Faerie (17 page)

“I love you,” he whispered into her hair.

“I love you too,” she said, and realised that she meant it. “We’ll work this out, everything is going to be all right. It has to be.”

And she gave him one last kiss and made for the door.

Outside was still pandemonium, but the crowds had all been moved back to the entrance to the grounds, and were now being held back by a rope barrier and a couple of police personnel. She smeared the tears from her eyes and went into stealth mode, not able to face speaking to anyone. As she closed the front door, she felt an overwhelming flood of misery sweep through her. She almost turned and went back in. How could she leave Connor like that, covered in blood, and so afraid? He needed her and she had to desert him to go back to three children that needed her more. The two little ones were probably safe with Kieran for the time being – she didn’t think that anything was likely to happen to them in daylight hours, perhaps she could spend a little more time with him – but wasn’t that just prolonging the agony. There was still one urgent job that she’d been meaning to do for the last couple of days and as she was so close by it seemed foolish not to take the opportunity to do it. The way things were going she might not get another chance.

She walked towards Gary’s house on unsteady legs. She was still trembling, her mouth dry, in shock. How could she be otherwise? Over the last few days she had suffered one assault after another, and she had felt every moment of that attack on Connor, every second of Tom’s terrible death, and she felt sick to her stomach. She had to try and grab something positive from this terrible day. What on earth was she going to say to Gary’s mother, though? Gary had died because of her, and somehow she had to reconcile herself to that terrible truth. The dreadful feeling of guilt she felt just didn’t seem enough punishment somehow.

She had planned to take Gary’s mother some flowers from the garden, but it was too late now. She’d send some with a note to the funeral.

She knocked cautiously on the door, and waited. It was opened by an elderly woman, with a careworn face, who regarded her with some suspicion.

“Hi, I’m so sorry to disturb you, but I just wondered if I could pass on my condolences to Gary’s mum. Gary and I were friends you see – at school. We had a date... I just wanted Gary’s mum to know how much I’m going to miss him.”

“Who is it Carrie?” came the voice from the other room.

“A friend of Gary’s she just wanted to pay her respects,” the woman called back over her shoulder.

“Tell her to come on through.”

Lily already knew Gary’s mum by sight, Agnes, yes, her name was Agnes. She’d seen her up at the school on occasion, for parent’s evening and other school functions. She was a big woman, and looked so much like Gary she couldn’t have been anything other than a close relative. Lily could see that she’d been crying, her eyes red, and her face grey and putty like. She looked up at Lily as she walked in and forced a dreadful smile.

“I’m am so, so sorry,” Lily said. “I was very fond of Gary, he was a wonderful, lovely person.”

His mum gave a teary nod, patting her nose with her hanky.

“Come and sit down, dear.”

Lily sat in the armchair opposite her, perched on the edge, clutching her bag on her lap, nervous.

“He talked about you all the time you know, said the same thing about you,” his mum continued. “He really liked you. I think he was hoping that it might turn out to be a bit more, but now I’ve seen you, I think that was being a bit optimistic – if you don’t mind me saying, you’re a real stunner.” Lily had totally forgotten that she was a butterfly, and felt a sick little emptiness in the pit of her stomach.

“Not optimistic at all – any girl would be lucky to be in a relationship with him – looks have nothing to do with it. I loved Gary for what he was, not what he looked like.”  It was the truth after a fashion, and she could see that it gave the grieving woman a measure of comfort. Agnes stopped for a moment and blew her nose, composing herself. Lily couldn’t even imagine how many tears she’d shed over the last few days.

“He said that you were a kind and good person. He was right.”

Lily fumbled with the clasp of her bag, finding it hard to look at the woman’s tortured face, the guilt almost overwhelming her. When she did look up she was surprised to see that Agnes was smiling. It was a dreadful smile, though, full of lost dreams and lost hope; it was the saddest smile Lily had ever seen.

“I’d really like to know what happened, for my own peace of mind, but I don’t want to put you through it again. I’m sure you’ve been over it enough times already,” Lily said.

Agnes waved the hanky at her in negation.

“No, it’s all right, dear. I think that Gary would want you to know. Like you say, for peace of mind. I’ve been over it so many times, once more won’t make any difference. I still can’t make it real, perhaps if I say it again it will finally sink in...” She paused, staring out into space for a moment, unfocused, lost somewhere in her own reality. Then she seemed to pull herself together and said, “He went to bed as normal, and he was really excited about seeing you the next day. I couldn’t shut him up about it. He wanted me to tell him what he ought to talk about with you, and stuff like that. He was so nervous.” Lily felt the tears prickle the backs of her eyes and they finally betrayed her and spilled over the edge. “Anyway, a little bit later, I heard this terrible racket, Gary was screaming, ‘Get away from me, get away.’ I thought it was a burglar, and went rushing in and switched on the light, but the bulb blew and I couldn’t see a hand in front of me, all I could hear was his screaming...” She broke off for a moment, choking back a sob. “It’s weird, you know, but for a second I could have sworn that there was someone else in the room with him. I thought a I saw a figure on the bed, but it must have been my imagination. I rushed over to Gary and he was still screaming, but he was holding his chest, and making terrible noises, arching his back. He was having a heart attack, see. The nightmare was so bad that it just frightened him to death.”

Lily moved over to the sofa, put her arms around the woman’s ample shoulders and gave her a hug.

“I am so sorry, desperately sorry. I would give anything in the world to bring him back.”

Agnes patted Lily’s hand as it lay on her shoulder.

“I know dear, I know. but it’s a comfort to know that you brought him a little bit of happiness.” Lily could barely see through the tears, her nose running; she palmed the tears away, and took the tissue that Agnes handed her. “It’s been hard on all of us.”

