Conduit (15 page)

About fifteen minutes later, they’d trudged through most of
the building, and as Riley had suspected, the rest of the rooms they went
through had been empty.  Even before the small group had reached the area where
Celia and Griffin must have entered, Lev sensed something was amiss.  He tried
to tell himself he was just overly sensitive, but that didn’t make him feel any
less apprehensive.

Just as they entered the next room, Lev heard what sounded
like someone crying.  Immediately, his thoughts jumped to Elizabeth because he
couldn’t fathom who else would do that here.  Then his eyes told him the truth.

Celia.

She leaned over Griffin, cradling his head against her
body.   Even as Lev looked on in shock, Evan flew forward, taking Griffin’s
still form from her in his careful, unfailing hands.

At that moment, Lev understood the depths of his sister’s
love for Griffin.  In some ways, it matched his own, and if it ran half as deeply,
she would never get over this, not if Evan couldn’t somehow change this.

Evan’s wings suddenly flared into existence in a blinding
flash of white that forced Lev to close his eyes.  As an angel, the brilliance
had never bothered him.  As a human, he found it blinding and painful, and he
had to force himself not to look.  In the darkness, Lev realized the silence
had returned.  Celia no longer cried, but that meant nothing, just that she was
holding out one last hope for salvation.  They all held out hope.

“What…what’s that?” a small voice asked, forcing Lev to open
his eyes.

He found the girl standing there, shielding her eyes as she
saw Evan’s true form exposed.  Granted, the light drowned out most of her view,
but she’d probably seen enough to know the supernatural when she saw it.

“It’s hard to explain,” Lev said, unsure what to tell her.

The girl shuddered.  “Is he a creature like the one that held
me?”  Her body trembled, causing her voice to waver.  She backed away and ran
straight into Lev.

“No, he’s nothing like that,” Lev reassured her, offering a
quick smile.  He didn’t know what else he could do to make things better for
her.  “He does have extraordinary powers, but he’d never use them except to
help others, not to hurt them.”

She shuddered so hard Lev felt the spastic motions through
his shirt.  Troubled by her fear, he wrapped his arm around her, trying to
offer reassurance.  No, he didn’t feel his world was all that secure, but
considering what she’d experienced and how little she probably understood of
it, she was far worse off, and the fear was nowhere near subsiding,
unfortunately.

Despite the blinding light in front of him, Lev looked ahead,
trying to see what was happening.  Still, all he could manage was a few
glimpses of spread wings that blocked everything.  He found himself gritting
his teeth and praying.  If they lost Griffin and one of them had to carry his
soul, how would Lev ever be able to tell Elizabeth?  It was going to be bad
enough to have to share news of Jimmie’s passing.  This would be too much. 
She’d probably blame him, and he couldn’t fault her for that.  If he hadn’t
been changed into a mortal, he would’ve been able to do more, so much more that
she deserved.

Now he was pretty much useless.  He couldn’t even fend off a
dybbuk
when he had to.

A few seconds later, Evan’s wings slowly dimmed, and for a
moment, it was only the half-light of the room that illuminated his feathers.  He
slowly tucked his wings back, and once in place, they vanished from sight as he
stood and backed away.

Griffin lay still.  Celia wavered on her feet, threatening to
fall even as Evan gripped her shoulder.  More tears spilled from her face, and
she said a single word: “No.”

Then Lev saw Griffin’s chest slowly rise and fall, just
before his eyes fluttered open.  He gasped in pain, which was all it took for
Celia to drop to her knees and wrap her arms around him.

Chapter Fifteen

“What’s your name?” Lev asked as he and the girl sat at a
campground about thirty minutes from the building they’d earlier invaded.  The
girl had, for some reason, not left his side, which in and of itself was odd,
but he accepted it as maybe her way of dealing with a situation outside her
control.  There was no way of knowing what she’d been through.

“Clarissa Smith.”  She clenched her lips shut, obviously
uncomfortable talking about herself.

“Where are your parents?” Lev looked at Celia standing
outside of tent she’d pitched for Griffin.  Celia’s face was dirty, and she
frowned painfully, the longing obvious.

“I…I don’t know.”  She licked her lips nervously and tilted
her head down, pretending to study her broken, dirty nails.

“What do you mean you don’t know?” He cocked his head, trying
to understand.  How could she not?

“I haven’t exactly seen them in a long time.”  She squinted
and spotted a cuticle that she abruptly ripped off, drawing blood.

            “You mean since you were
taken?” Lev asked, trying to clarify.

            “No, since I was ten.” 
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.  “My parents abandoned me”

            Lev flinched like someone
was about to punch him, and he quickly realized that would’ve been easier, really. 
A punch you could block.  The truth?  Not so much.  That usually scored the
knockout.

            “I’m sorry.”  Although
Lev meant it, he also knew how lame it sounded even to him.  Still, it was all
he could think of.

