Find A Way Or Make One (14 page)

What? Can my girl really not see that I want it all with her? I grab her face with both hands as I look into her eyes, willing her to feel my sincerity. “Kye, I am definitely thinking long term. I have been since the day I met you. Even if I was too much of a pussy to say it or too much of a fuck up to make it happen, I was always thinking long term. Give me this one chance to show you.”

Kye turns her head away from me again and closes her eyes. “Wyatt, I am going to take a leap of faith here. Promise that you will catch me?”

I put my hand on her shoulder and kiss her temple. “Every day of the week, and twice on Sundays.”

She lays her head on my hand. “I don’t know about you but I am starving. Do you still like your eggs scrambled with A1 sauce?” The first time she made me breakfast I had asked for scrambled
eggs. When I had seen her eat her eggs after mixing them with steak sauce I had decided to try it and became an instant fan. Since then I have always eaten my eggs with A1. “Yes, my Darlin’ Princess; eating my scrambled eggs with A1 sauce is yet another craving that you have permanently instilled in me.”

She looked over at me and cocked her eyebrow inquisitively. “
Another
craving?”

My smile became downright wicked. “If you can’t guess what my other craving is, I guess you will just have to get back in bed and let me show you.”

Kye rolled her eyes and jumped out of bed reaching for her tank top and yoga pants. “I don’t think so, you horn dog. I am hungry, for food! And before we can even think about playing naked leap frog again I
will
eat! You can go take a nice, long,
cold
shower.”

I laughingly pout. “But sweetheart, you know I will make every hungry grumble worth it.” Just as I get out of bed and start stalking over to where Kye is dressing, my stomach lets out a low growl of its own. I let a long frustrated sigh. “Cockblocked
by my own damn stomach, how wrong is that? Fine I will go take a
very
short
, very cold shower and meet you in the kitchen for breakfast.” I lean down and give her a kiss on her cheek, then lightly smack her ass. “Now, my Darlin’ Princess can go fix her man some breakfast!” I quickly head to the shower and barely get the door closed before I hear a pillow hit the door.

I hurry through my shower, and quickly pull my clothes back on. As I am walking down the hallway to the kitchen, I hear the front door open and close. Figuring Kye stepped out for something I continue down the hall until I hear a deep voice yell, “Ok, I have two little bundles of energy that have missed their Momma something fierce.” Filled with confusion and dread, I
slowly walk to the doorway to the kitchen where I see
two little boys; one light skinned and red headed, and the other with dark hair and olive skin rush to Kye who drops to the floor and grabs them both in a fierce hug. Out of the corner of my eye I see a man about twenty-eight or twenty-nine smiling indulgently at the scene before him.

Two things become immediately clear. Even though I am not around young children that much, I realize that these two boys are about a four and five years old, with maybe a year between them. I also realize that even though they both called Kye Mom, their coloring makes it virtually impossible for them both to have the same father.

Which means that Kye, the girl I had been pining after for seven years, has two children, and they have different fathers.
As I come to terms with the fact that the girl I had loved in vain for seven years had only been an illusion, I quickly walk out the door.

***

It has been three maybe four hours since I left Kye so she could have some time with her
family
.
Damn, the thought of her making a family with someone else was a tough pill to swallow. And not only had she had a child with one guy, but she had had children with not one but two guys.
While I didn’t know who the father of the older boy was, the coloring of the younger boy was somewhat reminiscent of the man that brought them to the place Kye was staying. Was he the boy’s father? If so he was weirdly accepting of her other son who was born
within a year before his own. Hell, they were Irish twins with different dads, trying to wrap my mind around Kye having one kid was hard, but having two kids with two different men in such a short time blows me away.

I have been here in the hotel bar for the past two hours, chasing shot after shot of Johnnie Walker. I know that I have long since passed the acceptable drunk stage and have taken up long term residence in the land of the totally shit faced.

Eventually I gave up on shot glasses and made a straight line to the bottle.
No matter how much Johnnie Walker I put away, I couldn’t get the images of Kye with two different men out of my mind. I kept hoping that the next swig would take me into oblivion but it never did.

“Wyatt baby, you don’t look so good. What is wrong?”

I look over and try to focus on Sable.
No matter how hard I tried, I still kept seeing two of her. Regardless of the fact that Sable has irritated me since the day she came to work for the company, and regardless
of the fact that there was now more than one Sable in my line of vision, I still tried to put my thoughts into words. “For seven years I was swamped in
guilt thinking I had hurt a sweet, innocent girl, come to find out she wasn’t so sweet and she damn sure wasn’t innocent. Guess reality just doesn’t live up to my illusion.”

I shook my head and started to stand up. Wouldn’t you know that I couldn’t? Sable instantly had her arms wrapped tight around my waist so she could help me stand upright.
“Don’t worry, Wyatt baby, I will help you get to your room. Then I will help you forget your reality for a little while. How does that sound?” As she said this I felt her rub her breast on my side. I let her lead me out of the bar and to our hotel suite. Forgetting my reality for a while sounded fine to me.

16

“
He is emotional herpes to me. Everything can be going ok, and boom! A flare up of epic proportions that the highest dose of Valtrex can’t help.”

Kye

Kye

It is great having two of my boys back with me; I have missed them so much! While the boys barreled into hug me I had seen Wyatt from the corner of my eye. To say that he looked like he had just been sucker punched in the gut would have been putting it mildly. Conflicting emotions warred within me over the thought of Wyatt being hurt by me and my past.

On one hand I knew and have always known that Wyatt is it for me. I might have thought that I could move on with Toby, but I have always known that for me, it all began and ended with one tall, dark, Texan named Wyatt Masters. Toby had carved his own place in my heart, but like I told Cale, Wyatt owned my soul.

