Frozen Hearts (11 page)

I chewed on my tongue and I resisted the urge to jump over the boards and grind the guy's face into the ice.

"Erik," Tyce said. He placed his hand on my arm. It was only then that I realized the tension in my body. "You need to relax."

"I need to skate. It will help."

The ice was filling up quickly. There were more than a few guys here and I wondered if a lot of them came out to gawk at Tyce and me. I didn't give a shit why they were here. If they fucked with me, I was going to make them wish they'd never picked up a hockey stick.

Dix skated over to the boards. "Fuck, can you believe this? I didn't think anyone was coming to play. It's like half the town is here."

I shrugged and slapped my helmet on my head.

"You up for this?" I asked Tyce. "I know your ribs are sore."

"I'm fine," Tyce said. "My ribs are no worse than your face."

I caught sight of Arielle and Sam sitting up in the stands surrounded by several other people I didn't recognize. Why the hell were there so many people in the stands for a silly pick-up hockey game? This was nuts. They couldn't only be here to watch Tyce and me, could they?

After an initial loud argument, Dix and some other guy were made captains. Teams were quickly chosen. Not many guys knew about Tyce's hockey skills, but Dix did, and he made sure Tyce and I stayed together. He picked me first and Tyce second. A wave of mumbling went through the players. Most were whispering stupid stuff about keeping the boyfriends together. I glanced at Tyce, but he was staring at the ice, so I left it alone. I was here to play hockey and hit something or someone. They could all fuck-off.

Tyce was a step slower with his injured ribs, but it didn't matter. We lit up the other team and by the time we were finished, we'd shut down most of the gossip. Now they were all talking about Tyce.

Dix clapped me on the back when we got off the ice. It was a signal he used to tell me I was forgiven for interrupting his evening. He offered up a small smile before he flipped me off and trudged over to talk with some girl who had been sitting in the stands making eyes at him. She helped him with his equipment and I figured it was good sign that he was going to get something tonight.

I sat down next to Tyce to take my skates off. He groaned when he bent forward to unlace his skates.

"Let me," I said, dropping to my knees. The moment I touched his skate, it felt like the entire arena went quiet and was watching us. I was pretty sure I heard the click of hundreds of phones taking pictures again, but I couldn't find it in me to give a shit. The whole fucking world would know about Tyce and me by tomorrow anyway. This was nothing. The people at the restaurant got a kiss. This was just unlacing his skates.

With help from Sam and Arielle, we got our shit together as fast as possible. I think we all wanted to get the hell out of the arena and away from all the prying eyes. I muttered a quick thank you to both of them.

"I'll see you later?" Tyce said to Sam.

"Don't bother," Sam said. "Arielle and I are going out dancing. I don't plan on coming home tonight—even if I have to take her home."

"Hey," Arielle said and punched Sam in the arm. "As if."

"What? A man has needs and I'm on the brink," Sam said. He rubbed his arm and scowled at Arielle. "Besides it's your stupid brother's fault I'm in this state, so it's only right that a close relative help me out."

"You do know I'm dating a professional hockey player," Arielle said.

"Even better," Sam's face lit up and he waggled his eyebrows. "Which one?"

Arielle giggled and launched into a description of Marshy. I'd purposely never looked at him close enough to notice how broad his shoulders were or the cute little dimple that showed up when he smiled. I definitely didn't need to hear Arielle's description of his ass.

"Can we get out of here?" I asked Tyce.

"Um, yes, that would be a good idea," Tyce mumbled.

Unbidden thoughts of Marshy, Sam, and Arielle snuck into my brain. "Shit, I could have gone my whole life without hearing any of that," I said and pushed Tyce toward the car. "Later you two."

We left them whispering about dicks and how size really does matter. Christ.

I was trying to wash Arielle and Sam's conversation out of my brain when Tyce bumped against me. Two guys were leaning against Tyce's car. For a moment I thought about turning around, but Tyce kept walking forward, gripping his hockey stick tightly.

"I'm not running, Erik," Tyce growled.

He ignored the guys and opened his trunk, tossing his equipment in, but he held on to his stick, wielding it like a bat.

"Ah, the cute little fairy needs to fight with a stick," one of the guys said.

