Authors: Diane Munier
Darnay Road (33 page)
“Stanley
maybe we should…,” Marsha begins, two hands gripping her pocketbook. She is
still standing in my doorway and she is a scared rabbit.
“You
all right Granma?” I ask. My granma looks so pale nothing else matters as much.
“I’ll
be fine. Stanley you need to leave,” she has a hand over her chest.
“What’s
the matter?” he says. He’s worried. It’s the first sign that he might be human,
might be her son, might care, if this is caring. I don’t know. I don’t know
him.
“You’ve
upset…Georgia. You need to go,” Granma puffs.
“Here
Ma,” Stanley says leading her two steps to my bed. He helps her ease down. “Do
you want to lie down?”
“Heaven
sakes leave me be,” she says waving him off. “You can’t barge in here and try
to take over.”
“I’m
trying to keep something worse from happening,” he says, but not like a cop,
not like a crazy father. He says this more like a son.
“Are
you all right, Granma?” I say crawling on the bed to sit beside her even if it
brings me closer to Stanley.
“I’m
fine,” she puts her hand on my arm but I can see she’s not fine.
“You should go,” I say to him. He has come in
here and upset her. I’m so angry at what he’s done, what he’s threatened.
“Don’t
be telling me to go. This was my home long before it was yours,” he says. “I’m
still your father.”
“Get
out,” I say more firmly. I don’t know where it’s coming from, this nerve. But
I’ve changed since Friday when Easy came to my school. It’s changed me.
Marsha’s
heels sound on the floor and she rounds my bed and steps to Stanley. “Come here
for a minute,” she says to him. “We’ll wait downstairs.”
Stanley
is looking at me and Granma. “Go,” Granma says.
Finally
he listens.
“We’ll
be right downstairs,” Marsha says, as much to Stanley as to me and Granma.
So
he’s not leaving the house but he’s backing off for a minute at least.
I
am sitting beside Granma holding onto her arm.
“I
didn’t call him,” she says to me.
“What’s
the matter with you? Are you sick?”
“I
get short of breath sometimes. Asthma.”
This
is the first I’m hearing of it. “Can you die from asthma?”
“No,”
she scoffs.
“Well
I didn’t know about it,” I say.
“Why
would you need to? It’s just troublesome sometimes.”
“Well
you should tell me these things!”
“Oh
my. So grown up.”
“I am growing up,
Granma. But…I’m sorry about…all this.”
She
pats my leg. “I know. I just…you worried me,” she says. “I know you’re good.
You’re….”
I
turn to her and we hug one another. I am crying right off.
“I
know it has to be hard to raise me.”
“I
never meant that. You’ve been my greatest joy.”
“I
have?”
“Of
course you have,” she says smoothing my hair back from my face.
“Please
don’t be upset with me. Easy didn’t mean anything. He’s the best boy I’ve ever
known.”
She
just holds me, or tries to. She pulls back to breathe. “Georgia…you’re so
young. And he’s going away. I know he’s a good young man. I know that. But he’s
not had….”
He’s
not had. He’s not had anyone to love him.
“I
love him, Granma.”
“My
Lord,” Granma whispers. “I know you do.”
“And
he loves me,” I say. “I’m…I’m waiting for him.”
“Georgia
Christine,” she says. She nearly groans it.
“I
didn’t…we didn’t do anything in that church but talk. We haven’t seen each
other in four years, Granma. He’s traveled and we were just worn out I guess.
But Granma…we were telling each other our hearts. And now we’re being punished
for it and Stanley is threatening…and it’s always been Easy who’s done more for
us…he doesn’t even know Easy and he comes here like he’s…I don’t care if he is
my father. I don’t even like him.”
We
stare at one another and I see the first trace of a smile on my Granma’s face
and then she laughs a little, then a little more and I laugh too.
“Be
careful of your asthma,” I say.
“Oh
my. My oh my.”
We’re
quiet for a few seconds. “Your father got that way from his daddy doing him
like that.”
“Grampa?”