But then on the other hand, I was secretly glad that I could inflict a little pain on Wyatt. He sure had done a number on me. And as horrible and vengeful as it made me, I felt that I was owed a little payback.

When he had moved to walk out of the house, those emotions had been fighting so hard for dominance over my thoughts that I had just knelt there on the floor holding Seamus and Cian. By the time I was able to gain control of the part of me wanting Wyatt to feel the same measure of pain that I had been forced to endure, my boys were talking nonstop about their camping trip with, “Unca
Rash.” Yeah, Seamus had called
Rashid that the first time he had tried to pronounce Rashid
’s name and it stuck. As much as
Rashid pissed and moaned about the name, I know he was secretly thrilled that he had a bond with my sons that none of my other brothers had.

I was regaled with all the tales of how they had camped out in the desert and how brave they had been at night when it was cold and dark, the boys conveniently forgot how insulated their tent was and that I knew Rashid
had taken a heavy duty generator with them. When they finally seemed to be out of stories to tell, I finished making breakfast, and increased the amount to feed all four of us.

After the boys ate, Rashid
and I took them to go fishing. The boys loved it, and of course that made me love it too. I had almost forgotten about Wyatt when
Rashid
brought him up. He never took his eyes off his fishing line, but I could hear the concern in his voice when he started talking. “Kye, who was that guy this morning? I never in a million years thought I would see you have a guy leave your place the morning after. Hell, even though you lived with Toby for
three years, you never slept with him, and to my knowledge you only started really
being with
him six
months before he died. What gives
Prenses
?”

Dammit! Why did
Rashid
have to be so damn observant? After struggling to find the words to explain, I finally decided
to just come out with it. “Rashid, seven years ago that guy was my world then I found out he
had been using me, so I left. A couple of weeks ago he swept back into my life and as much as I try to fight it, everything he says to me makes me want to believe that I had it wrong. The
way
he says it makes me want to give him another chance. Please tell me that I am stupid and only asking to be hurt again. If you don’t I am afraid. Afraid that I will give him the power to hurt me again in a way that can never be repaired.”

Rashid
finally looked over at me. “So he was the guy that
tore your world apart back then
? Yeah you might have
thought
I didn’t know about that, but I did. Did you really think I
wouldn’t have checked up on you?” He shakes his head and slowly rolls in his line.

“Kye, I know he hurt you. Hurt you so bad that I never thought you would get over it. But the love that I saw in his eyes before he saw us in the kitchen, that couldn’t be faked and is worth fighting for. We have a business meeting tomorrow night so I will need to crash here, and I will let you have a night’s worth of free babysitting if you promise me you will go to him and tell him everything. About Dad, Travis, Toby, all of it. I know it is scary as shit to put your heart back out there, just waiting for rejection; but if you don’t, you will regret it.”

I thought about it about five seconds before realizing that he was right. “Fine. I will go talk to him. But first I need to go home and shower and get ready. Can you handle the boys here, or do I need to help you take them home?”

Rashid
gave a soft chuckle. “Just get home tomorrow b
efore the boys wake up,
ok? I don’t want to have to walk through the slippery ground of ‘adult sleepover’ with these two. Ok?”

“Alright Rashid
, just make sure my babies don’t see you indulging in any ‘adult sleepovers’ either, ok? I would like to keep them ignorant of that for as long as possible,
capiche?”

He laughs as I go and kiss by boys and let them smother me with hugs and kisses of their own.

***

As I got out of the cab and walked into the hotel where I know Wyatt is staying, my nerves start to get the best of me when I think about all I have to explain. Looking around at the opulent surroundings, I am glad that I put on a white sundress before I came. At least I don’t look completely out of place.

I had talked to Sunny to find out what floor Wyatt was on and his room number. When Sunny told me that he was in a two bedroom sweet, I realized that
there really had been nothing to worry about with
Blond tramp number two. As I walked up to Wyatt’s door, I brushed
my hair off my shoulder and took a deep breath, then I knocked and waited.

And waited.

I knocked again. Just when I was about to leave the door opened, and once again Wyatt Masters took a sledge hammer to my heart.

Wyatt had answered the door without his shirt, and his hair was a mess. But that wasn’t what really held my attention. No, it was the dark red lipstick smeared around his mouth. I stood there and stared for the longest moment. I would probably still be standing there if, blond tramp number two hadn’t walk up to the door, in Wyatt’s shirt.

I shook my head and turned on my heel and left. As I was walking down the hall I couldn’t help but stop and turn around and look again. Blond tramp number two had her hands on
Wyatt’s arm and was trying to pull him away from the door. I wasn’t planning on it, but I found myself saying, “Well Wyatt
baby
, at least you stay true to type at least.”

Then I turned around and left.

***

I found myself on the same pier where I had just taken the boys to fish. I walked to the edge and sat down and just stared out at the ocean. As I was staring out at the sunset, I found it odd that I wasn’t crying. Some things just cut to deep I guess.

I heard someone approaching but I didn’t turn around. As I continued to stare out at the sun set over the ocean, a beer suddenly appeared before my eyes. After I grabbed it, Cale set down beside me. “Rashid called me and told me you were going to the hotel to talk to Wyatt, and then an hour ago he called again and said that you, at least he thought it was you, had called and told him you would be home in a little while. When he asked you how it went you said it didn’t, but wouldn’t elaborate. You want to tell me what happened little girl?”

We sat in silence and drank our beers. Cale knew that I would talk when I was ready, so he gave me time to get my shit together. Finally, I looked over at Cale and told him everything; about Wyatt coming over last night, about him seeing the boys this morning and leaving, about him answering the door bare-chested with lipstick all over his face and b
lond tramp number two. I could see Cale try to reign in his anger, as much as he could. When he had finally calmed down, he put his arm around me, and I laid my head on his shoulder.