Every Glance (Every Life #3) (21 page)

Before the sun even thought about rising this morning, we were at the marina, boarding a charter boat for a morning of fishing. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how bad of an idea that was after drinking last night, but surprisingly, we all toughed it out and had a great time. We ended up bringing back several snapper, a couple of redfish, and the memories of Wes turning fifty shades of green and nearly puking on the boat captain.

We all came back to the house and crashed for a couple of hours, and I still feel like I could sleep another twenty-four. But that sure as hell won’t be happening. After dinner, we’re planning on hitting the Wharf for some drinks and live music. One of Sawyer’s favorite local bands will be on at ten, and if I’m lucky, I’ll get him home in bed by two—per Makenna’s very bossy orders.

Not that I’m the best listener.

“It’s flown by, but it’s been nice to get away,” Sawyer says before stuffing another grilled shrimp dripping with butter into his mouth. “It would be nice to bring Mak down here sometime. She’d love it.”

“You just broke your own rule, man.” Wes launches an empty skewer at him, pegging him in the chest. “No woman talk. All men, all testosterone, all the time. Remember?”

Sawyer flings the wooden spear back at him, landing it perfectly in his water glass. “This coming from the guy who was on the phone with his wife for an hour last night. The walls are pretty thin, brother.”

I swallow hard, waiting for an accusation to get thrown my way.

But it never comes.

“I’d say I’m sorry for what you heard, buuuuut…I’m not. Cal’s pretty frisky at this stage of her pregnancy.”

I wave my hands around and shake my head. “No. Nuh-uh. The conversation is
not
going there.
Any
thing but that. You two need to stow your freaking purses and drink some beer and scratch your balls or something. For the love of God, this is supposed to be a bachelor party.”

Sawyer chuckles. “Sorry, buddy, but you’re really the only bachelor here. Or at least I think so.”

Here it comes.

“Who were you talking to last night when I came into your room?”

“Nobody, asshole. Shut the hell up.”

Wes tosses his napkin into his plate. “Damn, seriously? You work fast. I’m impressed.”

“It’s nothing serious. You know me.” It’s true, right? It’s not anything serious yet, but I can’t say that I don’t want it to be. I still want to date her. I want Devyn to be my girlfriend and see how far this can go. But she doesn’t even know who I really am.

“Yeah,” Sawyer agrees. “I know you too well.”

He and Wes get off on some other conversation, and I excuse myself to go to the restroom. My phone has buzzed in my pocket a couple of times, and I know exactly who it is.

Devyn:
‘Can you talk right now?’

Devyn:
‘You’re going to think I’m crazy.’

Me:
‘I only have a sec. And I doubt I’d ever think that.’

Devyn:
‘Let’s test your theory. I’m here.’

Me:
‘Where is here?’

Devyn:
‘Orange Beach. Can you just call me?’

I lean against the bathroom stall, against my better judgment, and process this for a minute. Devyn is actually here. I told her that I wasn’t kidding when I invited her down here, but I never thought she’d actually do it in a million years.

Dialing her number, I run through a couple of scenarios of how I can get away from the guys to see her, but I know it won’t be easy and I know I couldn’t get away for long. It
is
Sawyer’s night, after all.

“Now do you think I’m crazy?” Devyn’s voice is barely more than a whisper.

“Not at all. But I’m definitely surprised.”

“Oh, no.” She exhales. “You weren’t serious when you told me to come down here, were you? I should’ve known you were only kidding.”

“I wasn’t kidding at all. I just never thought you’d actually do it. Where are you right now?” The bathroom door opens and I peek through the crack in the stall door to make sure it isn’t Sawyer or Wes. Luckily for me, it’s just a teenage boy with earbuds stuffed in his ears.

Devyn giggles softly. “Honestly, I never thought I’d do it either. I just checked into the little condo I rented. It’s called…” I hear her shuffling through some papers. “…the Seaside Escape. But it’s more like the seaside threw up in here. It’s quite terrible, but it’s also the best I could find on short notice.”

“Is that the place with the flaking pink paint and the boarded up window in the office?”

“The very one. It has a certain Bates Motel charm, don’t you think?”

