Convenience and Compatibility (29 page)

I come out of my bedroom and Tara and Greg
are sitting at the dining room table, talking. They stop and look
at me as I walk up to them and I have a feeling their conversation
was about me. I can only speculate what about.

“Ready.”

Greg jumps to his feet and opens the door for
me. I wave at Tara as I leave, only to have her wink at me with a
smile. Tara can be so predictable.

We walk to his car and Greg keeps a little
distance. I was a little scared that he would get the idea that we
are back together if I spent time with him today. If I’m honest
with myself I’m a little disappointed that he hasn’t touched me,
but also relieved that he hasn’t touched me. He opens my door and
we get into his massive SUV. It’s so ostentatious, but it matches
Greg’s personality to a T. I feel a little guilty that I love it in
spite of being pro-environment.

“Where are we going?”

“Well, I was going to take you hiking, but
you’re not really dressed for it.”

“Hmmm. Did you want me to change?”

“Oh no! What you’re wearing is perfect. I
especially love the shoes. How about a drive? Then a late
lunch?”

“Sounds great.” I smile to myself that he
noticed the shoes – I knew he would.

Greg hands me an energy bar before we get out
of the parking lot. “I figured you’d forget about breakfast.”

“I did. Thank you.”

I eat my energy bar as Greg gets on
Interstate 5. We drive North, getting off on the Edmonds exit and
drive towards the ferry. We talk about his work, the cases he
currently has and how his family is doing.

“I miss your parents, especially your
mom.”

“She misses you too.”

Uh oh, the conversation has gotten serious,
and I change it abruptly.

“So where are you taking me?”

We have stopped at the ferry terminal and are
waiting in line to board.

“I told you already. For a drive and a late
lunch.” Greg dazzles me with his Greek god smile that I’m sure
works on all the ladies.

My stomach churns a bit, remembering the last
time I came this way. Almost three weeks ago with Dean after our
weekend on the coast.

“Are you okay? We don’t have to go if you
don’t want to.” He looks concerned.

“No, no. I think it will be fun.” I give him
a half smile and from the look on his face know he’s not buying it.
The last thing I want to do is mention Dean every five minutes. I
keep my mouth shut and look out the window until the line starts
moving.

During the ferry ride we sit in the hold,
listening to music in the car. Greg puts on some Greek music with a
catchy beat that I would love to dance to even though I have no
idea what they are saying. It makes me think of his mother’s Greek
food and I salivate at the thought of her hummus, moussaka, pitas,
gyros, dolmades, and spanakopita. Yum.

Greg breaks my reverie. “What are you
thinking of?” He asks as we drive off the ferry.

I smile, caught red handed. “Greek food.”

“Really?”

“Oh yes, I love your mom’s hummus.”

“I’ll ask her to make you some.”

I cock my head to the side and he glances
over at me.

“What? You don’t want me to ask her?”

“No I don’t. What are you going to say? Mom,
could you go through all the trouble of making some time-consuming
food for a girl that I don’t go out with anymore?”

“Don’t forget broke up with me twice.”

“Right, twice. But remember, the second time
doesn’t count. We weren’t really together.”

“Oh, yea. That’s right.” Greg nods, mocking
me with a smile while shaking his head.

The mood has gotten darker and I’m not sure
how to change it. I stare out of the passenger window at the trees
zipping by – it really is quite beautiful on the peninsula.

“Are you going to tell me where we are going
next?”

“I thought we would head up to Port Townsend
and walk around a bit, have lunch…. Then make our way slowly back.
I know you like those little shops downtown.”

“You’re sweet Greg that sounds great.”

We are quiet for a while and Greg turns the
music to the local radio station. Rhianna’s song S&M comes on
and he turns it up, singing along. I roll my eyes but smile
playfully, remembering when we used to get a little crazy with
bondage. The times he’d blindfold me, teasing me with an array of
senses; fucking me against the wall of his condo as he held my arms
above my head; but I will always remember the time he tied me up to
his bed and tortured me with his tongue. That was amazing. I
squeeze my legs together reflexively as I look at his arm muscles
and realize they are my kryptonite. I remember the last time we
were together and he fucked the shit out of me on my apartment bed.
I sigh and look away.

