Falling for Your Madness (24 page)

“You will win. You will conquer the world in record time.”

“As you wish, my lady. The problem is, how do I fit in?”

Fitting in had not been a problem at all. When we came into Chicago, he had hugged and kissed my parents and had delighted my mother with yellow roses. He had greeted my sisters with boxes of chocolates. He had contributed a bottle of wine to our first family dinner. He had been a good sport when we played charades. He had impressed me when he wasn’t afraid of looking foolish. And when he led Derek and Michael and Daddy to a decisive victory over me, my sisters, and my mother, he never gloated or crowed, even though he deserved to. Today, he had discussed poetry with my English teacher aunt, and he had showed my boy cousins fencing moves. All Aunt Patti could talk about was the beautiful chrysanthemums he gave her. Then, to my surprise, David had taken off his jacket so that he could properly hold my cousin’s newborn baby. When my mother saw him with baby Owen, I would have sworn that
she
had fallen in love with David.

In every conversation today, at every meal, at every event so far, even though he was introduced to over forty people, he had been a perfect gentleman, and more than once, I’d had a cousin or an aunt or my grandmother pull me aside and say, “David is so great! Don’t let him go!”

David’s question to me was ridiculous. “What do you mean? How do you fit in? You fit in very well.”

“No. I mean, I want you to be proud of me. I want to do whatever it takes. I fear this may be an occasion that requires casual clothes. I have none. Could you help me get some before tomorrow’s party? I understand local department stores are open quite early tomorrow.”

“Oh, David! Really? Now, don’t be mad, but I’ve already bought you some. They’re back at the house. I thought you would need them. I wasn’t going to mention them unless you brought it up. The last thing I want to do is argue with you.”

“You bought me clothes? How did you do that?”

“With Merle’s help and a very patient saleslady at Macy’s. I bought you a pair of ordinary jeans. They are not skinny, boot cut, or relaxed. Merle snuck me into your apartment, and I measured your trousers to get the size right. Please forgive the intrusion.”

“Forgiven.”

I couldn’t tell if he was pleased or not. “I also bought you one plain, 100% cotton, black T-shirt—a nice one, not a cheap one, which I’d like to see you in just once before you return it. It has no graphic designs, no motifs, no advertisements for sportswear.”

“Perfect.”

“Really? Over it you can wear a black fleece zipped hoodie, which when I saw it, I thought
Jedi.
This is also free of embellishment.”

“You do know me.”

“And, I also bought you a pair of Puma sneakers in size 16 and a half.”

“You bought me shoes too?” He ran his fingers through his hair. I couldn’t tell if he was angry or just a little embarrassed. “Please don’t tell me you bought my socks and underwear.”

“Of course not. But I will when I’m your wife. Besides, I insist you stick with your cashmere socks. Oh, and I bought you sunglasses.” I blushed.

“Sunglasses too?” David laughed.

I bit my lip. “I thought they would look good with your beard.”

David was smiling. He was happy. “Laura. I am truly touched.”

“You don’t hate that I did this?”

“I love it. I love that you put so much thought into every decision. I imagine it wasn’t easy. I love that you worked so hard to make me comfortable. I love that you took a big risk here. When I wear those clothes tomorrow, I’ll feel like I have you with me. I promise to make you proud. I hope that this warmth is what you feel when I buy you flowers. Thank you.” He held me and kissed me. We had had very few moments alone.

This one didn’t last long. My sister Amy, the stressed-out bride, found us.

“Sorry guys. Have you seen Michael?”

“You look ill, dear lady. What can I do to be of assistance?”

“I’m a little worried about tomorrow. I’ve told Michael repeatedly that he needs to have all the guys dressed and ready for rehearsal at the church tomorrow night at five. I know how he is with his friends. They’ll say, ‘Oh, we’ve got time for one more game.’ Or, ‘It takes fifteen
minutes to get to the church, we can make it in seven.’ He can’t be late tomorrow. The church needs us out by 6:30, and our reservations at the restaurant are for 7:00. I just need somebody to be the grown-up here.”

David kissed her hand. “Never fear, dear lady. I will handle it.”

Friday, November 23, 2012

Saint Anne’s Catholic Church

1342 Park Avenue, Libertyville, Illinois

4:56 p.m.

“Don’t worry. David always keeps his promises.”

Amy didn’t believe me. We stood outside the church, at the top of the steps with my mom, Michael’s mom, Molly, six bridesmaids, and the flower girl. The priest was with us, unlocking the doors.

“See, look. There they are.”

A convoy of familiar cars drove into the parking lot. The first person to step out of an SUV was my David. David the Magnificent.

It had never occurred to me that he would bring his Armani suit. I was awestruck. The beard.
The sunglasses.
He no longer looked like an ordinary, eccentric professor. In his suit, he was a man of power, as if he moved men or moved money or moved nations at the slightest whim.
I almost lost my balance and fell down the steps.

He walked to the middle of the parking lot and stopped. All the men: the groom, the groom’s father, my father, the six groomsmen, the ushers, the ring bearer, and the best man came and stood next to him. It was as if he were leading them. It was as if he were their king.

They strode across the parking lot. David took the biggest steps. It was as if they had to run to keep up with him. When they got to the bottom of the steps, they all looked at David. He nodded. All of them, except for David, pulled out a long-stemmed rose from their jackets, ran up the steps, and gave it to one of the ladies.

