Forever Breathing (Just Breathe #3) (4 page)

“Sara, Metea, Mersa, and Alex all fled the city when the Erebus claimed it. No one has seen them since.”

He turns placing his hand on the door handle. He tells me over his shoulder sadly, “I’m sorry we kept this from you, we thought you would be upset that Sara is still out there.”

My anger surfaces. He did it again, lied and kept something from me.

He turns hesitant for a moment but comes over to me pulling me into a small embrace before I have a chance to confront him. He utters over my head, “Ever, everything I do is for you, please know that.”

When he backs up he tells me, “I have to go, Jaspen will be waiting.” He lingers as if he wants nothing more than to stay right here. But he turns and places his hand on the door handle.

I ask, still visibly upset, “When you say
we
, you mean James knew?”

He nods and whispers, “Yes,” as he opens the door and swims away.

I want to swim after him and kiss him silly for protecting me but I don’t. Instead my anger surfaces at my brother who knows better than to keep stuff from me, especially after everything that happenedshehat hap. To top it off, I point-blank asked him about Alex. I am beyond pissed right now.

Chapter 5

Ever

In the midst of my little hissy fit I decide that I need to confront James. Yes, I know split second decisions are not good, ever. What can I say? I found a nice black rock and wrote on the wall in my room: Went to see James.  I figured it would be the pot calling the kettle black if I didn’t let anyone know where I went. Not to mention, I don’t want Jack hurting any more than he already has. I’ll probably return before he gets back from the caves, fingers crossed.

I close my eyes and focus on my bedroom back on land. It’s a safe bet that no one will be in there. The water shifts around me and cool air hits my nostrils. Crap, I forgot the fin. I’m falling to the floor, realizing as it’s too late. I will my legs but a thump reverberates through the floor of my bedroom.
Stupid, Stupid!

I shift my position but don’t make any movements. If my parents are downstairs there is no mistaking they would have heard it. I wait for the sound of footsteps on the stairs but the house seems silent. I push to stand up and take in the sight of my bedroom. It’s been a while since I’ve been here. A light sheen of dust has settled on my dresser and desk. Movement outside my door grabs my attention. I scramble to the other side of my bed and crouch down. The door creaks open and
footsteps enter the room. I crouch lower almost scooting under the bed and close my eyes, wishing I could ‘will’ myself invisible.

After a minute, the door clicks closed and I let out the breath I was holding. I peek over the side of the bed to make sure whoever was in here, is gone. That was close. Now I feel regret, maybe coming here was a mistake. I sink to a sitting position and lean my back against the bed. Maybe I was premature coming here. I know I’ll see James again and Jack will be so upset when he sees the stupid note on the wall. I shake my head and get up intending to go back. Before I can focus on anything, the door to my room swings open and my eyes meet James’ round, brown ones.

“I knew you were back. God Ever, can’t you make an entrance quietly? What if Mom and dad had been home? They would have heard you.”

My blood is boiling again and I am suddenly furious. I cross the room quickly and poke him in the chest. “You lied to me. How could you lie to me after everything that happened?”

He takes a step back, confused.

“What are you talking about?”

“You didn’t tell me about Alex.
Why
James? I asked you and you lied.”

He frowns, “Jack told you huh? I told him to tell you when you woke up, get it all out in the open. But he insisted he would tell you eventually, that the time wasn’t right.”

I sink to my bed and sit on the edge, out of energy.

His voice is strained, “Ever, why are you here?”

I look up at him and glare, “To give you hell!”

“Does Jack know you came here?”

I shake my head slowly.

He exclaims, “Oh great!” and runs his hand through his hair pacing in a circle.

“Why do you have to make so much drama out of everything? Can’t you just be normal, for once?”

I get up mad again, “I’ll have you know, this is the first time I’ve had any “freak out” since everything went down. In fact I think I’ve dealt with things very well.”

He looks at me staring and unbelieving, “Really, because if that was the case, you wouldn’t be here to yell at me, you would still be in the sea with Jack?”

I walk towards my desk and sit in my computer chair resting my head on my hand.

“I’m just so relieved that Alex is still alive.”

James crosses my room and sits on my bed.

“Um Ever, when were you planning to go back?”

I shrug my shoulders, “I guess tonight.”

He rests his elbows on his knees and stays silent.

I can tell he is thinking about something so I ask, “How are things here? How are mom and dad?”

He doesn’t look up but answers, “They are good, not home right now, lucky for you.”

Nonchalantly he adds hesitantly, “Ever, he’s here.”

I ask for clarification, “Who’s here James?”

Under his breath he mutters, “Alex.”

I suddenly can’t breathe. I gasp for air after a few seconds. Oh my god, one minute I think he is dead and a few hours later, I find out not only is he still alive, but on land with my brother.

I leap up and stand in front of James not sure what to do with my hands. I want to cross my arms to shame him but I also want to hug him for telling me the truth.

He looks up worried. I can tell just from that look there must be more.