Tyce pursed his lips and tossed his stick in the trunk. He moved lightning fast for a guy with sore ribs. The guy who called him a fairy got a quick punch to the jaw. He dropped to the pavement so fast I barely had time to step aside so his face didn't land on my shoes. The other guy backed away with his hands in front of his face, but Tyce wasn't going to let the idiot off. He grabbed the guy by his jacket collar and shoved him against his car.

"Don't forget to tell everyone that a fucking fairy did this to you, jackass," Tyce said. He threw a fake punch then shoved the guy to the ground. Both guys scrambled to their feet and ran away. As far as I was concerned, Tyce let them off easy.

"Let's go home," he snapped.

Tyce didn't say anything more on the short ride back to my apartment. He parked but didn't make a move to get out of the car. I wanted him to stay the night. I reached over and touched his thigh.

"Tyce," I said softly.

"Erik, don't, okay," he said. "This is going to happen from time to time. We just deal with it."

"But …"

"Erik," he warned. "Shut the fuck up."

I opened my mouth to say something else but was stopped when he laid a gentle kiss on my lips.

"Stay," I whispered against his lips.

Tyce turned his big blue eyes on me and before I knew what was happening, everything from the evening was crashing down on my head. The weight was so heavy, I didn't know if I'd be able to get out of the car without assistance from a crane. Tyce noticed the change in my demeanor immediately.

"Let's go inside," he said.

"My mother called me trash," I said.

"Erik," Tyce said quietly.

I squeezed my eyes shut. I was not going to cry. My dad would always be a major prick, but the idea that my mother had called me trash hurt me more than I was willing to admit. I'd always known she sided with my dad, but deep down I hoped she still loved me. Apparently I was wrong.

Tyce stuck close to me as we walked into apartment. Someone shouted something but Tyce kept moving me forward until we were safely in my apartment with the door closed tightly behind us.

"Shower," he said, steering me down the hall. I let him maneuver me into the bathroom. He sat me down on the toilet and bent down to remove my shoes and socks.

"Erik," he said, leaning forward and touching my cheek. "Always have, always will."

With that small phrase I shattered, leaning into his touch as tears slid down my cheeks. I'd never cried in front of another person since I was a little kid and even then it had been Tyce. We'd been climbing this giant tree in his yard and I'd lost my footing and slipped. The fall knocked the wind out of me and I couldn't stop the tears that had welled up in my eyes. Tyce had rubbed circles on my back until I'd stopped crying. He knew my dad would pitch a fit if he noticed my tear-stained face, so we'd gone into his house where his mother patched me up and cleaned my face. She never said a word, only smiled and asked if we wanted cookies. My dad would have called me a big baby and told me that men didn't cry. I was nine years old.

As the years passed, I prided myself in my ability to keep my feelings buried somewhere deep inside. It probably wasn't the healthiest thing to do, but I suppose hitting people on the ice helped defuse my emotions. But this was a lot for anyone to handle. I always knew my dad thought of me as a commodity, but I'd always kept a small spark of hope my mother thought more of me.

Tyce helped me undress and turned the shower on, checking the temperature before he gave me an encouraging push. He started to close the curtain but I grabbed his hand, holding tightly.

"Don't leave," I begged. He still had his sweats and shirt on, but he stepped under the water and took me in his arms. I felt like a fucking big crybaby, but at the moment I needed to feel him. He rubbed circles on my back like that day under the tree and it made the tears come harder. I seemed to be opening up everything today. Not only had I stepped out of the closet, I let my feelings go in front of Tyce, which might have been harder than kissing him in public.

"I'm here, Erik," Tyce mumbled against my wet skin. His lips burned against my shoulder and I ducked my head and licked his mouth. A low groan rumbled in his throat and suddenly my dick was awake and I needed desperately to feel something good. My fingers clutched at his sweatpants and I tried to rip them down, but Tyce covered my hand with his and stilled my movements.

"Tyce, please," I begged.

"No, I don't want it fast and furious tonight," he said. "I need to take it slow. I need to look at your face and feel you."

His fingers carded through my wet hair, holding me in place as he stared into my eyes. All I could do was nod.

"You finish up first, I'll just get out of these wet clothes," Tyce said.

