Diary of an Expat in Singapore (37 page)

And the fact that, unlike a phone call, you actually need to get dressed to Skype, doesn’t make it any more attractive. But most importantly, you can’t smell your mother’s delicious pasta sauce over Skype, let alone eat it.

You check air fares online. Obsessively.

Just because you’re not going anywhere doesn’t mean you shouldn’t find out how much it would cost to get you there. Sorry if that makes no sense, I majored in philosophy.

You dream about the apricot-filled croissants at your favourite cafe.

I recently rewatched ‘Nuovo Cinema Paradiso’, a movie I first saw years ago as a college student. At that time, I was eager to explore the world beyond the medieval walls of Verona. But as I watched the movie now, I was surprised at how different I felt and how relevant to expats the themes were. The film, about a very successful director who looks back on his childhood, takes place in Bagheria, Sicily, the same hometown of the film’s director, Giuseppe Tornatore. It’s not a huge leap of the imagination to assume some details are biographical and to understand how difficult it must have been for the young Tornatore to leave Sicily. It is very touching and poignant when the protagonist remembers how his friend Alfredo (the movie house projectionist) sends him off at the train station. He admonishes: “Never come back here, forget about us, and most importantly…
non farti fregare dalla nostalgia
(don’t let nostalgia fool you).”

I think how relevant Alfredo’s words are for me, for my friends here in Singapore, for expats everywhere. How we must stifle those often idealized childhood memories to keep homesickness at bay… especially if they are filled with apricot jam.

Your valises are at the door… a week before your departure.

My husband claims that this is just me (and the kids) but I’ve visited many expat friends’ houses before their departures and doubt those huge valises by the door are part of the decor.

You need to buy a sweater. It’s for the plane.

The rush of adrenaline and excitement after booking plane tickets is the expat’s drug of choice. It is time to go shopping: not for bikinis and sarongs, but for sweaters. And don’t forget long pants and socks… that flight from Singapore can be long. Packing for the flight might not be so glamorous, but you will be thankful.

You buy all the jade charms available in Singapore.

If you’re coming from Singapore, people are expecting jade. They are thinking bracelets and necklaces, but after visiting shops you quickly realize that just because you live in Singapore does not mean jade is free. Once you add up how many presents you need to buy, you settle on the cute little charms depicting zodiac signs. Cultural
and
thrifty.

You buy many tins of Tiger Balm.

Many years ago, I received a tiny tin of Tiger Balm from a friend returning from a trip to Southeast Asia. She mentioned buying it in Singapore. I thought it was the most exotic present ever. And that was before I discovered it was the only thing that would relieve the neuralgia pain on my cheek caused by an inflamed nerve.

You remember you brought jade charms and Tiger Balm tins last year. And possibly the year before.

Although Tiger Balm is undoubtedly awesome and a welcome gift, when you notice that the medicine cabinet of the relatives you are visiting is full of it… you might want to bring something else. The same rule applies to jade charms. When the butcher, the hairdresser, and all your friends (and their children) have jade charms you gave them over the years already hanging from their key chains, it is time to go shopping for something new.

You head to Chinatown.

The one thing you will be sure to find in lacquer land – I mean Chinatown – are tourists. Some complain that this neighbourhood is actually the least authentic thing you will find in Singapore. What you will find are lacquer chopsticks. Tons of them. There are still some original pharmacies selling herbal medicines, rejuvenating teas, special tonics, and most importantly, fridge magnets.

You wonder whether they’ll like the Merlion magnets you bought.

The Merlion is a mythical creature with the head of a lion and the body of a fish, symbolizing Singapore. The fish body represents the city’s historical past as a fishing village and the head represents the original name
Singapura –
‘lion city’. But a fridge magnet… really? Do not expect gratitude.