Delayed (25 page)

“My students are very excited to meet you,” he said afterward. They were making their way backstage as a few students roamed into the previously empty seats.
 

“I think I’m more excited than they are,” Olivia said. She felt the knot in her stomach return.
 

“You’ll do well. We posted signs around campus in case any of the non-theater majors were interested, and many where. I’d say we might have a full house tonight.”
 

She swallowed. “A full house? I didn’t think anyone would be that interested in what I have to say.”
 

He shook his head. “Many students and staff members are interested. You are someone who accomplished her dream. It’s something that few people do, and many people fail at. You are today’s source of inspiration.”
 

Mr. Choi patted her shoulder as a friend might. He handed her the portable microphone she would be using, and then they ran through the questions he planned to ask. Olivia zoned out halfway through their mini rehearsal. Had she accomplished her dream?
 

She still considered herself a novice in her career path. What was her dream? She had never thought about that either. The stage had always just been the place she had felt at ease. Memorizing lines, and singing along to the lyrics others had written, it gave her a chance to be someone else. It had never been her final goal, become an actress or fail trying. It was more like a reflex, simple and without thought.
 

They headed up on stage. The lighting made it impossible to see exactly who was in the audience, but she saw there were not many empty seats. Mr. Choi spent a few minutes running through her supposed biography. Olivia didn’t even know she had a biography. Hearing him list the plays she had been in, and the people she had worked with, it made her feel like she was listening to him talk about another person. It was almost like an out of body experience.
 

He then moved on to questions that he had. She came up with the answers as they went, people clapped, and then it came to answer audience members’ questions. That took about another hour, and every time someone would say how much they admired her work, Olivia would turn her gaze to the front of the room, where Isabel would have a huge smile waiting for her.
 

Then came time for the last unexpected bit, Mr. Choi had her participate in a bit of improvised theater. She chose audience members to come up in different rounds, and as the scenarios grew complicated the tension eased. She found herself laughing and enjoying the morning. And just as soon as it had begun it was over.
 

Mr. Choi thanked her and gave her a bag of gifts some of his students had brought for her. He asked her if she would be interested in coming to visit again in the fall for his new class of freshmen. She agreed and they went their separate ways.
 

Isabel clung on to her sleeve as they made their way out of the auditorium. “I told you, that you were famous,” she said. Her smile hadn’t ceased for the entire morning.
 

Olivia nudged her sister. “I’m not famous, ask any stranger on the street. Do you want chocolate?” She reached into the bag of gifts and handed her sister a bar of some very expensive looking berry chocolate.
 

“Olive,” someone called out. She didn’t have to turn to know who it was. She did anyways.
 

Olivia stopped walking. Isabel followed her lead and the two of them turned around at the same time.
 
Mimi gave her a half smile and s small wave.
 

“Mimi,” Olivia said.
 

It had been almost a year since the last time they had seen each other. She wrapped Nick’s sister in a hug, quick and effortless.
 

“I was heading to the dining hall and I saw a poster with a picture of you on it. I came here on an empty stomach just to see you,” Mimi said. Then she pointed her chin to Isabel. “Who’s your little fan?”
 

“That’s Isabel, my biggest fan apparently, and my little sister.”
 

Mimi tilted her head. “You have a sister. I didn’t know. She looks like you.”

Olivia looked back at Isabel who had already devoured half of the chocolate bar.
 

“How have you been? How’s school?”
 

Mimi shrugged. “As far as freshman years go, I’d say mine’s been average. How have you been?”
 

Olivia turned back. “Busy,” she said. “I have a few projects going on at the same time in New York. And then I have a play that’s going to be touring Glensford in May. I almost called your brother to invite him.”
 

“What happened to you two?” Mimi asked, directly, without a show of hesitation. Her black hair made her features seem more intimidating as she spoke.
 

“We grew apart,” Olivia said, not wanting to think about the night at the beach. She had made a choice that she regretted to that very day, but had no way of undoing anymore.
 

“Well that’s bull…” Mimi said. Her voice was soft when she said it. “You two weren’t the type of friends who just grew apart.”
 

Olivia shook her head. “It’s complicated. I don’t really like talking about it.”
 

“You two should make up. What’s with the two years of not talking to each other?”
 

“It’s not that simple. What he said and what I said…”
 

Mimi’s voice softened. “My brother was in love with you before he even realized it. And I’m not an expert on anything romantic, but by the way you’re looking at me right now, I’d say you’re curious to see if he still feels the same way.”
 

Olivia turned as Isabel called out, saying she was hungry. “I have to go. I don’t know when we can continue this conversation.”
 

Mimi held out her phone. “Give me your number. I’ll text you this afternoon. We can meet for coffee before my last class.”
 

Olivia knew she shouldn’t, but she typed her number into the phone and they said their goodbyes. Isabel didn’t seem to pick up on anything strange during lunch. Their dad showed up to pick her up shortly after. He’d let her skip a day of school without Jocelyn’s knowledge and he wanted to make sure it stayed that way.
 

Olivia stayed on the campus, waiting for the text to come. She passed the familiar route she had taken during her freshman year. She passed the paddleboats that bobbed along the lake. The place she had met Simon, and the same place Nick had consoled her after he had broken her heart.
 

Time passed by quickly as she reminisced, a sense of nostalgia overcame her.
 

I’m at the Melo’s Coffee in the center of campus.

Mimi’s text came, jolting Olivia out of her own private tour of memories. She walked over; surprised to see Nick’s sister had already ordered drinks. As soon as they sat down, she picked the conversation right where it had left off.
 

