Distorted Hope (28 page)

I giggled. “Let me pee first.” I ran into the bathroom and did my business and then peeked my head out of the bathroom, looking for Nathan. I frowned when I didn’t see him and stepped out further into the room.

“Gotcha!” he yelled from behind me. I shrieked and tried to get away, but his arms were so long! I giggled and screamed as he carried me over to the bed and put me on his lap, his legs spread enough to not press against my belly.

“How many swats does my bad little kitten deserve this morning?” He chuckled and I held my breath in anticipation.

When he didn’t swat me, I moaned and he chuckled. “Bad kitten,” he teased and smacked my rear. I yelped and then squeezed my thighs together.

It amazed both of us to find I liked the kinky stuff. We’d been experimenting the last month or so with nipple clamps and a flogger. Oh, how they turned me on! Nathan suspected it could be a quirk of pregnancy, but he wasn’t going to complain and hoped it continued after I had Hope.

By the time he’d counted to twenty, I was so wet and aroused I couldn’t stand it, and I started begging. That always made him chuckle.

He pinched my clit and I gasped. It was so sensitive. I think if he did that a few more times, I might come from it.

“Maybe we should see about a clamp here,” he said, pinching me again.

I could only moan in reply. He began slowly circling my clit again. “Please!” I begged. “Please, Nathan.”

“Please what?”

“Please, I want to come. I
need
to come!”

I heard his growl and knew he’d let me this time. Nathan held my upper body down as his fingers moved faster and faster until my body stiffened and I screamed out my pleasure. He held me so I couldn’t move and it seemed to prolong the waves.

I panted as my heartbeat returned to normal, then he helped me into a standing position. I felt a little dizzy but gave him a lazy smile. “That was a good one.”

He grinned. “Sounded like it. You like me holding you down when you come?”

I grinned and nodded, making him laugh, and then stepped forward to wrap my hands around his throbbing cock. “I want more.”

“Insatiable little minx,” he growled with a sparkle in his eye and pulled me onto the bed.

Later, as I sat in the jet on the way to Panama City, I felt another twinge. This time it hurt and I cried out in pain and surprise.

Nathan was instantly at my side. “What’s wrong, Kitten?”

“I don’t know. It— Ouch!” I grabbed my stomach and closed my eyes. “It hurts,” I whispered after a minute.

“Luís!” Nathan yelled.

Dr. Perez had come with us so he could find out why I’d been so tired the last few days. He wanted to do some blood work to make sure I had enough iron, or something like that.

“Luís!” Nathan yelled again.

I winced as I felt another painful twinge.

“What’s wrong,
querida
?”

“She says it hurts,” Nathan said in an impatient voice. “What’s going on?”

Dr. Perez put his hand on my stomach. “Try to relax, Kyra.”

Easy for him to say.
Nathan moved behind me so I could lean back against him and put my feet up on the bench seat. I closed my eyes and tried to relax, but another pain came and I grimaced.

“What’s going on, Luís?” Nathan demanded.

“I don’t know, Nathan,” Dr. Perez snapped.

Another pain came, this time much harder and I cried out in pain.

“We need to get her to the hospital,” Dr. Perez said.

Nathan cursed. “Mark!” Mark appeared a moment later. “I need a helicopter at the airport when we arrive. I don’t care how much it costs. Just get it there.”

Nathan usually had the plane fly around a bit before landing, to hide where we’re coming from, I guess. But I felt the plane tip to one side and begin to lose altitude.

I was holding Nathan’s hand so hard, if he hadn’t been such a strong man, I might have broken it. He leaned his head against mine, whispering to me in a broken voice that everything would be okay. He was so worried. I hated I was making him worry like this.

“Argh!” I cried as the worst pain I’d felt yet hit my stomach. It felt like the worst menstrual cramps ever.

I felt something wet between my legs and then got lightheaded as the plane dipped down to the ground. I heard Nathan’s voice echoing in my ears, but I couldn’t respond. Everything was getting blurry and fuzzy…

An annoying beeping sound was pulling me out of my peaceful sleep. I didn’t like it; I wished it would stop. I groaned and tried to move, but I felt something poking my arm and holding me in place.

“Kyra?”

I knew that voice.

I opened my eyes slowly and saw Nathan sitting next to me, holding my hand. A look of relief filled his face as I blinked several times and looked around. “Where am I?” The walls were white, the ceiling was white, the floor was white. Even the blanket on top of me was white.

“The hospital. Do you remember what happened?”

I turned my head and looked at Nathan again. He looked so sad.
Why was he sad?
I was very tired, but I tried to recall the last thing I remembered. “We were on the jet and I was having pains in my stomach…” I trailed off and my eyes widened. “Hope?” I whispered.

