Authors: Janelle Stalder
When he finally settled her back on her feet, I could tell she was uncomfortable. Her eyes were trained on him, purposely avoiding me now that Rannon had broken our contact. The smile on her face didn’t make those dimples come out, nor did it reach her eyes. She was definitely uncomfortable.
I glanced over at Cat to see her watching her friend with worry. Obviously my sister hadn’t realized just how awkward this would be. Or perhaps she hadn’t even told Chloe that this shop was mine. Knowing her, probably not.
Just as Cat never spoke about Chloe to me, I had a sneaking suspicion she didn’t talk about anything to do with me to Chloe. Things between us had mended, but that didn’t mean she had totally forgiven me for driving away her best friend.
If she was talking to our mom about something to do with Chloe and I walked in, she’d instantly stop. When she went to California for spring break, she didn’t say a word about her trip to me afterward.
It sort of bothered me, because who was I kidding? I was desperate to know what Chloe was up to and if she was okay - happy. Cat never gave me that. And when I accidentally overheard her talking to Chloe on the phone one night about Chloe’s boyfriend, I had decided then and there that I didn’t want to know about her after all.
That had been the last time I got shit faced drunk. I still couldn’t drink vodka since.
After that I focused on finishing up my school and opening my business. It wasn’t long after Chloe left that I decided to take her advice and not let my talent for drawing go to waste.
When she had left, I’d spiraled down into a depressed mood, sleeping all the time because that was the only place I could see her again. Until I started to draw her. Over and over I’d drawn Chloe, bringing her back to me on paper. I remembered every part of her that had entranced me from the beginning. Those eyes, her lips, the long, delicate line of her neck. I’d sketched it all until it finally hit me that I could do this for a living.
My eyes moved to where I’d displayed some of them and wondered if she’d seen them. They were mixed in with my others so possibly not.
I was still apprenticing to be a fully licensed tattoo artist. But that hadn’t stopped me from opening my shop and working my ass off for half a year to get it to the place where it was today.
I had four other artists working out of the shop, and our clientele was growing by the day. Things couldn’t have been better.
And yet, there was always something missing. Life never felt complete. I was working, had my own company, had a great group of friends, and had even bought my own condo apartment that I was moving into in the fall when it was built, but I wasn’t happy. Not like I had been when I’d been with her.
And now she was here. Right in front of me. And I was standing near my office as though someone had glued my feet to the floor.
All I wanted to do was go up to her, grab her, and kiss the fuck out of her. But she would never let me. Whatever had been between us was gone. Because of me. And now that I saw her again after nine months, I was having a hard time remembering why.
“Ky?”
I blinked, looking down to see Cat standing in front of me with a funny expression.
“What?”
“You know, if you stare any harder, it’s going to start being creepy,” she said with a smirk.
I narrowed my eyes. If I didn’t know better, I would think she was enjoying this. “What do you want?”
Her eyes sparkled with amusement. “I just wanted to let you know that I’m leaving.”
“Fine. Goodbye.”
She chuckled. “See you later, bro.”
I watched in envy as she walked up to Chloe and threw her arms around her, squealing.
How was I supposed to handle having Chloe back? I didn’t know how long she was sticking around for this time, but even just one day was torture.
Fuck. I hoped it wasn’t just for one day.
Man, I was so screwed.
Rannon leaned on the counter across from me, slapping it loudly. I looked up from the appointment book I was going over.
“Can I help you with something?” I asked.
He had a shit-eating grin on his face since the second Cat and Chloe had walked out the door without so much as a backward glance at me. That had pissed me off, but what else could I expect?
That fucking grin on his face widened when he noticed my annoyance. Shoving a hand through my hair, I closed the book to give him my full attention.
“What? If you have something to say, say it.”
Rannon just shrugged, his expression never changing.
“I swear to God, Ran, I’m going to punch you in the face if you don’t stop that.”
He chuckled. “Look at you all riled up. I wonder why?” He waggled his eyebrows.
“Uh, probably because you’re standing there staring at me like a moron.”
“Sure. Keep telling yourself that.”
“What do you want from me?”
“Just admit it. You still have the hots for Chloe Morgan.”
“You and I both know Colt will have my ass if I even go near her,” I pointed out.
“Why? None of us know what happened between you two. Unless you want to tell me...?” He leaned in closer, eyebrows raised.
“Pass.”
He sighed. “Fine. Anyway, he can’t force you to stay away if she doesn’t want you to.”
I laughed humorlessly. “Then that’s settled, because there’s no way she wants anything to do with me. Trust me.”
“Pppffftttt, then you’re as dumb as you are stubborn.” He shook his head. “The tension between you two is off the charts, bro. That girl is so not over you either.”
My leg started to bounce as I searched his face, trying to decide if he was bullshitting me or not. I rubbed at my chin. “What makes you think that?”
“I can tell. She did everything she could not to look at you, but she was totally aware of you the entire time.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I know women, dude.”
“No, Ran, you don’t.”
“And I know that girl is still hot for you.”
Could that be possible? Rannon was an idiot, so it was likely he had no idea what he was talking about. But what if there were some old feelings left? I couldn’t leave her alone until I knew for sure. If there was one thing I had realized the second I laid eyes on her today, it was that I couldn’t walk away from her a second time.
Unless she didn’t want me. If that were the case, I’d leave her alone. But I’d made a mistake before, and I had figured it out shortly after she left, never thinking I’d get another chance to fix things with her. This was my second chance, and I wasn’t going to waste it.
