If Tomorrow Never Comes (Harper Falls Book 2) (13 page)

"I know what you're thinking."

After one more shot, Dani lowered the camera and looked him directly in the eye.

"You'd have to be an idiot and two days dead not to."

"Jesus, Dani," Alex breathed. "I want you. That hasn't changed, it never will."

"Then why are you in there, not out here with me?" Her voice had taken on a husky quality she hadn't heard in five years—since the last time they made love.

"I'm in here
because
I want you so much."

"Just so I understand." Dani straightened, her gaze never leaving his as she toyed with the edge of her shirt. "The only thing stopping us from having sex," she wouldn’t call it making love, not yet, "is you're in there and I'm out here?"

"Too simple."

"What's complicated?"

Alex could actually feel his mouth start to water. One scant inch of skin above the waistband of her jeans and his body was reacting like a starving man to a Thanksgiving dinner. Not even the ice cold spring water was keeping his libido—or rather his cock—in check.

"Stop."

Dani raised her brows but followed his command and dropped the hem of her shirt.

"I'm not getting in and you're not getting out? Unless you've learned some mystic method, I'm guessing no sex."

Edgar sat, looking at them. Something was going on. Not anger, he knew that one. He had better things to do than try and sort out the intricacies of human emotions. Without another glance, he bounded off in pursuit of a rather cheeky squirrel that had been darting in and out of his view for the past few minutes.

"Is sex all you want?"

What she wanted was not to have this conversation. Not now.

"What are you, a tweenage girl? Big, bad Army man have a secret yen for YA literature?"

Figuring they'd moved past the danger zone and since he was way past ready to get on dry land, Alex waded out of the pond. He grabbed his shorts, pulling them on in one motion before turning back to Dani.

"YA, really?" he asked, using his hand to wipe the water from his face. "If that's the best insult you've got, we might as well stop the barbs before they even start."

"Oh, I've got better," she assured him. "But I'm not wasting my best material on you."

"Not worth the effort, huh?"

"That I didn't say, but I refuse to get all worked up with someone who's lost his follow through."

"Ouch."

Dani doubted her words caused much damage to his ego. She was just about to let him really have it when Alex bent to retrieve one of his shoes, exposing his right side to her. She knew his body, she'd explored every inch. The six inch, angry-looking scar hadn't been there before. It was red and puckered, and though her knowledge was limited, she would say relatively recent.

"Ouch, indeed."

Alex glanced up, wondering at the odd tone in her voice. Following the direction of her look, he had his answer.

"If you even try to make light of that," Dani warned, "I'll come over there and punch it, hard."

"It doesn't hurt anymore." Except in his dreams.

"How close did you come?"

"Not that close."

"Bullshit."

"Dani—,"

"You almost died," she breathed. She felt a pain in her heart so intense it almost brought her to her knees. Alex made a movement, ready to catch her, but Dani held up a hand, keeping him where he was. She pulled herself up, grabbing some reserve of strength. She was not going down in front of him, she wasn't going to let him save the day with his
manly
arms.

"You could have died and I never would have known."

"No."

"Because I have no right, I'm nothing to you."

Alex didn’t answer. Technically she was right. If he had died, the Army would have informed his sister and she would have borne the pain alone. He doubted his name would have made any news feed or even a local obituary. Dani might have found out, in a few years, long after the fact.

"All I ever wanted was to know you were out there. Happy. Alive."

"Then wouldn't it have been better not to know?"

"That sounds right, doesn't it?" She walked to him, this time choosing to drop to her knees, her eyes level with the scar. "Kind of like the old tree in a forest thing. If a man dies in the desert and no one tells the woman who," she swallowed the word loved, "cared about him, does she grieve?"

Her words and the sweet touch of her lips on the scar brought tears to Alex's eyes. He knew if she looked up her emerald gaze would be shining as well.

He gripped his thighs so he wouldn’t reach out. Her hair looked impossibly soft, bright and inviting. He kept his hands to himself, not trusting where a single touch might lead.

