If Tomorrow Never Comes (Harper Falls Book 2) (6 page)

So the lady wanted to play. That was fine with him. Alex had never been a big fan of these kinds of games—sex was serious business. But Dani was different, and he was different with her.

He walked the few steps between them with a measured gait, his eyes not on hers but on the inconvenient scrap of material.

"Are you fond of these?"

Dani gasped. The feel of his finger running down her stomach and stopping just before he touched lace made her skin come alive. She had been cold, but now she was hot, almost feverish.

"What?" She knew he had asked an important question. Yes? That seemed like a safe answer. All she wanted to tell him was yes.

Alex leaned closer, his breath brushing her ear.

"I'm about to eviscerate your panties."

"Yes." Yes to everything.

Even expecting it, Dani had to gasp when he tore the offending lace from her body. It was a surprise, it was foreplay. The way he wrapped an arm around her waist to hold her still, the way he slowly pulled the material from between her legs. She could count on one finger the number of times a man had given her an orgasm, and that had been more her effort than his. Alex had barely touched her and she was about to go off like an overwound alarm clock.

"You should take your clothes off."

Alex lifted his mouth from the trail he had been making down the arch of her neck.

"Are you in charge?"

"No," Dani moaned again. He had replaced his mouth with the back of his fingers, the touch soft and agonizingly brief.

"Remember that. I'll take my clothes off when I'm ready."

"Fine, but I'm not calling you Master."

Alex hid his smile. She was a pistol, his Dani. He wouldn't say it out loud, he couldn't. But he knew that was how he would always think of her because when tonight was over, that's what she would be.
His
.

She was learning so much about Alex Fleming. He liked to take his time, his actions thorough, leaving no inch of her skin untouched. Sometimes, if the fancy hit him, he would retrace his steps and lavish his attention on a spot he'd visited only moments before. Not that she was complaining. She was all for a slow ride. But, God, she wanted to kiss him.

"Bite my lip."

Dani's eyes flew open. Alex was right in front of her, his mouth a hairs breath way.

"Alex?"

"You said you wanted to bite my lip."

Her eyes dropped to that full, sexy piece of flesh that had been tormenting her from the moment they had met. "I did. I do." So very much.

"I want it, too."

Her mouth suddenly dry, Dani swallowed. Taking a deep breath, she leaned in. It was even better up close. Her tongue came out and tasted once, twice. Alex stayed silent, but she could feel his hands tighten on her waist. She blew a warm breath, a quick salutation, and then closed her teeth on his lip. She didn't bite hard—the last thing she wanted was to hurt him. It was more of a nip before pulling it into her mouth and lavishing it with attention, first by sucking, then by again licking.

Dani didn't know when her actions had morphed into a full on kiss, nor did she care. At some point, Alex had taken charge, and Dani melted. It didn't take her long to realize this was the first time in her life that she was being kissed by a true master of the art.

Alex plunged his tongue into Dani's mouth. So sweet, so hot. He could kiss her for hours and never grow tired of the little sounds she made, sounds that fed his ego and told him she liked everything he was doing.

"Your kisses taste like heaven, Jordanna."

Dani's brain had started to tumble. Her thoughts were becoming less and less coherent. But she heard that. No one called her Jordanna. Never. But coming from Alex, his voice rough with passion? It was suddenly the most beautiful name in the world.

"How does the rest of you taste?"

Alex's lips burned across her stomach, never losing touch as he lowered himself to his knees. Dani waited, eyes closed, for the first feel of his mouth where she needed it most. She knew she was wet, her tissue swollen with need. It wasn't going to take much to send her over the edge.

"Now, what have we here?"

"I hope to God you've seen between a woman's legs before, soldier."

"That sassy mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble one of these days, but right now, I'm more interested in this." Alex ran his fingers over the unimaginably soft, hair-free skin. "I didn't think good girls from Washington went to Brazil."

To be honest, Dani had forgotten. Getting everything waxed had been another stab at rebellion. It felt wicked and decadent, something she hadn't expected anyone else to see. Squinting, she tried to gauge his reaction.