“What?”

I look back to Greg. “Hmmm?”

“Why did you sigh, are you tired?” He asks,
concerned.

“No. I was just thinking of… never mind.” I
shake my head and turn back to looking out the side window.

“Okay.” Greg stifles a laugh and I look back
to him. “I think I know why.”

I punch him playfully in the biceps. Oh my,
it’s hard as a rock. I tilt my body away from his – I need to think
of something else before I put my hands down my pants or lean over
and put my mouth on his cock. Yes, I am a dirty girl.

We park near the entrance of downtown Port
Townsend and walk into town – very slowly with my inappropriate
shoes for the outing. I hold onto Greg, my arm linked into his,
more afraid of falling on the uneven sidewalk than wanting to be
close to him. At least I think this is the reason. It’s easy to lie
to yourself when you’ve been doing it for so long.

“You could have told me to put more proper
shoes on.”

“Oh no, I like seeing those shoes on you.
Reminds me of last summer.”

I smile at the thought of our summer romance;
probably the best summer of my life. We duck into a little pizza
place for lunch. We order our food and a carafe of house red
wine.

“So tell me, why did you drink so much Friday
night at the club? You said you had stopped drinking like
that.”

Greg pours me a glass of wine and then
himself, taking a drink before answering. “I was nervous about
seeing you.” He says, matter of factly.

Oh. I can’t help myself, my stomach does a
couple of flips, but I ask him as nonchalantly as possible.
“Why?”

“Well… I’d heard you were engaged and I
wasn’t sure if I could handle that and see you.” He says this
quickly, looking at my face as soon as it is out – gauging my
reaction.

“Then why did you come?”

Greg shrugs, “I wanted to see you more than I
cared about a broken heart.”

Oh. I take a drink of my wine and look away,
suddenly feeling awkward. So he does still have feelings for
me.

“Does that make you uncomfortable?”

I look back to Greg. “Honestly Greg, I don’t
know. I’m kinda confused right now.”

“Why Mallory?” He asks, and I can tell that
he really wants to know, that he really cares for me.

“Because Dean and I just broke up, and I’m
heartbroken about that… and… I find myself having feelings for you.
I’m confused because I know I should be a wreck because of the
breakup, and part of me is, but at the same time, you make me
happy.”

A slow smile fills his face. “I make you
happy?”

“You do. You’ve always made me happy.”

Greg nods and looks down. I have a sudden
pang of fear that I have given him hope about us. More than likely
false hope, and I open my mouth to say something, but close it
before he sees. What do I say to him? Should he have hope? Even I
can’t answer the question.

Our food arrives and I am saved. Greg is
jovial during the meal and I’m happy to see him happy. I know I
have been the cause of his sadness these past months and this
breaks my heart.

After we eat, we walk the length of the small
downtown on one side and back up the other. We walk into almost all
of the stores selling trinkets, taking our time, acting like
tourists. I almost forget that we aren’t a couple. We go into a
bookstore which reminds me of the one in the first Twilight movie.
I almost want to go looking for books on vampires and werewolves -
almost. Greg buys a wind chime there which makes the most melodic
deep sound.

We get back to the car and I take my shoes
off, rubbing each in turn. I sit cross-legged in the seat as Greg
makes his way back to the highway and the ferry.

“That was fun, thank you for today.” I look
over at him and smile.

“My pleasure.”

We are mostly quiet on the way to the ferry;
I’m sure Greg is lost in his own thoughts like me. It’s dark by the
time we get to the ferry landing and I’m surprised that I’m
disappointed when we get right on the ferry. The day is almost
perfect and I don’t want it to end.

Greg leans toward me after we’re parked. “Do
you want to go up, or do you want to stay here.”

I’m looking at his lips as he says this,
knowing that my willpower is waning – I want to kiss him. Really,
really, really bad. I look back up into his eyes, “I think we’d
better go up.”