Nathan’s face darkened with grief. “We lost her, Kyra,” he said in a broken voice. “She was gone before we got here. Luís checked for a heartbeat as soon as we got here, and it was gone.”

I looked down at my stomach, now much flatter than it had been. “Oh.” It was all I could say. Then the tears started falling. Nathan moved so he could hold me as best he could with me being attached to the machines by various tubes and wires.

I wept for an eternity and was surprised when I felt tears on my arms that weren’t mine. Nathan was crying. That just made me cry harder. We clung to each other in our grief. I didn’t know what to think or do. All I could do was cry. And cry. And cry.

When my tears subsided, Nathan sat back in the chair next to my bed. The sky outside the window was dark. “How long have I been here?”

“Since yesterday morning. Luís was afraid we’d lose you, too. You’d lost so much blood… Just before you passed out on the jet, you started hemorrhaging.” He grimaced.

“Why?” I whispered. “Why did we lose her?”

“Luís said it just happens sometimes, but he’s afraid it might have been the IUD.”

I closed my eyes. “I thought everything was okay after we took it out.”

“It was still a risk, but it could have been any number of things.” His face darkened more. “I might have been too rough on you before we left.”

“Oh, Nathan! No. I’m sure it wasn’t that. How could it have been? We’ve done it plenty of times before then. Besides,” I shook my head. “I’d been having weird twinges for a couple of days.”

Nathan’s face turned stony. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you were with guests. I didn’t want to upset you.”

He frowned. “You should have told me.”

“Nathan, they weren’t bad. Nothing like what happened on the plane. They were more annoying than painful.”

“You should have at least told Mark.”

“I’m sorry, Nathan,” I whispered. I didn’t want him to be angry with me. “I was trying to do the right thing. I knew if you were worried about me, it would affect your… meetings. And then they stopped. I didn’t have them for a day and a half.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I know, Kitten. I’m sorry I got upset. You’re right. It would have worried me and affected negotiations.” He squeezed my hand.

Dr. Perez came in a few minutes later with his usual, kind smile, though his face, too, was sad. He looked at Nathan with concern and then looked back at me. “How are you,
querida
?”

“Okay.”

“Did you tell her?” Dr. Perez asked, looking for and receiving Nathan’s affirmative nod. Dr. Perez walked over and studied the machines. “Are you feeling alright? Physically, I mean.”

I nodded. I really wasn’t feeling anything bad. I felt kind of empty, but no pain.

“No pain?”

“Only in my heart.”

Dr. Perez’s eyes were very sympathetic. “I know,
querida
. I’m so sorry.” His gaze flickered to Nathan, which made me wonder how Nathan had been doing. The concern on the doctor’s face every time he looked at Nathan worried me.

Nathan was very subdued all evening. He stayed by my side, holding my hand, but didn’t speak much. I was worried about him. Mark came by shortly after I woke up and insisted on Nathan getting up and going for a walk. Just a short one.

“How’s he doing?” I asked after Nathan left the room.

Mark grimaced and shook his head. “I honestly don’t know. He’s been really quiet.” He chuckled. “Well, after things settled down, he got quiet. When we first got here, I swear people two blocks away could have heard him yelling. He didn’t think the helicopter pilot was flying fast enough, the doctors weren’t doing enough. When they took you in for surgery, Bryce and I had to physically hold him back from storming in after you.” Mark laughed softly. “He’s a rather determined man.”

I allowed myself a smile. “You think?” I sobered quickly. “Will he be okay?”

“I’m sure he will be. If he’d lost you… I don’t know. But you’re still here. There will be chances for other babies. If you guys want.”

Tears came to my eyes again. “I was so looking forward to seeing the happiness on his face when Hope was born,” I whispered.

Mark squeezed my hand. “I know, Kyra. It will be okay. It’ll work out.”

When I woke up the next morning, Nathan was lying on the small couch under the window. Well, kind of lying. He made the couch look like a child’s toy, but he was asleep and snoring softly. I turned on my side and watched him sleep. His face was peaceful. I hoped I would see it that way soon when he was awake.

As crushed as my heart felt by my own grief, I think I was more worried about Nathan’s grief. Baby Hope had given him hope. Would he lose it now?

Nathan jumped suddenly and almost fell off the couch. His eyes were wide, as if he were trying to figure out where he was. When he caught sight of me, he visibly relaxed.

“Good morning,” I said quietly.

His eyes turned tender. “Good morning, Kitten. How are you feeling?”

“Okay.”

He walked over to sit in the bedside chair and took my hand. “You were asleep when I got back last night.” I thought I detected a twinge of guilt in his voice.