Forgotten: a truly gripping psychological thriller (18 page)

‘Looks like he’s having a good time,’ Ellen observed. ‘Found himself a playmate.’

Kai shook her head. ‘I don’t think so. He didn’t really strike me as that type. He seems sensitive and gentle. I don’t think he would pay a woman for sex.’ Even as she spoke she could hear how naive her words sounded. She couldn’t hide her disappointment, and a thrill of anger from the feeling of being cheated.

‘Honey, they’re all that type,’ Ellen announced in a mock southern drawl. ‘How long have you known him?’

‘A few days. He came into the hospital to see me – then, yesterday, he took me out for a couple of hours. But he seemed so nice and he’s been so kind to me. Surely he can’t have been putting it all on. It didn’t seem like a front.’

‘Go talk to him. Maybe she’s a friend, maybe she’s not Thai: she might be impostor like me.’

Kai considered this suggestion. How would he respond? If she confronted him and he was pissed off he might not visit anymore and Kai felt like she needed all the friends she could get. But friends like that? She continued to watch him, pulling back into the booth like a startled tortoise retreating into its shell when she thought he was turning her way, then tentatively peering out again. She could feel Ellen smiling at her behaviour.

‘What?’ she demanded.

Ellen shook her head. ‘Go talk to him. If this matters so much to you at least put your mind at rest one way or the other. Just stop playing at Harriet the Spy.’

‘Okay,’ Kai breathed. ‘I’ll go.’

She stood unsteadily, unsure if her dizziness was the beer or her confusion, and crossed slowly to the bar, willing Mark to turn and see her before she had to force her presence on him. Instead he turned away to say something to his companion, forcing Kai to tap him on the shoulder.

‘Hi, we meet again.’

Mark turned, frowning, and for a second he looked like he had no idea who she was until his eyes lit up with a brilliant smile.

‘Kai, what the hell are you doing here? Have you been let out for good behaviour?’

He seemed genuinely pleased to see her, squeezing her shoulder gently as he studied her face, his eyes flicking backwards and forwards, taking in every detail. There was no sense of embarrassment or secrecy about him: he turned to his friend and immediately introduced the two women.

‘Kai, this is Phet, Phet, Kai.’ He looked pleased with himself for completing this most basic of social niceties and folded his arms as though waiting for the two women to speak.

‘Hi,’ Kai dutifully responded, forcing herself to meet Phet’s catlike green eyes.

Phet grinned in response, ‘Hello Kai. Mark has told me about you. You have been in the hospital. How are you?’

Kai fought down a flicker of resentment as she imagined Mark discussing her problems with this rather striking woman. Phet’s English was accented but clear, not what Kai had been expecting. How did a prostitute come to learn fluent English? Mark stepped in to clarify.

‘Phet’s from Bangkok. We taught in the same school. When I said I was heading north she decided to come with me. Her family are from round here so she’s visiting relatives.’

Phet smiled in confirmation.

‘Oh,’ Kai responded banally, feeling oddly deflated. There was an explanation.

‘Anyway,’ Mark interrupted her thoughts, ‘what are you doing here? I thought you couldn’t be trusted on your own.’

Kai gestured to where Ellen was studying them with intense interest. ‘Found a friend,’ she said, unwilling to let him know that Ellen was a therapist. She didn’t want Mark to think she was crazy enough to need a shrink, didn’t want to frighten him off so soon.

‘Another patient?’ Mark asked.

‘Something like that,’ she lied. ‘I’d better get back to her. Do you want to join us?’

‘Okay,’ Mark smiled. Kai noticed he didn’t even bother to consult Phet as he strode across the room with the two women following in his wake. Ellen moved down the bench as he approached, allowing room for the four of them round the small table.

‘Hi,’ he said, sitting next to the doctor. ‘I’m Mark.’

‘You’re the knight in shining armour,’ Ellen grinned. ‘The one who rescues damsels in distress.’ Mark’s smile wavered a little as though he was uncertain whether this was a compliment or an accusation.

‘Hey, it’s okay,’ Ellen reassured him, placing a hand on his arm. ‘I think it’s great that you want to help her.’

Kai, sitting opposite Mark, could sense his unease. He clearly didn’t know what to make of Ellen. Perhaps he’d been expecting a meek Thai woman and was thrown by this forthright American. Perhaps he just wasn’t used to women touching him.