I went through the motions of showering, signaling when I was done, so Tyce could do the same. I was a mess of exposed nerves, all jittery and literally bouncing off the walls when Tyce came in the bedroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. It was only a few days ago that I had stumbled across him in my bedroom wearing only a towel and dripping all over my floor. It was a sight I was sure I would never tire of, except I didn't like the bruises that colored his torso. It was a harsh reminder of all the things that had happened today. He said he didn't blame me, but how could he not. The only reason he had those bruises was because of me. I sighed and looked away.

"Erik, we are not having this discussion again," Tyce said. There was the proof that the little shit could still read my mind.

I sat on my bed and hung my head. "Kind of hard not to think about it, when the evidence is staring me in the face."

"I've had worse," Tyce said. He touched one of the bruises and shrugged.

"Worse?" I squeaked. It was hard to imagine someone beating the shit out of Tyce.

"Don't ask me any questions right now. One day I'll tell you, but now I just want to be close to you. Let me show you this time," he whispered. My breathing stuttered because Tyce was asking permission to fuck me. How was I going to tell him I'd only bottomed once and it wasn't exactly a pleasant experience.

"You can say no, Erik," he said. He touched my hand and I noticed we were both shaking. "Forget I said anything. Let's just take it slow and see where we end up tonight."

"No, I mean, yes," I said. "Show me, Tyce."

He started to say something and I knew he was going to tell me we didn't have to go that far tonight. I silenced him by pulling his face down to mine and planting a kiss on his mouth. He sighed and parted his lips, letting his tongue slide out against mine.

I slid my hand down his back until I found the towel. I tugged gently and the towel fell to his feet.

"Erik," Tyce said.

"I'm okay, Tyce, please," I said softly. I really did need to feel something good tonight. He pushed me back on the bed and crawled on top of me. The weight of his body, his mouth on my skin and his hands on my face comforted and calmed me.

"Always have, always will," Tyce said. I doubted I would ever tire of those words. He could say them for the rest of my life and they would always make my stomach swoop and my flesh heat. I needed him more than I wanted to admit, and it scared the shit out of me.

He kissed my neck, licking at my collarbone and settling at my nipples. He nipped and licked at them both until I was panting and arching my hips into the air, searching for any sort of friction.

"Patience, Erik," Tyce mumbled as he kissed a line down my chest to my bellybutton where he swirled his tongue and made me giggle like a girl.

"Still ticklish," he muttered and dipped his tongue again.

"Stop it, please, touch me," I pleaded. I tried to grab my dick but Tyce slapped my hand away and I muttered a string a curse words that made him laugh. Without warning he ran his lips up the underside of my dick.

"Holy fuck," I shouted, lifting my hips off the bed. Tyce climbed on top of me, trapping me beneath him.

"You feel so good, taste so good, Erik. I want you so bad. Can I have you?"

"Yes, anything," I growled.

He crawled back down and guided my dick into his mouth, letting one hand drop to my balls, playing with them until I felt his fingers slip back to my hole. I shifted uncomfortably waiting for him to penetrate me. Instead he let his fingers drift over my hole, barely applying any pressure. He did again, each time pressing a bit harder until I wanted him to shove his fingers inside me.

"I need lube, baby," he mumbled with a mouth full of dick. I gestured to the small table by my bed. He let my dick fall from his lips and rolled away. I whimpered. Seconds later he was back with slicked fingers, tracing small circles around my hole. I pushed against him.

"I'm going to go slow," he said, kissing my dick. "If you want me to stop, just let me know."

"If you don't hurry up. I may die," I whispered. "I need to fucking come."

I tried to grab at my dick again but Tyce slapped my hand away. I gave him a stern look and spread my legs farther apart.

"God, you're so beautiful spread out for me."

I blushed like a fucking schoolgirl and tried to bury my face in my pillow.

Tyce grinned at me and licked my dick again but this time I felt him press harder on my hole and breach me with one finger. It felt strange and I wanted to push out, but I forced myself to relax. He took my dick into his mouth again and that made me forget about the intrusion in my ass. I lost track of everything except his mouth until I felt him add another finger and suddenly everything felt more pleasurable. He found my prostate and when he shoved a third finger inside me, I wanted more. This was so much better than when I'd let that jackass fuck me in a hotel. It had been all for his pleasure, but Tyce was making this for both of us.