If Tomorrow Never Comes (Harper Falls Book 2) (9 page)

"You included?" Alex asked.

"Nah, when I hit the legal drinking age I was across the country trying to keep this guy motivated. Between football and women, it's a wonder he made anything of himself."

"You know, Alex, to hear my partner tell it you'd think
I'd
been a party boy and he'd lived
his
life as a monk. Most of the women who slept over at our apartment were in his room, not mine."

Drew scoffed good-naturedly. "Only because you rarely got home with them. I don't know if you're aware of this, Alex, but our friend is a bit of an exhibitionist. In the back of his car, up against a bathroom wall, on the fifty-yard line."

"Now that wasn't my fault," Jack protested. "Myra Jenner had this idea that it would be cool to get the chalk line from the field down her back so she could show it off to her sorority sisters. It would have been rude to say no."

Alex leaned back enjoying the friendly banter. He could tell it wasn't the first time the two men had ribbed each other on the subject. They had an ease together that could only come when you knew someone as well as you knew yourself. Alex could see himself being friends with Drew. He saw a lot of himself in the other man. But he doubted they would ever reach the level of ease they both felt around Jack. That took time and neither of them was the type to open up easily.

Jack, on the other hand, was everybody's friend. Easy going, quick to smile and fast to forget, Jack invited the world in. But only a select few were allowed deeper than the surface. Those who really knew him got to see an intense man, driven to be the best. Unfailingly loyal, if Jack loved you, you were loved for life. It might have been ten years, but Alex had found it easy to fall back into the rhythm of their earlier friendship. Jack didn't allow walls, not when you were someone he cared about.

"Ready for another?"

Drew's question pulled Alex back from his thoughts. He tested the level of his bottle.

"Sure, I'll have one more. Besides, Jack's driving and unless he's changed I know he won't over indulge."

Drew seemed to find that hilarious, almost doubling over with laughter.

"Did I miss something?" Alex asked, looking back and forth between a gasping Drew and a disgruntled Jack.

"While I go get the beer, have Jack tell you about the last time he
over indulged.
Believe me, it's epic."

"Epic?" Drew asked, intrigued.

"Probably a bit of an exaggeration," Jack shrugged. After thinking about it, he seemed to change his mind. "I'll fill you in and you can make up your own mind."

Alex listened, his own laughter ringing out more than once. By the time Drew returned Jack had finished and Alex was shaking his head in amazement.

"And you expect me to believe Rose let you get away with that. You're either glossing over the juicy bits or you have found yourself a singular woman, my friend."

"I like that,
singular
, it's very old world. From now on I insist on you describing me that way, Jack."

Alex had been so wrapped up in Jack's story that he'd completely missed the entrance of Rose O'Brian. Any other time it would have bothered him—he prided himself on being aware, not letting even the smallest detail slip past his notice. He quickly reminded himself he was in the United States, not a hostile foreign country. Besides, letting his guard down for a few hours was a good thing—proof he was moving on from his Army days. It was only when he saw Rose's companions that he mentally kicked himself for forgetting a very important rule that a man should follow, soldier or civilian. Relax, even for a moment, and get walloped with a big kick to the gut.

"You, my love, are the most singular woman I've ever known." Jack stood and enveloped his fiancee´ in a welcoming hug. "But your friends are a close second."

"Would you listen to the man?" Rose turned to her friends, a twinkle in her amber colored eyes. "Charm drips from his pores 24/7."

"Are you complaining?" Jack pulled her closer with a mock growl. His mouth hovered over hers, inches from claiming a kiss.

Suddenly, all the teasing left Rose's expression. She smoothed a hand over Jack's face, her caress gentle but telling. Love radiated from this couple, strong and true.

"I have everything I could ever want, right here, right now. No complaints."

Their kiss, so full of emotion, might have been uncomfortable to witness if Alex had been paying attention. The moment he saw Dani everything else in the room faded into the background.

