Fish & Chips (27 page)

The climb wasn"t terribly steep, since the path was cut into switchbacks up the mountainside to preserve the natural flora, so it took a little time to get up there. They walked quietly for a few minutes before Zane spoke up. “It"s not the height, you know.”

“It"s the falling,” Ty finished for him with a nod.

“Yeah,” Zane murmured. “You know me; always want to be in control.” He snorted like he"d made a joke.

Ty watched his footing diligently, smiling to himself while Zane couldn"t see his expression. He knew all too well how anything Zane couldn"t control, or at least figure out, drove the man to unbearable reaches of crazy. “Yeah,” he finally said softly. “But sometimes you miss the best things because you can"t control them.”

“Like what?” Zane"s voice was relaxed and reflected some curiosity.

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Ty smiled wider, glancing behind him to get a look at Zane. “If you have to ask….”

“There are things I do even though I can"t control them,” Zane said pointedly as he swatted at Ty"s ass. “But choosing free fall? No.

I"d rather face… snakes in the mountains,” he said with a little chuckle at the end.

Ty snorted derogatorily, unappreciative of the attempt at humor.

He still found very little about that episode of mountain hiking gone wrong funny.

“Right. It"s the difference between something just edgy enough to get a high and something truly scary,” Zane said as they slowed near the top of the cliff.

Ty shook his head and sighed. The view up here was beautiful, but it was often depressing for Ty to catch a glimpse into Zane"s thought processes. He would much rather stare at the ocean beyond the cliff. “You"re all about the high,” he said sadly.

Zane edged one shoulder up. “Can"t deny that, I guess.”

Ty would have had to call bullshit if he"d even tried. Ty turned to look at him. The sun was setting, casting a warm glow over everything, including Zane. Sometimes Ty wished he knew what to say to help Zane, but then he reminded himself he wasn"t exactly what one could call stable, either. There was a lot of pot and kettle going on here.

Instead of anything particularly inspiring, he just waved his hand at the cliff"s edge. “Endorphin rush is one hell of a high. Sure you don"t want to jump?”

Zane raised a brow and walked over to the railing, where he peered over the side and watched another man jump, screaming and flailing all the way down to the dark pool of water far below. He turned, a wry smile in place, and rejoined Ty with a pleasant, “Hell no.

You go right ahead.”

“Fair enough. Are you going to freak out if I do it?”

The smile stayed, but Ty could see Zane"s shoulders tense slightly. “No.”

172 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux

“If you"re going to lie, baby, at least do it with flair,” Ty said wryly.

Zane rolled his eyes. “Oh
doll
, if something were to go
wrong
, how would I
ever
go on
without
you?” he drawled in a melodramatic singsong. Then he shook his head. “I won"t freak out,” he said more seriously. “I don"t like it, but I"ll deal.”

Ty gave him a thorough appraisal, not certain why he wanted Zane to take the chance and jump with him. But he did. He also knew he wouldn"t be convincing him to do it. He knew that with the same certainty he knew Zane wasn"t in love with him. The comparison dampened the thrill of jumping, that was for sure.

Zane reached out, clasped Ty"s wrist, and pulled him gently closer. Then he dipped his head to brush their lips together for a few bare seconds. When he straightened, the smile was Zane"s, not the fake smirk he"d been using to play Corbin. “Go on. You"ll enjoy it.”

Ty found himself smiling wanly, appreciating the effort. “I"d enjoy it more if I could shove you off first,” he said in a teasing, coaxing voice.

Zane"s physical reaction wasn"t one Ty recognized right off. It was almost a wince, barely there, a caught breath that he overcompensated for, eyes blinking hard. It was gone in a couple of seconds, but when Zane"s gaze darted to the edge of the cliff and back, Ty realized Zane was truly scared. He hid it well, but not well enough.

“I"ll have to see what I can do tonight to make it up to you,” Zane said after a little too long of a pause.

“You do that,” Ty said softly, regretting the teasing. He stepped discreetly to the side to block Zane"s view of the cliff, and he kissed him quickly. “Now head back down so you don"t see me jump. I"m not walking back down that freaking hill when there"s a faster route.”

Zane nodded slowly and backed away a couple steps. He paused, as if he was going to say something, but he managed a pretty convincing smile before he turned and followed the path down.

Ty waited a breath, then turned to find the attendant near the edge of the cliff watching him expectantly. There were a few people still Fish & Chips | 173

milling about, but they all seemed ready to turn back rather than going through with it.

“My turn?” Ty asked the attendant brightly. The man smiled and nodded.

Ty took one last glance down the path, patting down his pockets to make certain he"d left everything with Zane, spending those last seconds to steel himself.

He"d told Zane once, but he wasn"t sure if Zane remembered that Ty was afraid of heights too.

With one last hesitation, Ty turned and sprinted for the cliff"s edge, throwing himself over before he could have second thoughts about the jump.

The part Ty both dreaded and loved about falling was the rush of fear itself.

174 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux

Chapter 9

THE assignment was starting to wear on them. The experience of living in a fancy stateroom, eating incredible food, and enjoying the excitement of their daily itineraries had quickly faded into a slightly fearful, somewhat dreadful obligation that was certainly convincing Zane that they were here to work instead of play.

He had hoped yesterday"s evening of shopping on St. Thomas would turn up some business, but it had been tense, dull, and disappointing, just like the rest of the week had been. That dangerous amalgam made for a cranky partner but some seriously hot sex at night.

