Give Me a Reason (49 page)

“Behave, woman! It’s been hours since they left, and we both
need a shower,” Toni said, covering herself with the sheet.

“Is that an invitation?”

“Christ, you’re horny!”

“Me?” Laura asked innocently.

“You’re the one who dragged me up here.”

“I don’t remember you saying no.”

“I don’t remember you giving me a chance to. You practically
pounced on me.”

“You pounced back.”

Toni’s cheeks bested a cherub’s as her face lit up. “Yes, I
guess I did, didn’t I?”

“I’m thinking you’re not missing the fact that we aren’t
shopping today, are you?”

“No, but we need to go out tomorrow. I want to get your dad
something.”

“You don’t have to. I’m not.”

“You’re not?”

“Well, maybe a card.”

“Wow, that’s pretty harsh, don’t you think? I mean, you could
at least buy him a…a tie or something.”

“He doesn’t wear ties.”

“Okay, then how about a box of chocolates?” Toni asked.

“Why are you trying to get me to get him something? I’m sure
he doesn’t expect anything.”

“Then it would be a nice thing to do, wouldn’t it? Surprise
him. Show him you care.”

“And if I don’t?”

“You don’t mean that.”

“What makes you so sure?”

“Because I’ve seen the way you look at him when you think no
one’s watching. Like you’re trying to convince yourself that what you’re
feeling is wrong, when it’s not.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Darling, it’s okay to love him.”

“Maybe I don’t want to,” Laura said in a whisper.

“Maybe you just need a bit more time to get used to the
idea,” Toni said softly.

Pushing away her emotions, Laura quickly kissed Toni on the
cheek, and grabbing her robe, she climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom
to fill the tub. Appearing in the doorway a few minutes later, she said, “The
water’s hot. Care to join me?”

“Do I have to keep my hands to myself?” Toni asked, tossing
aside the sheets.

Laura did a slow slide with her eyes, and Toni’s nudity had
the desired effect. Deciding to turn the tables, Laura shrugged out of her
robe. Watching as Toni’s eyes drank her in, Laura said, “Absolutely...
not
.”

A few minutes later the bathroom was aglow with the soft
light of candles, and in a tub filled with steaming water, they sat together in
silence. With Laura resting against her chest, Toni closed her eyes and soaked
in the warmth of the water, listening to her partner’s steady breathing and
enjoying the feel of Laura lightly stroking her thigh.

Interrupting the quietude, Laura asked, “Have you ever made
love in a bathtub?”

Toni’s eyes flew open, and then ever so slowly a leer spread
across her face. “Where did that come from?”

“Just wondering.”

“Um...yes, I have. You?”

“Duane tried once, but it wasn’t really any good. Too much
water, I guess.”

“That’s because he didn’t know what he was doing. Give me
that soap,” Toni said, grabbing a sea sponge from the ledge.

“I wasn’t asking,” Laura said quietly, reaching for the
bottle of shower wash.

“Sure you were,” Toni said, filling the sponge with water.
Squeezing it lightly, she reached around with her other hand, and in front of
Laura’s eyes, poured an ample amount of soap into the pores of the soft sponge.

“That’s a lot of soap.”

“Shush,” Toni said as she squeezed the sponge a few times to
let it absorb the soap. “Now, just lie back and relax. This shan’t take long.”

“That’s a bit cocky,” Laura said through a smile as she
settled against Toni’s breasts.

Deciding not to argue the point, Toni ran the sponge over
Laura’s arms. Lowering her voice to a breathy whisper, she purred in Laura’s
ear, “You see, it’s not about penetration, darling. It’s about anticipation and
want. It’s about the feel of the soap on your skin and the smell of lavender and
honey in the air. It’s about...it’s about love and desire, heat and steam...”