"It's new."

"And smooth." He lifted his gaze. Locking his eyes with hers, he slowly leaned in and took his first taste. Their groans of pleasure were simultaneous. Their thoughts synced.

That was amazing
.
Again
.

Dani didn't know how she remained standing. She found herself gripping Alex's head for balance, and to keep him doing what he was doing Her body felt liquid. At any moment, she could melt, her bones dissolving into a pool of bliss.

"Alex," she breathed, her fingers digging deeper into his scalp.

"Let yourself go, baby. I've got you."

His words and his magic tongue sent her over. Lights burst before her eyes and her heart tried to jump from her chest. She was vaguely aware of Alex lifting her and depositing her on the bed. It wasn't until he joined her, pulling her close, that she was able to string together a coherent thought.

"You've done that before."

"But I've never enjoyed it so much."

Dani smiled. "Good answer." She shifted closer, noticing for the first time that he had shed this clothes.

It was a little disappointing—she had wanted to watch. But having access to all his warm, male skin made up for it. She had to touch him. She couldn't get enough of the dips and planes that made his body so gloriously different from her own. When she would have reached between his legs, eager to take his erection in her hand, Alex stopped her.

"Not a good idea, I'm too close."

"I'm sure you have more than one go in you, old man."

"As you will find out. But I want the first to be inside you."

It was only when he rolled them over and positioned himself between her legs that Dani realized that he had put on a condom. How could you not love a man who thought of your protection when you were too far gone to do it yourself. And it was love—her brain didn't stutter over the thought. It didn't matter how long she'd known him or ultimately how short their time together would be. For the first time in her life, Dani was in love.

She couldn't say the words out loud. It wouldn't be fair. But she could will him to see it. As he entered her, Dani let her eyes cry out her feelings. All he had to do was look and he would know.

Alex was close. Dani. Sweet, sweet Dani. No woman had ever affected him like this. The control he had always been so proud of eluded him. He was relieved when he felt that she was just as near the end as he was, that he was going to bring her pleasure before he found his own. He'd long ago lost track of how many women he had been with. But what he had told her had been the truth—this
was
better. This was the best. He had always been able to walk away without a backward glance, but this time it would hurt because, unlike all those countless women, Dani mattered. She would never be the blurred face of someone he'd used to relieve the loneliness and stress of his job.

They orgasmed together. Dani didn't know if it was because she wanted it so badly, maybe she imagined something that wasn't really there. But when her eyes declared her love, for a fleeting moment, she had been certain his eyes had answered,
I love you, too
.

THEY SPENT EVERY
moment of every day together. Dani still had a job to do, but it didn't get in the way of her time with Alex. If anything, he was able to help. Alex knew people that Dani never would have had access to. Through him, she found out about a rooftop swimming pool in the heart of Lisbon. The owner hosted some of the most exclusive parties in the city, and somehow Alex got them invitations. Dani knew how to take pictures without being noticed—besides, all of the faces would be blurred for publication. It was a coup, one that photographers with years more experience couldn't deliver.

Around midnight, when the party goers lost their bathing suits and had a group skinny dip, Dani put away her camera. It wasn't
that
kind of magazine
.
One eyebrow raised, Alex gave her a questioning look. She glanced towards the pool, then back at him. It was a light-hearted group and she trusted Alex to keep her safe. She nodded and with a carefree laugh, they dropped their suits and jumped.

"PROMISE ME ONE
thing, Alex."

They were back at her hotel, wrapped in each others arms. Their lovemaking—Dani refused to think of it any other way—had been slow and sweet. Alex always seemed to know what she needed. From their first time to this one, and all the many in between, he gave her so much more than a mind blowing orgasm. He instinctively reached into her emotions and found a way to be her everything. Dominant, playful, intense. They were all Alex, and she was starting to wonder how she was going to live without him.

"If I can." No automatic yeses from Alex.

"It might be easier if you lied." Dani lightly bit his shoulder to accent her words. "You could make me promises you have no intention of keeping, give me false hope."

