Dirty Crown: A Bad Boy Secret Baby Royal Romance (with BONUS book - Rebel Rockstar!) (8 page)

“It’s Edward Leighton – the prince of England.”

“You’re kidding me!” She screams, looking at me disbelievingly.

“That’s just…”

“Insane, I know, but I didn’t know who he was right away, and we have loads in common.”

I smile sadly to myself, remembering that fateful day, the one where I thought my entire life was being written in the best way possible. It was as if fate had intervened and had brought him to me.

“We just… we fell in love and we got married on a whim.”

“Wait,” she stops me, holding her hands up in a halting motion.

“You were married? You never told me that!”

“It didn’t last long. Not even twenty four hours, and I don’t think it really stuck long enough to be classed as a legal marriage.”

Now that I’m really thinking about it, my life sounds really exciting, but aside from that one short period it’s really truly been very boring.

“I freaked out and I left, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t love him… even now.”

Saying it aloud makes it even more real, and I cannot help bursting into sobbing tears. It all becomes too much for me and I completely let the emotion consume me.

This is utterly devastating, and it’s finally truly hitting that I lost the man I love and that I can never get that back.

Kelly hugs me, wrapping me up in her friendship and I collapse against her for a few moments.

“It’ll be okay,” she tries her best to reassure me.

“I know that it’s hard now, but it will get easier, I can promise you that. Time is an excellent healer.”

I nod, trying to act like I’m agreeing with her, but if it hasn’t healed over seven years, then I can’t see that it’s going to now.

“Does he… I mean, does he have any feelings for you still?”

“I don’t know,” I admit, leaning back to look at her.

“We didn’t discuss it, and I really don’t know if we’re going to. He’s here for Lily…”

But is he?

I can’t deny that he didn’t know about Lily when he came here, so he can’t solely be here for her. Sure, it might become that now, but there was something that he came here for, and I don’t want to get my hopes up too high, but I really feel like it might have been me.

“Well maybe it’s best if you focus on their relationship first, then worry about you and him,” Kelly tells me, sounding wiser than I feel myself.

“I mean, you can’t make him love you and you don’t want to jeopardize what he could have with her.”

“No, you’re right I don’t want that at all. It’s just going to be hard.”

“Girl, I don’t know anyone that’s as strong as you are,” I’ve confided in her about a lot of my life, and since she has a tight knit loving family around her, she’s never been able to understand how I’m still standing.

“You’ve gotten through worse. You can get through this.”

“Okay,” I take in some deep breaths, calming down. “Thank you.”

“Do you want me to stay with you a little bit?” She offers, but I turn her down knowing that she has classes to get to.

“Thank you, but I’ll be fine. I actually feel a lot better.” I nod, sending her a weak smile.

“Thank you for being there for me, you really are a great friend.”

As she walks out of the door, I sit next to my daughter on the sofa, pulling her in for a deep hug. If anyone can make me feel better, it’s Lily, and I’m more than content to snuggle with her, losing myself in the cartoon that’s playing out on the TV screen.

It’ll all be okay in the end,
I tell myself.
I just need to be strong, to get through this.

I
practically skip back
to the hotel, feeling on cloud nine. I can’t believe how well that went. Sure, there were some sticky moments back then during my meeting with Faith – especially when she told me why she left me in a way that really didn’t really make much sense – but all in all I feel like it went really well.

Overall, it feels like a positive.

I’m going to get to see Lily, to spend some time with her, and that’s the most important thing of all. Faith really could have made things difficult for me but luckily, she isn’t like that.

She’s still just as wonderful as she was back then, I just hope that eventually we can overcome the weirdness between us. It is uncomfortable, not being the way that we once were, but I’m confident that won’t last forever.

As I step back into my hotel room, I instantly notice the room phone ringing, which can only mean one thing – mother is calling. She’s the only one who refuses to use my cell phone, just to be particularly difficult.

I don’t care though, not today, I’m far too happy to be bothered by her little petty techniques.

“Hello?” I answer in a singsong voice into the receiver.

“Mum?”

“Are you okay?” She sounds panicked, which makes me roll my eyes.

I’m sure this is just another control thing, which I really don’t like.

“I haven’t been able to get ahold of you all day.”

“Call my cell phone mum, then you’ll get me when I’m out and about too.”

She knows that, I know that she’s just trying to wind me up, and I’m doing all that I can not to rise to that. She wants a reaction, and I really don’t want to give it to her.

“Where have you been?” She asks suspiciously, and the excitement rises up inside of me once more. I can’t help but tell her the truth; I want her to know that the mystery that’s been haunting me for years has finally been solved.