Gathering her emotions, Dani pulled back, getting to her feet.

"I'm sorry, that was a bit over the top." And more than a bit embarrassing.

"You never have to apologize to me, Dani. Especially not for caring."

"Everything is fine," she went to touch him again but stopped. "No lingering problems?"

"Fit as a fiddle." But massively screwed up in the head.

"Dreams? Nightmares?"

"How did…?"

Dani was starting to understand, even if he wasn't ready for her to.

"I dream of children, one moment alive, their future brighter than ever. The next lifeless, their blood turning the sand black."

She'd never told anyone that. She lived with the dreams. They were less frequent, but she knew they would never completely go away. To her, it would never be just another village; they would never be nameless, faceless victims. Someone had to remember.

"Is that why you walked away, why you came home?"

"It was time."

Alex nodded, understanding. He could have stayed. No one pushed him out; just the opposite. They'd been ready to promote him to full colonel—silver eagle, and all. He hadn’t thrown the offer back in their faces, but it had been a near thing. After ten years, he suddenly felt like he no longer understood what it was all about. You didn't reward a man for what he had done. Men under his command had died, that was nothing to celebrate.

"I'll never ask."

Alex felt his heart melt, just a little bit more. Somehow this woman got him, understood.

"I asked you."

Dani took his hand, still such a natural gesture, and squeezed.

"No one ever told me to keep it a secret. That was your whole existence. I can't expect you to start spilling just because you no longer wear a uniform.

Alex raised her hand to his lips, letting the kiss linger, just for a moment. She could always read his eyes, and the little flare he saw in her deep green depths told him that hadn't changed—she knew he wanted her mouth under his.

"Right," Dani said, pulling her hand away, her voice brisk. "How do you feel about hang gliding?"

"What?" He was still fantasizing about how she tasted and she jumped ahead to that?

"I'm taking my first lesson on Saturday, wanna come?"

"Are we hitting the friend zone, Dani?"

"Forget it, buddy. You're not getting off that easy."

Dani gathered up her gear and called for Edgar.

"Saturday we take a leap of faith, literally. We trust in our instructors, and sound engineering, to get us through. After that, we'll see about having faith in each other."

"YOU NEED TO get your head examined."

Dani was hosting bad movie night and they had just finished
The Deserter
starring Bekim Fehmiu.

"I like that movie, and I love Bekim. He was my major crush the summer I turned fourteen."

"We remember," Tyler and Rose chimed in together.

"And we can talk about your strange taste in movie stars another time." Tyler took a handful of popcorn, tossing a piece in her mouth. "I meant it's crazy to jump off a mountain for no other reason than, and I say this with love, you're twisted love of adventure."

"Seems like the perfect reason to me," Dani reasoned, not the least bit offended. "Better than doing it because someone wants to kill me and I have no other choice."

"What does it say about you that your brain jumps to the threat of death?"

"Too many James Bond movies?" Dani said with a grin. "I love the opening of
For Your Eyes Only.
"

"Rank your Bonds," Rose cried out enthusiastically.

Tyler was the biggest fan, so she gladly dropped the subject of hang gliding deaths and jump on board.

"Connery number one."

"Goes without saying," Rose agreed.

"Then Craig, newbie but jumps to number two, no doubt."

"David Niven."

Rose and Tyler exchanged looks and mutual eye rolls.

"No."

"Lame 1960's Casino Royale doesn't count," Tyler said emphatically.

"I say Niven trumps Dalton, lame movie or not."

Her friends had no comeback for that one. Timothy Dalton might have the great blue eyes, but he was no James Bond.

They finished the list quickly after that, though they could never quite agree on George Lazenby, and got back to the next
it is so bad it's good
movies.

Four hours later, the three friends had turned off the tv, happy with their choices of mindless entertainment. Snacks had been consumed, and a comfortable silence had descended over the room.

Dani loved moments like this. Nothing outside mattered, there were no problems, no worries. Eventually they would open the door to the rest of the world, but for tonight, nothing could touch them. As long as they had each other, they were invincible.