            “Me, too.”  Her words
came out sounding like a sigh.

            In spite of the weighted
conversation, Lev found himself staring at Celia, really not liking the way she
seemed unable to move away from Griffin’s tent, as though she feared if she
turned away she’d lose him altogether.

            “Look, as much as I hate
to do this, I need to check in with Celia.  She’s got some stuff going on. I’ll
be back.”

            Clarissa nodded to show
she’d heard.  “I guess I’ll be here.  It’s not like I have anywhere to go.” 
Her tone came out wistful and lonely, something that suggested she didn’t want
to be alone, and Lev would have to deal with that later…right after he talked
to Celia.  That was his crisis of the moment.  Clarissa would have to wait.

            Taking a deep breath, he
touched Celia’s arm to get her attention.  “Hey, why don’t we take a walk?”

            “I’d rather not.”  She
stiffened and stared at the tent like she could see straight through it to
where Griffin lay oblivious to everything, including Celia, which bothered her
greatly. 

“You standing out here, pacing isn’t going to accomplish
anything or make Griffin get any better any faster.”  He tugged at her arm, and
this time she reluctantly followed.

As the two of them headed off, Lev looked over at Clarissa
and found her watching him, a frown contorting her expression into something
unreadable.  Still, Lev didn’t have long to glean any insight in her feelings
as Riley and Evan suddenly appeared and struck up a conversation with her.  Her
expression went blank, and she looked at them, her gaze not quite leaving Lev.

Lev wanted to know what that might portend.  Part of him
didn’t care.  He’d have a chance to ask Evan later.  That would have to be
enough, so Lev and Celia kept walking. That way, at least they’d have a few
moments to talk.

When they’d finally found themselves a little quiet, Celia
glared at him instead of the lake they found themselves near. 

“You know, I really don’t think I need the lecture you’re
about to give me.”

“Really?” Lev looked out at the lake—the surface appeared
like a wide glass rim, smooth and untouched.

“Really.”  She folded her arms across her chest.

“Look, maybe I’m not the one to have this conversation with,
but I don’t see anyone else stepping up.  I just want to know why you refuse to
tell Griffin you’re in love with him.”

“It’s not a good time.” 

“It’s never going to be a good time, and you know it.  You
think you’re strong in not telling him—that you’re somehow saving him from
something bad—but I saw the way you held him when we thought he was dead.  All
of us knew exactly what was going through your mind.”  He shook his head as
images of that moment flooded back to him.  “Probably the biggest reason Evan
fought so hard to save Griffin was because he couldn’t stand the thought of
what such a loss would do to you.  Do you understand of that?”

“Enough.”  She turned away, and he wondered if she were
crying.

“Is it?”  He gripped her arm, forcing her to face him.  “You
think this pain is bad?” he asked as he saw the tears.  “That watching him
fight to survive is hard?  What happens if he dies before you tell him how you
feel?  How do you think you’ll live with that kind of loss?”

Immediately her shoulders caved in, hollowing her out.  She
started forward and stumbled, but Lev caught her, and when he felt her trembling
with the tears she couldn’t contain, he wrapped his arms around her and held
her tightly to him, wishing he could fix all the broken places in her heart as
she had done for him so many times before, but even had he still been an angel,
some things stood outside the realm of possibility, and this was the best he
could offer.

When Celia finally calmed and slowly withdrew from the
shelter of Lev’s arms, she wiped the tears away.  “You’re right.  I just didn’t
expect this—any of this.  It was never supposed to be like this.”

“Who does?”  Lev raked his fingers through his hair, trying
to calm his own frazzled nerves.   It would help if he could stop going through
a mental checklist of all the bad things which might’ve happened—and all the
things which could still happen.

Celia took a cleansing breath and stared out at the water. 
“It’s a beautiful night.”

“Yes,” Lev agreed.  “It is.”

“Do you think the girl knows anything that can help us?” 
Celia pushed the hair from her face.

Lev shrugged.  “I don’t know.  She seems pretty scattered.”

“Really?”  Celia frowned.  “Well, just a heads up.  I kind of
get the impression she likes you.”

Uncomfortable, Lev stiffened and tried to go through his
dealings with Clarissa to see if in hindsight he might agree.  He didn’t.  She
was just a frightened teenager in the middle of a supernatural mess.  That was
it.

“She’s been through a lot.”  He kept his tone even, hoping doing
so might prevent his sister from pressing the point.  He didn’t want to draw
any more attention to it than necessary.

As Lev stared up at the sky, a shooting star crossed the
heavens in a streak of white light.  Lev once again wished only for Elizabeth,
not that he believed in the power of a shooting star to grant wishes.  No, he
just believed in hope.  Glancing at his sister, he saw that she, too, watched
the sky, and he knew exactly what she wanted.  Deep down, he hoped that in
spite of everything, she was granted it.

