Find A Way Or Make One (10 page)

I rock back on my heels; he told me. Probably more than what he was trying to tell me too. Yeah, it was evident that the guys weren’t going to let me hurt her again, and as pissed as it made me that they felt she had to be protected from me, I was still glad that she had friends in her corner that would go balls to the wall for her. She not only needed that, but the girl I knew and fell in love with certainly deserved that.

But there was more in Crow’s words than just the typical macho warning. With his continued stress of Kylee’s name now being Kye, I started to understand that Kylee was no longer the sweet, easy to please girl I knew before.
Before, she had never asked for too much of my time, had been happy for anything I gave her. She had always tried to help me see the best in everyone and every situation. She had been my light in the darkness, my saving grace, and I had
thrown it all away. Instead of trying to be a good little soldier, I should have been trying to be Kylee’s light in the darkness; her saving grace. But I hadn’t and now the Kylee that I had known before, the sweet girl full of innocence was gone.

She was now Kye, and Kye was a strong woman, a woman who would not let anyone walk over her, and gave as good as she got. She had to be in order to demand that kind of dedication and devotion from a bunch of cynical, wise ass Seals.
It wasn’t until that moment that I finally understood just how bad I had hurt Kylee, I mean Kye
. I had never really given her the chance to be
a
real part of my life. Yeah,
we had done all the girlfriend and boyfriend shit like dates and sleepovers, and I knew that she had loved me, and while I did love her and still do, I hadn’t allowed myself to realize the full impact that she could have had on my life and now I think
I shortchanged both of us. Not only did I not give us a real chance to survive the fallout of the debacle with Mathers and Catherine, but I didn’t give myself a chance to fully experienc
e her love. The truth is that
even though I knew I had to have her back, I know that deserve her
, and that is pretty hard to take. This doesn’t sit well with me at all.
The irony of me not being enough for her after what I told her seven years ago was a bitter pill to swallow.

After being confronted with that truth, some of the fire left me. The fire and righteous determination that I would have her was gone, but my need to have her, all of her, both
Kylee and Kye was remained. I knew in my heart, and deep within my soul
that would never abate. I put my hand out in a pleading
gesture
as I told Crow what is my heart.

“Crow, I know you don’t know me, and I know that you think I don’t deserve her, and you are so right, I
don’t. B
ut she is my
EVERYTHING
. I don’t care if she is now being called Kylee, or Kye, or even is she wants to be called Queen Bitch, as long as she will be
my
Queen Bitch I will be happy. Seven years ago I fucked up. No,
I didn’t cheat on her, but I didn’t give her the place in my life she deserved. I have paid for my mistake over the last seven years, when I was forced to merely exist. Seeing her today was the first time in seven years that I have been able to really breathe without the two ton weight of regret on my chest. All I am asking for is a chance. One chance to give my girl the life, love, trust, and any and everything else I should have made damn sure she had the first day I met her
.”

The shock on Crow’s face when I finished saying my piece was almost comical. After a second or two Crow started shaking his head, “I knew you couldn’t be
so dumb and backass backwards as to actually cheat on Kye. I mean damn, look at her, she is probably the most gorgeous female that I have ever seen, and her heart only makes her more so. She is good man, good down to the fucking
core. She would do anything for
anyone.
Hell that is why she had to pull a fucking knife out of her own shoulder tonight.”

Stunned, all I could do is stare blankly at him a minute. When I finally pulled out of my shock, social niceties were the last thing on my mind. “What the ever-loving hell are you talking about? How did Kylee, I mean Kye, get stabbed?”

