Darkness Betrayed (Torn) (10 page)

“Why would she do that?” Noah, face ashen, spoke from the doorway as he looked out into the now serene fall day.

“She sacrificed herself for me.” Branna’s hand covered her mouth and she closed her eyes, tears falling down her face.

“You could’ve saved her!” Jumping up to face him, I screamed at Damien.

“I couldn’t.”

“Yes you could have. I know you could have! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Samantha, Malena made a choice. I couldn’t very well step in the middle of that, now could I?” He dared me to respond and I knew he heard the conversation she and I had earlier. By not stepping in, he punished her for questioning him and for warning me. She hadn’t really made the choice. He’d made it for her. This time to silence her.

“She couldn’t have!”

“It’s what she wanted. I decided it was time to grant her that wish.”

Breathless, my heart raced as we stared each other down, waiting for me to question him, to tell the others what he did. But I couldn’t. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t turn against him. The very thought of it pinched my heart. He reached out and grazed my chin with his soft fingers. I closed my eyes at the touch and our bodies became magnets. I had to fight the urge to pull him in.

Ethan must’ve, at some point, gone outside because when he came back in the house he told us what we didn’t want to hear. “Her body’s gone.”

I tore my eyes from Damien’s, not sure if I was still in shock at his callousness or my silence on the matter. Or because I wanted him.

Chapter 14

“What do you mea
n ‘her body’s gone’?” Christian asked the question that must have crossed all our minds.

“I mean there is no body. Just her wings.”

“Maybe she’s in the woods somewhere. Some of us should go look,” Mara offered her logical solution.

“Yeah, that’s probably it.” Ethan looked confused as he pushed his hair out of his eyes.

“No. That’s not it.” All eyes turned to Damien as he brushed past me. “Sebastian has her body.”

“Why would he need her body?” Mara asked.

“He will turn her into a winged minion.”

“I’m sorry, what?” I wasn’t following.

“The flying minions, the scaly creatures with spindly wings and thin swords. When someone crosses him, he reincarnates them as those mindless killing creatures.”

“That’s awful!” Branna tears flowed more heavily.

“Why didn’t we know about this?” Ethan’s tone forced through Branna’s sobs.

“It’s common knowledge, I would think. You think someone would choose to become something so foul?” Damien spoke like we were caught not studying for a test.

“Wait. If Malena is one of them now, or will be soon, then that means…”

Ethan cut off Cal’s thought process “…Jesse. Scott.”

“My father.”

Everyone in the room looked at me and I turned to face Damien. “Is my father one of them?”

“They were all buried. They can’t…”

“I don’t know.” Interrupting Ethan, his eyes no longer showed anger or defiance. Instead, Damien looked at me with the softest, saddest expression and I f
elt all the pain in my soul evaporate.

He wiped large, black tears from my face and leaned down to kiss me softly.

Ethan’s thoughts pushed into my head.
Sam!

I felt his heart break and I ignored him. All I felt was Damien. With him there
was no confusion, no questions and, most blissful of all, no conflict. There was only controlled calm as our lips slowly pressed together.

His fingers grazed my chin. “If he is, I promise I’ll fix it.”

I could only nod and take his promise to heart.

“Mara, sit with Samantha. Ethan and I need to have a discussion.”

***

“Are you okay?” Mara’s voice was warm as we sat on the couch.

“No. She’s dead.” I didn’t wipe away my tears. They fell from my face leaving black stains on my clothing.

“She is. I don’t know how to make sense of all of this. I don’t know how to make you feel better.”

“You can’t. Sebastian probably took her body and who knows who else he’s transformed into one of those nasty things.”

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think your father met the same fate as the others.”

“Why not? Don’t you think Sebastian would’ve loved that?”

“Maybe.” She contemplated as she tucked her feet under her. “But I think your father was too strong, too good, for Sebastian to have won that way. And like Ethan was saying, we buried them all.”

“I hope you’re right. Damien will fix it if you’re not.”

“You think so?” Her head cocked to the side, I could tell she was wary.

“He said so.”

“And you believe him?”

“Why wouldn’t I? He’s done everything he said he would, so far.”