"HANG GLIDING? REALLY?"

It was Monday morning and Alex had just walked into the main building at H&W. He had plenty of paperwork to keep him busy and was mentally running through the calls he needed to return and what could wait when Jack called out through the open door of his office.

More than happy to stop and shoot the breeze with the boss, Alex walked to the chair nearest Jack's desk and dropped onto the seat.

"Dani asked if I wanted to go, I said yes."

Jack waited patiently for his friend to elaborate, but quickly realized that wasn't going to happen. Luckily Jack felt comfortable asking a few probing questions.

"So you're dating?"

"Who's dating?" Drew came in, flopping down in the other chair. Alex figured this was standard—visiting between offices. But discussing his personal life added a new wrinkle for the partners, one they both seemed to be enjoying a bit too much for his comfort.

"Alex and Dani."

"Can't blame you there, she's a doll."

"First of all," Alex said firmly. "We aren't dating. We went hang gliding, as friends, nothing more. Second, never call her a doll to her face if you don't want her to punch you in yours. She earned that black belt in Karate honestly, and she 's never had a problem letting someone find out, sometimes the hard way."

"She looks like a Disney princess but is a total badass," Jack agreed. "Though I wonder if she might have a bit of a death wish. She's always jumping into, onto or off of something. Thank God Rose isn't interested in following. But you, my friend, need to decide if it's your dick or your brain making your decisions where she and her adventures are concerned."

"Wait, am I missing something?" Drew asked, looking at the other two men. "You didn’t just meet Dani?"

"They met in Portugal, what, five years ago?"

"About that," Alex nodded. It made sense that Rose would have filled Jack in, but to what extent, he didn't know. He planned on keeping the intimate details to himself.

"Small world," Drew said.

"Minuscule," Jack agreed, shaking his head at Alex. "I hadn't even started seeing Rose when I offered you this job, and it turns out she and Dani are best friends. And don't get me started on
this
guy and his history with my lady's
other
best friend."

"You mean the crazy one of the three? Do you know what she called me?"

And now they were talking about Tyler and Drew. Alex was all for the shift in focus. It might be hypocritical, but he wouldn't mind getting the intel on Dani's friends.

"Is she talking to you now?" Jack asked, surprised by the turn of events.

"Oh, she's talking alright, " Drew grumbled. "I wanted that, right? She stops treating me like an inanimate object, we start a dialogue and…"

"And all is right with the world," Jack finished for him. "So what went wrong?"

"She propositioned me. You know, sex, scratch an itch once or twice, end of story."

"And you said no? Are you crazy?"

"I'm thinking of getting a professional opinion on that," Drew admitted. "But here's the worst part."

"Worse than saying no to sex with the woman you've been in love with since you were seventeen?" Jack turned to Alex. "Can you believe this guy?"

Alex didn't think he had any room to judge. His situation with Dani might have a few different angles, but the similarities were almost frightening. Drew obviously wanted Tyler, but something was holding him back. Jack might find it hard to sympathize, but Alex didn't.

Not waiting for Alex to answer, Drew jumped to his feet and started pacing.

"She had the nerve to accuse me of acting like a Victorian virgin."

Jack burst out laughing.

"Oh, come on," he laughed again, despite Drew's glare. "That is priceless though you're more of a
born again
Victorian virgin."

"Damn it, she's calling me a prude. Me! She was there for some of my most over the top moments—you wouldn't believe the places we had sex."

"But what have you done for her lately."

"Shit," Drew turned on Alex, "you too?"

"Sorry, it just popped out."

"But he's right," Jack stood and moved to the coffee pot near his desk. He held up the pot, but Alex and Drew both shook their heads.

"I'm not giving her sex and then walking away."

"No, but you could give in, enjoy what you both want, and
not
walk away."

"If it were that easy I'd be with her right now."

"Drew, you have a call from London." The voice of Pam, their personal assistant, came over the intercom.

"Saved by the bell"

Drew left, throwing Jack the middle finger as a goodbye salute.