Sex. He and Ty had been all over each other for days now. While Zane had no complaint whatsoever, it was really bizarre trying to remember that they were
supposedly
working. The waiting was getting to both of them, and the sex was the only outlet they had aside from the rare foray into a carefully planned adventure like that zip line across the treetops. Each night—or day, as the case proved to be more often than occasionally—grew progressively more heated and intense.

Zane"s emotions were as well, and he was having a difficult time keeping in mind that the constant proximity and living the lie of being Corbin and Del Porter skewed those emotions. It didn"t mean the close, passionate connection between him and Ty was as real as it felt.

Everything would change when they went home. Ty would change.

Zane sighed and resolved not to think about it as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it toward the sofa. It was exhausting, having a good time. They"d been here seven extra-long, activity-filled, Fish & Chips | 175

frightfully boring days, and he was thinking spending most of one in bed sounded like a great idea, especially after Ty and his daredevil diving had strained Zane"s nerves yesterday.

Zane"s reticence hadn"t prevented Ty from running at full speed toward the edge of the cliff and throwing himself off it with the kind of cavalier pleasure only the insane could maintain and live through. Zane hadn"t told Ty, but he"d stopped at the railing around the mountainside and watched his lover jump over the edge. Zane"s heart had plummeted as if it had been him taking the leap. He had to say one thing: Ty"s form was beautiful as he dove toward the placid pool below. He wondered if it was something that came naturally or if it was all Ty"s training.

One thing he did know: Ty was fearless.

He laughed slightly, shaking his head and turning around to look through the cabin. He wondered where Ty had gotten to. His partner had mentioned something about needing to run an errand as they left the restaurant after lunch. Zane had already decided to be lazy for a while, so he"d come back to their cabin, kicked off his shoes, and padded across the room to the chaise, where he sat and stretched out with a sigh.

It was only a few minutes later when he heard the door to the stateroom open and close, and then the rustle of a plastic bag as Ty came in and set down whatever he"d bought.

“I"m pretty sure I just got groped while buying toothpaste,” Ty told him with a frown as he struggled with the tiny buttons of his shirt.

“By a tiny little old lady with dead butterflies on her hat.”

Zane had to fight hard not to laugh. He had noticed the past few days that whenever Ty got frustrated, he began pulling off pieces of clothing left and right. It wasn"t like Zane didn"t mind looking, but the fact that he was doing so now probably meant he didn"t think being groped was funny.

“I"m surprised it wasn"t more than that, you wearing those pants,”

Zane murmured, eyeing Ty"s ass.

Ty rolled his eyes. Zane wondered how much longer Ty would go before he put a stop to the lecherous comments Zane intended to keep making. He watched his partner, appreciating the view as Ty went to sit 176 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux

on the sofa, propping his feet up on the table in front of him. “I"m bored,” he told Zane grumpily. “How do people live like this?”

“I have no idea,” Zane murmured sleepily. He was bored too. But at least he could go to the casino and feel like he was doing something worthwhile, even if he hadn"t discovered anything useful so far. He"d seen Vartan Armen twice outside of their poker games, but only for the seconds it took for Armen to nod and move on. It obviously wasn"t

“time” yet.

They"d been dancing, shopping, touring, swimming, and neither really had any interest in shuffleboard. Zane had been only half joking when he suggested the country-Western line dancing lessons, which had set Ty to cackling. Aside from those options, Ty was stuck…

sunning himself and making nice with Signora Bianchi, whom he desperately avoided every chance he got. It had moved past funny into ridiculous a day ago.

Ty dug the heels of his hands into his eyes and groaned miserably as he rubbed at them. Zane opened one eye to peer at him. “What"s wrong?” he asked. The rubbing looked like more than simple tiredness.

“Are you that restless?”

“Yes,” Ty answered in frustration. “I haven"t gone for a run in a week,” he grumbled as he sat up, and his knee began to bounce rapidly.

“The only thing I"ve managed to do is climb half a rock wall and then nearly fall off. And paddle lazily around some private island.”

“So go for a run,” Zane said easily, ignoring the sarcasm.

“There"s a really nice running track around the upper outside deck.

You"ve got the body of a runner. No one would think anything about it.”

“Oh, I have the body of a runner, huh? Zane,” Ty said slowly, closing his eyes as he leaned forward, as if he were about to broach a complicated subject with a small child, “I have never been leered at so much in my life,” he said with emphasis. “By men
or
women. There is no way in hell I"m going to any of the gyms or running anywhere unless it"s nighttime and everyone"s at the clubs trying to get laid.”

Zane couldn"t hold in the quiet laugh. “Poor baby. You cannot tell me you haven"t been ogled a lot in your life.”

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Ty looked at him with wide eyes, his frustrated expression one of complete sincerity. “No,” he insisted. “At least if I was, I never fucking noticed it!”

Zane frowned. “You"re serious?” He looked Ty up and down significantly.

“Yes,” Ty said in an affronted voice. He shifted uncomfortably under the sudden scrutiny and stood. “Why?” he asked defensively as he began moving toward the balcony.

“Because….” Zane had seen Ty use his good looks to his advantage. He knew that Ty was aware of how he appeared to others.

He could turn on the charm and all but the coldest of hearts would melt for him, and half of that battle was physical. But Zane suspected what Ty was talking about now was a different type of ogling, and he thought better of a flippant answer. He studied Ty for a long moment, realizing that blowing off the question wouldn"t make his partner feel better. “You"re a very handsome man,” he settled on, keeping his voice low and serious.