Laura quickly found herself lost in the feel of Toni’s breath
on her neck, and the way the woman was gently washing her arms with the sponge
caused goose bumps to appear on her skin. Fighting to keep her eyes open, Laura
held her breath when Toni brought the sponge toward her chest, but instead of
allowing it to touch her skin, Toni squeezed it, and the foam fell in silence,
covering Laura’s breasts in a warm, soft coating of white.

“You doing okay?” Toni asked, noticing that Laura seemed to
have stopped breathing.

“Yes...I’m…I’m fine.”

Kissing Laura on the neck, Toni ran the sponge over her right
breast, and as Laura inhaled at the feel, Toni’s other hand snaked around and
covered the left. Smiling as Laura arched her body, Toni continued to wash with
one hand while she fondled with the other. Enjoying the fact that Laura’s
nipples were rock hard and as erect as she’d ever seen them, Toni continued her
seductive commentary. “Don’t get me wrong, darling. I love being inside you,
but when you’re in the water, it washes away all that lovely lubrication we
produce, so we have to draw upon other things to get you there.”

Dropping the sponge in the water, Toni cupped Laura’s breasts
in her hands, and after pinching the pointed tips once or twice, she breathed
deep before sliding one hand down Laura’s belly toward where they both wanted
it to be.

A sexy growl escaped Laura’s lips once Toni’s hand settled
between her legs, and resting her head on Toni’s shoulder, Laura closed her
eyes.

Painstakingly slowly, Toni ran her finger over Laura’s sex,
taking her time with each crevice while her other hand continued to torture
Laura’s nipple with every pinch. “Feel good?” she asked in a whisper.

“Don’t you stop...don’t you dare stop...”

“I have no intention of stopping, darling,” Toni said as she
began running her finger in circles around Laura’s clit. “But I have every
intention of making you come.”

Having slowed her attack on Laura’s left breast, when Laura
grabbed Toni’s hand and placed it there again, Toni grinned at the plea and
answered its demand. Returning to the swollen nipple, she rolled it between her
fingertips, pulling hard against the tip as Laura squirmed between her legs.

Toni’s caresses remained slow and casual under the water. The
bubbles in the tub were gradually fading away, and the water had begun to cool,
but Toni was resolute in her goal. She hadn’t once tried to enter Laura, but
her ministrations were having their effect, and when Laura’s breathing began to
come in gasps, and her squirms turned frenzied, Toni smiled and began to rub
her finger against Laura’s clit as fast as she could.

“Oh...oh...
yessss
...”

Feeling the body rush, Laura frantically grabbed hold of
Toni’s thighs. Arching her spine as the climax claimed her, water lapped over
the sides of the tub more than once as Laura bucked and quivered through the
spasms. Stilling her hand, Toni waited until Laura relaxed back into the water,
and picking up the sponge, Toni tenderly rinsed the remaining soap from Laura’s
body. “You still with me?” she asked in a whisper.

“‘Til death do us part.”

Chapter Forty-Seven

As he stood on the patio having a smoke, Bill turned his eyes
to the sky. Having listened to the weather forecasters the night before, the
morning was eerily calm for the weather they were predicting. Patches of blue
could still be seen, but in the distance, clouds were forming, and when a blast
of frigid air found its way through his jacket, Bill emptied his pipe and
stepped back inside the house.

Over breakfast they discussed their trip. Since Bill owned a
four-wheel drive vehicle and had driven the roads leading to his sister’s home
dozens of times, whatever the weather, he assured them it wouldn’t be an issue.
They all agreed to make the journey, so later that morning they climbed into
his Land Rover and headed north.

Although they had spent their formative years living in
Falkirk, when Bill’s sister had met and married Lawrence Shaw, she had moved to
an area just outside Kinlochleven to live in the house where her husband had
grown up. Large and spacious, but well off the beaten path, it was where Nancy
had raised her children, entertained her friends and on one summer day, it was
where she had been met at the door by a group of his friends to tell her
Lawrence was gone.

