Don't Explain (20 page)

 As she looked into his eyes, she couldn't help but feel deeply for him
and was tempted to be selfish. She rose up on her toes, closed her eyes, and
gently kissed him on the cheek. While her eyes were closed, she remembered the
nights that they had spent together and the intimate moments they had shared
since he had first arrived. She longed for the moments so intensely that she
began moving toward his lips but pulled away shamefully in the last moment. She
unwrapped her arms from his waist and slowly moved away from him. She looked
into his eyes one last time before walking again.

“Of course you still want to go,” Alexis said.

Caitlyn looked at Alexis, who was dressed up in a sexy black dress, which
clung to the few curves that she had and that not-so-subtly accentuated her
breasts, and shiny black peep-toe pumps. She then looked down at her cotton,
gray, drawstring pants, matching hoodie, and camisole.

She smiled wearily at her friend, “I'm not in the mood, and I'm not at
all dressed for it.” She knew it was not going to go over well when she decided
to blow off her weekend plans with Alexis, but she was drained from trying to
be Michael's friend and getting to know Margaret.

“That's too damn bad because I am, and you said you would. What happened
between Wednesday and now?” Alexis snatched Caitlyn's phone out of the front
pocket of the hoodie before Caitlyn even realized what was going on. She began to
wrestle with her to try to get the phone back, but Alexis scampered to the
middle of the gravel driveway. Caitlyn looked down at her bare feet and knew
that she couldn't catch her, even though Alexis was teetering in her five-inch
heels.

Alexis started looking through the call log. “Six calls! You answered six
calls from him!” She did some more research, “You called him twice and went to
his house.” Alexis apparently found the text message she had sent saying that
she was on her way. “Get in the house. You are going out, and tonight you are
going to have crazy sex with a total stranger. We have got to get this guy out
of your system.” Alexis headed back to Caitlyn's house and pushed past her into
the living room.

“It's not that simple,” she called after her as she entered the house. “I
love him.”

“After tonight, you
loved
him. Get in your room and get ready. I'll
hold onto your phone because apparently you aren't ready for that type of
responsibility.” Alexis pointed to the bedroom and stared down Caitlyn until
she felt obligated to go change.

Caitlyn shuffled through the clothes in her closet. There was no way she
was going to have sex with a stranger tonight. If Alexis knew anything about Caitlyn,
she knew that she was not that type of girl. Caitlyn pulled a casual cotton
denim-blue dress off of a hanger. The plunging neckline should be enough to
satisfy Alexis, but the dress wouldn't be considered sexy. Cute at best.

She took off her clothes and put on the dress. She pulled her hair out of
the pony tail, wet her brush and ran it through her hair. As a final touch she
put on a layer of mascara, and then walked into the living room announcing that
she was ready to go.

Alexis looked at her and laughed. “Yeah right.” She stood up from the
couch and grabbed Caitlyn by the arm leading her back into the bedroom. She sat
her on the bed and went into the closet, returning with a champagne-colored
off-shoulder cocktail dress. It dipped slightly in the center of the collar
that would reveal a minimal amount of cleavage, but it stopped a good four
inches above her knees. “Put this on.” Alexis commanding, shoving the dress at Caitlyn.

Caitlyn laughed as she put the dress on the bed. “Try again. This was my
bridesmaid dress from Megan's wedding. I'm not wearing that to a bar.”

“Well, since you aren't taking this seriously, you don't have a choice.
It's a good thing that Megan has good taste.”

Caitlyn sighed and took the dress to the bathroom and closed the door
behind her. She slipped on the dress and took a long look in the mirror. The
dress hugged her chest beautifully and accented her creamy neckline and
shoulders. The silky fabric flared away at her hips. She was vaguely surprised
that the dress still fit. She had to agree with Alexis: Megan did have good
taste when it came to clothes. She was lucky that Megan wasn't a bridezilla who
dressed her attendants up in a horrible bulgy chiffon or tulle number in an
equally horrible color. Megan was pretty confident that she was going to be the
most beautiful person at her wedding, so she did not torture her bridesmaids.

