Exposed: Book One of The Love Seekers Series (23 page)

Every person with myasthenia gravis wanted a cure, something that would end the suffering. “That would be nice.”

“Yep, and then you can move back to Texas and babysit for me.”

I laughed. “Ulterior motives. I should have known.”

“Of course. Plus, I guess I miss you and wished you lived closer again. Girls night out just isn’t the same without you there.”

“I feel the same.” No one compared to my best friend, although, Mel came close and we’ve enjoyed some fun times together.

I heard her moving, and then Elizabeth started to cry in the background. Our time had ended. Gia confirmed it when she told me, “Sorry. Elizabeth fell and I have to take care of her. She rolled off the couch when I turned my back for one second.”

“K. Give her a big kiss and hug for me.”

“I will. And Em…”

“What?”

“It will all work itself out. Trust me.”

“Maybe. Now go and take care of my baby and I’ll talk to you later,” I ordered and disconnected the call.

Leaning back, I stared up at the ceiling. Would everything work out? I supposed it had to, but what would the outcome be? I feared and hated the unknown in a way because it took away some of my control. I’d always been in charge of my own destiny, or so I thought, however, after I got sick, I realized how little control I really had in life. With my body failing me, I wanted a little bit of that control back.

I probably would have stayed on my couch pondering my life, or lack thereof, if someone had not rung my doorbell. Odd because I wasn’t expecting anyone in the middle of the day on a Tuesday.

Slowly shuffling to my door, I reached it and leaned against it for leverage, peered out the peephole, and gasped, taking a step backwards. I almost tumbled to the floor, but threw myself forward against the door once again as I gripped my cane handle tightly.

On the other side of the door, appearing as casual as the last time I saw him, stood Bryan. What the hell? My field of vision narrowed due to the fishbowl effect from the peephole, but I didn’t need to see clearly to tell the man clad in a pair of jeans and grey t–shirt, with slight stubble on his face was indeed him. It surprised me to see him standing there since he was supposed to be in San Diego right now. Even with the skewed view, he looked amazing. His t–shirt hugged him like a second skin and I could almost count the ridges on his abdomen. Sunglasses had been pushed up on top of his head, and he jingled a set of keys in his hands as he shuffled back and forth from one foot to the next. Damn. He looked good, and I had to swallow my suddenly very wet mouth so a puddle of drool did not flow to the floor.

“Are you okay in there?” Bryan called through the door.

Crap. He must have heard me stumble, which meant I couldn’t pretend to make him wait as I ogled him, nor could I act nonchalant and cool. Busted.

Moving a couple of steps to my left, I leaned against the wall with my side and opened the door. “What are you doing here?” If my words and tone came out as accusatory, I didn’t mean for them to be; his arrival had shocked me to my core.

His eyes raked me from my feet to the top of my head, taking in my neon pink cane. “I came to say hi.”

“Hi,” I replied a little more breathless.

“Are you…” he paused and tried again. “Are you all right?”

“Huh?”

“I heard a noise and it sounded like you fell.”

“Oh. I’m fine. Just a little stumble. The wall and door caught me.” I smiled nervously. My explanation made me sound like a klutz that fell a lot. I felt like such a dork.

His brow creased and pinched, forming a frown. “Are you sure?”

“Uh, yeah. Um…did you want to come in?” I swung my arm wide toward the living room.

“Sure. Thanks.”

My heart beat had increased the moment I saw him standing there, and I couldn’t help my sudden nervousness. We sounded like two nervous teens who were about to go out on their first date. Tension permeated the air around us.

              “Do you want something to drink?” I asked, as we walked into the living room.

              “I can get it,” he offered.

              “No!” I rushed, with probably more force than need be. Trying again in a calmer, quieter voice, I stated plainly, “I might be handicap, but I can still be a gracious hostess. I have water, soda, iced–tea, lemonade—”

              Bryan interrupted me, a grin pulling his lips upwards. “And ice–cream?”

              “Huh?” My eyes fell upon the half–eaten tub of ice–cream slowly melting as it sat on my coffee table. “Oh. Sorry. It’s been a stressful day.”

              His expression changed slightly and became thoughtful and concerned. “Want to talk about it?”

Chapter 23

Bryan

              The moment I rang Emma’s doorbell, I wanted to kick myself for showing up unannounced. I didn’t even know why I came to see her except that something told me to do it. I had this inherent need to check on her.

              And when I heard her stumble, I started to panic. Sheer willpower prevented me from banging on her door and then breaking it down. I wanted to encase her in bubble wrap so that no harm could come to her anytime she tripped or fell. Hell, if they existed, I would probably force her to live in a bubble.

              While all of that sounded ideal to me, I knew she’d fight me every step of the way.

              One of the things I had discovered in the last several weeks was that Emma had a fierce and independent personality. I admired her for it, and wished she had that “in your face” attitude when it came to love too.