Since that time, whenever Bill visited he would listen as
she’d complain about the miles separating her from the children she loved so
much, but moving away from a home that held so many memories was impossible. So
instead, several times a year, she’d have a family gathering, insisting
everyone attend, and everyone did. You just didn’t say no to Nancy Shaw.

Less than an hour after they left Carron Bridge the snow
began to fall, and the farther they drove, the quieter they all became. Far
from shopping malls and urban sprawl, the road was nearly empty of vehicles,
and those that were traveling were doing it slowly.

Having not heard a sound in quite a while from the women
sitting in the back seat, Eleanor looked over her shoulder and noticed that
Toni’s eyes were closed. At first believing that the woman was asleep, her
opinion changed when she saw how Toni was holding the book in her lap.
White-knuckled, she had all but bent the paperback in half. Thinking for a
moment, Eleanor reached around and tapped Laura on the leg.

Looking away from the window, Laura’s eyes met her mother’s.
Following her gaze, when she saw the way Toni was grasping the book, Laura
leaned over and asked, “Toni...sweetheart, are you all right?”

She had been trying her best to quiet the panic rising from
within by putting to use the lessons Abby had taught her, but it wasn’t
working. The sound of the tires on the snow and the rocking motion of the
vehicle had taken Toni back in time to a journey she had made in the back of a
box van with tiny windows, metal seats and chains rattling against the steel.

Toni opened her mouth to speak and instantly lost the battle.
Feeling as if she was suffocating, she leaned back in her seat and began
gulping in air as fast as she could.

“Da...um...Bill, stop the car. Will you please?” Laura said,
rushing to unbuckle her seat belt.

“What?” he asked, looking in the rearview mirror.

“William, stop the car,” Eleanor implored, unfastening her
seat belt in hurry. “Toni’s having a problem.”

That was all he needed to hear, and quickly looking for a
safe place to stop, Bill pulled off the road into a small pile of snow. In an
instant, Toni opened her door and stumbled out. Managing to take only a few
steps before she fell to her knees, she tried to fill her lungs with air she
didn’t need. Seconds later, both Laura and Eleanor were at her side, doing
their best to quiet her anxieties.

“Sweetheart, it’s okay. I’m here. You’re safe. Just breathe.
Remember what Abby said, Toni. Just take slow, easy breaths. Remember...slow,
easy breaths.”

“Can I do anything?” Eleanor asked.

“Just talk to her, Mum. Just talk to her.”

Kneeling by Toni’s side, Eleanor rested her hand lightly on
Toni’s shoulder. “Toni, William and I are here. You’re safe. Remember, we’re
just going to Nancy’s house. No one’s going to hurt you there.”

Hearing the crunch of snow, both women looked up as Bill
approached. Walking around them, he knelt in front of the woman still gasping
for air. Holding out his hand, he said, “Toni, take my hand.”

“That’s not what she needs,” Laura said, glowering at the
man.

Tuning out his daughter’s words, Bill said firmly, “Toni,
take my hand, lass. You can do it.”

His voice was strong and clear, and Toni remembered the
afternoon when he had saved her from the fall off the ladder. His arms were
safe, and his words were true. He was Laura’s father, and he would protect her.
He promised.

Opening her eyes, Toni slowed her breathing and looked up at
him. Her embarrassment blazed across her face, but it was dismissed with a
subtle shake of his head, so after taking another ragged breath, Toni placed
her hand in his.

“That’s my girl,” he whispered.

Stunned, both Eleanor and Laura remained kneeling as they
watched him pull Toni to her feet, and without giving it a second thought, he
reached down and dusted the snow from her trousers. “Now, why don’t you sit up
front with me for a while? I spent a lot of years on the sea, and I’ve got lots
of tall tales to tell. How’d you like to hear them?”

Managing to give him a weak smile, Toni said, “I’d…I’d like
that if…if Eleanor doesn’t mind.”

“I wouldn’t mind at all,” Eleanor chimed in, getting to her
feet.