I shudder at the thought. “Now that you mention it, yeah, it does. We’re about to head down to the Wharf for the evening, but I can’t sneak away for long. You know, the whole bachelor party code thing. But let’s meet at the Ferris Wheel in an hour. After that, I’ll figure something out. Sound good?”

“I’ll see you at nine.”

“Can’t wait.”

The guys and I are finally walking around the Wharf after about thirty minutes, leaving me only thirty more minutes to plot my escape. Not that we’re joined at the hip everywhere we go, but I know Sawyer will be suspicious if I suddenly have to go somewhere alone. However, being a man, he’ll understand when I tell him I have to step away to call the girl I was talking to last night. It’s not a total lie, after all. I will call her as soon as I’m there to figure out where she is.

After the second round of beers is served at the bar, I know I’m out of time to make my announcement. “I need to step out for a minute to make a phone call. It’s a little loud in here.”

“Who are you calling?” Sawyer waggles his eyebrows up and down. “Girl from last night or a different one?”

“Last night. I’ll be back well before it’s time for the band to start.” Without giving them much time to do the math that I just bought myself about forty-five minutes, I down the rest of my beer and push back from the bar. Knowing Sawyer and Wes, they’ll be too wrapped up in ESPN to notice how long I’m really gone.

I walk down the tight row of shops and restaurants, looking back to make sure the guys didn’t follow me out. There are a lot of people out here tonight since a Dave Matthews concert just ended, but I’m glad the crowd is here to get lost in. Even if they were looking for me, I don’t think the guys could ever find me.

Turning at the end of the block, I finally reach the Ferris Wheel. The combination of the gulf breeze, the neon lights, and the electric buzz of the amped up crowd makes me suddenly euphoric. Well, also knowing that I’m here to meet Devyn could also play a part in it.

I stretch up on my toes to search for her while reaching in my pocket for my phone. There’s no way I’ll ever find her in this madness.

But the cool hands that reach around and cover my eyes tell me I won’t have to look any further.

“Guess who.”

“Jennifer?” I can’t help myself.

She knees me in the back of my thigh. “I’m sure you must be confusing me with a gorgeous actress.”

I grab her hands and twist around, never letting go. “No one would ever do that. You look better than all of them.” She smiles slightly. “I’m glad you came.”

“I really shouldn’t have. I’m totally imposing on your weekend, and now I’ve made you leave your friends. I don’t expect you to spend time with me here, you know. I just thought it’d be nice to get away for a couple of days, and you made it sound so beautiful and serene here.”

“Okay, I’ll get back to my friends, then. See ya,” I joke and begin to walk away, even though I’m still holding one of her hands.

She doesn’t let me get more than a step away before she’s jerking me back. “You already came all this way, so don’t you think we should at least ride the Ferris Wheel?”

Now that I’m an arm’s length away, I notice how great she looks tonight. More youthful and carefree than I’ve seen her since she walked back into my life a couple of weeks ago. For once, she doesn’t look stiff and haggard. Her eyes are brighter, and her smile is wide and playful. Even the way she’s dressed makes her appear to be a completely different person. Her faded jeans skim over every curve and are rolled up to just above her ankles to reveal a pair of black Chuck Taylors. And a black sweater hangs slightly off one shoulder to reveal a ribbon of phrases tattooed at her collarbone.

“I escaped the oblivion,” I read aloud, stopping her hand when she reaches to pull her sweater back up. “The dark depth lost its hold the moment I found its most guarded secret. The promise that light would once again return. That hope wasn’t out of reach.”

“It’s just a book quote I came across that spoke to me.”

She never ceases to fascinate me. Right here in front of me, I have a woman who likes beer and spicy food and wears Converse and has a tattoo of probably the most beautiful phrase I’ve ever read. I guess I never truly knew her all those years ago, but aside from being gorgeous, she used to be one of the most superficial and judgmental people I’d ever met. She was a kid, though, and I believe that all of the hurt she inflicted has come back to her in so many ways.

Even the first few times I saw her again as an adult, she seemed frigid and empty, with the exception of when she was talking to Simon. It was obvious that she wore her broken heart like a suit of armor, certain to guard anyone from seeing who she really was. I certainly wouldn’t have ever imagined that, underneath her stone exterior, she was so multi-faceted, thoughtful, mysterious, and kindhearted. A deadly combination.