“What is it James, don’t keep things from me. By now you know better.”

He shakes his head, “No, I was always against that, you’re a big girl and finally making decisions.”

I smirk at his remark.

“Then tell me, why is he here?”

“Ever, I’ll tell you but truthfully, if you aren’t in a hurry to go back, I think you should hear everything from him.”

My heart starts beating a thousand beats a minute at the thought of seeing Alex again. I’m not sure it’s a good idea.

I plead, “James, I really need to go back, can’t you just tell me?”

He shakes his head looking down at my worn, brown carpet.

“I really shouldn’t. He needs to tell you. He knew you’d come back. I don’t know how he knew but he said that

This makes every alarm go off in my head but I turn a blind eye to them. If
James
won’t tell me then I will just
have to
see Alex. He’s never denied the answers to my questions before, why would he start now?

I walk toward the door, “Can you check and make sure no one’s home so I can get a shower?”

He gets up and leaves; coming back a few seconds later to let me know the coast is clear.

***

As James drives the jeep toward the lake, I relax with the familiarity of the trip. It’s been awhile since I made this trip. I glance out the window at the dense growth surrounding the road. Small sage brush bushes grow along the road. Wildflowers are blooming across the fields in every color. They remind me of the ocean’s version of wildflowers, the beautiful coral dotting the bottom of the sea. It’s amazing how I can feel at peace in both surroundings when they are so vast and different. The
engine halts and I realize we have arrived at the lake. I scan the lake and surrounding grassy field noting that we are the only people here.

I turn to James and ask, “Does he know we’re coming?”

He nods, “I called him when you were in the shower.”

I look away unsure about how I feel about that. James seems awfully close to Alex suddenly.  I peek over at my brother again and realize how much he has really changed yet again. He’s taller, his seat is pushed way back so his legs can fit. He’s also let his dirty blonde hair grow out a bit. It’s longer, reaching the nape of his neck.

We sit there for a few minutes silent, each of us in our own thoughts. I can tell he is still hurting over Sara. His approach to things doesn’t seem like the usual upbeat James. A bit of sadness seems to tinge his voice when he speaks.  I hope he finds someone new soon, if for nothing but to take his mind off of Sara.

“Hey, how is the band? Have you been playing?”

He nods, “Yeah, I really missed it. It’s one of the main reasons I came back.”

He turns to me more serious this time, “Ever, I’m not sure I want to go back.”

This doesn’t surprise me but it does make me a little sad. I guess with the changes, now that the Erebus are in charge, we will still be able to see each other.

I nod in response. Before I can say anything a black truck pulls up beside us. Memories concerning that truck flood back to me and I blush. Twice I kissed him in or near that truck.
I
did, not him. Why am I letting this get to me? I have Jack now, finally, the one person meant for me. Why am I even thinking about Alex in that way?

The passenger door beside me opens abruptly and I’m greeted with those vibrant green eyes that are so familiar. I search his face for his mood. He seems genuinely happy to see me.

“Hello beautiful! Long time no see!”

I smile, “Hi you!”

He holds his arms out and steps back. I climb out and fall into them. Any apprehension I was feeling, melts away. I missed this guy. Jack is
so
my one and only but I can’t live without Alex either. This realization hits me hard as I remember my recent sadness when I thought he was dead.

I pull away and punch his arm gently, “Don’t do that to me again.”

He smiles, “And what exactly did I do?”

“I thought you were…gone…”

He nods and jokes, “Well if you had decided to hang around a bit longer, you would have known I got out of the city before the fighting got intense. I would have taken you with me.”

He lets the real meaning of this settle and I take a step back. Of course he wants to settle back into the way we were when Jack was gone.

I brush it off smirking, “Well I’m good, thanks for asking.”

James pipe in, “I’ll just go over here.”

We both look at him as he nods and walks away toward the other side of the lake.

As I turn back to Alex, he shakes his head and leans against his truck crossing his arms.
Oh man
, he is still so nice looking. He’s done the opposite of James; he’s gone and cut off all of his long blonde locks. It works for him though. Actually, I like it better short.

I avert my eyes and look at the ground, moving my foot in the dirt, completely  uncomfortable, all of the sudden. He steps forward and puts his finger under my chin. I raise my eyes and see his amused smile. Same pushy Alex, how could I have forgotten?

“Really Ever, you could still come with me.”

I frown and take yet another step back so his hand falls from my chin.

“You know I can’t, nor do I want to. Alex, I’m with Jack. It’s where I belong.”

He shakes his head, “But he hurt you, I would never hurt you...”

I sigh. This is going nowhere so I cut him off, “James said you have something to tell me, so spill it.”

He takes a deep breath, looks everywhere but my face and starts, “I’m here to warn you.”

His voice turns soft, “I care about you and I really want to keep you safe. No Ever, let me rephrase that,” His eyes rest on mine, “Ever, I love you, and the only safe place for you is with me.”