Crow backed up and ushered me inside. As he motioned me to sit down in the recliner in the living room he walked into the kitchen and came back with two beers.
As he set down in the other recliner he opened the beers and gave me one. After he took a swig, he looked down the hallway, “When Kye was leaving the club tonight an old friend
approached her to ask for her help. Hi
s sister was sold to an Armenian
sex trafficking ring by her bitch of a husband. Kye decided to go in and get the girl by herself, but you know how missions go when you haven’t had enough time to do proper recon; FUBAR doesn’t even begin to cover it. When Kye got there she told her friend to go and create a distraction. She had figured that there would be
other girls, and had made contingencies to get them all out. Knowing Kye, she had her entrance and exit planned down to the seco
nd, but she didn’t plan on their being two rooms of
people waiting to be sold; one for males and one for females.
Getting the boys, and the fact that the sister
wasn’t with the girls caused her to not be able to fully utilize her plan. When she went to get the girl, the head o
f the organization hadn’t been properly neutralized. There wasn’t enough time. After she thought she had neutralized the target, she went to get the girl. While her back was turned, the target threw
a knife that landed in her shoulder. She still managed to
get everyone to the warehouse safely. There she fainted. We got the call and went to the warehouse, where
she had regained consciousness and to say she was pissed would be vastly understating things.”

Oh my God!
Darlin’ Princess had been stabbed.
I had just found her again, hadn’t even had the chance to get her back yet, and I find out that I could lose her, hell!
What was she thinking going off to do
something like that on her own? Running my hands through my hair, I let out a
frustrated groan. “What the hell
was she thinking going in alone?
Why didn’t she get back up? Sur
ely she didn’t think she could do it on her own?”

Crow looked at me like I had lost my mind. “You don’t get it do you? I don’t know who you think she is, but Kye is the strongest and most stubborn person I have ever met; man or woman. And she is fiercely loyal. She would lay down her life for her friends and family in the blink of an eye. Hell, she even…”

Whatever Crow was about to say was cut off by Cale, who chose that moment to walk in and go to the kitchen, but stopped as he saw me. “What the fuck are you doing here
asshole? I thought you would unders
tand after tonight you are not wanted around here. And Crow, keep your damn mouth shut. You weren’t even out of Buds training when Peru went down.”

I don’t know if it was the stress of tonight’s events, knowing that Kylee had been stabbed, or just that Cale acting like he had more right to be in Kylee’s life than I did, but whatever it was, it made the little bit of control I had on my emotions snap. I jumped up and stared
Cale in the eyes. “What the fuck is your problem? I may have
fucked up seven years ago, but I love that woman in there and I am going to do my damnedest to get her back. So unless you are going to tell me you have already staked your claim, I suggest you quit this shit and quit it now. I don’t want to kick your ass, but I will if I have to.”

Cale snarled at me. The fucker actually snarled at me as he said, “seven years
ago you fucked up and went on your merry fucking way, and because you run into her again you think she should let you back in her life? Y
ou must be on some powerful shit, if you think that anyone is going to let you hurt her again.”

At that, we both
began to stare each other down; the tension between us almost visible.
We stayed like that for what seemed like forever.
The stare off was finally broken when Sunny yelled at Cale, “I need the coin. I need it red
and I need it now. Oh, get some more
triple distilled Vodka.”

Cale glared at me a second long
er then went into the kitchen. He goes to the stove, and I immediately see
him pick up a metal stick with a rubber handle off of an opened stove eye. He turns around to open the fridge and grabs a bottle that I assume is the triple distilled vodka. As
he
walks out of the kitchen I see that the metal stick actually has a fifty cent piece welded to the end, and it is indeed red hot. He walks in to the bedroom and closes the door.

I get up and make my way to the door to see what the hell is going on. I feel Crow’s hand pull at my shoulder. “Man, in that room is one place you don’t want to be if any of that verbal diarrhea
you spewed from your mouth was true. You know that Sunny is good, hell he was
your
Swim buddy in Buds. Besides, if you go in there, Cale
will
go after your ass, and fixing Kye is the most important thing right now.”

Taking a deep breath, I slowly nod my head. I move to sit back in the recliner, when I hear Sunny yell. “Shit girl, I have got the meds right here, please let me give you this shot. You know that you are safe here with us.”

What in the ever loving hell is going on in there? Forgetting about all the reasons why I shouldn’t go in there, I walk to the door and slam it open. I should have listened to Crow.

