Diamonds and Dust (Lonesome Point, Texas) (17 page)

“Me too” Tulsi whispered. “I love you, Pike.”

“I love you, too,” Pike said, his eyes sliding closed. He was out like a light, moments later.

He slept hard, dreaming of a future with Tulsi and another sweet little girl with her blond curls and his eyes. By the next day, he had nearly forgotten about the strained moment when he offered to adopt Clem or his brief suspicion that Tulsi was keeping something important from him.

He would only remember when the truth finally came out at five thirty the following evening and his entire world was turned upside down.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Tulsi

It was Mia’s big day, but Tulsi couldn’t help feeling like the luckiest woman in Texas.

As she walked down the aisle, with the afternoon sun warm on her face and a gentle breeze setting the wind chimes in the trees to tinkling, filling the air with fairy music, she felt so full of joy, hope, and gratitude she wouldn’t have been surprised to find her boots floating off the lavender carpet spread out on top of the trail. The weather was beautiful, the chairs on either side of the aisle were filled with friends and family, and the love of her life was starting down the aisle behind her.

Pretty soon she and Pike would be standing side by side as Mia’s maid and man of honor, watching two people they loved promise their lives and hearts to each other. And someday, not too far from now, she and Pike would be doing the same. They were going to have their happily ever after, with enough love in it to make up for all the hard years apart. Tulsi could see the beautiful years stretching out in front of them, filled with more sweet babies, trail rides on Pike’s ranch, family holidays and celebrations, and long nights together spent learning how to drive each other even more wild than they did already.

Tulsi reached the end of the aisle and took her place next to her friend Bubba—Mia’s other “bridesmaid”—and turned around, meeting Pike’s gaze as he walked slowly down the aisle, her heart skipping a beat as memories of last night danced through her head.

Making love with Pike was even better than it had been when they were younger, but she’d enjoyed this morning—crowding into the bathroom with him as they got ready for the day, feeling Pike’s fingertips linger on her shoulders as he zipped her into her strapless dress with the lavender bow at the waist—almost as much. Every simple intimacy was a miracle, every shared experience a memory she knew she would treasure forever. And as Pike took his place beside her and looked down at her with a loving smile so transparent she knew they must be giving themselves away, Tulsi couldn’t bring herself to care.

Let the whole world think they were crazy for jumping back into love head first, all she knew was that she was where she was supposed to be. She was by Pike’s side and she didn’t plan to leave it until death did them part. They would get around to saying their wedding vows, but in all the ways that mattered, she already belonged to him. She’d promised herself to Pike Sherman a long time ago, during that spring when loving him had changed the landscape of her heart forever.

She reached out, capturing his hand and holding tight as the bluegrass quartet began to play and Clementine appeared at the end of the aisle, drawing a collective “aw” from the witnesses. In her white flower girl dress with the lavender flowers spilling down the front and more lavender flowers in her blond curls, Clem looked like an angel. And the solemn expression on her face, as she set a slow, deliberate pace down the aisle, tossing equal handfuls of white rose petals with every other step, was so sweet Tulsi couldn’t keep tears from filling her eyes.

“I told you you’d need this before the vows,” Pike whispered, fetching his handkerchief from the pocket of his tuxedo shirt and pressing it into her hand. “That’s one beautiful little girl.”

“She is,” Tulsi said, smiling through her tears as she dabbed discreetly at her eyes.

“Just like her mama.” Pike squeezed her hand and Tulsi’s smile widened.

She was so lucky, so truly blessed. She’d been reunited with a man who loved her as madly as she loved him, she had a sweet, smart, healthy little girl, and pretty soon they were all going to be a family. She was so happy that she could only laugh when Clementine disobeyed her express orders not to deviate from the walk they’d practiced, for a solid thirty minutes before the ceremony started, and turned to perform a dramatic curtsey at the end of the aisle. A wave of laughter swept through the crowd, and Clem earned herself a brief round of applause that had her beaming as she took her seat in the front row by Mia’s mother.

Clementine grinned up at Tulsi and gave her a thumbs up. Tulsi gave her a wink and a thumbs up in return. Moments later, Mia and her father started down the aisle.

