most of them were only available in foreign countries. They haven’t been approved in the U.S. yet. As much as she wanted to try some of them, she was worried about the safety of having something done out of the country. She was waiting for something to become available here.”

“But why?” Johnny asked. “She’s perfect, just the way she is.”

Lina’s eyes softened. “You love her, don’t you?” He nodded, sinking down into a chair. Yeah, he did. He hadn’t known for sure until a few minutes ago, but he sure as hell did now.

“You have to understand what it’s like for her, Johnny. You didn’t know her before, like I did.”

“Then tell me. Make me understand. Because I cannot fathom how such a phenomenally successful, beautiful, intelligent, independent woman can be that unhappy with herself.”
With me.

Lina sat on the edge of the chair, wrapping one arm around his shoulders and taking his hand in hers. “Stacey was like...  well, let’s put it this way:  if we were all stars, Stacey was a meteor. She burned more brightly than anyone I’ve ever met. She was strong and kind and fearless. She was the first one on the dance floor, the last one to leave. There was nothing she wouldn’t try at least once. She loved life. Loved
living
life. People were drawn to her, because when they were with her, they got to live life too. She was like this wonderful summer breeze that just pulled everyone along with her.”