Caitlyn walked out of the bathroom. Alexis smiled.

“Perfect. Sit down.” She had set a kitchen chair out in front of Caitlyn's
cherry dresser.

Caitlyn obeyed while Alexis went into the bathroom and grabbed a comb and
a curling iron. Caitlyn thought back to the night of Greasy Gary and quickly
became frightened that this was going to be another one of those nights. Alexis
plugged in the curling iron, and while letting it warm up, she grabbed a pair
of taupe heels from Caitlyn's closet.

Caitlyn resisted. “They have a bow. Bows aren't sexy.”

“Do you have anything else that matches?”

“No, which is why I should change.” She smoothed out her dress, failing
to get it to reach her knees.

“Not a chance. Put them on.”

Caitlyn sighed as she slipped the shoes on her feet. She wondered for a
moment if sitting in Michael's kitchen with Margaret would be more comfortable,
but she rapidly decided to stick with Alexis.

Alexis styled Caitlyn's hair with large waves and big curls framing her
face and around the bottom edge. Caitlyn insisted on doing her own makeup, and
Alexis consented as long as she could observe and Caitlyn took it seriously.
When she was done, Caitlyn looked at herself in the dresser mirror. She hardly
recognized herself. She felt sexy. Want-able. It had been a couple of weeks
since she felt that way, and she didn't remember ever feeling that way without
a man actively seducing her.

“Okay.” She looked at her friend. “I'm ready to go.”

#

Where the hell is my wing man, she thought. Caitlyn vigilantly sipped her
vodka tonic, as she looked around the room for Alexis. She apparently did her
job and then took off with someone else.

The man across from Caitlyn was repeating how beautiful she looked, and
she was purposefully ignoring him. He was sweet, but the overwhelming number of
compliments was starting to make her uncomfortable.

The man placed his hand on the inside of Caitlyn's thigh. She felt a warm
panic fill her as she looked at the stranger sitting before her. His brown eyes
looked deeply into hers, and he had a very serious expression on his face. His
chestnut hair was styled messily on the top of his head in a carefully crafted just-out-of-bed
look. A light stubble adorned his young face. He was probably ten years younger
than Caitlyn. That was the first strike against him. Caitlyn had not wanted to
hang out with college guys since college.

He held onto her thigh as he brushed back the waterfall of hair covering
Caitlyn's right eye. “So what do you think?”

She shuddered and the warmth centered itself in her stomach. “What do I
think about what?” she stammered.

“Let's get out of here.” He stood up and grabbed her free hand. “I want
to talk some place a little quieter. My apartment is just around the corner. We
can walk.”

Caitlyn looked at his broad shoulders and his masculine frame. She
noticed that he was obviously aroused and that his black trousers were doing a
poor job of concealing it. Physically, he was tempting, but he was kind of a
douche bag, and anyway, she couldn't do it. She would not have any fun. She
knew that she would only compare this guy's performance with Michael's and that
was a hell of a bar to reach even for someone so youthful.

She shook her head, and her red mane waved from side to side. “No, thanks.
I'm here with a friend. I can't just leave her.” She looked around trying to
find Alexis.

Her excuses fell on deaf ears. “I doubt that she'll mind. Didn't she say
that you needed…” he paused to figure out how to put it, “to be distracted?”

“Listen, you're trying to be sweet, but I can't do this. I just broke up
with someone.” She was throwing out any excuse to get rid of the guy, whose
name she had mysteriously overlooked, but he wasn't getting the hint.

“That's even better. I bet you I can make you forget all about him.”

Doubt it. He ran his fingers down the length of her arm and grabbed her
other hand. He pulled her down from the barstool, and she was unable to balance
herself before falling into his chest. The remainder of her drink went toppling
with her and ran down the arm of his charcoal, ribbed sweater.