By the time I was done closing up the shop it was past dinner. Dad was in the kitchen when I got home, loading dishes into the dishwasher. Mom was asleep, which was normal for this time of the evening.
She’d been pretty steady with her days, and had learned not to push herself. I knew how much it bothered her that she relied on all of us so much, but no one wanted to go through what we had to before when she fell.
“How was work?” Dad asked as I walked in.
“Busy,” I replied.
“That’s good. Busy is good.”
I nodded. It was crazy but I knew it was better than not being busy.
“Did your sister go out with Chloe?”
“Yeah, she came by the shop to pick her up.”
“I’m happy she’s back. Your sister missed her. It’s nice to know they have each other again for the summer.”
I paused in my reach for a pop from inside the fridge, looking at him over the fridge door.
“How do you know she’s here for the summer?” I asked.
“Because they’re going to be driving to school when it’s over.”
My confused face made him laugh.
“Didn’t your sister tell you? They’re getting a place together at university.”
A blank stare was my only reply. He shook his head as he loaded the last plate.
“Don’t you two talk at all? What is it with you and Chloe?”
I straightened, shutting the door. “What do you mean?” I asked, leaning against the counter.
“What, you think I don’t notice these things?”
“What things?”
“Things like how your sister always stops talking about Chloe whenever you’re around, for one.”
I pulled the tab on the can, taking a big gulp.
“Do you want to tell me what happened?”
I rubbed a hand down my face. “Not really,” I said honestly.
Dad turned, leaning against the counter across from me with arms crossed. It was his determined stance, which meant I wasn’t leaving here without giving him some sort of explanation.
“I screwed things up,” I said.
“Does this have to do with you two showing up together at the hospital that day?”
I nodded. “We were dating.”
The only hint that he was surprised by this was a subtle rise of his brows.
“And what happened?”
I took a deep breath. “I started to fall for her, like really fall for her. And then I saw you when Mom was hurt, and you said all that stuff about love hurting you, and I knew I had to end it before things got too deep.”
“Oh, Son,” he said sadly. He crossed the space to stand in front of me, placing a hand on each of my shoulders. “I’m sorry.”
I blanched. “For what?”
“I should have never said those things. I was just so worried and my brain wasn’t right. Love is the greatest thing in this world. Life would be empty without it.” He shook his head, looking so disappointed with either himself or me, I couldn’t tell.
“It can hurt sometimes, Kyle, I’m not going to lie to you. And of course it hurts more when it’s love, because that person means more to you than anything. But to not have that? And to find that with someone and just let it go? That’s worse, Ky. That’s not living. If this girl means something to you, you need to hold onto her and do whatever you can to make it work. And when things get tough, you just work harder. It’s not always going to be easy, but it’s not supposed to.”
I could barely look him in the eye. “I don’t think she’ll take me back,” I admitted. “I really messed up and hurt her.”
“If she felt for you what you do for her, there is always another chance there. You’re a great guy, and she knows that, I know she does. Anyone who knows you can see that. All you can do is apologize and do whatever you can to make her see that you mean it.”
“And how do I do that?”
He smiled, slapping me on the arm. “You use that Briggs charm and tenacity. If we want something, we get it.”
I laughed. “It’s just as easy as that, huh? Even when the person hates you?”
“There’s a fine line between love and hate, Son. You just need to nudge her the right way.”
31
Chloe
Being back in Bloomfield with Cat was amazing. It felt as though I’d never left. We fell into the same easy friendship we’d had when I first moved here. That first night we’d gone out to dinner and literally laughed the entire time.
Surprisingly Cat and Jessie never got together like I thought they would, but there was a telltale blush on her cheeks when she spoke about him that made me think maybe she wasn’t as indifferent to him as she’d like me to believe. I didn’t push it though. And thankfully she didn’t say anything about Kyle.
All week we hung out, and not once did she mention her brother. We went shopping for things for our apartment, and for new outfits. We got our nails done and went to the movies. We did everything together, unless she was at work. I never picked her up from there again. Did that make me a chicken? Maybe. But I couldn’t put myself through seeing Kyle in person again, not when my body betrayed me as soon as we were in the same room. And not when his drawings of me were plastered all over the walls of the shop.
Today we were tanning down at the lake, lying side by side as music played from her iPod. My mind was going over those drawings, wondering why he’d done them, and why he would put them up there? If I hadn’t meant anything to him, why did he still draw me?
“So how did you get a job at that shop?” I asked before I could think better of it. I needed to know why they let Kyle put his drawings there.
Cat turned to me, lifting her sunglasses up so I could see her eyes. “I asked,” she said simply.
I laughed. That was such a Cat response. “Was it because,” my voice caught. I cleared it before being able to continue. “Kyle worked there?”
Her lips turned up in a smile.
“What?” I asked, her expression making me shift on my towel.
“That’s the first time you’ve said his name to me since that day.”
I turned my head to look up at the sky, shrugging. “So? I’m just asking about you, not him.”
She was silent for a moment.
“Well, for your information, it’s his shop.”
That had my head whipping back to her. “What? What do you mean?”
“It’s Kyle’s shop. He owns it.”
“He owns it?” I couldn’t hide the surprise in my voice.
“Yeah,” she said lightly, lowering her glasses again. “He decided he should do more with his talent for drawing, so he opened a tattoo shop when he was done with school. Now he’s apprenticing until he can tattoo on his own.”
Wow. He opened his own shop. And he did it because of his talent for drawing. Was it because I had told him he should do something with it? No. I doubted I had anything to do with his life decisions.