Frozen Hearts (16 page)

"Fuck, you came. I choked and you dove under the blankets. I answered the door with fucking cum in my hair. Arielle thought it was hair product and tried to rub it in to my head."

"Did you ever tell her?" Tyce asked.

"Hell no," I shouted. "I will go to my grave with that secret."

He kissed my nose and settled next to me. "You need rest. We graduate in five days and I don't want to have to wheel you up to the stage."

For the next few days, Tyce and my mother smothered me. I almost wanted to check back into the hospital to get away from them. Tyce's mom stopped over for lunch the second afternoon and added to the doting. I have to admit it was nice watching Tyce and my mother sort things out. I guess after I got shipped away, my mother and Tyce had a loud argument in the grocery store. Tyce had been mortified by the incident.

My father stayed away. It was odd, but with my father away, my mother blossomed. She was happy. I don't think I'd ever seen her so relaxed.

"You have a nice smile," I said when I came into kitchen. She was humming.

She shook her head and gestured for me to sit. "We should talk about this."

"Why?"

She frowned and handed me a muffin and cup of coffee. "I need to apologize to you."

"Mom, I'm sick of all the apologies. Saying sorry doesn't change what happened. I like how things are right now."

"But your father…"

"Isn't here," I said. "I can't worry about what other people think anymore. It's not worth it. Most of them aren't going to change and I'm not going to change either."

"I changed," she murmured.

I nodded and sipped my coffee. She touched my hand and I moved my chair closer to hers, nestling against her side. She put her arm around me and stroked my hair, muttering more apologies into my hair. I leaned into her, feeling her tears soak into my shirt.

Regret was a hard bird to have sitting on your shoulder all the time. I told her to let it go. Nothing either of us did could change the past. I'm not sure how long we sat like that, but finally my arm fell asleep and I shifted away from her.

"Mom, will you tell Tyce I went to the rink?"

Her eyes widened. "Are you sure you're ready to skate?"

"I need to sort some things out," I said.

"You're a grown man. I can't stop you," she said. She smiled and patted me on the cheek. "You're a good man, Erik. Don't ever forget that. Whatever you choose to do, I will support you."

A giant lump was filling up my throat and I had to swallow several times before I could speak again. "Thanks, Mom," I whispered.

"Don't push it too hard," she said. "And don't be too late; you graduate tomorrow."

The rink was quiet but I knew Karl was somewhere in the building because several lights were on and the rink was newly surfaced. There was nothing like fresh, untouched ice. I laced up my skates as quickly as I could. I was still pretty slow, but the excitement to get back on the ice spurred me forward.

Feeling the ice beneath my feet, released a lot of the tension from the past few weeks. When I thought I was dying, I thought about the ice. It had given me so much.

"Hey," Tyce said from across the ice. "Can I join you?"

I skated over to him and sprayed him with snow.

"Always," I said.

"You look great," he said as he stepped to the ice, skating circles around me.

"I feel good," I said. He nudged me and we skated, never moving very far away from each other.

"Can I ask you something," Tyce asked. He was biting his lip, so I knew it was going to be a serious question.

"You can ask me anything," I said.

He took a deep breath. "Can you truly be happy without hockey, Erik?" Tyce asked.

I thought I knew the answer to that question, but after everything that happened, I wasn't so sure anymore. I answered him honestly and told him I needed to sort out a lot of things. The only thing I was certain about was that whatever decision I made, I wanted him to be with me. I wasn't going to do anything without him.

"You mean that," he said. I stopped and touched his cheek.

"I'm never leaving your side again," I said. "Bad thing happen when we're apart."

He smiled and pushed me against the boards. He touched his lips against mine, muttering, "Don't ever forget. Always have, always will."

We stayed on the ice for another hour before he finally dragged me home. It was good to be back at the apartment. My mom had been great, but I needed some space to breathe—although Tyce was filling the void of my mom rather nicely. He lectured me about overdoing things as I stiffly tried to undress. Watching him fuss over me made my insides turn to mush. I'd become a total sap. He kissed me on the forehead and sat down on the bed.