It had been five years since he had been this close to her, close enough to reach out and touch. He knew how her skin would feel, how unbelievably soft it would be under his calloused fingertips. It was a heady thought, knowing how near he was to the woman he craved like his next breath.

The last time he'd seen her, asleep and heartbreakingly beautiful, was supposed to have been the last time he would
ever
see her. That morning in Portugal, the sun barely a whisper of light over the distant hills, seemed like yesterday. God, how he'd wanted to take her in his arms one last time, kiss her goodbye with a silent promise to love her until the day he died. Instead, he honored her wishes and snuck away before she woke.

The Dani in front of him now wasn't soft and inviting. Back straight as a board, her arms crossed over her chest, her green eyes were impossible to read. That was new. She had never been able to hide her emotions; they used to shine from her as bright as the emeralds her gaze resembled. Her complete openness was one of the things that had first drawn him to her. He'd spent so much time with people trained to lie, who had been at it for so long that they automatically told you the blue sky was green. Until he met Dani, Alex had almost forgotten what it was like to speak without measuring every word first. She had been a breath of desperately needed fresh air.

It was ridiculous to have thought she wouldn't have changed in five years, but Alex couldn't stop the twinge of regret. The world had a way of wearing down even the purest of souls, Jordanna Wilde appeared to be no exception.

"Hello, Dani."

It was so brief that Alex was sure he imagined hitch in her breath. The slight curving of her mouth held no warmth and only barely resembled a smile.

"You two know each other?"

"We've met," Dani said, her eyes never leaving Alex's. "Though I wasn't sure Alex remembered me."

"Oh, I remember, all right. Every last detail."

Dani's eyes widened; this time there was no mistaking the increased rise and fall of her chest.

"Well, I should hope so." Jack, unaware of the increasing tension, grinned at his friend. "If nothing else, who could forget that hair."

"It was black." They spoke the words together and this time Dani's smile was genuine, though still reserved.

"Excuse me?" Drew had been silent up till now. He'd had his usual reaction to seeing Tyler; happiness, sadness, longing, anger. They rolled over him like unwelcome friends. Whatever was going on between Dani and Alex had caught his attention—a welcome distraction.

"When we met Dani had cut off all her hair and dyed it black," Alex returned her smile. "It suited her."

"Really?" Jack studied Dani for a moment. "I can't see it."

"Here." Rose had pulled up a picture on her phone and held it out to Jack.

"Wow." He looked at the image of a twenty-two-year-old Dani, hair almost as short as his own. The stark black color made her pale skin almost glow and her cocky smile made him laugh at her obvious joy.

"I never would have recognized you."

Jack passed the phone to Drew. He looked at the picture, then at Dani, and back at the picture.

"Amazing. Alex is right; it did suit you, but it just doesn't seem like
you
."

"I know," Dani conceded. "But for two weeks it was."

"Only two weeks?"

Dani shrugged off Drew's question. She wasn't going to explain how the morning she woke up alone, she had gone back to the same salon that had cut and dyed her hair, and had the woman change the color back. She wasn't going to tell him that she hadn't been able to stand the thought of looking in the mirror to see
that
girl anymore. The girl who had been born the day she'd met Alex and died the day he left.

"I need some wine," Dani announced. They had only just gotten there and it already felt like hours. Needing to get away, she made her way to the bar.

This was only the second time she had been to
Tom Tom's.
The last time the place had been packed, you couldn't hear yourself think. Tonight was quieter. She didn't have to wedge her way through cracks in the crowd. It didn't take her five minutes to cross the room. Right then she would have welcomed the noise and the teaming masses. Anything that distracted her from her gloomy thoughts.

"Can I buy you a drink?"

Dani's fists tightened at her sides. Alex—the same first words. Different bar, different part of the world, old enough to know better. And still Dani felt her heart rate jump.

"I would have thought you'd have gotten a different pick-up line by now."

Dani turned, silently cursing as her eyes automatically tracked the movement of his lower lip as he smiled. You might hope for change, but some things were destined to remain the same. She'd been a sucker for that mouth five years ago and it seemed she still was.

