Irreversible Damage (Irreparable) (18 page)

Chapter 20

Tori

My first month in Minnesota flies by without a word from Brady, even after I sent him annulment papers. I know he got them. My attorney advised me that he signed them. He really has moved on with Annabelle and Andrew. The vows we exchanged should have held us together forever, until death do us part and all of that. But as with most words, they’re meaningless unless you’re willing to live by them. Betrayal is far from bad times, sickness, or any of the other things we promised to stand by each other and get through. I will never forgive him. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about my conversation with Annabelle and what I saw take place between her and Brady. She knew what she was doing the second she got in contact with him. I’m not sure if I hate myself or Brady more for letting her succeed. 

My parent’s house is in Chanhassen, a nice, peaceful suburb of Minnesota, but it’s lonely. Their house is on a large plot of land, a country home so different from the cookie-cutter stucco styles of Southern California, desolate. The first few days here, the quiet nearly broke me.

My worried mother insisted on taking me to a doctor. I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. While the antidepressants the doctor prescribed help tremendously with my erratic and emotional behavior, they’ve done nothing to help heal my broken heart. I suppose there is only one cure for that, and he doesn’t want me.

He has a family.

He’s happier without me. 

I registered for classes and got a job at Starbucks. Both of which, I start Monday. My parents have been supportive. I was worried they’d hover, but my dad is busy working, and Mom has more volunteer obligations than she has time for. I’m actually mildly disappointed.  I spend most days alone in my room, thinking or sulking or both. 

It’s not good. That’s not what I came to Minnesota to do.

Today I plan to get out of the house and start my new life. I get ready and head to the kitchen for breakfast. It’s deserted. I sit at the small computer desk and open my mom’s laptop. I log into my email. I have several unopened emails from Liv, the most recent of which came in last night. I frown, clicking on it. I’ve been a lousy friend.

Okay, you totally suck! I miss you. We all do. Please let me know how you are doing and when I can come visit. In case you’re wondering, Second Chances got signed. You can Google it.

I love you! Xo Liv

I close my email with a sigh. I’m truly happy for Brady and the rest of the guys. They deserve it. I open a Google page and type in Second Chances. There is an article about the band and the label, explaining that they’ll be in the studio for a few months before releasing the album. After that, they’ll head out on tour. I click on the “images” tab, and that’s when my stomach sinks.

Among the pictures of the band are photos of Brady with Annabelle tucked neatly to his side. So much for him fighting for me forever and my heart belonging to him. Actually, my heart does still belong to him, but he obviously doesn’t want it. Annabelle didn’t even wait until I boarded the plane to make her move, and Brady was more than willing.  I don’t know what I thought. She gave him a child. I know him well enough to know that’s the reason he’s with her. Out of obligation. It’s an admirable trait, yet equally infuriating.

As I click back to the search page, I spot a link to a video. I click on it. The video takes a few seconds to load. Brady’s in a stool with his guitar in his lap. Chad, Gabe, and Jesse blur into the background. When the sound kicks in, I recognize the music immediately. They’re covering Rihanna’s “Stay.” Brady plays the piano parts on the guitar. The low vibrato of his voice comes out delicate and raspy, as if he’s in pain. It’s just as slow as the original, but even more haunting coming from Brady. He’s changed the words so the entire song is from a guy’s POV. I’m confused. Was this for me? I was going to stay, until I found him banging Annabelle in our spare bedroom. No, it’s not for me. It’s for her. He must want her to stay. Judging from the photos, she said yes.  

I slam the laptop closed, agreeing to slam the door on that part of my life as well. I’m strong. I have my entire life ahead of me.

After grabbing a quick bite to eat and sucking down a cup of coffee, I head out to my Jeep and remove the top. It’s a beautiful fall day, and I’m determined to enjoy it.

The drive to Lake Minnetonka takes about a half hour. I marvel at the fall foliage as I maneuver the winding road toward the lake. Brilliant hues of amber and crimson, weaving through the greens and yellows, are stunningly beautiful. I hit a few small shops before deciding to eat lunch at Maynard’s. After telling the hostess to seat me outside, I follow her into the sunshine and down the steps to a small table on the second tier of the back deck.  It’s times like this when I miss my friends the most. If I were back in Mexico, Liv or Tug would be sitting across from me, making me laugh. The thought makes me feel guilty. I haven’t been in touch with either of them since I got here.

