Hurting To Feel (Carpool Dolls) (15 page)

Then
he was going to beat her to forget what seeing her here did to him.

Not
waiting around to get any answers, he hustled her to his car, and drove away.
He focused on the road ahead of him, not even tempted to peer into the rearview
mirror behind him. He'd never survive if he looked back to the familiar, to the
comfort, to his past life.

"Nathan,
slow down!" Addison clutched his arm.

He
eased off the accelerator and downshifted. "I'll drop you off at work, and
I expect you waiting for me at seven. Do not give me any reason to doubt
you."

"Nathan,
you can't–"

"Don't
fuck with me, Addy." He pulled to the curb and stopped the car in front of
Car Pools. "I'm this close to dragging your ass home and showing you
exactly how pissed I am that I found you under the bridge…with that
child."

"W-what?
Lilly?" Her face transformed from confusion to anger. "She's sick.
Bad sick. Do you know what happens to a baby with strep throat that goes
untreated? She could die or get scarlet fever. I will not let that
happen."

He
turned his head. "Be here at seven."

The
door opened and slammed. Only then did he turn to make sure she entered the
office building. Now that she was out of sight, he closed his eyes and let the
anger rage inside of him. He welcomed the tension, the coil spiraling inside of
him, feeding him.

Several
minutes later, he'd checked himself enough to drive. He wanted to linger
behind, luxuriating in the one emotion that completed him but knowing he'd have
to wait.

Entering
the highway, he inhaled deeply. He admitted one good thing that happened today.
Addison continued to push the boundaries.

He
hadn't dictated what she could do while she was working. On a whim, he'd decided
to cut his day in half and surprise her for lunch. When he arrived and spotted
her hurrying down the sidewalk, he thought to watch her and learn what kind of
day she typically had when she was away from him.

Never
had he thought she'd step into his world. Never would he want her near the
lifestyle of those living on the streets. Never in his thoughts of what today
would be like did he believe she'd give him a reason to let go so soon after
last night.

He'd
been willing to wait. Asking her to deal with him after he'd hurt her last
night would be inconsiderate. She denied the level of pain he'd laid on her.

But,
he missed none of it. The stiffness when she walked. The bruises, hidden from
the eyes of others, but he knew they were there. He'd marked her.

Without
explaining himself, he wanted her to know whom she belonged to and what she
could have. His dick hardened. He wanted to give everything to her.

Even
his pain.

Never
had he met a woman strong enough to handle him. He rested his wrist on the
steering wheel. The mix of anger and lust burned deep within him.

Until
he picked up Addison tonight, he'd simmer in the pleasure of knowing that
tonight, he'd have her again. And, she'd be thankful for what he could do for
her.

Chapter
Seventeen

If
Nathan wanted to prove what an asshole he was, he'd succeeded. Addison tapped
her foot and watched the clock strike seven. Messing with her was one thing.
Screw with a child's health and wellbeing crossed the line.

Out
of sorts all day over what went on between them last night, she'd snapped out
of questioning her sanity when Nathan hauled her away as if she'd done
something wrong. He, of all people, had to understand the plights that affected
homeless families.

The
lack of medical and dental care, an inadequate diet, and exposure to the
elements killed people every day. A child's fragile state took the worst of the
dangers.

She
grabbed her purse, shut down the computer, closed the blinds, and looked at the
clock again. Five after seven.

He
could wait until she was ready to deal with him. Deliberately stalling to tick
him off, she took the stairs. Then she watered the Fuchsia's in the corner of
the lobby. When she no longer could find anything else for her to do, she
walked out the door and locked the building.

Nathan
leaned against his car, arms crossed, ankles crossed, his mood crossed. Yeah,
she'd won.

In
her anger, she'd forgotten how scary he could look in person. She also ignored
how she reacted to him when he terrified her, which made her hate herself. Her
nipples peaked and she pulled all her disgust to the surface. This time, she
would not cower to him.

She
stood in the middle of the sidewalk. "I did nothing wrong. Lilly is just a
baby, and whatever you want to do to me, do it. Nothing will stop me from going
back there in a few days to check on her. Even when she's better, I'll continue
to check up on her mother. I hope to one day have her working for me, and I
won't give up until that baby has a roof over her head and a soft place to lay
down when she has a sore throat. So, if you want to fuck me, push me around,
and take everything I got, go ahead."

He
continued to stare. Her whole body shook. Refusing to back down on this one
subject, she glared back at him.

"Say
something, dammit," she said.

Still,
he stood there without a care in the world, not concerned if he'd hurt her or
ruined what they'd started. She marched to him and poked him in the chest.
"If you're mad, then tell me. I hate when you do this. Do you hear me?
Hate you!"

She
hadn't even known she was crying until the salty taste of tears flowed on her
lips. She grabbed his shirt and shook him. "She's a baby—she sobbed—I hate
you, hate you, hate you."

Exhausted,
she laid her forehead on his chest. Her cries continued after her feet left the
ground, and even afterward when he set her in his car and buckled the seatbelt.
Desperation for him to understand her motives with Lilly mixed with her extreme
fright over him walking away from her.

By
the time Nathan pulled the BMW into his garage, she'd calmed. Content to sit
with her arms around her waist and not think, she stayed where she was.

Nathan
opened her door, undid her seatbelt, and picked her up. She buried her head
into his shoulder and closed her eyes. The need to know what he was thinking
and why he disapproved of her no longer concerned her.

When
he laid her on the bed and stepped away, she shot up. Her whole body
constricted, and she scrambled off the bed and lunged at him.