The rest of the ceremony was every bit as perfect. Mia was beautiful in an antique lace dress that ended just below the knee paired with her gray and lavender boots. And the look on her face as she promised to love, honor, and cherish Sawyer forever brought a fresh batch of tears to Tulsi’s eyes. The love Mia felt for her soon-to-be husband made her even more stunning.

It was a moving reminder that love was patient and kind, but it was also magical, a transformative force that planted seeds of hope and faith wherever it went. By the time Sawyer was given permission to kiss his bride, Tulsi was a blubbery mess, but she didn’t care. Her tears were happy tears, and she knew Pike would always think she was beautiful—even with her nose all red and her eyes swollen and puffy.

“You need another one of these, Tulsi?” Bubba held out his handkerchief as Mia and Sawyer turned to walk back down the aisle hand in hand, while the bluegrass band played “I’ll Fly Away” and their friends and family got to their feet to applaud.

“Yes, thank you.” Tulsi wadded Pike’s already soaked handkerchief in her hand and put Bubba’s to use mopping up the rest of her damp face.

Bubba patted her back with a chuckle. “Poor thing, you’re too tender-hearted for weddings.”

“It was just so beautiful,” Tulsi said, fighting another sudden wave of emotion. “I’m sorry you guys got stuck by the weeper.”

“Don’t you dare apologize.” Pike pulled her in for a hard hug that immediately made her feel a hundred times better. “I loved being by the weeper.”

“Me too,” Bubba assured her. “I might have even cried a little myself.”

“You totally did. I saw your eyes shining!” Marisol, Bubba’s fiancée, appeared beside him in a flurry of long silky brown hair and coral chiffon, wrapping her arms around his neck as she pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You big softie. Are you going to cry at our wedding?”

Bubba grunted, but he was clearly fighting a smile. “A manly tear or two might be shed. But they’ll be manly tears. That’s a whole different thing.”

“Right,” Marisol said with a wink in Tulsi’s direction. “You want to come to the bathroom with me and I’ll fix your makeup?”

“That would be amazing,” Tulsi said just as Clementine ran up to grab her hand.

“Come on, Mama,” Clem said, jumping up and down as she tugged at Tulsi’s arm. “They’re putting out the buffalo wings! I can smell them from here!”

“Me too,” Pike agreed. “They smell amazing.”

“They’re my favorite,” Clementine said. “I’m going to eat a hundred.”

“I think nine or ten will be more than enough.” Tulsi rolled her eyes with a laugh. “Why don’t you come to the bathroom with Marisol and me first. Then we’ll go get you a bib and some wings.”

Clem frowned. “Bibs are for babies and my stomach is already growling. I’m probably going to have a hole in my guts if I don’t get some wings in there soon.”

“That sounds serious,” Pike said, touching his hand lightly to Tulsi’s back. “Why don’t I take Clem to get wings and we’ll meet you at the tables by the dance floor?”

Tulsi blinked. “Oh, well—”

“That’s a great idea, Mr. Pike!” Clem dropped Tulsi’s hand and snatched up Pike’s.

By the time Tulsi pulled herself together and called after them for Clem to be on her best behavior, they were already halfway down the aisle. Tulsi watched them go, hand in hand, refusing to let the fear still lingering at the back of her mind take root. She didn’t have to be afraid of Pike and Clem spending time together. It was natural that the sight of something she’d feared for so long would cause her anxiety, but there was no need for anxiety anymore. Everything was going to be okay and it was wonderful that Pike and Clem seemed to be hitting it off.

“We’ll see you in a few,” Marisol said, kissing Bubba one last time before she and Tulsi started toward the house to find an empty bathroom. They were barely out of earshot, however, when Marisol jabbed Tulsi lightly in the ribs and asked, “So how long have you and Mr. Baseball been banging?”

Tulsi’s eyes flew wide as she glanced over her shoulder, but Bubba didn’t seem to have heard. “Is it that obvious?” Tulsi hissed as she turned back to Marisol. “We’re trying to keep it a secret until after the wedding.”

Marisol lifted one brow. “Well, I guess if someone were blind they might have missed all the loaded looks and hand-holding during the wedding…”

Tulsi fought a smile. “We’re both just too happy to hide it, I guess.”

“You shouldn’t hide it!” Marisol put her arm around Tulsi’s shoulders and gave her an excited squeeze. “I’m so happy for you. You deserve a man who can’t keep his hands off of you, but I have to admit I’m curious. Is Pike the bad boy you were talking about last time I was in town? The one you had the history with?”