The great and glorious grampa that she loved? The man who looked like Norman
Bates…I mean Anthony Perkins?
“Yes.
That kind of thing is passed one to another…bullying. He was a good husband to
me…but he never took to Stanley. And I babied him for it. Your father. He met
your mother and…it was quick. Too quick. I knew that.”
I
sit back to better see her face.
She
runs her hand over my hair, to the tip of my sloppy braid. “My girl. We are
quick, impulsive lovers. Stubborn lovers. Can’t tell us a darn thing about it.
Not a one of us.”
Maybe
it’s that way. But then neither one of them, not my father, and I guess not my
granma, though it will take some long thinking to get my mind over this new
information about Grandpa, but neither of them picked someone like Easy,
apparently. Me and Easy are the exception. We won’t have their kind of broken
love.
“Granma,
do you wish you wouldn’t have married Grampa?”
She
sighs, but it’s cut short and she pulls in a breath that is also short. “Can’t
say. It doesn’t work like that. Regret doesn’t do anyone a lick of good unless
you learn from it. So I’ve tried to do better with you. You’ve been…a second
chance to get some things right.”
But
now I just feel grateful for my Granma, like never before. “I’m so glad you
raised me and not him. I would never want to be stuck with him.”
She
laughs a little, but she wipes at a couple of tears. “My girl, we got off,
didn’t we? We forgot who we were.”
“Well,
I think I’m still trying to find myself, but opposition makes you wake up,” I
say. I think I’m trying to say something brilliant and it’s a big thought and I
only understand the smallest part of it, but I could almost thank Officer
Stanley right now for waking me up from my angry stupor and reminding me about
who I might be. I am Granma’s daughter. I am that exactly. I am in love with
Easy. That might be stubborn-can’t-tell-me-a-thing-love, but it’s real.
And
real is the only way to go even if it includes suffering.
Especially
then.
Downstairs
there is a note. They have gone for lunch. They will be back in an hour.
That’s
when there is a knock on the door.
I
know who it is before I ever look and see his outline beyond the lace curtain.
It’s
Easy.
Granma
lets him in, a sweep of her hand and there I stand, halfway to the kitchen and
as soon as I see him I go to him. He’s in uniform and he drops his hat on the
floor and I crash against him and it doesn’t even move him an inch he holds me
so tight.
“My,”
I hear Granma say on a sigh, longer this time because her breath is coming
back.
We
love stubborn.
Darnay
Road 56
Aunt
May knocks before I can let go of Easy. I have missed him so much, and it feels
like safety now that he’s here, like everything will be all right. His eyes
hold the opposite of what I saw in Stanley’s. Easy doesn’t think he’s good but
he’s the best man in the whole entire world.
He’s
so strong and handsome. He’s what is right…about everything.
But
he has to get out of here. He has to run.
Before
I can say this Granma is opening the door again and I think it’s Stanley but
no, it’s Aunt May.
“Oh
my gosh I thought you were Stanley,” I say stepping back from Easy but holding
onto his arm. “You have to go. You can’t be here when he gets back.”
“What
in the world are you doing here?” Aunt May asks Easy like she came here just to
say that.
“I
came to see Georgia,” Easy answers, “and talk to her father.”
“No,”
Granma and I say in unison.
I’m
running my hand over my braid. I’ve just been rolling around on my floor and
fighting with Stanley. I’m a mess. We’re a mess.
“You
can’t be here,” May says to Easy.
“You’re
the one who called me,” he says.
“I
said to come to my house first,” May says.
“What
are you doing, May?” Granma says.
“I’m trying to help
Easy with Stanley,” she says.
“Why
would you do that?” Granma says. “You have no idea….”
“I
spoke to Stanley before he left with Marsha to go to lunch,” May says. “He’s
upset but I think if he meets Easy he’ll see what a fine young man he is.”
“You
need to go home. You can’t talk to him,” I say to Easy.
“Sure
I can,” Easy says.
“No…I
mean…there’s no talking to him,” I say.
“I
can try,” Easy says.
“There’s
no point,” I say louder because Easy is not hearing me or something.