‘Mark’s been a real help,’ Kai said in his defence. ‘I don’t know what I would have done if I’d been stuck in that place much longer with no hope of escape. It was such a relief to get out.’

Mark shrugged modestly. ‘What can I say? I must have been a tour guide in a previous life. Maybe we can do it again sometime soon?’

‘I’d like that.’

‘Better clear it with your doctor first,’ Ellen teased. ‘You know how Ekachai likes his rules and order.’

‘You know Doctor Ekachai?’ Mark asked.

‘A little.’

‘Is he your doctor?’

Kai cringed inwardly. She didn’t want Ellen to admit to her real role at the hospital, or the true nature of their relationship. She just wanted Ellen to be a friend, at least for tonight.

‘Not really,’ Ellen responded. ‘I’ve seen him around a lot though. Anyway, enough hospital talk. How long are you in Chiang Mai for, Mark?’

‘It’s all quite open-ended at the moment. I was intending to do some trekking, maybe some rafting as well. I don’t have to be back in Bangkok for a few weeks yet.’

‘Time for more tour guiding then?’

‘Who knows?’

‘How about you?’ Ellen suddenly asked Phet. ‘Are you here for long?’

Phet glanced at Mark as though looking for a cue before responding.

‘For only two weeks. I have to have some time with my family before I return to Bangkok. It is good to be away from the big city. While I am here I wish to visit the countryside, I like the fresh air.’ Another glance at Mark who took a long pull on his drink and smiled at Phet.

‘Bangkok’s too hot at this time of year. The traffic fumes just linger at street level and you can’t breathe. It’s a bit cooler up here, especially in the evenings. I like to be able to sit outside and eat without being smothered by diesel fumes.’

‘Can I get you another drink?’ Ellen asked standing up.

Mark shook his head and drained his beer, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he threw his head back.

‘Sorry, no, places to be, people to see, that sort of thing.’

‘Me also,’ announced Phet, placing her half-finished beer on the bar. ‘Nice to meet both of you.’

Kai watched as they weaved their way through the tables to the exit, losing them in the light of the doorway, before she turned back to Ellen.

‘See, I told you he was all right. She’s just a colleague.’

Ellen smiled knowingly. ‘You sound relieved.’

‘I just didn’t want him to be sleazy. He seemed so nice – I didn’t want to find out that it was all an act.’

Somehow, she wasn’t convincing herself. She needed to believe in Mark, but this evening hadn’t felt quite right. She wanted to believe that Phet was another teacher, but something about the smile in the woman’s eyes had left her uneasy, as though Mark and Phet shared a secret, a past. She couldn’t quite make the emotion form a solid shape in her mind but it tickled her subconscious for the rest of the evening despite Ellen’s best attempts to entertain her.

She was relieved to get back to the security and familiarity of her hospital room and lose herself in her diary for a while.

Well that was a shock. She was sitting in a darkened corner booth with a strange Thai woman who looked pretty sure of herself. She’d certainly been keeping the conversation going. I almost convulsed with jealousy when the two of them had collapsed into hysterical giggles. And she was fucking drinking. I hate that, hate how women get when they’ve had a few – bloody assertive and challenging. Still, I know how to cure that, don’t I?

I knew she’d seen me as soon as I’d settled at the bar. I’d seen her staring, just a glimpse out of the furthest corner of my eye, but it was enough. And I could see that she was hooked, caught. I knew she wouldn’t be able to resist coming over to talk to us, to find out who my companion was. Phet’s well trained though. I’ve only known her for a few days but she knows the rules and she knows her role. Do as she’s told and she’ll get paid – and laid; refuse and she’ll get hurt. She isn’t frightened of me, she just knows what to do almost without being asked. It’s a good arrangement, it suits me – for now.

I leaned forward and quickly gave her an outline of the situation, she’s a good actress and she’s quick. Satisfied with her understanding of the situation, I clinked bottles with her, and waited.

God, she’s so bloody predictable! Less than five minutes and up she trots like a faithful spaniel. I could tell she’d been burning with curiosity, her eyes flicking over Phet like she was a fucking alien or something. The relief on her face had been pitiful when I’d told her that Phet was a ‘colleague’. Oh, how she loved the respectability and convention! Phet as a whore would shock her socks off, but Phet the teacher gets ten out of ten for being acceptable and normal.