Lily nodded, and when she managed to speak, her words came out as little more than choked sobs.

“I’ll see you at the funeral... Stay strong. Gary has gone on to somewhere much, much better.”

And with that useless platitude she got out before she started crying again.

Lily stepped out into the fresh air and went to the nearest wall, sitting down on it and recovering herself. How had all of this got so out of hand so quickly? When she thought back over what had happened in just the last few days, she could hardly come to grips with it. And there was nothing she could do to put it right. She couldn’t bring Gary back, couldn’t give the three Bs back their freedom. What little she had managed to achieve those creatures seemed intent on snatching back.

Lily was still shaking when she got back home. She kept seeing Tom’s face, covered in blood, and she knew that image was going to haunt her for many years to come. Of all the things that could have happened this was something she really could never have expected. That poor, poor man and poor, poor Connor. Tom had got caught up in the madness just as Gary had, and become yet another victim of this monster. She wondered if he had a family, a wife, kids perhaps. But Connor was safe for the moment. Even if they did search her flat again – which she didn’t think they could do without a search warrant, then Connor could use glamour to avoid detection. She tried to convince herself that he was in no real danger – at least not from humans.

The rest of the day was drama and trauma free, and for that Lily was unimaginably grateful. Her nerves were in tatters and she just needed a little respite from her misery. Still at least she had the reassurance that the children might just be safe now. When Lily had presented the charm bags to Liam and Sarah, they had accepted them with joyful innocence, not doubting or questioning for one second. Just the simple knowledge that they were safe from night attacks, at least, was enough to make her feel better. She sang them to sleep as she usually did, a sweet-sad tune that made her feel both happy and sad, and tucked them in. She hadn’t realise until all of this had started just how much she did love them; they had become her real siblings, and she knew that she would do anything to keep them safe.

Kieran brought a sleeping bag in and was sprawled out besides the little ones’ bunk bed, playing
Game of War
; the little ones were both sound asleep, reassured by his lanky presence and their new ‘magic bags’.

“I have to go and take Connor some food and... other bits and pieces.” Lily whispered. “For God’s sake don’t fall asleep.” Kieran glanced up and grinned at her.

“You’re bloody joking – I’m never going to sleep again. Are you sure these things will keep us safe?” he whispered back, fingering the charm he had pinned to his tee-shirt, like a war medal.

“Positive, but don’t fall asleep, anyway. That’s an order.”

Lily had packed as much food as she could reasonably sneak out of the pantry without it being too obvious, but as Claire rarely ventured in there, Lily didn’t think there was much chance of her spotting it if Lily had cleaned the place out. She had no idea what Connor liked to eat, so just grabbed a bit of everything. Kieran had sorted out an old Superman vest, that had definitely seen better days after several hundred washes, and a pair of shorts that would fit Connor. Most of Kieran’s clothes were ten sizes too big for him, anyway, which would make them just about right for the much larger man. The ointment had matured nicely and she’d made a larger pot of it this time – it should last him a good few days and she could make some more tomorrow.

When she went into her flat there was no sign of Connor and for a moment she panicked. Then she went into the bathroom and found him still sitting on the floor.

“Have you been there all this time?” she asked.

He nodded.

“I... w...w... was scared.”

Lily went and put her arms around him. He stank of dried blood, sweat and extra strong mints.

“Right now you need a shower,” she said. “I’ve brought you some clean clothes, I think they’ll fit.”

She pulled out the vest and shorts, handing them to him. “I’ll wait outside. I’ve brought some food and some more ointment as well.” She suddenly realised that he might not be able to manage the shower on his own.

“I... c... can do it,” he said, reading her thoughts.

She nodded a smile and went back through to the other room.

Once the curtains were pulled there was little chance of anyone discovering them – after all she was the legal tenant, wasn’t she? She pulled out the sofa bed and made herself comfortable, laying out the food so that they could have a kind of make-shift picnic. The bathroom door opened and Connor came through with just a towel draped around his waist. Lily felt her face glowing; she hadn’t realised just what a good body he had. He was slim, wide shouldered and narrow hipped – athletic, and really just what she would expect a fey to be. He reminded her of the drawings she had seen of ancient Greek athletes – and he was quite, quite beautiful. He had the clothes bundled against his chest and he dropped them on the chair, coming to sit down beside her, still only draped in the towel. He made a grab for the nearest cheese sandwich.

“No, ointment first,” Lily said, taking the sandwich from him. “You need to be in this world, not stuck in limbo.”

She smeared the ointment gently over his eyelids, and just like last time he blinked at her and suddenly seemed to see her clearly.

“Better,” he said. “Thank you.”

“You can understand me a bit better as well?”

“Yes, everything is better.”

She handed him back the sandwich and he shovelled it into his mouth, swallowing without even chewing.

“Slow down, you’ll get indigestion,” she said.

He laughed.

“I'wm so hunmgry,” he said, through a mouthful of food, grinning at her.

“I went to see Gary Wilcox’s mum earlier, and she seems to be dealing with his death. I just didn’t know what to say to her.”

The smile dropped from his face, and he swallowed hard, gulping the unchewed lump of food.

“Not our... fault. Not Tom, not Gary,” he insisted. Lily gave a limp smile.

“I know, but that doesn’t make me feel any less guilty.”

Connor put his hand to her face and caressed her cheek. There was so much love in his eyes that Lily found it hard to bear.

“We... will beat him,” he said. Lily bit back tears and gave him a half-hearted nod.

“Too bloody right we will, and I am going to make his death so painful that they’ll write about it in the scrolls for a thousand years to come.”

And Lily suddenly did believe it. She had to.