“It
would be better to invite him to talk to you at my house,” May says.
We
all look at her.
“A
neutral location,” May says.
“What
are you talking about May?” Granma says. “You need to leave, Easy. Before he
gets back.”
“Can
I wait on the porch Miss Vi? I need to speak with him. For Georgia,” Easy says
looking at me.
“You’re
not going to ask for her hand or some nonsense?” Granma says alarmed.
“Well,”
Easy says putting his hand on my arm, “not now. But….”
“He
could come back here any minute,” May is saying.
“You
don’t need to ask him anything. I don’t care what he says,” I tell Easy.
“I
care,” Easy says. “He’s your father. I don’t want to…sneak.”
“It’s
not his business. I’m not his business,” I say. “I hate him.”
“Georgia
Christine,” Granma says tiredly.
“Go
home before he comes back,” I say to Easy moving a little toward the door that
Aunt May is blocking.
“Can
I wait on the porch Miss Vi?” Easy says to Granma like I didn’t just give him
his marching orders.
“You’re
not listening,” I say to him.
“This
whole thing is my fault and it’s a big fix,” Easy says but he’s looking at
Granma mostly. “Georgia didn’t do anything wrong. Everything that got her in
trouble was my idea—my fault.”
“There’s
no time for this,” Granma says. “Go on to Disbro’s.”
“I’ll
stand out on the sidewalk if that’s all right Miss Vi.”
“No!”
I say loudly. “You can’t wait on the sidewalk. We just had a terrible fight in
here and Granma has asthma. When Stanley is gone you can come back.” Then I
look at Granma, “Can’t he Granma?”
“He
can wait at my house,” May says. “I’m going to ask Stanley to come over and
listen to what Easy has to say.”
“What
do you know about any of it?” Granma says to May.
“I’ve…been
talking to Easy. I’ve had a change of heart. I think…maybe we judged him too
quickly. Too harshly.” May folds her hands and lifts her chin.
“Thank
you Aunt May,” I say like I have asthma. I mean I’m kind of out of breath from
what she said.
“For
heaven sakes,” Granma says rubbing her forehead. “Get in to the table all of
you.”
We
file in there and Easy sits where he did that first evening when he came home
and we hadn’t messed it up yet.
Granma
clears the two cold cups of coffee from Stanley and Marsha.
“I
can ask Anthony to come over,” Aunt May says kind of wringing her hands on the
table.
“What
in the world would you do that for?” Granma says pulling a chair.
“Father
Anthony?” I say before I can stop it. We all know he’s not father anymore, but
I didn’t know he was still in May’s life.
“Just
Anthony. The scripture says to call no man father,” May says.
“I
don’t need his permission for anything,” I tell Easy, just so he knows about
Stanley and me. I don’t know what he has in his head, but it isn’t like that
around here. Granma is the one he needs to keep in his pocket. Well mostly me.
The
door opens then and I take a breath. “We’re not asking,” I say to Easy. “We are
not asking.”
I
mean, permission. We are not asking permission from Stanley.
My
father stops in the doorway, looks around. “What’s this?” he says.
Marsha
is peeking from around Stanley’s shoulder.
I
stand. “This is Easy. I told him not to stay, but he wants to meet you. You
better be nice….”
“Georgia,”
Granma says sternly.
I
shut my trap and sit, my elbow a little in front of Easy because Stanley is not
touching Easy.
Then
I have to move a little because Easy is standing. He has that hat under his arm
and he extends this hand over the table, kind of over Granma even. “How do you
do, sir?”
Granma
sits back more. She wants to see this, but Stanley should know, Easy is
surrounded by friends—me for sure, my Granma, and Aunt May.
“I’m
Ethan Caghan,” Easy says. I almost forget he’s Ethan Caghan sometimes but we’re
throwing his name all over the place today.
He
waits for Stanley, his hand in the air.
“Well
shake it at least,” I say to Stanley also standing, nodding toward Easy’s hand
just extended there looking for something from my ass of a dad.