Greg chuckles and we go up one level, sitting
opposite one another in a booth. We sit smiling at each other and
watching the passengers walk by. I try to break the ice and talk
about something light.

“I haven’t seen much of you since September,
what have you been up to? How were your holidays?”

The smile fades from his face and I instantly
know this was the wrong thing to ask.

“I don’t want to talk about it Mallory.”

“Okay.” I say quietly. I look out the window
and Greg takes my hand.

He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes.
“I’m sorry. I know that this has been a difficult time for you, but
it’s also… excuse me.”

Greg gets up and walks away, leaving my hand
awkwardly on the table. I sit by myself for an extraordinary amount
of time and watch for him, thinking that he will walk around a
corner any minute. I get nervous when the overhead speaker
announces that the ferry will be landing soon and it’s time to
return to our vehicles. Greg still hasn’t come back. I walk down to
the SUV, thinking that Greg will meet me there.

I wait for him, leaning against the front
grill, watching as other passengers get into their vehicles. I can
see the landing coming up ahead and I keep glancing back to the
door – where is he? Maybe he’s looking for me? The ferry lands and
the employees start tying it up to the dock. I’m getting anxious
now – where the fuck is Greg? I hear the SUV beep and suddenly his
hand is on the small of my back, guiding me to the passenger side
and opening the door for me. He runs around and gets into the
driver’s seat, starting the car with no time to spare as we drive
off with our lane right away.

I say nothing as we drive through Edmonds
making our way to the freeway. What was that about? We get on the
freeway and Greg talks for the first time, making no mention why he
was late.

“Do you want to come over to my place for
dinner? I’ll try to make you spanakopita.”

“You know how to make spanakopita?” I ask
incredulously. If he knows how to make Greek food, this is news to
me.

“Of course. I just need to stop at the
grocery store first… and call my mom.”

I laugh. “Hmmm, that sounds wonderful.
But….”

“But what?”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“Why?”

“Greg....” I hesitate. Do I really need to
state the obvious?

“What?” He asks innocently, matching my
tone.

“If I go to your house for spanakopita, I’m
afraid it will not end well.”

Greg laughs, “What do you mean?”

“Let’s see, how do I put this? I’m afraid I
will jump you and we will spend all night having sex.”

I see his eyebrows raise in the light from
the oncoming traffic.

“So you are definitely coming over then.”

I throw my head back and laugh.

“Do what you want to do Mallory, not what you
think you’re supposed to do. Lord knows, it’s never stopped you
before.”

I look over to him and see no hint of a smile
on his face. Is he serious? “What do you mean by that?”

“Nothing. But if you want to come over for
dinner, then come over for dinner. I promise not to sleep with you.
I won’t even touch you.”

“Oh Greg, you really know how to woo a
girl.”

Greg laughs and grabs for my hand, kissing
the palm and glancing at me.

“Where do you think this is going Greg?”

“Where what is going?”

“Us.”

“I don’t know… but it feels good to spend
time with you again.”

“I think you’d better take me home.” I say
quietly.

Greg nods and passes the grocery store. I
will be home soon – is this what I really want? He pulls into the
parking lot and stops at the apartment’s front entry.

“Thank you for a wonderful day. And for last
night.” I look at his face and see a sad smile.

“My pleasure.”

We sit looking at one another and I make no
attempt at leaving the car. My gaze moves to his lips and I
deliberate what a kiss would mean right now. I look back to his
eyes and see the familiar hunger there. Something deep inside tells
me that if I kiss him now then I will end up in his bed
tonight.

I grab the handle and open the door
abruptly.

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

I unlock the front door and walk up the
stairs to the second floor. I turn around at the landing and see
the SUV still parked in the same spot, Greg watching me. I give a
little wave and walk down the hall to the apartment.

Tara is in the kitchen
making dinner
when I walk in the door. She looks surprised when she sees me. “I
didn’t think you were coming home tonight.”

“Really, why?”

Tara shrugs. “I thought you’d be with Greg
tonight.”