He
held her away from him, his hands on her shoulders. "Stop."

"Please,
don't leave," she said, hating the whine in her voice.

"Doll,
I'm going to get you some Tylenol." He turned her around and pushed her
toward the bed.

She
whirled around and grabbed him. "No. Don't go."

The
raw panic building inside of her burst out. She fought the hands that grabbed
her. Blinded to what he was doing, she reeled at the sudden pain at the back of
her head.

He
fisted her hair, holding her in place away from him, and pushed her down on her
knees. "Got your attention now?"

Her
body hummed. She wanted to beg and scream, but all her attention went to the
front of his trousers where he was undoing his belt with his free hand.

"You're
not going anywhere." He pulled the leather out of the loops on his pants
and ran the end under her chin. "I'm going to take my hand off you. Don't
move or you'll feel the edge of my belt on your skin."

Her
vision clouded. "Nathan, I—"

"Don't
talk." His fingers let go.

Her
scalp prickled as the strands fell back into place sending a shiver down her
spine. She held her breath as he walked behind her. His hands stroked her arms,
pulling them back until her wrists crossed. Her chin dropped to her chest when she
realized he bound her arms behind her to her ankles.

She
tugged, and Nathan grabbed her hair to keep her from falling forward.
"Don't move."

He
walked around her, twisting her hair, immobilizing her. Standing in front of
her, he undid the zipper of his slacks, freeing his erection.

She
strained against his hold, needing his heat, wanting him inside of her,
possessing her, showing her he'd never leave. He stepped forward, cock in hand,
and she opened her mouth and closed her eyes.

"Look
at me." He tapped her cheek with the edge of his sex.

She'd
barely opened her eyes when he took his hardness and slapped her with it again.
Her pussy spasmed and she widened her knees, tilting her head up higher and
gazed into his face.

Stern
and unforgiving, he watched her intently while rubbing his dick along the
length of her neck. "If I ever catch you talking, walking, looking at the
people on the street, I will beat you until you're too sore to walk out the
door."

She
bit her lip to keep her teeth from chattering. Although her body warmed when
he'd pushed her to her knees, the fear of what he could do left her trembling. The
thrill of what he could make her do overpowered everything else happening, and
she opened herself to anything he gave her.

He
pulled on her hair, and when she cried out from the startling pain, he stuck
his cock in her mouth. She sucked greedily, pulling on his hold, needing him to
fill her.

His
hips thrust forward. She gagged, but went right back to taking his length into
her mouth. She closed her eyes and moaned low in her throat.

"No."
He removed his cock. "Look. At. Me."

She
shook her head, or as much as she could with him pinning her to the spot with
his hand. "Please…"

Pain
radiated up her cheek. She blinked in time to watch his hand come back and
swing toward her again. She steeled herself against the pain, but it never
came.

"I
will prove to you as many times as you need, until you understand, I will not
leave you," he said, letting his motion continue.

Her
head snapped to the left on a shudder. The air in her lungs whooshed out, and
she stared at the carpet. A calm she'd missed all day swept over her.

"You
will learn that only I can truly care for you." He yanked her head.

He
stroked his length viciously, almost painful for her to watch. His fist moved
fast, coming to the end of his cock, and brushed her cheek with each pump. Her
panties grew damp and she sat back on her ankles.

"You
breathe, because of me. You get up in the fucking morning, because I'm the one
who put you to bed and watched over you all night while you slept." He
grunted, straining as he jerked himself.

With
each promise, her body accepted her position and screamed yes. She wanted him
to stay, to take care of her, to keep her safe, and never leave.

He
fisted the root of his cock and whipped his dick across her mouth. She licked
her lips, tasting his pre-cum and the tang of blood where her lip hit her
eyetooth. Pleasure coiled in her core.

He
pulled back. "No. Do not come."

She
rocked. The belt pulled on her arms. She ached inside, between her legs, her
breasts.

Nathan
leaned over, unbuckled her arms from her legs. She fell forward, and he caught
her.

Without
giving her a chance to move, he scooped her under the arms. She locked her arms
around his neck. Her dress got in the way of raising her legs, and she kicked
out against his legs trying to find traction.

Nathan
tossed her on the bed, and then landed on top of her. Her breath whooshed out,
but the pressure. God, the pressure. He was here. He stayed with her.

She
squirmed until one leg escaped out from under him, and she hooked the back of
his knee. Holding him in place, she grabbed his neck, pulled her head up off
the mattress, and captured his mouth.

"Want
it rough," he murmured against her lips.

She
sucked at his bottom lip. "Yes. Yes. Yes."

His
hand yanked up her dress. A rip
zzz'd
in the room, and she kicked her
other leg to the side, holding him in the V of her legs.

He
removed her hands, and clasped them in one of his above her head. While he
rolled to the left and without taking her panties off, pulled the material to
the side and plunged into her. As if she had a seizure, she rapidly jolted underneath
him at the pleasure of having him stretched her.

Searing
pain at the intrusion, the force, the size of him added to the intoxication.
Unable to move her arms, she bucked underneath him until he fucked her so
roughly it left her impaired. She lay there, taking his passion, his anger, his
attention and soaking in the knowledge that he was here. As long as he was
inside of her, stroking her, pounding on her, she had proof that she belonged
with him.

Her
heels dug into the mattress and she screamed. All the frustration boiled inside
of her.

Then
he was gone. She panicked, pulling her arms. "No…"

He
rolled her over, pushed her face into the mattress, heaved her hips into the
air, and gathered her hands, putting them underneath her. "Don't
move."