Tulsi sighed, her smile fading. “Yes, but nothing is the way I thought it was. Pike’s wonderful. We just… We both made a lot of mistakes when we were younger. But we’re putting all of that behind us and moving on with a fresh slate.”

“Sounds smart,” Marisol said as they climbed the steps to Mia’s parents’ house. “That’s the only way to do it, just leave all the bullshit in the past and move on.”

“That’s what Pike says.” Tulsi held the door and followed Marisol inside the empty great room of the Sherman home. Everyone else was on their way to the tents set up next to the house, where Mia and Sawyer were holding their reception, and the house was so quiet Tulsi swore she could hear the ghosts of her and Mia’s younger selves talking about what toys they were going to play with next.

“But you don’t agree with him?” Marisol asked, glancing over her shoulder.

“No, I do,” Tulsi said. “I’m just having a harder time with it than he is I think.”

Marisol stepped into the bathroom and turned back to Tulsi with a hard look. “And why’s that? Don’t you think you deserve a fresh start? I certainly think you do.”

Tulsi lifted one shoulder and looked up at the ceiling, fighting the urge to spill her guts. The fact that Marisol was a new friend and not firmly entrenched in the old drama made her easy to talk to, but if Tulsi wasn’t going to tell Pike the truth she couldn’t tell anyone else. Pike was the person who deserved her honesty the most. Besides, she didn’t want to burden Marisol with a secret like this. She and Bubba might not be living in Lonesome Point, but they would be coming back to visit often and when they did they would be part of the family.

The tight-knit, closer-than-blood, Lonesome Point family of friends Tulsi had been lying to for years and would keep lying to until the day she died.

“Okay, spill it,” Marisol said, dropping the powder she’d just fished from her purse to the counter with a
thwack.

“There’s nothing to spill,” Tulsi said, forcing a weak smile. “Everything’s fine.”

“You look like you’re about to be sick.” Marisol’s voice dropped to a dramatic whisper. “Oh my God, are you pregnant?”

Tulsi’s eyes bulged. “No! I’m on the pill and we were careful and…no. Just no.” She had been on the pill and they’d been careful last time, too. But they’d still managed to get pregnant with Clem two months after their first broken condom, when they assumed they had dodged an unplanned pregnancy and were in the clear.

The thought made Tulsi’s knees go weak. She barely made it to the closed toilet seat before they buckled. She sat down hard, her clenched teeth grinding as she fought a wave of nausea.

“I’m not pregnant,” she said, taking a deep breath. “I just don’t know if I can do this.”

“Do what?” Marisol knelt on the ground beside her, laying a gentle hand on Tulsi’s knee. “You can talk to me, you know. I won’t share anything you say with Robert or anyone else if you don’t want me to.”

Tulsi pressed her lips together as she shook her head. “I can’t tell you. I can’t tell anyone. I have to forget about it and move on. Pretend it never happened.”

Marisol was quiet for a moment. “Well, I obviously don’t know what’s bothering you, Tulsi, but I do know that you’re a good, sweet person and I’m betting you don’t deserve to suffer like this.”

Tulsi shook her head again, fighting another wave of tears. “I don’t know if I’m good. I don’t know anything anymore. And I don’t know what’s right. I used to know but…I’m so confused.”

“That’s okay,” Marisol said, taking her hand. “But being confused doesn’t make you a bad person. We all make mistakes, but the people who really love us, forgive us. And it’s our job to let them, you know? Robert taught me that, that it’s as great a gift to accept forgiveness as it is to give it.”

“Bubba’s a wonderful guy,” Tulsi said with a hard sniff, refusing to start crying again.

Marisol smiled. “He is, but even he can only do so much on his own. I had to learn to embrace his forgiveness and to forgive myself. And when I did, I was amazed how much better a partner I was to him. Getting rid of all that guilt I’d been carrying around freed up the energy to love him the way he deserves.”

Tulsi nodded and took a deep breath, but didn’t speak. She didn’t know what to say or to think about how this secret was affecting her. At times, it was easy, and she barely thought about it at all. Other times, it crept up behind her like a monster in the dark and had its hands around her throat, choking the life out of her before she could do anything to stop it.

“Want me to shut up and fix your face?” Marisol asked with a crooked smile.