Kylee, I mean Kye, was lying on her stomach on the bed with her shirt off.
Ken is holding a white cloth to her shoulder, but the blood is quickly turning it red. Chip is handing Kye the bottle of vodka that Cale brought in. After taking a swig, Kye turns her head to look at Sunny. “No fucking dice. You know how I feel about that shit. I can’t and won’t do it
. This vodka will numb it enough.” Kye takes another long swig and hands Ken the bottle.

Sunny shakes his head. After grabbing the stick by the rubber handle, he walks over to Kye. Chip sits on Kye’s back to hold her in place, but really there is no need. She never once flinches, just stares off into space.

After Sunny is done cauterizing the wound, he pores a little of the vodka on the wound. Again she doesn’t flinch. She j
ust lays there staring into space.

About that time, Cale looks over to the door and narrows his eyes at me. After
nodding his head to the door I slowly walk out, with Cale, Chip, Ken and Sunny closely behind.
I start to go to the recliner that I had been sitting
in previously, then stopped. “Ok, clearly this is going to be one hell of a long night. I hope you boys don’t mind, but I am going to get a beer. Could I get any of you one?”

Each of the guys said they wanted one, so
when I went to the fridge, I just grabbed the six pack of Heineken and brought it with me to the living room. I grabbed one and sit back
in the recliner
; and then we wait.

Sunny checked on Kye about every
thirty minutes.
About four hours later, sounds started coming from behind Kye’s room. At first it was just sounds of Kye tossing and turning on the bed. I was initially worried about Kye reopening her wound; but after Sunny told me that
wasn’t likely to happen I tried to calm down. Suddenly, Kye’s voice could be heard, repeatedly moaning, “No, no, no. Travis, don’t do this! No!”

The pain and inner turmoil that I heard in my Darlin’ Princesses voice ripped out my heart. What the hell had happened to her? I stood there praying that Kye had not had to endure what I was beginning to think she had.
I slowly started realizing that Sunny was having a heated argument. “…hell did you not set her alarm Sunny? Hell, Toby told all of us long ago that anytime she sleeps for four hours this would happen!”
As I set there, I grew more and more frustrated. What the hell was wrong with my Darlin’ Princess, and what the hell did this mother fucker Toby have to do with it?

Rubbing the back of his neck, Sunny let out a growl of frustration. “Shit Cale, with everything that happened tonight, I completely forgot. Anyway, she needs her rest.”

“Well she sure as hell isn’t going to get any rest locked in a damn night terror, struggling to wake herself up!” With that, Cale turned to go to Kye’s room.

“What in the ever loving hell is going on?” I implored as I grabbed Cale’s arm. He stopped, and turned to look at me.

After taking in a deep breath, Cale just nods to the door. “Look man, tonight is not the time for this. If and when Kye wants you to know she will tell you. If you love her as much as you say you do, I won’t stand in your way. But if you ever hurt her again, there won’t be enough pieces of you
left to identify your remains. Now you need to leave. Let Kye have tonight and tomorrow to heal.”

“Fine. I don’t know if there is anything I can do to help anyway.”

Crow looks up from his beer. “If you want to help, come to the warehouse tomorrow morning around 8:00 to fill in for Kye.”

I nod my head. There is nothing I can do here anyway; definitely nothing that Cale will let me do anyway. Walking to the door, I simply say, “tomorrow.”

***

When I walk into the hotel suite, Sable is sitting in the living area with a glass of wine, waiting for me. By the time I close the door she is right there behind me, with her arms crossed and her foot tapping. “Where in the hell have you been? Making me worry about you all night is so not making your rude behavior earlier up to me.”

I shake my head and roll my eyes. When is this deranged bitch ever going to realize that I don’t give a fuck about her thoughts or feelings, and I damn sure am not trying to make anything up to
her, “Look Sable, there has been a change of plans
. You need to go to the convention tomorrow by yourself. I have
other places I need to be.”