Fifty Shades of Grey Tentacles (8 page)

“Oh, like I
really care
.” He said,
sarcasm oozing from his voice.

“What are you going to do with me? Why are
you kidnapping me?”

“Because you are just
so
useful to me.
Mr. Grey will now come to rescue you, because you're
really
special
to him. And then I will trap him and then destroy him
Miss. James.”

“But Mr. Grey is just a billionaire Candy
magnate, he can't rescue me.”

“Oh you're
really intelligent
aren't
you? You know
so much
about Mr. Grey don't you.”

I became so scared and began to shout and
scream,

“Let me out, let me out!”

I tried the doors and they were all locked, I
kicked at the windows but the glass would not break, but
unfortunately one of my high-heels did, and I cursed, knowing I'd
never find a pair like that again as they were last season's
colors.

“I'm so
not
going to have sex with you
later.” He said, in a way that quite obviously meant he was.

The thought of ironic sex filled me with
horror, what would it entail? Would it actually mean he'd have sex
with me and say things like “Oh, you're
so
tight.”, or “I'm
really
hot
for you
right now.” as he was
penetrating me. Or, bearing in mind it would be ironic sex, did it
mean that he'd not actually have sex with me, but cause me pain and
suffering, somewhat like sadomasochistic sex?

“I'm trapped, I'm trapped!” I screamed again,
hoping a passer-by on the street would hear me.

“
Oh
, the irony of it all.” He said
gleefully, “A BDSM submissive trapped and unable to escape!”

And then he laughed an insane laugh, much
worse than anything The Count had ever come up with. I went to try
and attack him with my tiara, and then thought better of it - not
wanting it damaged - and I was too late anyway, as the window
rolled up and he cackled,

“Say goodnight Miss. James.”

Gas began to fill the back of the car and I
felt woozy and passed out, gripping the tiara for dear life.

...

I awoke in a dungeon without doors. Feeling
around in the dark, I could find no entrance or exit. Presently, I
heard Mr. Irony's voice come over a loudspeaker,

“You're in a dungeon without locks,
oh the
irony
. Let's see if you can figure out how to escape a dungeon
that's
not
a dungeon!”

I knew it was pointless to shout or scream,
it would only encourage him.

“And now Miss. James, your
torture
will begin.” He said, in an evil tone of voice.

I felt petrified, I wondered if Mr. Grey
would ever find me; I didn't know what kind of torture I would have
to bear, but it was much worse than I could ever have dreamed of in
my worst nightmares. Over the loudspeaker, Alanis Morissette's song
'Isn't it Ironic' began playing deafeningly more so than usual, and
repeated itself
again and again
, if there was a hell, I was
then in it! This is just
so
Guantanamo Bay, I thought. I
wanted to pull the hairs out of my head, and shouted at the top of
my voice uncontrollably,

“No, please God no! Anything but this!
Noooooooooooooo!... ”

###

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