David stayed at the bottom. He didn’t have a rose to give. He didn’t have a lady. He wasn’t in the wedding party.

Amy squealed. She ran down the steps to David, reached up to him, and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

The best man, Jeff, handed me a rose. “So, that’s your boyfriend?”

“That’s my sweetheart.” I couldn’t take my eyes off the man I loved.

“Dude. The guy’s a badass.”

“You’d better believe it.”

Saturday, November 24, 2012

The Liberty Room, Hilton Hotel

6567 Center Street, Libertyville, Illinois

8:02 p.m.

“So, David didn’t tell you what happened yesterday?”

My father and I were dancing. I looked for David out of the corner of my eye. My younger, teenage girl cousins were fighting over him. I wasn’t concerned, just amused. He was, after all, a perfect gentleman.

“He doesn’t boast about himself. But you can tell me.” A little twinge of fear leapt inside me. I decided to ignore it.

“We were all playing Risk and having a good time. By the end of the game he had us all saying with him, ‘The sun never sets on the British Empire.’ We didn’t have a chance. Then Jerry started mouthing off. You know what he’s like. David’s playing it totally cool. I gotta hand it to the guy. Then Jerry, who’s probably had a couple too many, said something about this girl he knows. It wasn’t very nice, and David called him down on it. Jerry ignored him and said something else and mentioned Barb. Now this is when David figured out that Barb is Jerry’s wife. David was still keeping it really cool but said that it’s ungentlemanly to say bad things about women and Barb deserves to be treated better.”

“Uh boy.”

“Okay, so Jerry’s really hot now. He laid into David about how it’s a free country and he can do whatever he wants. The other guys came in to see what was going on, and I got a little worried. David gave Jerry a piece of his mind.”

“A lecture.”

“No. That was later. David just told Jerry to grow a pair or something. I thought the matter was over. We all got up. It was almost time to go. But then, Jerry sucker-punched David and told him to keep his stuck-up British nose out of his business.”

“Oh no!”

“Then. One punch. A left hook to the jaw. Jerry’s on the ground.”

“No!”

“Honey, everybody applauded. Jerry’s had it coming for years. There’s more. Then David got up on a chair and started telling us all that our ladies look to us to be leaders or something. It’s our job to protect them and help them. He said we’ve been given great power, and it was time all of us acted like men, wielded the power well, and our women would love us more for it. He said only cowards and fools treated women badly, and if anyone else had anything negative to say about the ladies in their lives, he would take them outside and give them a knuckle sandwich.”

“He said
knuckle sandwich
?”

“He said something like that. I can’t say it how he said it. He talks all fancy.”

“What happened next?”

“He said he had promised the bride he’d have all of them at the church on time. And he always keeps his promises. I’ve never seen a group of guys move faster in my life.”

I looked over on the dance floor. David was dancing with my grandmother. The same grandmother he had sat next to during the ceremony. When David noticed that she was sitting alone, and I explained that my grandfather was sitting with his wife
,
David had said it
couldn’t be borne.

“Laura, I gotta be honest with you. When I found out that your new boyfriend had reserved a hotel room, I assumed it was because he wanted to sneak off with you, and I didn’t like it. I had decided I wasn’t going to like him.”

“David doesn’t do that. He’s only trying to protect me.”

“That’s what he told me.”

“You asked him about that?”

“Of course I did. He’s with my baby girl. I want to know his intentions.”

I giggled. “What did he say?”

“He said he loved you and that he took your boundaries seriously. And, how did he say it? He said, ‘Only the most selfish, blackhearted scoundrel would do such a thing and then come and look a girl’s father in the eye.’ Especially one who was as generous as I was. Good God, Laura, he doesn’t just respect you, he respects me and your mother too. I’ve never met a man like him in my life.”

David saw me and blew me a kiss.

“Daddy, David wants to marry me.”

“Great! What are you waiting for?”

“His dream job in England starts in January.”

“So, you’re going with him?”

“He wants to turn it down to stay here with me. I want him to go. That’s a problem.”

“What’s the problem, exactly? You marry him. Go with him. He loves you. He’s crazy about you. He’s really good to you. You’re so happy with him. He’s a hell of a guy. I’ve seen the way he treats you, and the way he treated mom today. God, Laura, you’d be a fool not to. I love Derek and Michael, but as sons-in-laws go, David makes them look like chumps.”

“But if I marry him, I’ll have to do it soon. Like at Christmas.” That was a big problem. It meant no big wedding. No friends standing next to me. No more parties. No more Patriots. I loved David with all my heart. But I loved those things too. I needed more time to say good-bye to my Boston life, or at least I thought I did.

“Is it the wedding you want? Please, Laura, I’ll
give
you ten thousand dollars not to put me through this again.”

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Boston Logan Airport

6:16 p.m.

“Before we get our luggage, David, can we sit for a minute?”

We had just landed back in Boston, and our entire flight had been rather quiet. We had said little to each other, other than, ‘You were a big hit!’ and, ‘Your family is a delight!’ Personally, I would have preferred a lengthy lecture, a quiz, and a written exam.

I had made my decision about what to do with David, but I had to follow the rules.