What a sucker! The look on her face when I left, like I was abandoning her or something. But she’s found a new friend, another patient. Probably another fucking psycho. I couldn’t resist having a bit of a chat with them both and this Ellen wasn’t quite what I’d expected. She was really full of herself, even put her hand on my arm at one point. I stayed cool though, cool and polite. Answered her questions, given her a bit of flannel but I can see that I’ll have to be careful, keep a close eye on the situation. I can’t risk someone else getting too close to her, sharing secrets, telling tales. Not that she has anything to talk about.

I thought, just for a minute, that Phet was going to let me down but I should have known that she wouldn’t dare. She had a funny look in her eyes like she was taking the piss. She denied it later of course but I had to give her a slap just to make sure she kept in line. That’s probably what she wanted anyway. I wouldn’t put it past her – deliberately trying to provoke me and then pretending to be frightened. God, Phet was a real find. She knows how to get me worked up and how to bring me down again. It’s a shame that her usefulness is so limited.

When I’d first seen her, she’d looked the part, cruising the hotel bar in a short skirt and heels. I’d seen her potential, how I could mould her, shape her into my personal plaything. She soon discarded the tarty clothes – they draw attention and I don’t want people to think I’ve paid for her company. Dressed decently she passes as a friend, or even a girlfriend. No affection in public though. I soon taught her how much I hate her cloying kisses, sucking up to me like I’m some sort of sugar-daddy, making people stare. One quick lesson and she stopped that. Maybe I could bring her along on my next trip to the hospital. Maybe I can make her part of the game. Now that could be really entertaining.

November 16th – Savannakhet, Laos

What a journey! Shit, it feels like days since I last slept and I doubt I’ll sleep tonight I’m so wired from the trip. It was just what I needed to shake off the demons of the last few days and, God, has it worked. I thought my nerves couldn’t stand much more after that trip round Hué on the back of Minh’s motorbike but ‘Oh my God, Buddha, shit,’ as Minh would no doubt say, what a hell of a journey!

I knew my instincts were right about this straight-through bus from Hué to Savannakhet. It seemed impossible when I read it on the poster, and, having survived the last twenty-four hours I can see how impossible it would be.

I set off from Hué at nine o’clock last night on a tourist bus bound for Hanoi. They’d overbooked so two young Israeli girls ended up sitting on plastic stools in the aisles. One of them was next to me and, as they’d just come over from Laos, they were keen to share their experiences and enthusiasm. Laos really sounds like the Promised Land. It’s funny because I was really nervous about coming here but, somehow, they dispelled many of my fears.

I was dropped off, with four other passengers, at Dong Ha – Vietnamese for ‘In the Middle of Nowhere’ – and we were presented with our options:

a) Bus at midnight, wait at the border from 2am until 7am and cross in the morning; or

b) Stay in Dong Ha for $5, have breakfast, leave at 5am and cross the border at 7am.

I had a feeling I might have been conned but there was very little I could do about it. I instinctively gravitated towards two Swedish girls I’d been chatting to in the café in Hué, and waited to see what they were going to do. It turned out to be option b.

The café owner had told us that we’d be the only people on the bus but, by the time it left Dong Ha, it was seriously overloaded. There were enough seats for twelve people and I counted nineteen on the bus. It was so cramped that one man had to get out of the window when we arrived at his stop. The two Swedish girls looked quite alarmed but all I could do was laugh. I finally felt free from the nagging worry that had been haunting me since Hanoi.

To boost my confidence I turned down a proposal of marriage on the bus. I’ve been wearing a wedding ring (what a bloody irony) to put men off, but this one was being egged on by his older sister. He didn’t seem hurt by my rejection, he simply switched his attentions to the older of the two Swedish girls. If only all men were so easily dissuaded, life would be so much simpler.

It was good to be off the tourist circuit. It seems that westerners do one of two routes in Vietnam, Sapa to Saigon or Saigon to Sapa. There’s a regular bus for western tourists and a range of trips to keep us busy. I enjoyed the one organised trip that I did from Hanoi but generally it’s way too structured for my liking, especially after my wanderings in China. But on the bus to the border I felt like I was mixing with real people again instead of just seeing the surface of the country. These were people going about their daily lives, heading for work. They must have been seriously pissed off to find three extra people, plus their luggage, on the bus. I didn’t feel like I had any right to complain about the overcrowding – it was partly my fault.