I’m sure that she will be over the moon for me to have some of the answers that I’ve always needed.

“Actually,” I start smugly.

“I ran into someone today – someone that I never expected to see.”

“Who?” I can already hear that she’s getting stressed, for which she has no reason to. This is good news, and she’ll see that soon enough.

“Faith Harper,” I announce with clarity, my heart racing all over again.

There is still something about this woman, something that draws me in and sends my body wild with excitement. Even now, even after all we’ve been through.

“What?” She gasps, not even trying to disguise her shock.

“Are you serious?”

“Totally,” I nod vigorously to myself.

“And that’s not all. She has a daughter.”

There is a resounding silence, which proves to me that I need to explain myself further. I realize that I haven’t actually told her anything that makes any sense.

“Her name is Lily… and she’s mine. She’s my daughter mum, and she’s lovely.”

“She isn’t,” she immediately snaps back.

“She can’t be. Your marriage was annulled on the fact that you didn’t… consummate.”

“No,” I feel my face heat up, having to discuss this with my mother. It’s embarrassing!

“But we did… before we got married.”

“You shouldn’t be so naïve,” she sounds furious now, which really upsets me.

How can she be acting this way about the news that had me on top of the world only moments before?

“This woman abandoned you on your wedding night, now she’s randomly come back with a child in tow?”

I don’t like to say that I actually went looking for Faith, so I stay silent, just waiting for her to finish her rant.

“No, you need to do a paternity test before you even think about seeing this child again!”

“But I don’t…” I trail off feebly, knowing that there isn’t any argument that I can give mother that she will go for.

Once her mind is made up, that’s it. She’s very stubborn like that.

“You just need to look at her to see that she’s mine.”

“You’re just seeing what you want to see,” she replies dismissively.

“You need to remember who you are and what you have at your disposal.”

How do I explain that Faith isn’t like that? That she has never expressed any interest in my title or my money even when she really could have?

I think that deep down mum knows that she’s wrong, she’s just allowing her preconceived notions about ‘commoners’ to taint her opinion.

“Anyway, we have no time to be worrying about Faith Harper,” she continues, with something different in her tone this time.

“I have arranged a meeting for you with Kristine Larson, so I need that to happen while you are over in the same country as her.”

“The Norwegian princess?” I ask warily, already knowing of her reputation.

“She’s in America?”

“Yes. I will send you all the details of your meeting,” she says as if that’s case closed, as if my opinion doesn’t even matter.

She’s always been like this, and it normally works because I can’t be bothered to argue, but this time is different. I have too much at stake now.

“But mum, I don’t want to meet her, she’s supposed to be horrible.”

I’ve heard that she’s really manipulative and nasty, and that’s the last thing in the world that I need in my life.

“I don’t want to meet her, I’ve got too much on my plate now. Did you not hear what I said? You might not believe me, but I know for a fact that Lily is mine and I want to be around to spend some time with her.”

“Edward,” mum replied sounding very snippy now.

“You need to start thinking about getting married to someone who deserves you, who is of equal status. You cannot spend your whole life messing around with girls that can never be yours. You need to start getting serious. This child
isn’t
yours, and the sooner you realize that the better. Plus, even if she was, what does that matter? You can’t take a few hours out for a royal engagement?”

So many arguments flow through my mind, but I know that it’s pointless to voice them. I will end up meeting this girl whether I want to or not, but I definitely won’t end up marrying her. I don’t care who wants what to happen – the woman that becomes my wife is up to me.

“Okay sure,” I sigh, I’ll meet her. Just set it up.” She’s right, I can give her a few hours – even if it’s just to shut her up.

“Thank you, and I don’t want to hear mention of Faith or some kid ever again,” she finishes firmly, and I pretend to agree even though I have no intention of following through on the promise never to see her again.

Once I hang up the phone, I head straight over to my computer to look up information about Kristine Larson.

I feel like the more armed with information I am when I’m forced to meet her, the better things will go.

But after a few moments of research, I find myself distracted.

Looking up some Norwegian crazy chick is boring when I can be researching all that I’ve missed in Lily’s life. I might not have been able to be there, but I may be able to find out what her life has been like.

Faith’s online presence is minimal. It seems that she’s kept a very private life, and I wonder how much of that is my fault.

Maybe she didn’t want me to find out that way, or maybe she got a lot of online abuse because of the media storm surrounding us. I feel guilty for that, and I hope it hasn’t caused her too much pain, but at the same time I’m frustrated.

‘Will you bring some photographs of Lily growing up next time we see each other?’