              She still had days when she wanted to give up, to stop fighting, but she never did. She continued to fight for herself and others. For whatever reason, Emma felt alone, and yet, she sometimes told me about different MG Flakes—as people with MG called themselves. The words she used, I could tell she cared about them, even if she’d never met them in person. She supported and passed on information on other topics besides MG: depression, anxiety, lupus, MS, and many other diseases. Emma may not share her home with anyone, but she was never alone because she was surrounded by friends, fellow warriors, and love. No one could ever take that away from her.

              She looked different now that I was seeing her again in person after almost a year. Granted we were in a karaoke bar with bad lighting, an overused smoke machine, and flashing lights. Anyone would transform when they left those conditions. Her lips seemed fuller, and her skin more like porcelain than I remembered. I always knew her hair was brown, but now I could see the strands of red and blond hiding in the mix. Her brown, twinkling eyes were sharp and noticed everything. And I didn’t recall them being so intense or the color of deep dark chocolate. Weren’t they only brown before?

              My eyes roved over her body. Dressed in dark jeans and a black t-shirt with some sort of anime character on it, her hair pushed back in a headband, her toes painted florescent pink, she looked comfortable and completely at home in her surroundings.

Her appearance wasn’t the only thing that had morphed. How she carried and presented herself changed. On the night we all met for karaoke, she acted self–conscious and fidgety, unsure of herself. And now, the very air around her exuded confidence. Confidence I knew she didn’t always feel. This woman would make men fight each other for the opportunity to have her at their side.

Today, she used a cane that seemed to match her toenail polish, and I briefly thought both her toes and her cane could probably glow in the dark.

Her cane brought me back to her reaction when I offered to get the drinks. It wasn’t that I wanted to take away her independence, I only wanted to help her because I considered myself a gentleman, and I thought it would be difficult gathering drinks for two people. I never intended to insult her or her abilities.

Seeing the ice–cream reminded me of when my sister Rayne went through a breakup, or when girls’ night descended upon my parents’ house.

“Talk about it?” she asked haltingly, confused.

Had I stuttered? Tilting my head to the side, I waved my finger back and forth between us. “Yes, talk about it. We’re friends. We talk about our issues. It’s become kind of our thing.”

“Our thing?” Only one of her eye brows lifted as if to mock me.

Was there an echo in here? Or maybe her brain had been taken over by a parrot and she only knew how to repeat words.
Polly want a cracker?
“Isn’t that what we’ve been doing on FaceSpace?”

“Uh…yeah. I guess it has.”

“You guess?” Okay, now I had transformed into the stupid parrot.

Frowning, she ignored my question and returned to her previous inquiry. “Do you want something to drink?”

I sighed and ran a hand over my face. “That would be great. Water please.” Maybe I shouldn’t have come. It might’ve been easier on me. After having yet another pointless discussion with my parents on behalf of my sister, and then another stupid talk with Rayne, I began driving toward Mel’s place, only I wound up parking in front of Emma’s apartment building. Luke had texted me the address the day after I got into town and told me to visit my Internet buddy.

Feeling the icy chill of something against my neck, I jumped and whipped my head around to find Emma leaning against the back of the couch I sat on. I must’ve really been out of it because I didn’t recall sitting at all.

Her mirthful, shimmering eyes stared down at me. “A little jumpy, aren’t you?”

“Not funny,” I grumbled and took the water from her.

She snorted with laughter. “Actually, very funny.”

The moment Emma started to talk, I began to unscrew the lid to the water bottle, pouring a little into the lid, and when she sat down on the opposite end of the couch, I tossed the capful of water at her. Wasting water wasn’t normally my thing, but I needed to retaliate a little. Besides, I thought it was funny.

“Hey!” she hissed. The grin never left her face.

“Hay is for horses,” I joked.

Snickering, she blew a raspberry. “That’s so old. You need new material.”

“But still funny.”

“I suppose.” She settled into her seat and took a sip of her own water before she asked, “So, what are you doing here?”

I liked this Emma. From what I could see, she acted more carefree. Her eyes danced and her cheeks blushed pink. She was real, and pretty. “I was in town and I thought I’d stop by.”

Squinting a little, she studied me for a moment. The wheels were turning in her head. I could practically see them spinning as she assessed me. Finally, she told me, “That’s not what I meant and you know it. What’s up?” She stretched her foot slowly forward to nudge mine.

My eyes roamed around the room. Where I had entered led into a short entryway hall that lead into a spacious living room. To the left as I came in, I saw a smallish kitchen and to the right a hallway where I could see two doors. I was certain one would be the bathroom and the other her bedroom. On the breakfast bar that separated the living room from the kitchen, stood numerous pill bottles. So many bottles. Did she really need all those medications? Overall her house was neat, organized, and perfect for her. But it was more than that. It felt lived in and homey. Her lair. The place she felt like she could be herself. So different from my house. Two bachelors occupying one house…ours was clean, but it smelled like two men.

“Earth to Bryan, come in Bryan.” Emma nudged me again in an attempt to get my attention.

“Huh?” I grunted as I once again focused on her. Had I missed something she said?

“Are you all right?” Her brow lifted again, and this time she looked concerned.

“Yeah.” I sighed and raked my hands through my hair.