Stanley
swallows, his throat working, his eyes burning into Easy, into me. He looks
pushed as he takes an awkward step into the kitchen. I realize Marsha has
pushed him.
Stanley
clears his throat and takes another step toward the table and that puts him close
enough. He looks at me and shakes Easy’s hand.
And
the roof does not even fall in.
I
may not ever love Stanley. I really don’t like him. But right then, it’s okay
that I came from him. I can live with it maybe.
“Got
my daughter in all the trouble,” Stanley says.
They
just shake once, but it’s enough for both of them. They let go.
“Yes
sir. It was all my fault. I wanted to see the church. Guess I didn’t know I was
tired.”
You
can hear the clock on the wall making a whirring noise.
Easy
sits back down.
Stanley
has questions then, about the service. Stanley has his hands on his hips like
he’s interrogating a punk in his big blue uniform or something. But Easy
answers Stanley with no problem. He sounds about so smart I’m very proud.
Then
it takes a left turn, Stanley does. “That was some business back there with
your dad,” he says.
I
feel it run through Easy then, this other thing that makes him breathe in twice
as big. “Yes sir.”
“Well,
best thing you can do is try to make something of yourself,” Stanley, in all
his infinite wisdom concludes.
Easy
doesn’t say anything. No more ‘sirs,’ at least.
“He’s
a good boy,” Granma says.
“Yes,”
Aunt May echoes.
I
really can’t believe it. Not that Easy is good because he is the very best. But
the back-up for Easy.
Stanley
is stewing on that a little. “You know Georgia is too young for a boyfriend,”
he says.
“Well…,”
Easy looks at me, “we been friends for years.”
“That’s
fine,” Stanley says, “but I know what kind of a fool a sixteen year old boy is
even if he wears a uniform. Now she’s got punishment from your last little
deal, and you need to get back to the base and keep doing that thing where you
rise above your circumstances.”
“I
am going back, sir. Next week.”
“In
the meantime you don’t be trying to cool your heels around here,” Stanley says.
I
stand up quick. My body ahead of my words.
“You
go on back to your life in Chicago,” I say. “Don’t be cooling your heels around
here. It may have been your home first, but it hasn’t been yours in a while. We
don’t need you.”
“You
don’t need me?” He gets red in the face and he’s got a vein in his forehead
filling up like a garden hose.
“Charles,”
Marsha says from behind him, just like a good woman, you know, one behind every
good man or every asshole of a man. There has to be somebody to shit on I
guess.
“I
will pick my friends,” I say hotly. I know I’m making it worse, but I’ve got so
many words piling up in me I think they were hiding in there like an extra
liver or something.
“Georgia
Christine, sit down,” Granma says. Her soft voice pierces all that angry
rambling in my head.
“Granma,
I….” I don’t even know how to explain myself.
“Sit
down,” Granma says. “Stanley we are done here for today. Raising Georgia, for
all the mistakes I can make, has always come naturally to me.”
“That
why we got this trouble Ma?” Stanley says, that strange younger tone coming to
him again.
“And
what child do you raise that does not give you a few bumps along the way?”
Granma says, voice louder and hands on the table to better turn her body so she
faces him. “Should I remind you?”
She
gets him with that one. Guess old Stanley wasn’t so perfect. He’s looking over
the group now.
“Don’t
be foolish,” he says to her.
“It’s
not my foolishness I’m talking about,” Granma says.
Back
to the clock, whirr, whirr.
Stanley
glares at me a little, then he turns it on Easy. “I’ve been right where you are
now. I’d tell you what a damn fool you are, but you wouldn’t listen. You keep
it in your thick head boy, she is not going to end up with you. She’s got her
sights set on bigger things and you don’t even know it. You are not the big
thing. Not those passable looks and not that damn uniform. Not going to war,
getting shot at and buying her every piece of black market jewelry you come
across. Not all the times you pass it up and hold out for her. None of it will
make you enough. Fool. She’ll always want more than you can ever, on your best damn
day, give her.”
“Stanley,”
Marsha says in an actual voice, one with weight, one that gives enough bone to
his name it could stand there.