“I'm sorry, but you caught me a little off guard.” He was really starting
to get on her nerves.

He gave her a sideways smile, “See, now we have to go back to my place so
that I can take off my shirt.” The garish line swept away any remaining desire
she had to be with this guy.

“No.” She was firm and direct this time. “I don't sleep with random
college guys from bars.”

He stopped smiling, “You could have told me that from the beginning. Now
I've wasted half the night and have to go home and change.” The young guy began
walking away. She heard him curse her under his breath.

“Whatever,” Caitlyn pulled out her phone. She had managed to convince
Alexis that she would need it to call for a ride in the morning. It was the
only thing that would convince her. She pulled up Alexis's number, but it went
straight to voicemail. She had turned off her phone.

Caitlyn took a quick survey of the bar and then the parking lot, but
Alexis was not in either place. What was she supposed to do now? Alexis had
insisted on driving, and now Caitlyn was stuck in Fitchburg.

She called Alexis's phone again. “What did you tell that guy? Are you out
of your mind? Now, I am stuck here. You’re nowhere to be found, and I don't
have a ride. Great night. Thanks.”

She browsed her phonebook. Most of her friends had kids, and she was not
about to call a cousin. Her family couldn't keep their mouths shut. It would
certainly get back to her mother that so-and-so picked her up at a college bar
in the middle of the night. She didn't want to deal with that torture. She typed
out a quick a text message. “Are you still awake?”

She wrapped her arms around her waist in an attempt to keep herself warm.

Her phone rang in her hand, and she quickly picked up. “
Bonjour, mon
ami
,” she said with a slight sarcasm, “I need a favor.”

Michael's voice filled the receiver and renewed a warmth inside of her, “What
can I do for you?”

#

Twenty minutes later Michael's pulled up in his crimson coupe. He lowered
the passenger side window. He admired her hungrily and immediately wanted her.
He envied the guys in the bar, the ones who had a chance with her that night,
and wondered why she was leaving with him instead of one of them. He was happy
that she had been unsuccessful. He invited her into the car with a wave, and
she quickly climbed in.

“Sorry. I really had no one else I could call.”

He wondered if that was true or if this was her little revenge. If it
was, it was an excellent way to make him feel apologetic.

“What happened to your ride?”

“Good question. It appears that she has vaporized.” She let slip a
giggle. It reminded him of the laughing fits she would have after she orgasmed.
Even his breath against her skin would tickle her, and she would giggle
uncontrollably for five minutes.

Michael watched as Caitlyn rolled the hem of her dress between her
fingers as the rode silently back to Maple Field. He hated that he made her
nervous or that she was uncomfortable around him at all. He only knew one way
to make her really relax, and that was not an option. It was difficult for him not
to imagine pulling the car over and consuming all she had to offer. He imagined
Caitlyn removing her panties and straddling him in the driver's seat, but the
image of Margaret sitting on the bathroom floor vomiting quickly brought his
thoughts back to something more innocent. He felt his chest tighten, and he was
ashamed of himself.

Caitlyn rose from the car as she thanked Michael for the ride. He watched
her walk away greedily taking her in with his eyes. “Hey!” he shouted at her. She
turned and leaned into the window. “You should come over tomorrow. We'll have a
barbeque.” Caitlyn twisted her mouth in consideration. He could tell by the way
she was moving her lips that she was trying to find an excuse to say no. As she
was about to reject his request, he added, “Bring Alexis, if you want.”

She was silent for a moment, but then slowly said, “Okay. We'll be there.”

He watched her until she closed the door behind her.

Damn it, he thought. He needed to start trying a little harder to enjoy
Margaret and not Caitlyn.

 “I can't believe you called him again.” Alexis was incredibly upset with
Caitlyn for agreeing to go to the barbeque, and she had no trouble voicing her
opinion about it. Caitlyn was berated the entire drive to Michael's house.