“Want to tell me what you’re doing on the East Coast, and why you’re here at my place?” Her brow furrowed as she realized something important. “How the hell do you even have my address?”

A valid question. “A friend.”

“And you’re here because…?” Her fingers drummed annoyingly on the back of the couch as she waited for my answer.

Sighing, I said, “Because I couldn’t stand being around my family any longer.”

“You could have gone to Mel’s.”

“I could have, but…” My words fell off. “Where’s your dog?”

“Groomers. Freaking dog decided to roll around in the mud after it rained yesterday. He never does that, but I guess yesterday he decided to act a fool. So, why didn’t you go to Mel’s?”

“Have you ever just wanted to get away from anyone and anything that knew everything?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s me today. Mel knows my family, and I’m kind of done with them today.”

“Sounds rough.” She gaze upon me in understanding. Not pity, but look that suggested we were kindred spirits in a way. I should’ve known she’d understand more than most.

Tension and nervous energy filled me. I tilted my head from side to side, popping it in an effort to relieve some of the tightness and irritation. “My parents are in the process of separating and my sister seems to think I can do something to prevent it. I can’t. I mean it’s their own fucking decision, and I can’t tell them how to live their lives. Before I got here, I hadn’t talked to my parents since the day after I got back from deployment and my feet touched U.S. soil again. Even that conversation was short and to the point.
‘I’m back. I’m alive. I love you. Will talk to you soon.’
That’s pretty much it.”

“Maybe they wanted to talk more, but you wouldn’t let them.” Her voice sounded hopeful.

She wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt, and it made me almost feel bad for crushing her happy thoughts. “Nope.” I popped the P. “Their end of the conversation went something like this,
‘Oh, you’re back. That’s good. It’s bridge night. Okay, we’ll talk to you later. Love you too, son.’
”

“Wow. I don’t know what to say to that.”

“Uh huh.”

“And your sister though you could fix them?”

“I guess. Hell, I don’t know what the fuck Rayne is thinking. My parents have had their share of problems for years, but I figure no marriage is perfect. They always worked though their issues.”

“But?” she pressed.

“But this didn’t come out of left–field for me. My sis called and asked me to talk to them, so I guess she didn’t see it coming. You know what?” I chuckled humorlessly.

“What?”

“My parents didn’t call to tell me the news themselves. I didn’t know anything until Rayne called and told me, begging me to convince them to stay together.”

“Your sister told you?”

“Yeah.” I leaned back and stared up at the ceiling. “They couldn’t bother to pick up the phone and call me themselves. My sister broke the news to me.”

“You still came to talk to them?” When I looked at her briefly, her brow was furrowed, her eyes squinting slightly. Her head tilted to the side, and her entire expression told me she was trying to understand everything I’d unloaded.

“I told Rayne I wouldn’t come, that they were grown ass adults, but then she called Mel, and Mel got onto me. Their tag teaming worked. Here I am.”

Her hand covered her mouth, however, her laughter still escaped. She was laughing at me. It took her a couple of minutes before she could speak, and my eyes never left her. “Sorry, but two women who are on opposite sides of the country from you, managed to kowtow you into submission over the phone.”

My eyes narrowed and I glared. I didn’t think my annoyance phased her though, because she continued to laugh at me. “Yeah, they did.”

“And you don’t find that even a little bit hilarious?” She waited until I shook my head before continuing. “You. A big Navy guy who works out and has muscles, who could probably bench press either one of them, they got you to bow down and submit. Over the phone, no less.”

When she put it like that, it might have been a little odd…and funny. My lips pulled up at the corners into a smile. My first one in almost three days. “I guess I can see your point.”

“And you didn’t want to go to Mel’s because she is part of the reason you find yourself in the middle of WWIII?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t blame you there. She can be a little…” Emma paused, searching for the right words to use.

Before she could, I barked, “Controlling, manipulative, irritating, vindictive, ambitious, in your face…Please, stop me any time. I’m sure I can go on for days.”

She laughed again and shook her head. “No, I think you pretty much have her nailed perfectly.”

              A chuckle bubbled up within me as well. “It comes from being friends with her for years.” For the first time since I had returned stateside, I found myself having fun with a girl, and we weren’t doing anything sexual. “What are you doing tomorrow?” I blurted, unwilling to relinquish this feeling. I wanted more of it.

              “Doc appointment in the morning.” She frowned and stuck her tongue out as if going to the doctor were the most unappealing task in the world.

              “Please, try to contain your excitement,” I teased her sarcastically.

              “I’m not. My sister can’t take me, so my cousin will be driving me instead. Bleh.”

              “And you don’t like your cousin? I didn’t think your family was from here.”

              “They aren’t for the most part, but I guess we actually have a little bit of family all over the East Coast. Some north, and some south. This one is actually my dad’s cousin.”

              My gut told me a story existed in there. “And?”

              “I mean I like him all right. He’s a good guy and everything for the most part.”

              Sometimes it felt like pulling teeth when I talked to her. “But?”

              “He hovers without hovering. I have to tell him multiple times about things because he ‘just wants to be sure.’”