"And eventually you would hate me for it," Alex explained. "I might have to leave, but I don't have to leave you with a nasty taste in your mouth."

"That's not likely—I love the way you taste—all of you."

Alex knew she was trying to lighten the mood, but he wanted her to understand. He was going to think of her—often. And he needed to know that after he was gone, the memories he left her with were the best they could possibly be. Lies were corrosive—he wanted Dani to remember him as a man of honor, one who kept his word.

"I love the way you taste too, Dani. I will carry your unique flavor with me no matter where I am."

It was the closest to a declaration she was going to get. Not hearts and flowers for them. The plain and simple truth was her Valentine.

"Promise me that when you leave, you won't say goodbye."

"Dani." Alex didn't like the idea of sneaking away like a thief in the night. His leave was coming to an end. Three more days, that was all the time they had left. There had been no emergency calls—for once the world had maintained a semblance of order. He had been lucky enough to have this amazing woman in his life for a short but intense couple of weeks, and now she wanted to end it as though they were mere acquaintances—not lovers.

"It would kill me to watch you walk out my life forever, Alex." Dani was about to break their unspoken rule, but she wanted him to understand. "I love you. I can't help it, but I'm not sorry. You've made it clear from day one that when you leave I will never see you again."

"It wouldn't be fair to you, Dani."

Bullshit, she wanted to scream. Her emotions were rapidly becoming a chaotic mess. Somehow she maintained a thin hold on her outward calm.

"Your choice, not mine." She felt him stiffen, but she didn't care. Why should this be easy? Her heart was breaking. She had promised herself to let him go, didn't she deserve the chance to deliver some honesty of her own?

"I don’t want to cry because believe me, I cry ugly. Heaving sobs, blotchy face, runny nose. That can't be your last memory of me. Me bawling like a two-year-old can't be the image you carry around burned into your brain. So I'm asking you, when the time comes, don't tell me. It will be easier."

So Alex promised. Not because he dreaded an uncomfortable goodbye, or because he was put off by a few tears. He agreed because she asked him, and because he loved her. He wouldn't say it out loud, where there was love there was hope, and Alex couldn't allow her to harbor even a glimmer of that. Instead, he gave her the only two things that were his to give. Verbally he gave her his promise—silently he gave her his heart.

DANI SAT UP in bed with a start. She felt disoriented, out of place. And then she remembered. She had been dreaming of the morning she woke up alone. This wasn't Portugal, she was no longer twenty-two and madly in love. Like that long ago morning she found herself reaching for Alex and just like then, she found the other side of her bed empty and horribly cold.

When was the last time she'd had that particular dream? Dani racked her brain but couldn't come up with a definitive answer. It used to be a frequent visitor, always leaving her empty and out of sorts for hours. As sick as it sounded, it had become such a part of her that after she finally stopped having it, she had missed the ache it left behind. The end of her dream seemed to signify the end of Alex. She needed to leave him behind, the same way she had
all
the remnants of her girlhood. Letting Alex go had been her last transition, a symbolic gesture of boxing up her dolls or taking down the pictures of her favorite teen idols. She couldn't keep turning to Alex in her sleep, hoping he would suddenly materialize when she opened her eyes.

So she let Alex go. It hadn't been easy, but she had done it. She'd finally stopped dreaming of him and instead let herself dream of a future with a different man, a man she had yet to meet. Dani wanted love. She knew what the real thing looked like. Her parents were a shining example of what it meant to commit yourself to one person and work like hell to hold it together, no matter what. The love her mom and dad shared wasn't out of a glossy book filled with unattainable expectations. No, they were the real deal, and Dani was determined to find it for herself.

Unfortunately, love could not be forced. She might go into every new relationship full of hope, but love didn't materialize just because you wanted it to. Not that she hadn't had the chance to marry. She knew of at least three men who, if given an ounce of encouragement, would have proposed. But as much as she wanted a husband and children, she wasn't going to settle. One thing and one thing only would get her down the aisle—love.