Endgame Act Without Words I (3 page)

NAGG
Try.

[
Their heads strain towards each other, fail to meet, fall apart again.
]

NELL
Why this farce, day after day?

[
Pause.
]

NAGG
I’ve lost me tooth.

NELL
When?

NAGG
I had it yesterday.

NELL
[
elegiac
] Ah yesterday!

[
They turn painfully towards each other.
]

NAGG
Can you see me?

NELL
Hardly. And you?

NAGG
What?

NELL
Can you see me?

NAGG
Hardly.

NELL
So much the better, so much the better.

NAGG
Don’t say that.

[
Pause.
]

Our sight has failed.

NELL
Yes.

[
Pause. They turn away from each other.
]

NAGG
Can you hear me?

NELL
Yes. And you?

NAGG
Yes.

[
Pause.
]

Our hearing hasn’t failed.

NELL
Our what?

NAGG
Our hearing.

NELL
No.

[
Pause.
]

Have you anything else to say to me?

NAGG
Do you remember—

NELL
No.

NAGG
When we crashed on our tandem and lost our shanks.

[
They laugh heartily.
]

NELL
It was in the Ardennes.

[
They laugh less heartily.
]

NAGG
On the road to Sedan.

[
They laugh still less heartily.
]

Are you cold?

NELL
Yes, perished. And you?

NAGG
[
Pause.
]

I’m freezing.

[
Pause.
]

Do you want to go in?

NELL
Yes.

NAGG
Then go in.

[
Nell does not move
]

Why don’t you go in?

NELL
I don’t know.

[
Pause.
]

NAGG
Has he changed your sawdust?

NELL
It isn’t sawdust.

[
Pause. Wearily.
]

Can you not be a little accurate, Nagg?

NAGG
Your sand then. It’s not important.

NELL
It is important.

[
Pause.
]

NAGG
It was sawdust once.

NELL
Once!

NAGG
And now it’s sand.

[
Pause.
]

From the shore.

[
Pause. Impatiently.
]

Now it’s sand he fetches from the shore.

NELL
Now it’s sand.

NAGG
Has he changed yours?

NELL
No.

NAGG
Nor mine.

[
Pause.
]

I won’t have it!

[
Pause. Holding up the biscuit.
]

Do you want a bit?

NELL
No.

[
Pause.
]

Of what?

NAGG
Biscuit. I’ve kept you half.

[
He looks at the biscuit. Proudly.
]

Three quarters. For you. Here.

[
He proffers the biscuit.
]

No?

[
Pause.
]

Do you not feel well?

HAMM
[
wearily
] Quiet, quiet, you’re keeping me awake.

[
Pause.
]

Talk softer.

[
Pause.
]

If I could sleep I might make love. I’d go into the woods. My eyes would see . . . the sky, the earth. I’d run, run, they wouldn’t catch me.

[
Pause.
]

Nature!

[
Pause.
]

There’s something dripping in my head.

[
Pause.
]

A heart, a heart in my head.

[
Pause.
]

NAGG
[
soft
] Do you hear him? A heart in his head!

[
He chuckles cautiously.
]

NELL
One mustn’t laugh at those things, Nagg. Why must you always laugh at them?

NAGG
Not so loud!

NELL
[
without lowering her voice
] Nothing is funnier than unhappiness, I grant you that. But—

NAGG
[
shocked
] Oh!

NELL
Yes, yes, it’s the most comical thing in the world. And we laugh, we laugh, with a will, in the beginning. But it’s always the same thing. Yes, it’s like the funny story we have heard too often, we still find it funny, but we don’t laugh any more.

[
Pause.
]

Have you anything else to say to me?

NAGG
No.

NELL
Are you quite sure?

[
Pause.
]

Then I’ll leave you.

NAGG
Do you not want your biscuit?

[
Pause.
]

I’ll keep it for you.

[
Pause.
]

I thought you were going to leave me.

NELL
I am going to leave you.

NAGG
Could you give me a scratch before you go?

NELL
No.

[
Pause.
]

Where?

NAGG
In the back.

NELL
No.

[
Pause.
]

Rub yourself against the rim.

NAGG
It’s lower down. In the hollow.

NELL
What hollow?

NAGG
The hollow!

[
Pause.
]

Could you not?

[
Pause.
]

Yesterday you scratched me there.

NELL
[
elegiac
] Ah yesterday!

NAGG
Could you not?

[
Pause.
]

Would you like me to scratch you?

[
Pause.
]

Are you crying again?