"The cops arrested Rochelle's brothers and those other guys," Tyce said.

"I know. Unless they all plead guilty, I'm going to have to testify," I said.

"I'll be with you," he said and crawled under the blankets, pulling me into a hug.

I think the worst part of that whole thing was what Cookie did to me. The beat down I took from Rochelle's brothers and their friends had been awful and almost killed me, but a part of me did die when a man I considered my friend walked away from me because of whom I loved. It was hard to come to terms with that part of the incident. Two days before Marshy and Dix went and had a conversation with Cookie. I didn't ask any questions. It was probably safer that I didn't know what they did to him. To an extent, I could understand Rochelle's brothers' motives, but Cookie didn't have an excuse. Tyce told me to forget it and move forward. No matter what you did, there was always going to be assholes in the world.

I snuggled into the warmth of his body and drifted away.

The morning came much too early when I felt someone with a lot of stubble kiss my cheek then burst out laughing.

"Marshy," I mumbled. "Get the fuck out of here."

"Such language for the college graduate," Marshy said. "You're mom called. Told me to make sure you two lovebirds were up and moving around."

"Fine," I said. "I'm moving."

I stuck my hand up and flipped Marshy off.

Tyce groaned.

"Don't make me come and drag your butts out of bed."

Tyce sat up. "I'm up," he grumbled and crawled over me. He glared at Marshy and stomped to the bathroom.

"Jeesh, I was just following directions. His mom called too."

Tyce stumbled out of the bathroom looking disheveled and out of sorts. "I have to go to my apartment and get dressed."

"We need to move in together," I said. Tyce's head snapped up and he didn't look sleepy anymore.

"I'd like that," he said. "Although, we may have to bring Sam along."

I smiled. "I can deal with Sam."

"Well, all right then," Tyce said. I climbed out of bed and moved toward Tyce, but he held up his hands and stopped me before I could make body contact. "Don't start something we can't finish. I really do have to go, but hold that thought and I'll ravish you later."

All I got was a quick peck on the check and he was gone. I cleaned up and got dressed.

"Arielle," I shouted. "Quit mackin' on Marshy and give me a hand."

I heard giggling and some sort of loud thumping then she was standing in my room grinning at me.

"You guys sort of make me want to puke," I said. "I think I liked it better when I didn't know you guys were a thing."

"We are more than a thing," Arielle said, waving her hand in front of my face where a giant diamond ring now glittered.

"Oh fuck," I moaned dramatically. "Marshy is going to be part of my family."

Arielle thunked me on the head. "What do you need?" Arielle asked.

"Just fucking help me with my hair. It still hurts like hell to lift my arms up."

Arielle rolled her eyes and grabbed the comb out of my hand. She squeezed some gel into her hand and smeared it in my hair. "Remember when we were little and I curled your hair."

"How could I forget? Dad yelled at me for acting like a girl and grounded me for a week. I was fucking ten years old."

"Tyce thought it was hysterical."

"You made a very pretty girl," my mom said from the doorway.

"I'm not a girl," I grumbled.

"Not saying you are, dear," my mom said, ruffling my hair, which earned her a loud scolding from Arielle.

"What are you doing here?" Arielle asked.

"I wanted to give something to Erik before graduation."

She smiled and opened her purse, pulling out a small wrapped package.

"What is it," I asked, examining the package.

"Oh, for crying out loud," Arielle said. She huffed and grabbed the package out of my hands, ripping open the paper. We both stared at the framed photo of two young boys, lips touching, lost in each other, totally oblivious to the camera.

"Mom," I said softly.

"It's lovely isn't it," she said. "I am sorry. Your father accidently stumbled across the picture. He went insane and nothing I said could get him to settle down. He was so worried about your career. He was a fool and I was worse because I followed along with everything he told me to do."