“I have to know…is there any truth to the words? Be honest.”

She nods and looks away. “It struck a chord with me when I read it. I can’t say I’ve always believed it, but I’ve wanted to. When you think that hope is dead and you succumb to the darkness that you’ve been fighting off for years, it’s freeing to know it’s still there if you’re willing to fight for it. But unfortunately, you get tired of fighting for what you’ll never have, you know?”

I watch her for a moment, trying to find some sort of a rebuttal in my repertoire, but I find nothing. I know exactly how that feels, and she’s completely right. Hope is very much like a starving flame. No matter how hard it fights for oxygen, it can only burn so long before there’s nothing left to feed its hunger, and it completely dies out, allowing the shadows to consume it until there’s only a mere memory of light. And then even the memory is nothing but a ghost who haunts your every thought. But eventually…eventually…the memory fades. And there’s nothing left to fight for.

I get it.

“Let’s get in line,” I say, turning and throwing my arm around her shoulders.

Thankful for the subject change, she smiles and walks with me, slipping an arm around my waist. We only have to wait a few minutes before the ride operator signals us to step forward to get into the car.

“Hey, buddy,” I whisper, slipping a couple of twenties into his hand discreetly. “You mind to let us ride until I signal to stop?”

He stuffs the bills into his shirt pocket and slaps my back. “Sure thing.”

Once we’re inside and start moving, I look over at Devyn, who is sitting on the opposite side, and crook my finger at her. “This is probably the shortest date in all of history, so I prefer to spend our precious few minutes wisely.”

She laughs and slides around to my side. “You’ll make anything a date, won’t you? Maybe for our next date, you could come with me to pick up groceries.”

“I only go grocery shopping on the fifth date. I do have morals.”

We move up higher again as the other cars are filled, and now I’m able to see just over the treetops. It just hit me. I don’t think I’ve ever ridden a Ferris Wheel before.

“Which date is this?” she asks, flipping the chestnut sheet of hair over her shoulder.

“Well, if you count dinner and a movie with Simon and then the evening in front of the fire, that makes tonight number three.”

She peeks up from under her lashes. “So what do you do on the third date?”

I swear to all that is holy that my heart just beat right out of my chest. I feel the ride come to a stop again, and I smile when I realize we’re at the very top. “The third date is one of the best ones. I kiss my girl senseless on top of the world.”

Devyn’s lips split into a wide grin. “Your girl, huh?”

“If she wants to be.” I think every cell in my body is jumping up and down.

“She does.”

Moving in closer to her, I cup one of her cheeks. “Well, I’d better get to kissing her then.”

She meets me halfway, my lips only gently brushing hers at first as if they want to memorize the exact form of the lush flesh. Even though the contact is minimal, searing warmth fills my veins like molten lead. Sinking, yielding…forcing me to surrender to the delicious weight of it, the heaviness of a desire so disorienting and mind-altering that I wonder if I’ll ever right my equilibrium again.

Her greedy lips part first, capturing my bottom lip as the most willing of prey and sucking it between her teeth to graze it with her slick tongue. She melts right into me until our souls collide, so profoundly, so completely that I feel like they’ve always been the two halves of a whole. As our kisses become increasingly urgent, my hands find their way around to tangle in the silky ribbons of her hair and pulling her so closely that not even a whisper could pass between us.

It’s in this moment that I find a sense of peace within myself. The kind of inner peace that soon follows an internal cease-fire. She doesn’t remember who I am, and I don’t care who she was anymore. We’ve shed ourselves of the ugliness that poisoned our very cores and now we’re searching for some light to fill the dark recesses left behind.

The light she brings is blinding, making even the best parts of me seem dull.

Never has any woman made me feel like I’m worth it. That I’m worth following to Orange Beach to steal only a few minutes of my time. That I’m worth taking the risk of bringing me into her son’s life. That I’m worth loving. Not that Devyn does, but if she ever gets there, I wouldn’t have to second guess her motives. She’s no longer the type to play games because she has as much to lose as I do.