"If it ain't broke, well, you know."

For the first time that night, Alex knew what Dani was thinking, and he wanted to pound his head into the wall. What an idiot.

"You were the first and the last woman I ever said that to, Dani," he said. "I was never smooth enough to have any lines."

"You seemed plenty smooth to me." Dani felt herself relaxing a bit. "It wasn't what you said, it was how you said it."

Alex knew what she meant. For two weeks, every word out of his mouth had been the truth. At twenty-three, he had spent a big portion of his adult life steeped in subterfuge. Lies meant success, often they meant survival. But with Dani, none of that had been necessary. When he told her she was beautiful that no other woman could hold a candle to her, it had been said with complete sincerity, complete honesty. He had relished the freedom to speak his thoughts without censoring them first. It was sad to realize that after he'd left her the cloak of lies had descended again with startling ease and had remained firmly in place ever since.

"Did you know I was here?" Dani mentally kicked herself. She hadn't wanted to ask, but she needed to know more than she needed her pride.

"Yes."

Dani opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He knew—did he care?

"I have a lot to say, Dani," Alex began. "I think we both do. Why don't I get us a couple of drinks and we'll sit, try to make a dent in it."

"Make mine whiskey, double."

Alex ordered—he stuck with beer—and followed her to a booth across the room from their friends. This was private, no interruptions wanted.

Taking a healthy swig, Dani sat her drink back down and waited. Whatever had to be said, Alex had to start. He didn't owe her explanations, but he seemed ready to make them. As he gathered his thoughts, she took the time to look at him,
really look
.

Gorgeous. Nothing had changed there. Dani could see a few lines just starting around his eyes and he was just as tan as before, which told her he spent time in the sun, squinting. His dark hair was no longer in a ruthless military cut and the longer length suited him. It had a tendency to curl, just on the ends, laying in thick waves that touched the collar of his pale green t-shirt. She was about to let her eyes make the pleasant journey over the rest of him when Alex cleared his throat.

Dani jumped, afraid she had been caught ogling, but to her relief it appeared Alex hadn't noticed.

"I didn't know what to say," he began, obviously nervous. "I still don't."

Dani felt the same, her stomach in a knot. Everything seemed so important, as though the words they were about to speak would change the course of the world, or at least
their
world.

"I didn't expect to ever see you again, Dani. My choice, I know. But it felt like the right one for both of us. I can never tell you what I was involved in. There's a reason for that old saying "
loose lips sink ships".
Corny, yes, but accurate."

"I don't want military secrets, Alex." Dani had never cared that he had to keep those things from her. She was patriotic enough to be proud of his commitment to his country and fellow servicemen. What she had never understood was his notion that he couldn't have his career and her—or any woman—long term. It made no sense then or now.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming to Harper Falls? Why let me find out they way I did? And why act like you didn't recognize me?"

All good questions, Alex thought; reasonable, even. His only answer, beyond being a fucking coward, was that he'd kept silent because he couldn't stand the thought of her telling him to stay away, that she didn't care anymore.

And why act like he didn't recognize her? Because all he had wanted to do was to gather her into his arms and never let go. Because he didn't have the right; not now, maybe not ever.

"It's been five years, Dani." Wow, that sounded lame, even to him.

"We were friends," Dani said, puzzled. "Lovers, yes, but we liked each other. I know I'm not misremembering that."

"No."

"You could have called, texted, emailed. Hey, guess what, I'm moving to Harper Falls, let's get together and reminisce."

"Reminisce?"

"Jesus, Alex, work with me here." Dani tossed back the rest of her whiskey, one quick swallow. The burn made her gasp, and she took a moment, her breathing slowly returning to normal.

"I'm at a loss," she finally said. "I came here tonight because I thought it would make it easier, you know, get the initial meeting out of the way. It was either that or duck into alleys or nearby buildings every time I saw you on the street." She leaned her head to the side, drawing his attention back to their friends. "You've met Tyler and you work for Drew. I've witnessed those two idiots play that game for over a year—I'm not interested."