"Mom," I interrupted. "Enough. We all did things we regret and I'm tired of dwelling on the past. I would like to enjoy my present at the moment."

Graduation was long and hot and everything it was supposed to be. It was silly but I was nervous to walk across that stupid stage and get my diploma, but it turned out okay. I did hear a smattering of boos from the students and audience, but the applause was louder and quickly drowned them out. My heart swelled when I looked into the audience and saw my mother standing and clapping, wiping her eyes and grinning. She was standing next to Tyce's mom. Arielle told me Dad had shown up, trying to hide in the corner. My mother had nodded at him. I wasn't sure how I felt about that situation.

After a wonderful dinner that involved Arielle shoving her hand in everyone's face, Tyce and I snuck out for a quick skate. I told Dix and Marshy they could come later. They were not happy, but I needed a few moments of quiet with Tyce and the ice.

Tyce let me skate alone for a few laps until I grinned and signaled him to come on the ice. He grabbed our sticks and tossed out a puck. We turned into sixteen-year-old boys again and goofed around for almost an hour.

Tyce finally knocked me to the ice and ended up sprawled across my chest. "I think this is where we started," he said.

"Fuck," I said, shaking the glove off my hand and touching his cheek. "So it seems."

"Always have. Always will," we both whispered.

"I thought I better check on you guys," Arielle shouted from the edge of the rink. Tyce jumped up and threw his glove at her. "There's some people who want to speak to you guys."

Tyce offered me a hand and pulled me to my feet. We skated over to the boards and watched as the door opened and several people walked inside, followed by cameras and more people.

"What the hell is going on?" Tyce asked.

"No clue?" I answered.

"Wait," Tyce said. "I recognize…"

"Hello Mr Fox, I was wondering if I could have word with you?"

My eyes widened with recognition. Tyce poked me in the side and Arielle nodded.

"I'm Mr…"

"I know who you are," I interrupted him. He offered his hand and I grasped it firmly. He shook Tyce's hand too.

"We'd like to talk with you about playing hockey for us."

Arielle's phone beeped. "Excuse me," she said.

She talked for a few seconds then handed me her phone. I listened to the man on the other end. "I have another offer."

"We'd also like to invite you to the summer workout," he said to Tyce.

"Could you excuse us for a second," I said and grabbed Tyce by the jersey. We skated to center ice, so no one could hear us. I frowned. I didn't know how I felt about any of this shit.

"Erik, before you say anything, I'm going to ask you the question I asked you before, but you hadn't found an answer. Can you be happy without hockey? I think you're blaming the game for everything that went wrong in your life, but it never was the game. The game brought you back to me."

"I know it's not the game," I said. "I'd like to hear what they have to offer."

"I think that's a great idea," Tyce said.

We skated back to the small crowd.

"Well, this is turning out to be quite the day. Anybody interested in talking about hockey, please direct all your inquiries to my agent, Arielle Fox. She also represents Tyce Andrews so any questions you have for him can be directed to her too. I'll hand everything over to her."

Arielle flipped her hair and strode right into the middle of the crowd. Tyce and I headed out the Zamboni entrance to Karl's office. We took off our skates and scribbled a quick note, telling Karl we'd be back to pick up our skates after all the excitement died down. We snuck out the back door in our stocking feet and ran right into my mother.

"Mom, sorry," I said. "What are you doing here?"

"Arielle let me in on her secret. We came to support you," my mom said. She reached out and stroked my cheek, smiling.

"We?" I said.

"Your father is pouting in the car, but he'll get over it," his mother said, pointing at her car. I could barely make out the top of my father's head in the passenger seat.

Tyce slid his hand down my back. Being near my father still made me antsy, but Tyce's warm touch calmed me. "Give it a chance," Tyce whispered. "I gave you a few chances and look where we are today."

"I should have done this a long time ago," my mother said as she embraced Tyce and me. I never knew my mom could give such good hugs. "Thank you," she whispered to Tyce. He smiled and hugged her back.

"It's was my pleasure," Tyce said.

And mine too.