“We should probably get back,” he said, nodding at the camp. 
Celia nodded and followed his lead.

Heading back into camp, they found both Riley and Evan
waiting for them—Evan definitely much more patient than Riley.  Celia, however,
didn’t bother meeting with them.  Instead, she went directly to Griffin’s tent
to check on him.

            Once she’d vanished, Lev
studied their determined faces and didn’t bother with small talk. 

            “What did you find out?”
he asked Evan.

            “Clarissa doesn’t
remember a lot,” the angel admitted, “but she seems to think she can help us
get to where the main nest of
dybbuks
is.  It’s not too far from here.”

            Although Lev was grateful
for the information, he really hadn’t expected it, not considering how
frightened the girl had been.

            “So when do we go?”  Lev raked
his fingers through his hair, already wondering if this place might be where
Elizabeth had been taken.  It made sense, considering why the
dybbuks
had taken her in the first place—to use as a conduit.

            “Tomorrow morning,” Riley
confirmed. 

            “Tomorrow?” Lev burst
out, his eyes bulging as anger surged through him.  “Why are we waiting?”

            Silently, Evan pointed to
the tent where Griffin lay as silent and unmoving as a stone.

            “Can’t you do something
to heal him more quickly?”  Lev shifted his weight from one foot to the other. 
He’d been so close this time, only to have to stop and wait yet again, which
made him wonder if she’d just be taken from him before he could get to her.

            “Don’t you think if there
were I would’ve already done it?” Evan asked, a slight edge to his voice.  “I
was barely able to keep him alive, and the fact that he should be able to
travel tomorrow is no small miracle.”  He gave Lev a look that suggested he
calm down.

            Lev knew his father was
right.  It just hurt to keep waiting and wondering.  “Do we just keep going
through this until we can’t find her or something else happens?”

            Riley frowned. “It’s just
a matter of a few hours, Lev.  If she’s there, she’ll probably still be there. 
We have to hold our position until morning.”

            Although Lev knew Riley
was right, the thought brought no comfort, and rather than get into it, Lev
just walked away, heading to his tent.  It wasn’t so much that he thought he’d
be able to sleep, but that he needed time on his own.  It was all just too
much.

            On the way, he peered toward
Carissa’s tent, but she must have disappeared inside; there was no sign of
her.  Perhaps, he thought, that was probably better considering the gist of the
last conversation he and Celia had shared.  He didn’t think the girl was
fixated on him, but he certainly didn’t know how to deal with that—if he were
wrong. No, the best thing for him was his own tent, where he could shut the
rest of the world out—for at least as long as it would be shut out.

            Long after Lev had lain
down and closed his eyes, hoping sleep would claim him, he found himself wide
awake, haunted by the stillness surrounding him, so complete it stifled his
breath.  The only things which seemed to bring even a moment of peace were
thoughts of Elizabeth during better moments—moments he’d hoped and prayed would
last forever.

But they hadn’t, and now he was here, alone, tormented with
how desperately wrong things had gone—and could yet go.  He seemed to have
become the poster child for such things.

So many times as an angel he’d heard humans bitterly lament
the unfairness of their circumstances.  This, however, was the first time he’d
understood what that meant—how that feeling could consume you and burn you to
the core

He might’ve just gone on railing against a fate he neither
wanted nor deserved, but deep in the pocket of stillness around him, he heard someone
cry out.

            Clarissa.  He might’ve known
as much, and even though he knew he should go to her, part of him held back,
knowing he was his own jumbled mess of pain and confusion.  What could he bring
to the table to help her in light of that?

            The sobbing grew louder,
and that made it difficult to ignore.  She could go on crying all night, or he
could just go into her tent and try to help her make peace with whatever demons
she faced.  Considering he probably wasn’t going to get any sleep, he might as
well try to do something.

            With that thought in
mind, he took a deep breath and sat up slowly.  He listened for a few more
minutes, and when the girl sounded no closer to winding down, he stood and
headed her way. 

            As he’d expected, her
tent was unzipped, and even in the moonlight he could see her lying on her
side, half curled into a ball.  Her whole body shook, and she took in
shuddering gasps that tore through him.  What had the
dybbuks
done to
her and quite possibly Elizabeth?  That thought horrified him beyond measure.

            Perhaps that was what had
really drove him here—the burning desire to learn what had happened. 
Unsettled, Lev took a deep breath and slipped into the tent and knelt over
her.  As he reached to gently shake her, his hand trembled.  Inasmuch as she
was clearly gripped by a horrible nightmare, he found himself reluctant to wake
her. It was only when her whimpering grew louder and he couldn’t take it that
he forced himself to nudge her.

            At first, she seemed not
to recognize that anyone had even touched her, but then, as he shook her a
little harder, she stiffened and gasped, and her eyes flew open.  She opened
her mouth to scream, but Lev sensed it and slid his hand over her mouth to keep
things quiet