“Do you like my brother?” Mimi asked.
 

Olivia almost spit out her hot chocolate. And she found the answer slid right off her burned tongue. “I did.”
 

“Then why didn’t you tell him?”
 

She stuttered for an answer. “We wouldn’t have worked. He deserved something better than what I could offer him then. Our friendship was more important to me…”
 

“Those all sound like excuses,” Mimi said. “Pointless excuses. Give me one real reason the two of you couldn’t work out. “

“I would end up not trusting him. And we’d fight. And then we’d end up never speaking to each other again.”
 

Mimi laughed at that. “You two haven’t spoken in almost two years.”
 

The realization slapped Olivia out of her train of thought. “I’m just giving him space.”
 

Nick’s sister laughed again. “Two years isn’t space. So the only reason you’re not together is because you have a prophecy about how your relationship’s already doomed?”
 

“It’s a pattern,” Olivia found herself saying, but not believing. “Love, happiness, fighting, and then hatred. I don’t want to put Nick through that.”
 

Mimi shrugged. “You already put him through that. I’m not saying I don’t agree with you, most people end up hating the person they loved once, but you two aren’t most people. You have years of friendship to fall back on.” She sat up. “He tried to find you last year, at the performance you had the day of my graduation.”
 

“What? He was never there…”
 

“He came home without saying anything about it, but I know he went. There’s still a chance for the two of you.”
 

Olivia thought back to that night. Nick had always waited outside her performances, for everyone to leave. It had been the same night Simon had walked her home. Nick must have thought she had gotten back together with him…
 

“Where’s Nick now?” she asked, feeling the impulse to reach out to him.
 

“He’s in Shepton until May. He’ll be back for my mom’s tenth anniversary memorial.” Mimi stood, looking at her watch. “Why don’t you come to that? It’s on the twentieth. You two can mend things out then, whether it leads to a relationship or not. At least try to salvage your friendship. I have a class. Text me whenever you want.”
 

Olivia nodded, not knowing what else to say. She watched Nick’s sister walk off into the crowd of college students.
 

And then, as if it were a rock launched at her from the heavens, the thought hit her. There was no reason she couldn’t try to be with Nick. She was the only roadblock. What her dad had done, and what Simon had done, those were two different things. They didn’t change who Nick was or who she was.
 

She would go the anniversary memorial, and tell him everything.
 

29

May 20, 2014

Nick hadn’t told anyone he was bringing Joy to the memorial. It had been a last minute decision after she had asked him why he was okay with keeping things so casual between them.
 

“So, you’re going to present me as your girlfriend?” she asked.
 

Their flight had taken longer than expected and so they were already late to the ceremony.
 

He merged onto a new lane. “If that’s what you want,” he said.
 

“It’s what I want,” Joy said. “But I want it to be what you want too.”
 

They’d had the same version of the argument at least three times that day. It wasn’t what he wanted.
 

It wasn’t that he didn’t like her, but their dates, and the relationship they had together was something that had sprouted out of convenience, out of mutual loneliness. They had both agreed to keep things casual. It had been Joy’s idea. She was the one that wanted to date other guys while dating Nick.
 

“I don’t know what I want,” he managed. “Let’s just not talk about it for today.”
 

Joy sighed. “It’s simple Nick. I’m either your girlfriend or I’m not. There is no in between anymore. I’m turning twenty-eight in six months. I don’t have time to mess around.”
 

“Wasn’t our age difference the reason you wanted to keep it casual?” he asked.
 

She sighed again. “That was back then. Now every time I turn Facebook on or some other social media page, it’s pictures of people I went to high school with getting married or having babies. And here I am, dating someone who doesn’t even call me his girlfriend.”
 

“Because that’s what you wanted,” he said.
 

Nick turned the car onto the exit that led directly to the beach house. He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, thinking about the last time he had stopped himself from looking Olivia up. He’d removed her as a friend from his profile a long while back, but that didn’t keep her picture out of the newspaper or magazine interviews. Sometimes he stopped by to look over someone’s shoulder at work, when he thought he saw her picture somewhere.
 

He didn’t want to see her again. Olivia was dating Simon now.
 
She had forgiven him. Nick erased the thought from his mind. It was her life, her heart; she could have the same guy break it if she wanted to.
 

Then he processed the words Joy had said. “You were dating other guys too. Why do you want to stick to just me now?”
 

She shrugged. “You’re one of the nice ones.”
 

He was one of the nice ones.
No he wasn’t. Nick didn’t think he was, at least not anymore.
 

They arrived at the beach house soon after. The cars parked outside where the same ones that had been there ten years before. The entire family had shown up, even Grandma Joan. Mimi said she was bringing her nurse with her.
 

Nick almost pulled the door open for Joy, but he didn’t. He wasn’t one of the nice ones, and maybe if she saw that she’d break things off with him. It would give him a reason to move out of Shepton. People would understand if he said that he had been too lonely to stay. Maybe there were jobs in Glensford, better ones than the life sucking one at the mayor’s office.
 

“This place is nice,” Mimi said. “Do you guys just keep it empty during the year? You could rent it out during the summers…” Her eyes lit up as she talked about the house’s profit potentials.
 

“We’re not renting it out to anyone,” Nick said. They walked to the door. Mimi opened it before he had the chance to ring the doorbell. And for a moment as his eyes fell upon his sister’s face he saw the hint of a smile. Then her eyes trailed off to Joy and whatever hint had been there disappeared.
 

“Who’s this?” she asked.