“Good. Well, I don’t know about you ladies, but I think it’s
colder than a witch’s tit out here. Shall we?” Bill said, grinning as he
offered Toni his arm.

Without saying a word, Toni allowed herself to be led to the
SUV, and climbing in the front seat, she had her seatbelt buckled before
Eleanor and Laura had a chance to take a step.

Open-mouthed, Laura rose to her feet. For so long she had
been the only one Toni had trusted, so the slightest hint of loss washed over
her as she watched Bill lead Toni to the Land Rover, and then just as quickly,
the feeling disappeared. Toni wasn’t her possession. She was the woman Laura
loved, and although she was baffled as to how Toni could so easily be calmed by
a man who Laura still considered a stranger, that was Laura’s issue, not
Toni’s.

Seeing the puzzled look on her daughter’s face, Eleanor asked,
“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just trying to make sense of what just happened,”
Laura said, brushing the snow off her jeans.

“Well, if I had to guess, I’d say that Toni has discovered
something about your father that you’ve yet to realize.”

“Oh yeah? What’s that?”

“Even with all the mistakes he’s made, he’s still a good
man.”

***

For the next hour, Bill rambled on about his tales of the sea
while Laura and Eleanor sat quietly in the back seat occasionally laughing and
rolling their eyes at his exaggerations. Everyone else in the car had noticed
the amount of snow falling, but listening intently to Bill’s stories, Toni’s
head had remained bowed. Looking up to release the tension in her neck, her
eyes bulged when she saw drifts of whiteness covering the landscape. “When did
it start to snow like this?”

Bill looked up and caught sight of Eleanor in the rearview
mirror, and when he saw her appreciative nod, he replied with a wink. Glancing
to his left, he said, “It started about an hour ago, Toni, but no worries, the
house is just down this road.”

Peering through the glass, Toni said, “I don’t see a thing.”

“That’s because there isn’t anything to see. Just a lot of
hills, meadows, trees...and snow.”

With the closest town over ten miles away, the dirt road on which
they were traveling had never seen a snow plow. Keeping the tires in the tracks
made by others, Bill slipped the Land Rover into the lowest gear and carefully
maneuvered down the winding path. Fifteen minutes later, he pulled up to a
Victorian villa outlined in Christmas lights.

Covered in sandstone, the house was impressive and stately.
Four oversized windows on the second floor matched the four dormers that ran
along the slate-covered roof, and wreaths, dusted with snow, hung over the
glass. The lower floor held two windows, identical in size and decoration to
those above and centered between them was an understated wooden door set back
into the stone of the house.

Knowing that when they returned on Christmas Day, the back of
Bill’s SUV would be filled with casseroles, biscuits and snacks, they had
brought along all the gifts purchased for the children. After filling their
hands with bags, they trudged up the stone steps leading to the house, and
stomping their feet to rid themselves of snow, they rang the bell.

Opening the door, a blast of icy wind caused Nancy to shiver,
and stepping back into her home, she waved her arm for her guests to enter.
“Oh, my, it’s absolutely bitter! Get in here right now.”

Single file, they walked into the warmth of the house and
breathed in the aroma of bread, baked fresh that morning. As they rid
themselves of their coats, Toni looked around the spacious entryway. Large
enough to encompass a hallway leading to the back of the house, as well as an
expansive stairway leading the way to the upper floors, it was, nonetheless,
simple and homey, not at all like Toni had imagined it would be.

“Thank you all for coming,” Nancy said as she took their
coats and hung them in the cloak room. “I hope the trip wasn’t too awful.”

“It’s a bloody blizzard,” Bill groused, handing her his coat.

“Oh, it is not, Billy. I swear you’ve gotten soft in your old
age.”

“Sort of like your head?” he asked.