I message, without even thinking. As soon as I hit send, I feel awful. Maybe Faith needs some time and space to adjust to this new situation, and I’ve gone in heavy handed…

‘Of course.’

The reply comes back quickly, sending all of my negative thoughts away. If she’s that keen to reply, that has to be a good sign right?

I try to think of the best way to reply, but nothing instantly comes to mind, so instead I sit back and allow my mind to wander. With all of this talk of wedding and
finding the right girl for me
I find myself remembering our wedding vows.

“I love you,”
I spoke to Faith, staring deep into her eyes.

We hadn't had time to write our own vows, but we wanted to speak them anyway, so we simply spoke from the heart in the most romantic way possible.

“I have loved you from the very first second that I laid eyes on you at Tintagel Castle. I love that we share so many interests, but also that you challenge me. I love that you’re beautiful, but that you don’t even seem to notice it. I love that you like me for who I am, not the titles I hold. I want to be with you forever, to have a family and a future with you. I cannot wait to call you my wife.”

And I remember her reply as if it were only yesterday. Her words meant so much to me at the time, it’s amazing to think what happened afterwards. I really wasn’t expecting it, and even to this day I don’t think that she left me for the reasons that she said. It doesn’t make any sense.

“Edward, you make me feel safe and special all at once. I don’t know how I managed to live before you came into my life, and I don’t think I could go even one day without you by my side now. You have changed me for the best and I love you for that. Us getting married might be crazy, it might be quick, but it’s right for us. I know that we will make this last forever, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us.”

It just doesn’t make any sense that we would have gone from that to not speaking for years. I think that I’m missing something, somewhere along the line and I really want to know what.

But I can’t solve the mystery until Faith is ready to open up to me, and I’ll just have to hope that she does so before my ‘date’ with Princess Kristine. I have a feeling that she will get between us, if she really is like what everyone says she is, and I need to know the truth first.

I think that after everything I’ve been through, I deserve at least that much. I’ve already missed out on so much of my daughter’s life, it doesn’t seem fair that I don’t get to know the truth of that.

And as for mum’s suggestion that I get a paternity test for Lily, I will completely ignore that. I only have to look at her to know that she’s mine.

As I lie down on the bed, I start to imagine how our life
could
have gone if Faith hadn't run away, starting with our wedding night…

* * *

“
I
love you
, Mrs. Leighton.” I say to her.

“I love you too, my darling husband,” she pants against me, making me feel whole all over again. I’ve never felt so right as I do with Faith, and it’s nice to have that back again – even if I am aware in the back of my mind that this isn’t exactly real.

I feel a stirring in my trousers when Faith kisses me with all that passion, and I find myself unable to resist.

She’s so beautiful, so fresh, so natural, and I still love her no matter what has happened. The past just melts away in my mind as I have her in my arms all over again.

“You’re so gorgeous,” I whisper to her, hoping that somehow my telepathic message is really getting through to her.

Her hands start to work their way up my body, rapidly tugging my T-shirt over my head.

There’s a needy look in her eyes, one that’s desperate to devour me.

I’ve missed that look so much that I never want it to leave her face. I step back and look at her for a few seconds, just committing her to memory before moving back in for more kissing.

I pull up her sweet navy blue dress, wanting to see that curvy body again, and as it sheds from her skin, revealing that she has no underwear on, it takes all that I have not to fall apart there and then. I groan a guttural sound, and I almost collapse against her.

I run my hands down her body, while she tugs off my trousers and underwear in a frenzy. I want to take things slow, to savor the moment, but from the way she is grabbing at me I know that I won’t be able to keep things under control for long.

I lie her back on the bed that seems to have magically appeared behind her, and I shift myself down her body, desperate to explore that sweet, hot desire that’s radiating off her. As my mouth gets nearer to her desire, she tosses her head back and pleasure, and grips tightly to the sheets beneath her.

I nudge her legs apart with my nose, and I begin to explore her thoroughly with my tongue. As I flickered over her clit, she buckled beneath me, going wild and I love seeing her that way – that total loss of control is the sexiest thing ever.

I quickly realize that I can’t take it any longer, so I move up her body and I tease her entrance, trying to see how badly she wants me. She panting, breathless, and pushing against me, which gives me all that I need to know, and I slip inside.

We thrust hard against one another, giving in to the passion that we’ve kept inside for far too long. I know this isn’t our wedding night, and it’s seven years later, so this encounter has gone from sweet and romantic, to passionate and desperate. Everything that we’ve been forced not to express comes out, and soon we are yelling and crumbling and clinging on to one another for dear life.