“So he’s aptly trained you? Taught you the control you so desperately crave? Helped you learn to block the thoughts I can hear so clearly?”

“It’s only been a few days.”

“And you’ve lost control how many times?
Malena has died, been taken by Sebastian. You’ve shut out Ethan and given your heart to the devil – you take him at his word. A word that, historically, has been regarded as crap.”

“You don’t know him.”

She leaned toward me. “And you do?”

“I can’t explain it. I feel like I know him better than I know myself.” I pulled the blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped myself in it. “I feel…like we’re the same.”

“You aren’t the same, Samantha. Get that thought out of your head. Damien is evil. He does nothing unless it benefits him. There’s a catch somewhere. He’s going to do something, take something in return for all his
help
. Mark my words. This is not going to end well. Never let down your guard Samantha. Remember, the devil may have once been an angel but he is no longer good.”

I was too tired to deal with her. I just wanted Damien to come and save me from her questions and suspicions. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. Just leave me alone, Mara. Just go.”

“Yes, Mara. Why don’t you go? Branna is attempting to keep herself busy by making dinner. I’m afraid she’s not quite up to the challenge right now. Maybe you could help her?”

He took my breath away. His dark hair was disheveled from constantly running his hands through it. His eyes looked worn but seemed to only find energy as they focused on me. Shirt halfway unbuttoned, dark jeans and barefoot, he looked every bit of the angel I wanted him to be. There was no sign of the demon, the liar, the punisher everyone else saw.

Mara looked at him with hatred in her eyes. He, on the other hand, blanked his face. I couldn’t read him. As she rose to leave, she turned to me. “Be careful.”

He waited until she was out of the room. “You’re so easy to read, Samantha.”

“I don’t mean to be.”

“Your thoughts fill the room. Everyone around you knows your fears, your strengths. It would be so easy to take advantage of that.” He settled next to me, leaning back against the arm of the couch and pulled me into his lap.  I rested my head on his chest and closed my eyes. Thou
ghts of his hands and lips on my skin swirled into a frenzy.

“I don’t know how to shut it off.”

I could hear the smile in his voice. “It is time to remedy that. It’s too much to have to constantly throw walls up around your head.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I generally enjoy what you’ve got streaming in there these past few days.” His hands raked through my hair. “I just don’t think the others need to hear all of it.”

I bolted upright. “Do they know that we, what we…”

His laugh interrupted my panic. “No. Walls, remember?”

I turned to face him and he leaned forward to place his hands on either side of my face.

“I want you to concentrate on keeping your thoughts to yourself. You need to be aware, at all times, of what is going through your head and who is around to hear it.”

“That sounds so simple.”

He settled back. “It is. I am, to be honest, surprised that no one has taught you this before. I would have thought Ethan, especially, would have shown you how by now. He is
supposed
to be protecting you.”

I mulled this over, chewing on the inside of my cheek. “So all I have to do I think about not sharing my thoughts and poof! They can’t hear me?”

“Pretty much. It takes a little more practice but, yes.”

“Why the hell would they have let this go on so long? Why couldn’t they have taken the time to explain how
simple
it all was?” Angry didn’t begin to describe what I felt. I felt like they didn’t trust me, like they didn’t want me to have that control.

“My opinion?”

“Yeah.”

“They don’t trust you.” His words echoed exactly what I was feeling. “Since they don’t know where your loyalty lies, at least not for certain, they allowed you to go on shouting every thought from the rooftops. They could control your moods and feelings that way. They
don’t
want you to control that part of you.”

Nervous energy found me as I bounced my knee, trying to understand. “So I’m basically a pariah
; that’s what you’re telling me?”

“I think pariah is too strong a word. You’re not an outcast. They very much want you in their circle, to lead them. But none of them are completely comfortable with either the decisions you’ve made or the manner in which you carry them out.”

“Decisions? Like allowing Sebastian to get away? Like allowing Lucas to live?”

“There’s that and the fact that they think you choose to allow yourself to separate.”