I can’t.

Not yet.

Although I was hesitant to order the fried walleye sandwich and fries, my dad insisted it’s the best think on the menu. As I bite into the sandwich, a small smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. It’s phenomenally good. I should know better than to ever question my dad when it comes to food. I eat, admiring the canvas in front of me, all the while contemplating what’s next in my life. Before long, I can’t take the solitude any longer and decide it’s time to head home.

After I pay the bill, I stop at the restroom. On my way out, I run into someone’s chest. His familiar scent makes me smile. I look up at a surprised Tug. What is he doing here? My gaze travels to the unfamiliar man standing at his left.  As I take in the tall, thin man in a suit, I let out a breath of relief. Tug’s here for business. He’s not here to see me.

“Brian, go ahead to the table,” he tells the guy. “I’ll be there shortly.”

He turns his large brown eyes on me and offers a friendly smile before reaching out to hug me. I hug him back, absorbing the comfort of his embrace. God, I’ve missed him.

I’ve missed all of them.

I pull away, nervously smoothing my hands down my skirt. “What are you doing here?”

I shift on my feet and straighten my hair.

His broad smile fills me with happiness. “We just opened an office here. I’m in town for a few weeks making sure everything gets off the ground.” He pauses, running his eyes over me. “It’s good to see you.”

I smile, gently punching him in the arm. “It’s good to see you, too, Tug.”

He smiles back. It’s a concerned smile, though, one I hate to see. “How are you?”

I shrug. “Good.”

“Hmm…I know that pout. You’re far from good.” He tips my chin up to look at him. “Listen, I’m late for this lunch meeting already. Are you free for dinner?”

I consider telling him “I’d rather eats slugs than go out with you,” but I hold it back. That was the old Tori. “I don’t know, Tug…I…” I have no idea what I’m trying to say.  I’d love nothing more that to spend some time with him. I want to hear him laugh. I love Tug’s laugh.

“It’s just dinner.” He taps my nose once. “I’d love to catch up. I’ve missed you.”

My heart soars with happiness. “I’ve missed you, too.”

“Good, then it’s settled.” He winks at me. “I’ll pick you up at six.” He turns and walks away.

“Wait!” I yell out to him. He turns around to face me. “You don’t know where I live.”

“Six,” he repeats with a smile. He turns back and disappears into the restaurant.

Brady

I’ve had Andrew for three days without a word from Annabelle. She finally texted me that she would be here to pick him up this evening. At midnight she had the audacity to show up drunk and want to take him home. After informing her that he was asleep, I offered to let her sleep here so she wouldn’t drive drunk.

I sort through Andrew’s laundry, folding tiny shorts and T-shirts as I ponder my earlier conversation with Liv. She suggested I rectify my and Annabelle’s current custody situation with a court-ordered visitation setup.  I’ve thought about it, but have avoided bringing it up to Annabelle. I don’t want to fight with her, but I’m starting to understand Andrew needs some kind of routine and structure in his life.

“You got a minute?” Annabelle walks into my room without knocking. She saunters toward me, staggering a little. She wears a look I’ve seen way too often lately, a look of seduction. It’s desperate. I almost feel sorry for her. I’ve tried everything to convince her we’re never going to be together. Tonight I need to spell it out clearly for her. My gaze travels from her cake-faced makeup to her hooker skirt. I’m sure she thinks it’s sexy. It’s trashy.

I put my hand up before she reaches me. “Don’t!”

She stops in her tracks, trying hard to look hurt, but I know it’s fake. “She’s never coming back.”

My eyes narrow at her. “Don’t talk about her,” I snap, turning away from her.

She pulls on my arm until I spin to face her. “She’s not, and Andrew deserves two parents.”

My body tenses as my nerve endings spark. “Don’t you fucking dare use him to try to fuck me, Annabelle. This is not a game. He’s not a pawn.”

Her lips press flat as her eyes shift to the floor. “I only want what’s best for him.”

“I do, too, and I don’t think our fucking has anything to do with that.”

She’s unaffected by my harsh words. “Can’t you at least try?” Her hand brushes across my chest.  “We could be really good together, Brady.”