Laughing, she slapped him on the arm and then turned to face
her other three guests. Seeing Toni standing off to the side, Nancy went over
and gave her an all-encompassing hug. “I want to apologize for my words the
other day, Toni. I was wrong, and well…well, I was shocked. Please forgive me.
I meant no harm.”

Feeling as if she was being embraced by a giant marshmallow
with carrot-colored hair, Toni couldn’t help but grin. Returning the hug, she
said, “Of course. No harm done, Nancy.”

“Good,” she said, holding Toni at arm’s length. “Now, Laura
why don’t you give Toni a tour of the house, and your parents and I will catch
up, and feel free to put those pressies under the tree.”

Nancy flounced down the long hallway leading to the kitchen
with her hips swaying left and right like a ship at sea. Rolling their eyes in
unison at the woman’s animated swagger, Eleanor and Bill followed.

Waiting until the others were out of hearing range, Toni
leaned down and whispered, “I never thought I’d be afraid of breasts, but I
swear I thought I was going to be squished.”

“I told you they were big,” Laura said with a snigger.

“So,” Toni began, looking around the entry. “Which way is the
tree?”

“There are probably at least three. Which one would you like
to see first?”

“Three?”

“Come on, I’ll show you,” Laura said, taking Toni’s hand.

The entryway was subdued, lacking both color and elaborate
decoration, but it didn’t take long for Toni to realize that the rest of the
house erupted in both.

The first room they came upon was a small sitting area just
past the cloak room, and when Toni peered inside, her mouth dropped open. Red
and blue tartan wallpaper covered the walls, and although ending a few feet
before it reached the ceiling, the swath of white plaster remaining did little
to mute the color explosion. Scarlet drapes reached to the oak-planked floor,
the majority of which was covered in a vibrant paisley area rug that swirled
with hues of blue, green, purple and red. A shiny black upright piano sat along
one wall while a diminutive cherry desk stood in the corner of another, and in
the center of the room, opposite a small fireplace, were two wingback chairs,
the color of their upholstery matching that of a martini olive. Curling her lip
at the decorating disaster, Toni was thankful the room was too small to hold a
Christmas tree.

Walking down the hall past the stairs, Laura opened the door
to the first of several bathrooms in the house, and Toni quickly began to see a
pattern. The floor was tiled in maroon, blue, and gray, similar to the tartan
wallpaper she had viewed moments before, and the walls were covered in shiny apple-red
tile, grouted in white. The fixtures matched the grout in color, and if it
hadn’t been for the bright pink towels hanging from the rods, the room was
doable…at least for a short visit.

As they approached the kitchen, on the wall opposite the bathroom
was a set of pocket doors and sliding them into the wall, Laura stepped back
and motioned for Toni to enter. As she took a hesitant step, Toni smelled the
scent of pine, and smiling, she walked into Nancy Shaw’s library. The color
scheme wasn’t something Toni would have chosen, but the small Norfolk pine just
inside the doorway eased the pain in her eyes...slightly.

The room was painted a bright turquoise, but the bulky wood
moldings surrounding the ceiling, floor and doors were glossy white, and the effect
made the room appear as if it had jumped off a page of a comic book. To the far
left was a small stone fireplace flanked by two red leather chairs, and a sofa
in the same material and shade sat against the wall opposite the doorway. At
first confused by the lack of furniture in the rather spacious room, when Toni
noticed that the bottom shelves of the walnut bookcases were filled with games,
dolls and toys, she realized the library had been converted into a playroom.
Glancing at the tree, her assumption was confirmed. Every branch was filled
with handmade ornaments made of pipe cleaners, felt-covered Styrofoam balls and
colored paper.

After placing the children’s gifts under the tree, Laura and
Toni headed back to the front of the house, but came to a stop when the front
door opened. Toni smiled immediately when she saw a familiar face, but when a
man, tall and broad-shouldered, followed Peggy inside, Toni’s expression turned
solemn. Grabbing Laura’s hand, she remained mute as Laura led her to the people
standing just inside the door.