NELL
I was trying.

[
Pause.
]

HAMM
Perhaps it’s a little vein.

[
Pause.
]

NAGG
What was that he said?

NELL
Perhaps it’s a little vein.

NAGG
What does that mean?

[
Pause.
]

That means nothing.

[
Pause.
]

Will I tell you the story of the tailor?

NELL
No.

[
Pause.
]

What for?

NAGG
To cheer you up.

NELL
It’s not funny.

NAGG
It always made you laugh.

[
Pause.
]

The first time I thought you’d die.

NELL
It was on Lake Como.

[
Pause.
]

One April afternoon.

[
Pause.
]

Can you believe it?

NAGG
What?

NELL
That we once went out rowing on Lake Como.

[
Pause.
]

One April afternoon.

NAGG
We had got engaged the day before.

NELL
Engaged!

NAGG
You were in such fits that we capsized. By rights we should have been drowned.

NELL
It was because I felt happy.

NAGG
[
indignant
] It was not, it was not, it was my story and nothing else.

Happy! Don’t you laugh at it still? Every time I tell it. Happy!

NELL
It was deep, deep. And you could see down to the bottom. So white. So clean.

NAGG
Let me tell it again.

[
Raconteur’s voice.
]

An Englishman, needing a pair of striped trousers in a hurry for the New Year festivities, goes to his tailor who takes his measurements.

[
Tailor’s voice.
]

“That’s the lot, come back in four days, I’ll have it ready.” Good.

Four days later.

[
Tailor’s voice.
]

“So sorry, come back in a week, I’ve made a mess of the seat.” Good, that’s all right, a neat seat can be very ticklish. A week later.

[
Tailor’s voice.
]

“Frightfully sorry, come back in ten days, I’ve made a hash of the crotch.” Good, can’t be helped, a snug crotch is always a teaser. Ten days later.

[
Tailor’s voice.
]

“Dreadfully sorry, come back in a fortnight, I’ve made a balls of the fly.” Good, at a pinch, a smart fly is a stiff proposition.

[
Pause. Normal voice.
]

I never told it worse.

[
Pause. Gloomy.
]

I tell this story worse and worse.

[
Pause. Raconteur’s voice.
]

Well, to make it short, the bluebells are blowing and he ballockses the buttonholes.

[
Customer’s voice.
]

“God damn you to hell, Sir, no, it’s indecent, there are limits! In six days, do you hear me, six days, God made the world. Yes Sir, no less Sir, the WORLD! And you are not bloody well capable of making me a pair of trousers in three months!”

[
Tailor’s voice, scandalized.
]

“But my dear Sir, my dear Sir, look—

[
disdainful gesture, disgustedly
]

—at the world—

[
pause
]

and look—

[
loving gesture, proudly
]

—at my TROUSERS!”

[
Pause. He looks at Nell who has remained impassive, her eyes unseeing, breaks into a high forced laugh, cuts it short, pokes his head towards Nell, launches his laugh again.
]

HAMM
Silence!

[
Nagg starts, cuts short his laugh.
]

NELL
You could see down to the bottom.

HAMM
[
exasperated
] Have you not finished? Will you never finish?

[
With sudden fury.
]

Will this never finish?

[
Nagg disappears into his bin, closes the lid behind him. Nell does not move. Frenziedly.
]

My kingdom for a nightman!

[
He whistles. Enter Clov.
]

Clear away this muck! Chuck it in the sea!

[
Clov goes to bins, halts.
]

NELL
So white.

HAMM
What? What’s she blathering about?

[
Clov stoops, takes Nell’s hand, feels her pulse.
]

NELL
[
to Clov
] Desert!

[
Clov lets go her hand, pushes her back in the bin, closes the lid.
]

CLOV
[
returning to his place beside the chair
] She has no pulse.

HAMM
What was she drivelling about?

CLOV
She told me to go away, into the desert.

HAMM
Damn busybody! Is that all?

CLOV
No.

HAMM
What else?

CLOV
I didn’t understand.

HAMM
Have you bottled her?

CLOV
Yes.

HAMM
Are they both bottled?

CLOV
Yes.

HAMM
Screw down the lids.

[
Clov goes towards door.
]

Time enough.

[
Clov halts.
]

My anger subsides, I’d like to pee.

CLOV
[
with alacrity
] I’ll go and get the catheter.

[
He goes towards door.
]

HAMM
Time enough.

[
Clov halts.
]

Give me my pain-killer.

CLOV
It’s too soon.

[
Pause.
]