Forbidden Broadway: Behind the Mylar Curtain (80 page)

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Authors: Gerard Alessandrini,Michael Portantiere

BOOK: Forbidden Broadway: Behind the Mylar Curtain
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SARAH

I'll do anything if you'll stop playing that song!

COALHOUSE

Ha, ha, ha! Lets go pick up a few Tonys in my new Ford!

SARAH

Okay, honey!

COALHOUSE

SARAH

BOTH

[BEN BRANTLEY enters.[

BEN BRANTLEY

Stop right there!

COALHOUSE

Who, sir, are you?

BEN BRANTLEY

I'm Ben Brantley, chief critic of the New York Times.
And here's a little review from the boys down at the
office!

[He smashes the car.]

Have you driven a Ford lately?

[He leaves.]

COALHOUSE

That critic just totaled our car!

SARAH

Forget about it, Coalhouse. We're getting married
tomorrow!

COALHOUSE

I'm not marrying anyone until he prints a retraction.

[He exits.]

SARAH

Coalhouse, wait! Oh, what am I going to do now? I
know-I'll go ask the President of the United States for
help. Yoo-hoo! Mr. President! My fiance won't marry
me, and I got a son!

VOICE

Look out, she's got a gun!

SARAH

No! I said," I got a son. A son!"

VOICE

Whatever.

[Gunshot! SARAH dies, falling offstage and tossing the
baby to MOTHER, who enters with COALHOUSE as
SARAH is handed a Tony.]

COALHOUSE

Noooooo! She's dead! I'm bitter and angry and
disillusioned.

MOTHER

Why? Because they killed an innocent woman?

COALHOUSE

No, because they gave her a Tony and not me!

[COALHOUSE exits.]

MOTHER

I know what you mean.

[MOTHER exits. COALHOUSE re-enters.]

COALHOUSE

I won't stop killing innocent people until the there's
justice for Ragtime!

[FATHER re-enters, ivearinga Mickey Mouse Club hat.]

FATHER

Don't be naive, Coalhouse. You can't stop the Mouse-
ification of Broadway.

COALHOUSE

But if I surrender, they'll shoot me, and I still won't win
a Tony.

FATHER

I promise you that they will and you won't.

COALHOUSE

I believe you. I'm coming out.

FATHER

You've made the right decision, Coalhouse.

COALHOUSE

[COALHOUSE is machine-gunned to the ground; others
enter .1

OTHERS

[Singing to the time of the title song. I

COALHOUSE

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