“I have no control over that!” He watched me pace the living room. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he was enjoying my torment. “Why are you smiling? You’ve basically just told me my friends think I’m a nut job and don’t trust me. How am I supposed to defeat Sebastian and retrieve that stupid box if I don’t have people behind me who believe in me?”

“They believe in you. They just don’t know what to do with you. Come, sit down. Pacing and biting your fingernails to the quick won’t help you.”

I curled up in his lap and he resumed stroking my hair. “How do I control that? How do I keep it all inside of me? I know I can’t beat Sebastian with light. I need to be able to allow darkness to consume me without it actually taking over.”

“About that…”

He seemed to be lost in thought. “What?”
Is he going to be able to help me?

“I can help you
, Samantha. It’s just that, well, it’s not going to be pleasant.”

“What do you mean?”

“When you separate the two, you’re generally out of control for a reason.”

“I get angry.”

“It’s more than anger. It’s pain. It’s despair. It’s rage.”

“So you have to hurt me.” I contemplated what he’d have to do or say to get me to the breaking point. He was right. It wasn’t going to be pleasant.

“Yes, but not just me. I’ll need to enlist the help of the others. They won’t want to do it. They won’t want to hurt you, but it’s a necessity if you’re going to be able to remain whole. We can’t have you divided when you meet Sebastian again.”

“What’s strange is that I wasn’t divided, as you say, when he and I last met. I knew that I had to be focused. Why am I so volatile now? What makes this time so different?”

“He’s done more damage. Not only did he kill your father but he took Lucas and killed Malena. The relationship between you and Ethan is brittle. He’s angrier now. Before, it was a game. Now it’s personal.”

Chewing my lip distractedly, I thought of what tomorrow would bring. I wondered if my father was one of them now. If he was one of Sebastian’s foul minions
! I wondered if and when I’d face Jesse, Scott and Malena again. I did know, however, that when we came face to face, I’d have to take the personal out of it and kill them as I had the other Exiled.

He broke me free of my thoughts when he grabbed my face and kissed me.
The kiss warmed me from my toes to my ears. It was a kiss that poured need, lust, and greed into my soul. With his hands tangled in my hair, he drew me in deeper, barely satiating a hunger for him that bloomed inside me. He pulled away abruptly, my lips burning with memories the instant we parted.

“What was that for?”

“Practice.”

“Practice?”

He stood and faced me. “Yes. Dinner is ready and the kitchen will be crowded. I want you to keep that kiss to yourself. I want you to think about it, remember it, crave it but I want you to keep it from the others.”

My fingers grazed my lips and I closed my eyes. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

He smiled and reached for my hand. “That kiss was between us. Keep it that way.”

***

Dinner was somber, all eyes avoiding the now empty seat once occupied by Malena. Other than Branna’s stifled sobs between bites of pasta, the table was quiet. Ethan sat rigid, refusing to make eye contact with me. Christian and Mara often reached for the other’s hand. Noah pushed food around his plate. Cal inhaled his food at an alarming rate, serving himself thirds before I was even halfway done with my first helping. Damien sat quietly contemplating the others, slowly sipping his water. I was secretly grateful for the mood. It gave me a reason to focus on the task at hand.

It was much easier to concentrate on hiding my thoughts from the others when I wasn’t being barraged with a million questions of what we going to do next, of wondering aloud where Sebastian was, of what his next move was going to be.  Instead, I was able to avoid all conversations simply because there weren’t any. Any flush that crept into my cheeks could have been attributed to sadness at
Malena’s sudden demise. Any instance of me closing my eyes tightly or staring into my lap could have been blamed on my being overcome with grief. Goosebumps that littered my arms and the small shivers that made me jump slightly could not have been the result, to anyone in the room, of Damien randomly reaching under the table to squeeze my knees.

It was the longest meal in history. The clink of forks on plates, the placement of glasses and bowls – the sound
would have been almost deafening were it not for the fact that I was preoccupied with keeping my thoughts from them. Branna had decided it was all too much halfway through and bolted out of the kitchen, tears running down her face. Mara went after her, followed by Christian. Noah got up, threw his plate into the sink and headed out the back door. Cal leaned back, after finally clearing his plate of his fourth helping of spaghetti.