“It’s not going to happen, Annabelle.” I remove her hand from my chest, and take a step back. “I love my son. You and I are friends, but the more you push me, the less I even want that.”

“Oh, come on.” She moves closer, grabbing for my hand.

I jerk it away and scowl at her, then decide to drop the bombshell I’ve been avoiding. “We need to discuss a custody arrangement for Andrew.”

She recoils, looking shocked. “What we have works for me.”

I shake my head. “It’s not good for him.”

“It’s fine!”

“It’s not fine.” Her eyes widen as my voice rises until I’m shouting. “It’s confusing for him to be tossed about between us on whatever day of the week you feel like.”

“Whatever.” Her eyes roll as she smiles indignantly. “You’re just turning this around on me to avoiding talking about Tori.”

“No, what I’m doing is discussing our son. The only thing I’m obligated to talk to you about. My personal life is none of your goddamn business.” Now I’m really pissed, my anger soaring to new heights. I step close to her, hoping she feels the anger oozing out of me, takes a hint. Her body goes rigid. “Your showing up here tonight drunk only solidifies my doubts about how we’re parenting him. Did you really think it was okay to pack him up and drive home in your condition?” I’m only getting started. “And where the hell have you been for three days?” My surging anger can’t be held back. I’m screaming at her. “What the fuck kind of mother leaves her kids for three days without even so much as a phone call?”

“I’m sorry!” she shouts back, tears springing free from her eyes. Finally, some genuine emotion from this woman. “I’m sorry, okay. I never wanted a kid.”

I let out a disgusted breath of air. That’s her excuse. “So that makes it right?”

“No.” Her gaze turns away from me. At least she feels shame.  “He was with you. I knew he was safe.”

I throw up my hands, irritated beyond belief. “That’s not the point, though, Ann.”

“I know. I’m sorry, Brady. I don’t know what I’m doing. The kid didn’t come with a manual. Sometimes I just feel trapped.”

My eyes flick up to her face. Her remorseful expression tamps my anger a little. “I understand.” I want to continue to rip her and tell her to wake up and face her responsibilities, but I can see she’s defeated. I don’t know where she’s been for the last three days, but it’s obviously drained her. She looks like she’s ready to drop. “Come here.”

She walks into my arms. I hug her, for now. Tomorrow, when she’s sober and rested, we’ll discuss this again. Andrew’s security is not optional.

“Thanks.” Her voice is weak. She lets go of me and sits on the bed.

I sit next to her and pat her knee. “What do you want to do with your life?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugs. “I’ve thought about going to nursing school.”

“So do it.” She looks at me like I’m an idiot. I realize she probably doesn’t have the money for nursing school. “I’ll pay for it.”

Her head snaps to look at me. “You will?”

“Absolutely,” I answer instantly. “You’re the mother of my child. If you agree to buckle down and quit partying, I’ll help you, even get you an apartment.” Wanting the best for Andrew means providing for his mother. I know that, and I’m willing to help her in any way I can. I know she wants more, but it will never happen. This is as much as I can offer.

Her gaze drops to her lap, watching her fingers twine nervously together. “I don’t know what to say.”

I pull her arm, lifting her from the bed. “Let’s get you to bed. We can talk tomorrow.” I walk her down the hall to the extra room. She sits on the bed, peering up at me, her makeup running down her cheeks. “I love him.”

“I know you do.” I reach down and remove her shoes before tucking her into bed.

Chapter 21

Tori

Tug shows up a few minutes before six. I open the door and feel my jaw start to drop. I snap it closed. Tug doesn’t look cute or adorable. He looks handsome, and fuckable. Oh, my God. I can’t even believe I just thought that. It’s so wrong, but Tug is hot. He’s in a black suit that fits his tall, lean frame exquisitely. His crisp white dress shirt is unbuttoned at the top without a tie. My eyes work along his square jaw. I look away. It’s Tug. I shouldn’t be having dirty thoughts about him.

My mother greets him with a hug and a kiss. “It’s so good to see you, Aidan,” she coos adoringly at him. She’ll never call him Tug. “I was thrilled when Tori said you were in town.” Her head nods in my direction. “She’s driving her dad and me nuts. She needs to get out.”

“Mom!” I admonish her.